by Rachel Jonas
“Can I tell her or should you?”
Blythe shrugged at Toni’s question. “It wasn’t like I was keeping it a secret from her. I just hadn’t seen her to fill her in yet.”
“Is that a yes?” Toni beamed, to which Blythe rolled her eyes playfully.
“Yes, big mouth, you may speak.”
Toni didn’t take offense to the insult, bouncing in her seat to turn and face me completely. “Well, these two,” she said, pointing at Blythe and Manny, “may or may not have been caught making out a couple days ago.”
Toni grinned from ear to ear, having finally gotten to spill the beans.
“Caught? By who?” I asked, covering my mouth with both hands to hide my laugh.
A reluctant Marcela raised her hand into the air. “Unfortunately, that unlucky witness was me,” she shared unenthusiastically. “And if you ever find a spell for memory scrubbing, sign me up. I don’t care what it costs. Nor do I care how painful.”
Toni and I both burst out laughing, and I imagined how awkward that must have been for all three parties involved.
My gaze landed on Blythe next. “I freakin’ knew there was something up with you two!”
“Really?” she asked. “Because we sure as heck didn’t.”
Did she really not recognize how much she stared and smiled at Manny? I knew a thing or two about that, seeing as how I’d once denied feelings I wasn’t ready to face.
On cue, Rayen stepped into the living room to join us. He’d been in the kitchen, washing dishes after our dinner for two. Nothing fancy; just sandwiches and soup. I didn’t miss the thoughtful gaze Blythe shifted toward him, though. Or, perhaps, it was more curious than anything. It wasn’t lost on me that she’d been among those who warned me of the cost of bringing him back, and after what I’d seen a few nights ago when he shifted, I couldn’t help but to wonder if the side-effects had only been limited to changing me.
“Hey,” my friends greeted him collectively, and he echoed the phrase.
Blythe didn’t waste time to start speaking her thoughts aloud. “Feeling okay?”
Rayen smiled, maybe thinking the question was a bit strange. “I’m good. As far as I know, anyway.”
Silently, I prayed Blythe would leave it alone. He had enough on his mind without having more cause to worry.
“Seen anything new we should know about on patrol?” she asked next, unknowingly heading down the very road I hoped to steer clear of.
Rayen pushed a hand behind his neck. “Actually, I haven’t been out lately. Guess you could say the others benched me for a while. They seem to be concerned about me, too, but I feel fine.”
I imagined that to be mostly true, but I also recalled the many conversations where he mentioned feeling a bit off.
“Must suck being stuck inside all the time,” Marcela chimed in.
Rayen’s gaze shifted to me and my face warmed as I believed we shared a similar thought. Sure, being ‘benched’, as he stated, had its downside, but there were also some positives.
“Eh, I wouldn’t say it’s all bad. Noelle and I always manage to find interesting ways to keep busy.”
He winked and a flash of heat rushed up my neck and face at his words, recalling some of those ‘interesting’ encounters he spoke of.
“Okay, ewww. Forget I even said anything,” Marcela gagged. Meanwhile, Toni raised an approving brow at me.
“Anyway,” I sighed, needing to change the subject, “where you guys headed?”
The once lighthearted moment turned quiet when my friends all shared a look. Still, no one answered.
Toni jumped when I reached toward her shoulder and popped the strap of her bikini top where it peeked out from beneath her tank. “Obviously swimming will be involved.”
Caught, she sighed. “We weren’t going to say anything because we knew you had to play it safe, but … some kids from school are headed to the beach. Nothing big, really.” I hadn’t missed how she tried to downplay the gathering.
Feeling a bit uncomfortable all of a sudden, I pushed my hair behind my ears. “I mean, am I, specifically, not invited? Or—”
“No!” she rushed to say, placing her hand on my knee. “It’s nothing like that. We just remembered what happened at the lagoon and didn’t want you getting triggered. And, honestly, we just weren’t sure it was all that safe for you.”
