by SJ Molloy
“Hey,” Lucca says as he bends down to the floor and wraps his arm around my waist, kissing the side of my head. “This is a really nice thing you have done for Sarah. I do not think she has sat down properly with Armando for a meal at a normal time in ages.”
“Honestly, it’s fine. She looked tired and I’m more than happy to help. Plus, this little girly really likes her Aunty Lexi.”
I really like her too.
“I’m glad at least one of her aunts is sensible. Kate and Anna are opening another bottle of champagne.” He laughs.
“Look, Antonia, Uncle Lucca has come to play with us,” I sing to her. She gurgles and coos, then kicks her legs with excitement in the water and both of us end up soaking wet because we are leaning over the tub.
“Cheeky,” Lucca says as he strips his top off.
“She really is adorable,” I say, watching every expression she makes. It amazes me.
“Hmmm, so are you. You look so sexy right now. I am picturing you doing this for our kids. I know I said it earlier, but you are very good with them. You are a natural.” He smiles contently and looks so carefree washing Antonia, as if he’s enjoying the experience of bathing the baby.
Fuck!
File M for maternal. Maternal denial.
“This is different. It’s nice to enjoy other people’s kids, but you know I’m not in a good place emotionally to be a mother. I am too insecure, and it wouldn’t be fair. Besides, I want you all to myself.” It’s probably not what he wants to hear, but it is the truth.
“Hmmm…” He presses his bare chest into my back and kisses my shoulder. I quiver under his touch, feeling a light tempo beating in my stomach.
“Lucca,” I whisper when I feel his hand slide under my skirt. He strokes between my legs, then cups my sex. “Not in front of the baby, because you’re getting me revved up and core teasing me,” I moan, trying desperately to block out the pleasure he’s showing me.
He groans, then laughs. “Okay, let’s get her out and dried. You ready, wee cheeks?” He trails his hands up and gropes my ass cheeks, teasing me.
Antonia smashes her thick legs in the water, splashing both of us again. Hopefully, that will cool him down. Once she’s out, I dry her on the bed with a big fluffy towel. Then Lucca puts her diaper on and buttons her into her pink romper suit. She rubs her eyes and yawns.
“You change your clothes while I try and settle her,” he says.
When I return from the dressing room in my pink lace lingerie, I admire the most breath-taking sight I’ve ever witnessed. Lucca is lying on his back on the bed still bare chested in his jeans with his legs sprawled out, and Antonia is sleeping across his chest on her front, her face snuggled just below his neck. Lucca has one hand cupping her little bottom, and the other resting on his chest with Antonia’s little chubby fingers curled around his.
Two angels.
Her pale pink romper against Lucca’s deep coloured skin is a pretty picture.
Lucca’s body is so brawny and muscular that Antonia looks like a little light pink feather against him. It’s the sweetest vision I could imagine. It’s doing nothing for my maternal denial. I’ll need to file that thought.
He glances towards me smiling. “Come here,” he whispers.
My heart drums.
Thud.
Thud.
Thud.
I walk to the bed and curl into his side, wrapping my arm around Antonia’s back and across Lucca’s chest. There is something so warm and lovely about this feeling. I close my eyes, enjoying the closeness and intimacy as Lucca kisses the side of my head.
“Lexi, we should put her down.” Lucca’s hot breath against my head causes me to stir as he moves a stray curl from face.
“Did I fall asleep?” I ask, yawning.
“Yes, I have been watching the two of you sleeping on me thinking how lucky I am.”
“How long was I sleeping?”
“Maybe thirty minutes.”
I unhook my leg from his, sitting upright, then lift Antonia from his chest and cradle her into me. She’s in a deep sleep, a heavy weight in my arms as I walk towards the spare room and place her down. Lucca’s body heat presses right against me and his hands splay over my hips.
I lean back into him, moving my head to the side. He kisses my neck softly then trails his hands up and over my breasts, running his finger across the pink lace. My chest is rising with anticipation and my nipples strain against the lace fabric.
