***
“What can I get you?” The weary bartender asked me as he propped himself up at the hotel bar. His eyes were sliding closed like he couldn’t be bothered with the world anymore. I knew how he felt but rest was too far away from me for me to be able to embrace it.
The dinner was over now, most of the diners had gone to bed but I wasn’t ready to sleep just yet. I felt too wired and irritated to get any real rest.
“Gin and tonic please,” I replied with a slightly fake grin. “Thanks.”
“Nice order,” a wry voice interjected, causing me to spin on my bar stool. “Make that two, there’s nothing better than a good G and T.”
I couldn’t believe it, my heart actually stopped dead in my chest as I realized who it was. The girl, the redhead with green eyes from the dinner. I wanted to speak to her after we all finished eating but I couldn’t seem to find her. The fact that she was here with me now made my heart beat faster. I was so damn excited to spend some time with my potential new friend.
“So, are you here with the bride or groom?” she asked while chucking a twenty at the bartender, effectively buying my drink for me.
“Bride, you?”
“I work part time at the same IT company as the groom.” She screwed up her nose as she said that which suggested she didn’t totally love her job but she moved on the conversation too quickly for me to ask questions. “Are you like, the bridesmaid or something? There has to be some reason for that dress.”
I wasn’t sure why but I felt the intense urge to tease this woman. “What do you mean?” I asked in a mock offended manner. “This is my favorite dress, I wear it to any event I go to.”
“There’s no way that’s true, you seem too cool for that.” She pursed her lips and extended her hand to me. “I’m Amy, by the way. Amy Jones.”
I took her hand and shook it. “Lisa Wilkinson. It’s good to meet you, Amy. I’m glad to have someone else who actually seems cool at this wedding.”
“You mean you aren’t loving parading around in your favorite dress?” As she shot me a smile I felt my heart flutter happily. Thank God, it finally seemed like I was going to have a good time.
“Alright, you’re right. I hate this damn thing.” I flicked up and curled my lips in disgust. “But what are you going to do? I have to keep the bride happy this weekend.”
“If you have to do that tomorrow then I suggest you enjoy yourself tonight.” She wiggled her eyebrows at me making the prospect very appealing. “I suggest we drink some more so you have enough of a hangover to get you through the day.”
“Yeah, sounds fun. ‘Do you take Jessie to be your lawfully wedded wife? Wait, what’s that? The bridesmaid is vomiting everywhere!’ Jessie will love me forever.”
“Ah, don’t worry about it.” Amy waved her hand dismissively at me. “She can just get revenge when it’s your wedding.”
“I don’t think I’ll have a wedding…” I tried to say that without sounding self pitying, but I wasn’t quite sure that I managed to pull it off.
“Even better, no revenge!” Amy clinked her glass against mine in a cheers gesture. She didn’t think it was appropriate to ask me why I was such an old maid! “So come on, let’s have some fun.”
It was as if a fire had been lit underneath me and all colors returned to my vision. Here was another lady who appeared to be the same age as me who obviously didn’t have a significant other in her life—no one serious enough to bring to the wedding anyway—and she didn’t care. She wasn’t torturing herself over the possibility of not getting married, she was here to have some fun and that was the end of it.
Speaking with her was so much better than talking to anyone else.
“Sure, why not?” I downed my drink and grinned. “Let’s do this.”
As Amy ordered in the next round of drinks I couldn’t stop staring at her face. She had high cheekbones and a smattering of adorable freckles that spread across her nose. There was something utterly intoxicating about her and I couldn’t wait to find out where it would lead.
“You wanna tell me about yourself?” she asked while handing me the drink. “Or do you want to just drink?”
“What do you want to know?” All of a sudden I was overcome with the sense that I was boring and not good enough for anyone. It was as if I was the geeky girl in school who wanted to impress the teenager. This wasn’t a situation that I’d ever found myself in before because when I was in school it was totally the other way around.