I appreciated her being truthful. No, my friends didn’t think I was a freak or anything, but they knew something wasn’t quite right.
“But you’re welcome to come if you want to,” Marcela said quickly.
“And if you’re allowed to,” Toni added, making me wince at that term.
Allowed …
“She can do whatever she wants,” Rayen interjected, making me breathe a little easier to hear that he, too, disagreed that I needed permission to leave the bungalow. The guys only kept watch over me for my own safety.
I peered up at him and felt how big my grin was. “Then we can go?”
There was definitely reluctance within his gaze, but my excitement melted it away.
“Of course,” he answered, “We’ll just make it back before the others.”
I didn’t argue with him on that point. They’d kept close tabs on us both lately.
But … we were both due for a break, and a trip to the ocean was a great place to get one.
Chapter Eleven
Noelle
The shoreline glowed with warm, auburn light given off from the many bonfires that trailed it. All around, brightly colored bikinis, bathing suits, and swim trunks fluttered about as bodies danced in rhythm, each in sync with the beat thumping from a nearby amplifier. Straight ahead, the moon looked like it had emerged right out of the water, its silver track shimmering in the breeze.
My toes moved through the still-warm sand as I drew my knees to my chest, watching another horde sprint toward the ocean. Toni hadn’t shared that so many would be venturing out tonight. There was no denying I was a bit uncomfortable to be surrounded by those who’d had such jacked-up opinions of me over the past months, but I kept my cool.
I glanced left, toward the Jeep parked a good distance away where Rayen sat. He insisted on not crowding me tonight, even though I told him spending time with him could never count as crowding. Still, it was nice to know I could just pop inside his head if I needed to.
A set of fast-moving footsteps approached from behind and I peered up to find Toni hovering over me with a huge grin. When she leaned down to brace her hands on my shoulders, I smiled, too.
“You have no clue how happy I am you came out with us tonight. It’s been super weird at the academy without you,” she shared.
I hadn’t said as much, but life had been strange for me as well since leaving school. Well, since being put out of school. I missed my friends, and even missed some of my coursework a little. However, in the end, I had to be honest with myself. There was no point for me to attend any longer. Being at the academy was a means to an end, an end that was no longer an option—joining the Guard. So, it wasn’t exactly a huge loss that I’d been kicked out.
Now, I only needed to figure out what would come next for me. I wasn’t allowed off the island, and honestly, now that I’d bonded with the guys, I wasn’t sure I wanted to go. At least, not for any reason other than seeing my family.
“We’ll pop in every weekend to make sure you’re not going stir crazy,” she promised before taking the seat beside me. Then, as soon as she did, a familiar face stole my attention.
“You better,” I answered distractedly.
I couldn’t turn away as my gaze followed the guy out of the water, and then over to the palm tree he stood beneath with a group I barely even paid attention to. Because all I saw was him.
David Sinclair Junior himself.
After the ordeal at the Pinning Ceremony, he had so much to say about me, my family, about me being at the academy. Not a single word had been forgotten. Nor had I dismissed how small he made me feel. Granted, Pa
ulo had definitely taught him a lesson, but it still felt like we had unfinished business.
As if to say she agreed wholeheartedly, my wolf perked up. I was certain no one heard the low hum of a groan within my chest as I tried—and failed—to tear my eyes away from David. My skin began to burn, like it tended to do before the sigils showed up. Panic set it. It wasn’t until I reminded myself of the hold the Darkness already had on me that I decided not to give in to what my wolf wanted.
Blood.
David’s blood.
‘Talk to me.’
Rayen’s voice inside my thoughts was startling. ‘About … what?’ I stammered, still feeling how my heart raced with the prospect of settling the score between me and Sir-Piss-A-Lot himself.
‘I don’t really know how to describe it, but … I feel you,’ Rayen tried explaining. ‘You’re upset about something and, somehow, it’s affecting me, too.’
My brow quirked, but Toni was none the wiser. She was laughing and yelling something toward Manny and Marcela in the water.