“That was a really special moment in there. You have me, Romeo.” I turn around and jump up wrapping my legs around his waist and kissing him desperately. He groans and walks me back into our suite and closes the door, forgetting about our visitors.
I’m his.
He’s mine.
And nothing else matters.
We change our clothes after some quick fondling, check on the baby, then walk downstairs.
Strolling into the downstairs family room, everyone turns around and we get whistles and claps from Savio and Armando. Lucca scowls at them, but I’m sure I hear him roguishly laugh under his breath. I’m mortified and blushing a shade deeper than my pink vest. I tighten my grip on Lucca’s hand.
“You two are supposed to be babysitting, not baby making.” Anna chuckles.
Oh my God.
Please subtract me from this equation. After some banter back and forth, we manage to change the subject, thankfully.
Cameron shakes his head then carries on with his game. Cameron and Emilio are playing against Dominic and A-Jay on some guitar game on the Wii console. Roberta is hanging over Doris putting her dolly’s hairbands on her, telling her she’s her new pony, and Sarah looks like she has relaxed as she hugs a wine glass.
“Thank you, Lexi. I really appreciate it. Is she settled?”
“Yes, she’s fine, out cold. She soaked us with the bath water. That’s why I um … um … changed.” I blush again looking down at my top, I feel like I need to give an explanation and remedy their ideas of what were up to.
“Lexi, we left you a plate of food,” Hazel says. I walk back into the kitchen to heat it up. Lucca follows me, grabbing a beer from the fridge. I sit at the dining area next to the kitchen, and Lucca sets a large glass of wine down in front of me.
Hazel comes and sits next to me with her own wine. “Did you idiots know the baby monitor was on in the spare room?” She laughs, wrapping her arm around my shoulder.
“Oh my God,” I drop my fork, suddenly feeling humiliated all over again.
“I had to stop Roberta from coming up,” she adds.
Fuck! It’s only getting worse.
Lucca leans against the counter, holding his Peroni. “Relax, Lexi. Roberta will not have a clue, and we were only in that room a minute. It’s all clean. They would not have heard us in the suite.”
I take a huge swig of wine, followed by a bite of lasagne, and realise I’ve worked up an appetite. I’m starving and I never ate lunch today either. I know I need to get something in my stomach. The last time I starved myself and drank alcohol, it didn’t go well.
Cameron walks through, very chuffed with himself. “Team Emo, victory,” he announces, fist in the air, then grabs a beer. I don’t make any eye contact. “So you going to tell me why you’re so pissed off at me? What have I done now?” He leans against the kitchen island, flipping his beer cap off.
I ignore him and continue to eat. I know I need to speak to him, but I don’t know how to address it without it sounding too abrupt.
“Lucca called and told me about your argument with Mum. Is that why you’re fuming?” That’s it, the trigger.
“Hmmm, let me see. Mum thinks I’m some sort of gold digger and with Lucca for his money. She doesn’t approve and is disgusted with my behaviour because she says it’s too soon to fall in love, yet she dismisses your man-whore tendencies. But then there's also the fact that my best friend is hurting badly, and the funny thing is that it’s all about you, Cameron. Were you ever going to tell me?
”
He sighs and shrugs his shoulders.
Not good enough.
“It’s not a big deal. Lucy and I had a thing, but I always wanted Rachel deep down. Lucy knows it would never be anything serious, and before you ask, yes, Rachel knows I’ve been with Lucy. I don’t know what the big deal is? Lucy and I had fun, that was it, nothing more, and Rach doesn’t want to settle down with me.” He absently munches on some tortilla chips and salsa.
“Hmmm. It is a big deal, a massive bloody deal, and Rachel, Anna, and Lucy don’t deserve this treatment,” I spurt.
“I’m going to finish with Rach. She wants to go travelling again, and it’s not working. We’re drifting in different directions. Plus, I know she’s not been faithful to me recently; she just hasn’t got the confidence to dump me. I’d be doing her a favour. It’s the right thing to do. She’s been back in touch with that guy from Paris,” he says with certainty, his fingers raking through his hair and musing his waxed shape.