“Ooh, I don’t know.” She tapped gently on her chin which only drew my eyes to her lips. “What did you eat for dinner last Friday?”
I burst into laughter, I just couldn’t help it. That was so unexpected. I thought she would ask me something so much heavier.
“I got a burger and chips on the way back from work. What about you?”
“Can’t remember,” she shrugged and smirked. “I’m a DJ in my spare time, when I’m not working at the IT company with Jamie, and I was working that night so I ate at some ungodly hour.”
“Wow, a DJ.” I tried to imagine her bouncing away behind some decks, riling up a crowd. It was a pretty cool image actually. “That’s awesome. I bet that’s all drug fueled fun, isn’t it?”
Amy laughed at me while tossing her head back in mirth. “Nah, it’s pretty tame really. Just tiring. What do you do?”
“I work for CADE,” I smiled as I realized that we shared an interest. It might not have been the same genre of music, I worked more with guitar bands, but still it felt pretty cool. “As the editor.”
“Oh no way!” She looked impressed which admittedly was a relief. It was nice to not feel completely dull. “I bet that’s a lot of debauchery too.”
“No, no, it’s tame.” I nodded as I spoke. “Good fun too.” I took a sip while I decided on my own silly question to ask. “So, what do you think about the economic situation in Cuba?”
“Erm,” Amy giggled. “I think it’s unstable and a little troubling. But you know, who am I to comment on such political…whatever.”
"That’s not a bad answer!” We shared a laugh. “I’m very impressed with how quickly you can think on your feet.”
After that the mad questions fired off like rapid shots, allowing me and Amy to learn more about one another without actually going in too deep, and what we actually found out was that we had a whole lot in common:
“Dogs or cats?” Both of us dogs.
“TV Series or movies?” We both enjoyed a good box set.
“Vampires or werewolves?” Neither, zombies of course!
By the end of it I found myself thinking that I was having the best day of my life, which was very far away from how the day had started out. Amy had managed to drag the carefree happiness out of me that I hadn’t seen in a very long time, and I couldn’t wait to see where it would lead.
***
We staggered up the stairs through the hallway of the hotel towards the bedrooms after the bar had closed. I wasn’t even sure what we were laughing at anymore we just couldn’t seem to stop. It was as if we were sharing a secret joke that even we didn’t get.
I wasn’t ready for the night to end yet, I was having too much fun. The rehearsal dinner had turned into something incredible and I wasn’t quite done. Soon enough it would be the wedding and that wasn’t going to be any fun at all.
“I’m so glad that I met you,” Amy muttered gleefully. “I was having such a crappy time by myself.”
“Yeah, me too. Honestly, I was about ready to head home!” I gave her a grin. “Do you want to come into my room for some more drinks?” The words tumbled out of my mouth without me having any control over them. “I think I have a mini bar in there.”
“Yes!” Amy punched her hand against her head in an over the top gesture which had me laughing all over again. “I would love some more drinks. I’m definitely not drunk enough yet.”
It was weird, I didn’t feel too wasted either. We’d been drinking for hours but I was more high on th
e laugh I was having than anything else.
I slid the key into the lock and twisted it hard. The door fell open a little more rapidly than I was expecting which caused me to fall through like an idiot. I almost tumbled to the ground.
“No more for you,” Amy said in a sing song tone of voice. “You’ve had far too much already.”
She headed straight for the mini bar and bent down to grab out a couple of drinks. I wasn’t sure why but my eyes lingered on her butt a little longer than they should have done. Of course it was only the booze, that was all. I was admiring her tight body because it was incredible…except there wasn’t any jealousy coursing through my veins. I was just hot instead.
“Vodka?” Amy spun round to smile at me. She caught me staring at her which made my cheeks flame just a little too brightly. I glanced away rapidly but she didn’t seem weirded out at all. If anything her lips curved even further upwards. “With orange juice?”
“Uh huh, yeah sounds good.”