‘Affecting you how?’ I asked, wanting a clearer understanding of what Rayen meant.
‘I’ve never felt it before. It’s like your anger is contagious. Like … it’s shared between you and I.’
I was silent—literally and in my thoughts—mostly because I hoped his explanation wasn’t confirmation for a theory that had been bugging me for a few days. It initially occurred to me the first time we slept together after bringing him back. I was connected to all the guys, yes, but a part of me felt a different sort of pull when it came to Rayen.
And not the good part of me.
Almost as if the bit of darkness in me … was now drawn to something inside him.
It was entirely possible that this new, shared likeness was what he felt. My rage, my anger … they were his too.
Because the Darkness was in us both.
The moment I thought it, I shoved the theory to the back of my mind. There was no real basis for such an idea. And there was also the fact that I couldn’t bear the thought of him suffering through the same experiences I had to endure.
All because I hadn’t been able to withstand the thought of letting him go.
‘I’m fine,’ I lied. Only, I already knew he hadn’t bought that.
‘Noelle—’
He didn’t say anything more than my name, but it was enough.
‘I spotted that kid,’ I shared with a sigh. ‘The one Paulo roughed up.’
The silence inside my head wasn’t expected. Mostly, because I’d gotten used to the guys acting as the voice of reason when I lacked such a thing. So, naturally, Rayen’s hesitance made me curious.
‘Did he say anything?’
‘Nope. Hasn’t even seen me, I don’t think,’ was my answer. ‘Which is why I’m gonna just leave it alone.’ I nearly sighed out loud with those words, because I wanted to do so much more than just leave it alone.
My wolf responded with another deep growl. I shuddered to think what she’d do if I ever let her completely off her leash.
‘Well, I’ll leave that up to you,’ Rayen concluded, surprising me when he didn’t immediately tell me I’d made the right choice. ‘But if you change your mind,’ he continued, ‘just … don’t leave a mess anyone might find later.’
Pretty sure I, literally, held my breath while processing Rayen’s words. Words I never imagined I’d hear leave the mouth of an Omega. Stunned, I dropped the conversation there, and stood when Toni wanted to join the others who’d just left the water. I followed silently as they headed across the beach. Although I was eventually somewhat distracted by my friends’ conversation—and Manny clumsily tripping over his own feet as we trudged through the sand—I couldn’t stop thinking about Rayen.
Had he just given me permission to hurt that kid?
Or … worse?
The burn returned and I glanced down at my arms to make sure the sigils weren’t back as well. The telltale glow—now purple instead of turquoise—was nowhere in sight, but I did feel different. Like, a hunger within me needed to be quenched.
Typically, I’d rely on thoughts of my guys to break me out of it, acknowledging how disappointed they’d be if I gave in. Only, I’d just been given permission … and my wolf took that as an invitation to act on her impulses.
“I think I left something in the Jeep,” I lied, needing an excuse to walk away from the lively chatter.
My head buzzed with thoughts that weren’t my own. Thoughts of hurting a big-mouthed kid who had, technically, already paid the price for crossing me. Only, that didn’t feel like enough anymore.
Blythe’s eyes were locked on mine and I prayed she didn’t see through me. I had a particularly hard time keeping things from her and Toni.
“Everything good?” she asked lightheartedly, but I knew better. From her curious expression, I guessed she already sensed something was up.
“Yeah,” I said, forcing a smile. “I’m just gonna run back over there and get it. Shouldn’t take more than a sec.”
Her gaze lingered on me a moment, and then she gave a suspicious nod.
I didn’t stick around long enough to see if she’d question me further. Instead, I crossed the beach quickly, feeling how my bones were already starting to shift over one another, in preparation for my wolf to make herself known.
And here I was thinking it was my dragon who was supposed to have the rage issues.
Halfway there, a pain hit my head and I nearly stopped dead in my tracks. The only thing that kept my feet moving was knowing I had to avoid further suspicion, knowing I had to fight proving everyone right in thinking I was every bit as out of control as they already believed.