“Well, good. Finally. Do it soon, Cameron, please. I’m supposed to be meeting her for coffee, and I don’t want to feel awkward.” I turn around in my chair and face him.
He walks over to me and wraps his arms around my shoulders. “So are we good?” he asks. I smile because I’m happy he’s finally doing the right thing, but I want him to sweat a little longer.
“I suppose,” I mumble.
“If I speak to Mum for you, will you drop this Lucy thing?” he asks.
“What Lucy thing?” Anna asks as she walks in for some drinks for the kids.
Oh God, this just keeps getting better. He should be doing the right thing and telling Rachel, Anna, and Lucy where they all stand in his screwed-up love triangle thing he has going on.
I take another gulp of wine. I have no intention of telling Anna about Lucy. That’s up to Cameron. “Will you take Doris out for me? I want to spend some time with Kate and Sarah. I’ve barely spoken with them all night,” I say, hoping he takes the hint.
“Sure. Anna, come outside with me. I want to talk to you.” He cocks his head and reaches for her hand. Anna looks nervous. She might be thinking he’s giving her bad news considering he and I were talking a moment ago. Although, Cameron just stares at her and smiles with a look of adoration, and I see Anna relax and return the smile.
He whistles and Doris gallops through, I still haven’t mastered that whistle. Anna takes his hand and follows him. I give him a sympathetic “thank you” smile, thanking him for doing the right thing.
Hazel and I catch up while we’re on our own and she asks if I feel any better about my phone call with my mum. I then decide to discreetly tell her about Leila being charged with breaking and entering and how serious Lucca has taken it.
She listens, intrigued, tapping her middle finger against her chin, then comforts me the way she always does by being understanding and supportive. It prompts me to tell her that the bed is new and it’s a good job too. Then she cracks jokes about it afterwards which makes me laugh.
“Roo, it has taken you years to let one man in your bed, never mind a threesome, bloody hell that would throw you over the edge. And with a chick? If that ever happened, the earth would freeze over.” I almost choke on my wine from laughing that much, watching her raise her eyebrows. She’s right of course, plus the thought of sharing Lucca would destroy me. Typically, I blush and she gives me a cuddle. Then we join the others.
Sitting on the sofa in the family room, Roberta stands behind me and plays with my hair.
“Mummy, when I’m big I want long hair like Aunty Lexi.”
Kate smiles. “Be gentle, Roberta, don’t tug too hard,” she says when she sees my head being yanked backwards.
“Right kids, bedtime,” Savio announces.
“Noooo!” the three of them shout in unison.
“It is bedtime. If you go to bed now, you can go swimming and watch a movie tomorrow.” Savio lowers his voice sternly. They all cheer and jump up.
“I want to sleep in Uncle Lucca’s bed. He has a big castle bed. Mummy, can I?” Roberta pleads.
“Oh, I don’t know. You need to ask Aunty Lexi,” Kate replies cautiously
“Yes, of course you can, but your Uncle Lucca snores.” I say, smiling.
She giggles.
“I do not. Roberta, that is fine, princess. I hope you are not going to snore,” Lucca adds.
“Nah.” She giggles again.
“I’ll go up and get them settled then check on Antonia. Is it okay if they stay upstairs instead of the guest house tonight? Saves lifting them over,” Sarah asks.
“Yes, you can all sleep here. Makes no difference,” Lucca replies.
After everyone has had a goodnight kiss from the kids, and Kate warns the boys to behave and not to go near the top of the stairs, Armando and Sarah take them upstairs to settle them. Lucca fills everyone’s wine glass and grabs beers for the boys then comes and sits on the sofa, pulling me into his lap.
Bliss.
Anna and Cameron return holding hands. They look happy together.
Savio, being the eldest, has been studying Cameron all night. I imagine he is protecting his younger sister and trying to get to know him. Anna was right to be nervous about what her brothers would think.
