by Rosie Scott
I'd given up all hope of speaking with her until class was dismissed. I took longer than normal to gather my things, hoping she would say something or I'd find the courage to.
“Cerin.” Kai's voice cracked. She was the last student in a chair like she never planned on leaving. Her golden eyes were on my stack of belongings as she asked, “Can I speak to you?”
My eyes suddenly burned. The desperate turmoil so thickly entwined with her voice leaked out and affected me. “Of course,” I agreed immediately.
“I apologize if you had plans, but...” Kai trailed off and stared blankly at the wall. “I have no one to talk to.”
It was the second time I'd experience heartbreak. “You have me,” I offered.
She nodded shakily and glanced up, managing a smile. “Thank you.”
Kai led me through the university's western royal halls until we exited a door onto Sera's highest wall. My breath caught at the view. From here, the city descended the mountain in waves of polished stone and crowds of tourists, and the expansive plains south of Sera shimmered with a light breeze. The Seran Forest was a good distance to the east, but we could see it from this height as a smudge of deep green near the horizon.
The view became even better after Kai led me inside a watchtower between two sections of the wall that stretched up toward the lowest clouds. A few Seran guards noted our presence with curiosity, but they said nothing when they recognized Kai. As horribly as her father treated her, it seemed her royal position granted her some benefits. I wondered if her status made it easier to get alcohol for her habit.
Kai and I stood on the top floor of the keep, looking out over her father's lands. She was quiet for sometime before turning to the north and pointing. I followed her finger until I saw the faintest glimmer of the rolling Servis Ocean.
“You can see the ocean from here,” Kai murmured. “I thought you'd appreciate that since you came from Thornwell. Do you miss home?”
I couldn't believe Kai remembered me telling her that. Her interest in me was far greater than I ever gave her credit for. “I miss Thornwell,” I admitted. “I miss waking up to the smell of salt and I miss fishing with my parents. But Sera has its merits.” As I said it, my eyes traveled longingly over the waves of her fiery hair. When she turned to meet my gaze, I looked away.
“Do your parents love you?” she asked.
An ache clenched my heart. “Yes.”
“Good.”
I thought of a million things to say before I decided on, “You are an anomaly, Kai.”
“Yes,” she agreed softly, staring unceasingly at the ocean. “It is a death sentence.”
I swallowed hard. “Why?”
“You are a mage, Cerin. You know the Kilgorian Law. Once all environmental energy reserves run out, you use your own life force to summon magic. Dual casters live shorter lives than those who wield a single element, and mages live shorter lives than non-mages. I am human. I already have a puny lifespan of what, eighty years? If I'm lucky?” Kai laughed humorlessly, but she continued staring at the ocean. “Because I can wield all elements, I might as well prepare my eulogy now.”
I hadn't thought of that aspect before. My personal focus on death magic meant I no longer feared the health detriments of wielding magic because necromantic leeching could reverse its effects. Kai's fear for her lifespan stuck out to me like a problem that needed solving.
“You said...” I trailed off, working up the courage. As unfazed as Kai seemed by the idea of necromancy in the past, it was still a risky subject to broach. “You wield all elements.”
“Yes.”
“Including death?”
Kai hesitated. “I have the ability to, yes. But don't think that means I am a necromancer. Death magic is banned. My father has a distinct hatred for all who wield it. Necromancers aren't given a trial. They're simply executed.”
“Then how do you know you can wield it?” I inquired.
Kai glanced over at me with hesitation. “I don't really wish to say.”
“Okay,” I murmured. After another burst of courage, I blurted, “If your father legalized necromancy, you could wield it freely. Leeching would lengthen your lifespan.”
Kai was quiet for so long that I glanced over to check on her. A million different thoughts and ideas ran through her eyes. Hope welled in my chest, for she seemed to latch onto the idea. Given her usual open-mindedness, it felt safe to talk about with her.