I only dared glancing back as I heard the liquid sloshing into the glass but Amy was still looking at me. My heart leapt excitedly which made me gulp. I was acting weird now, and I needed to stop. I didn’t want to lose Amy before the big day. I might not be able to spend the ceremony with her, but I wanted her to get me through the reception.
As Amy walked towards me wiggling her hips, I pushed the warmth in my chest to one side and I took the glass from her.
“Thank you,” I muttered quietly.
I glugged some of the drink back as Amy sat next to me on the bed which made me feel strange all over again. I needed to talk, to break the silence, before I got swept up in the oddness of the moment.
“So, what are you wearing for the big day tomorrow?” Urgh, why the hell did I ask that? It just made me think of her body which had me weird and fuzzy all over again.
“I have a blue summer dress,” she replied in a sugar sweet tone of voice. “I thought I better look a little wedding-y. I don’t really know how I’m supposed to dress, to be honest. This is my first ever wedding.”
“Yeah, it’s mine too actually. Well, I went to one as a kid but this is the first time as an adult. I’m surprised you aren’t married yourself.” Oh. My. God. I couldn’t believe that I’d just said that! All day long I’d been feeling pissed off about people asking me about my own marital status and I’d just gone and done it myself. “Sorry.” I shook my head. “I don’t know what made me say that.”
“No, it’s fine. I don’t mind.” My body zinged excitedly as her hand edged ever so closely towards me. I couldn’t stop my emotions from flying everywhere. I kept trying to reel it in but things were going nuts all over me anyway. “I’m not married because I haven’t found the right woman for me yet.”
Woman. I pushed myself further back on the bed. Woman, really? I was feeling things for her, I couldn’t seem to stop myself from going crazy, but knowing that she was into women made everything feel that much more serious.
Luckily Amy didn’t seem to notice my overreaction. Either that or she wasn’t really bothered. “How about you?”
“Erm, yeah same reason, I haven’t found the right person that’s all.” I wasn’t sure why I said ‘person’ rather than man, that seemed like a weird omission considering. “I just haven’t ever felt that spark.”
Was that a spark racing through me right now? Is that what I could feel? This was definitely the most…excited I’d ever felt being around a person before. Maybe if Chris made me feel that way, I never would’ve let him go however boring he was.
“Yeah, the spark is awesome!” Amy smirked to herself as if she was thinking about all the times she’d felt the infamous spark. I couldn’t help feeling jealous about that. I wanted her to experience this newness with me! It left me feeling a little overwhelmed.
Amy turned her whole body to face me and I got the impression that she wanted me to do the same. I paused for only a beat, before caving to the craziness racing through my body and I twisted too.
We stared at each other and millions of unsaid things flowed between us. My heart balled up in my throat, my stomach churned, I felt a powerful shiver tearing up and down my spine. I was entranced by Amy; by her beauty and the fun way she made me feel. I felt confident around her, I felt like I was worthwhile and that sensation was intoxicating. I couldn’t recall the last time I’d had that sense of self-worth and it was really nice.
“There’s something about you,” Amy narrowed her eyes and gave me a cheeky look. “I don’t know what it is, Lisa Wilkinson but there’s something about you.”
I parted my lips ready to reply. I wasn’t totally sure what I wanted my response to do, but it hardly mattered anyway because before I could say anything, Amy’s lips had crashed into mine and all of a sudden we were kissing like there was no tomorrow. Like horny teenagers that had only just managed to get their hands on one another.
It started off sweet and a little bit tender, but as Amy’s tongue snaked between my lips the passion intensified. Her hands knotted up in my hair and I actually felt brave enough to weave my hands around her waist. I pulled her towards me and kept her lips next to mine feeling like a damn dream.
This was it, this was what my life had been missing all these years. No one had ever made me feel like this before and I was nowhere near ready to let that go just yet.
***
What the…?