No, their opinions of me didn’t matter, but how I viewed myself certainly did. If I couldn’t control my temper when it came to a non-factor like David, what chance did I have?
Faint laughter coming from the left stole my attention, and my wolf zeroed in on the sound. I knew right away whose voice she was in tune with, and I knew why his, in particular—because the Darkness had affected every part of me. There was no avoiding David’s small group on my way to the Jeep, so the moment I was in his line of sight, the amusement in his voice faded and all traces of his previous conversation were gone.
“Who invited the freak?”
My fists tightened at my sides, but I forced my feet not to veer.
“Dude, you’re only talking smack because her guardians aren’t around,” one of the others commented. “We all know what happened last time.”
At those words, everyone in their circle erupted in laughter. Well, all except David.
Without turning to confirm, I imagined his face reddening after having been called out.
“Please,” he scoffed. “Let me come across any of them when they’re alone … it’d be a completely different story. Trust me.”
His friends jeered him, teasing him with names that included the one that had been coined that day in the dorm’s foyer. Seemed he hadn’t quite lived it down yet. As their laughter grew louder, I imagined David’s frustration grew as well.
“Fine!” He finally said, his voice carrying above those of his friends. “As soon as she’s off by herself, I’ll prove it to you.”
“How?” one asked.
David was silent a moment, before coming back with his answer. “I’m gonna show her what happens when she’s not protected by her crown or her guards.”
My palms were damp, and I knew the warm slickness was my own blood. The sharp points of claws had begun to emerge and I hated how his challenge made my heart race with excitement. Only, there was no fighting it anymore. My wolf was going to get her wish.
If it was David Sinclair Junior she wanted … she could have him.
Chapter Twelve
Noelle
‘You’ve got company.’
I expected as much, the second I changed my course, headed into the trees instead of my original path toward Rayen in the Jeep. As sure as the day is long, I knew Dav
id would follow, because he now had something to prove to his friends.
‘Need backup?’ Rayen asked.
I kept my pace, heading in deeper—too far for anyone to see, too far for anyone to … hear.
‘I’ll be fine,’ I answered.
‘What’s your plan?’
Something about the calm tone he spoke in lit a fire inside me. Maybe it was because I sensed the full breadth of his confidence in my ability to face whatever came next. I’d been handled with kid-gloves for so long now, it felt nice being let off the proverbial leash for a change.
‘I’m about to teach this dick a lesson,’ I declared. ‘Once and for all.’
Oddly enough, I sensed Rayen’s satisfaction with my response, which brought a smile out of me.
‘I vote you show him you’re a force to be reckoned with all on your own. Even without the Omegas backing you up,’ he encouraged. ‘Just play smart.’
I nodded, as if he were there to see me.
A large tree off to the right caught my attention, and after checking for David’s watchful eyes, I ducked behind it to remove my clothes. It’d be a dead giveaway if my wolf burst through them. Not to mention, when all was said and done, I’d have to hightail it back to the Jeep in the nude.
Not exactly my idea of a good time.
I had to be incredibly quiet, though, as to avoid having David’s wolf sense what I was up to before I was ready, taking away the element of surprise. My shorts hit the ground, and then I eased out of everything else. Panting, and feeling like my heart would burst through my chest, I waited.
Sure enough, a set of quiet footsteps approached and, being downwind, I caught his scent right away. Woven into it, I detected an undercurrent of fear.
I couldn’t contain her anymore. My wolf responded to that potent aroma like a drug she not only wanted, but needed. Typically, it took nearly an entire minute to shift, but not tonight. Tonight, I nearly tripled in size in mere seconds, shaking out dark brown fur as I leapt into the air, with my gaze set on a very surprised half-shifted wolf.
With uncanny precision, David and I met in the air once he finally managed to merge fully with his wolf. Our massive bodies tumbled to the ground with a loud thud. The moment I pinned him on his back, a broad paw pounded the side of my face. Anger swelled, rushing through my veins with the pain.