Everyone is getting on and enjoying their night with lots of various conversations on the go. Armando and Sarah join us again. He slumps down on the sofa and pulls Sarah onto his lap, kissing the side of her head. Sarah thanks me again for helping tonight with the baby. It’s lovely to see her finally relax.
“So what are your plans for the wedding?” Kate asks.
I shrug, not knowing the answer because we haven’t discussed it much or made solid plans. Lucca strokes my arm.
“Mamma has been on the phone. She would like to know a date as she is twitching to get her teeth into it,” Lucca says. Everyone laughs.
“Good luck with that,” Armando adds, rolling his eyes.
“Well, you know I will love to help co-ordinate,” Anna adds.
“We want it stress and drama free, Anna,” Lucca announces, and Kate nearly chokes on her wine as if recalling some of Anna’s past efforts.
“He has a point, Anna,” she says, finding her voice.
“I will have you know I am quite a good planner and have impeccable taste.” She waves her fingers around in the air making her point.
I can sense Lucca rolling his eyes behind me. I feel his body shift and hear him grumble low in his throat.
“You and Mamma are carnage together, Anna, no offense,” Savio adds diplomatically before drinking his beer.
She pouts her lip and looks at Cameron. “I think you would be a great organiser, honey,” he says. I have never heard him call her this before. Maybe they are getting more deeply involved and I’ve not paid much attention.
“Thank you for having faith in me, Cammy. You lot underestimate me,” she chides then blows Cameron an air kiss. He winks at her with that roguish look of his.
“Heads up, Lexi, she had me on constant speed dial before we got married. I had to put an out of office message on my emails because she was hounding me,” Kate says playfully, nudging Anna in the arm.
Sarah nods. “Yep, me too. And it was especially hard for me as I wanted everything simple and plain.” Armando leans over and kisses her forehead in a sweet gesture, as if appreciating her simplicity.
“Admit it, Sarah, it was an amazing day,” Anna retaliates.
“Okay, but it was stressful leading up to it.” Armando nods his head in agreement.
I want to run away to marry Lucca and circumvent all of this drama and stress that’s been mentioned. Do I need more drama in my life? No, definitely not. Hazel saves the day by talking about plans she and Dominic have discussed for their wedding to take focus away from me. I mouth a silent thank you.
We can hear Antonia stirring from the baby monitor and Sarah sighs. “She might need a bottle to settle her down again.”
Armando kisses her head. “I wil
l go and see to her.” Sarah lazily reaches up and kisses him on the lips to thank him. It gives me an idea.
“Armando, why don’t you move the travel cot into the suite and she can sleep with us tonight? Roberta is there anyway, and it will give you two a night to yourselves.”
Armando looks at Sarah for approval, and she smiles at me with big, bright, excited eyes. “Really? That would be great. I can’t remember the last time I slept through the night. Armando, will you give her a bottle and some teething gel and get her settled in the suite?”
“Sure, honey.”
Lucca leans down and kisses my lips chastely. “One of the many reasons why I love you,” he says in his husky voice.
“Give it a rest, you two,” Anna gripes, and Cameron chuckles. He watches her interact with her brothers and I see a sparkle in his brown eyes; he’s admiring her. Oh! … I realise he might actually be falling for her.
After another hour, we all head to bed. I make sure Doris is locked in the family room and switch off the baby monitor. Then Lucca and I check all the doors are locked. After checking on Antonia and Roberta, we go into the bathroom, shower quickly and quietly, then dress in modest nightwear and quietly slip into bed. I move Roberta over, leaning on my side and snuggling into Lucca.
He kisses my head, nose, cheeks, and lips. “Have I told you lately that I love you?”
“Yes, I love you too. Thank you for everything today,” I whisper.
“Thank you for being you and so goddamn special to me,” he whispers back, then I allow my head to rest on his chest and fall off to sleep.
Chapter 12
I’m sorry
“Mummy, when I’m a big girl will I have long hair like you?” I ask, sitting cross-legged on the ground of our shed waiting for Mummy to do my hair.