I bolted upright in a panic, feeling ice cold terror racing through my veins. My heart hurt because it was pounding so vigorously against my chest and my breaths could barely get out of my mouth. As my brain spun I tried to work out exactly what had me so caught up, but I couldn’t quite work it out. I had something that I needed to panic about, but I couldn’t recall what.
What have I done? What did I do?
As my eyes flickered around I realized that I wasn’t in my tiny, cluttered apartment and things became a little clearer in my brain. I was in a hotel, at my sister’s wedding, of course, the day we’d been planning for almost a year, and today was the big day…
Amy.
Her name came out of nowhere, it popped totally unexpectedly into my brain, dragging memories along with it. The dinner, the drinks, the time in my room, the kiss…
Oh God, that kiss. That was something else. It seemed to come out of nowhere, but it also felt like it had been building forever too. As her lips finally met mine I lit up like a damn Christmas tree. I felt like every inch of my body was electrified. I felt like a brand new woman as I kissed Amy, it was the most incredible feeling ever.
There was a difference between kissing a woman and a man. Amy’s lips were softer, sweeter, more like mine. It was a nice change that I wanted to explore further. Maybe if I hadn’t been so nervous I would’ve let that happen. Maybe… I wasn’t sure. I liked the idea of it.
Then, afterwards, she left. It did get a little awkward because I fell into a strange silence, but it didn’t feel uncomfortable. She just said that she needed sleep which was fair enough. I needed some rest too, especially since I had to stand up in front of lots of people. I lay in my bed afterwards feeling everything all at once. I didn’t know what to think, but I knew I felt good.
But what the hell was I going to do now? How the hell was I going to make it through the day? Amy was going to be there for sure, I already knew that, but what I didn’t know was how we would act around one another.
Ring, ring… Ring, ring…
“Hello?” I muttered grumpily into the handset. “Jessie? You okay?”
“Where are you?” she screamed in an almost hysterical way. “You’re supposed to be in my room already helping me to get dressed?”
Shit, as I glanced at the clock and I noticed the time I realized that she was right. “Yeah, okay, I’m sorry. I just need to hop in the shower. I’ll be over in a moment.”
“I need you now, Lisa, I’m going crazy over here. Things are starting to go wrong, the flowers are…”
“Okay, okay, I’m coming now. Just stay calm I�
��ll be there in five.”
I hung up the phone and tossed it onto the bed sheet before Jessie could stress me out even further with her rant about nothing. I wasn’t being cruel, I knew it was her wedding day and that she had a right to be crazy but she was always such a drama queen and I really needed a minute. Plus, if she thought I was going to her without having a shower first then she was crazy.
I flicked the water on quickly and jumped under the stream before it was even really hot enough. I just needed the night before washed off my skin. I didn’t feel bad about it or anything, I just needed a clear mind for the day. I wasn’t going to be able to get through the wedding if all I could think about was Amy and those sweet tasting, plump lips of hers…
Almost right away, as soon as her face popped into my brain I felt a pulsing sensation that emanated from my core. It felt strange, unexpected, powerful.
Was I turned on? Did I really like Amy that much? The thought of going…further than a kiss excited and terrified me in equal measures. I wanted it to happen, but I was absolutely petrified at the same time. I bit down on my lip and I pictured it happening. The fantasy was one thing, it was exciting, a thrill, but I knew for a fact that the reality would be something else entirely.
Ring, ring… Ring, ring…
“Fuck’s sake,” I muttered angrily under my breath. “Give it a rest, Jessie.”
I rolled my eyes and shampooed my hair rapidly, before diving out of the comforting warmth of the water and patting my body down. Jessie would be pissed because I had to go to her now with wet hair which would instantly give me away, but it seemed that she had many more things on her mind. Hopefully she’d be too distracted to care.
I threw on sweat pants and a tee shirt and I grabbed the bag with the hideous orange bridesmaid dress to take along with me. I knew Jessie had picked it on purpose because she wanted to look the best in all the photographs, and I couldn’t blame her for that, but it did make me cringe inside to think about wearing this today.
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