Finally, her eyes dulled again. “My father would rather me die young than relax his laws,” she murmured. “In a way, I should consider this new development a relief. I have no life here. I thirst for warfare, but using my abilities will kill me and I have no other skills. Father reminds me of this every chance he gets.” Kai huffed humorlessly. “I love irony. I am the first mage to have access to the six elements, yet I can't wield them without killing myself. It's like fate is trying to convince me to finally commit suicide because my father's prodding hasn't worked.”
“You have things to live for,” I protested, alarmed by her talk of suicide. “As awful as life can get, there are always ways forward.”
“Can you see the future?” Kai questioned, leaning her head on her arms over the battlement and staring at me.
“No.”
“Then how do you know?”
My mind scrambled for words. “Because the strongest people persevere,” I replied, “and every time I'm around you without your father, you exude strength and confidence. You carry yourself with such intelligence and self-assurance that people everywhere notice and are intimidated, Kai. I can't see the future. I don't know where you'll go or what you'll do. But regardless, I do know that you'll be great at it.”
Kai sobered at my compliments, but she didn't pull her gaze away. “For years I hoped I could prove this to my father by rising to be the best battlemage in his army,” she murmured. “The best form of revenge is success.”
“There are many roads to that success,” I pointed out.
She sighed. “Yes.” Kai stood up once more, pulling her hair to the opposite shoulder until her slender neck teased me with glimpses of its beauty. “You are easy to talk to, Cerin. Now that I know what it's like to have a friend, I don't want to lose you.”
A dull ache spread through my gut. Kai had called me her only friend before, but this time she wasn't drunk.
“You are very blunt,” I replied.
Kai chuckled softly and smiled mischievously at me. “Does that bother you?”
“No. I find it refreshing and appealing.” When her smile brightened, I felt a surge of attraction and blurted, “Your father's an idiot.”
Kai laughed and said, “See, this is why I like you. You bombard me with compliments and my father with insults.” She leaned on the battlement with her forearms again. “I will tell you something few people know since we're friends. Sirius is not my biological father.”
No wonder they looked nothing alike. “Where are your parents?”
“I don't know,” Kai replied. “I was dropped off here as an infant like they knew I would have magical skill. That's why Sirius took me in. Terran and I have thrown theories around over the years about my heritage, but we've figured nothing out. Whenever I go to the inner city, I keep a lookout for golden eyes like I'll actually find my parents close by. I've never seen eyes like mine on anyone else. Terran says the same, and he's been to other settlements.”
“I'd never seen golden eyes before yours, either,” I admitted softly.
“Then I suppose I can cross Thornwell off the list of places to look,” she replied with a smile.
“If you find your biological parents, perhaps you could understand why you have the powers you do,” I suggested.
“You are just full of ideas,” Kai teased.
“I'm trying to help you.”
“I know.” Kai's bright smile faded into one of appreciation. “Thank you.” After a quiet moment, she added hesitantly, “I felt drawn to you, Cerin, ever since you came he
re three years ago. I recognized the loneliness surrounding you because I feel it every day. The closer we get, the more I want to know about you and share things with you.” Her cheeks reddened as she realized just how much she'd revealed to me before she concluded, “I just want you to know that you can talk to me. Like you understand my troubles despite having your own, I want to know about and help you with yours.”
That was the exact moment I fell in love with Kai Sera. The logical side of my brain protested it would ruin me, for she would die young because her royal father refused to consider the merits of necromancy; yet here I was, a necromancer who fell dangerously and hopelessly in love with her. It wasn't meant to be, but my heart spit curses at fate and loved her anyway.
Even so, I did not dare tell her my secrets of practicing necromancy. If Kai was destined to die young, I didn't want her to die viewing me as an enemy. After knowing nothing but loneliness, I wished for the only friend I'd ever had to live out her short life thinking of me fondly.
Six
79th of Dark Star, 410
Cerin—
Meet me in the library come nightfall on the eve of the new year if you have no other plans. I apologize for being so busy with all my classes, but I'd like to make it up to you. The stars are most beautiful while viewing them from the northeastern wall. I want to celebrate the new year with you and take you out for a night on the town. Most shops and restaurants are open all night for the holiday. We'll stay out as late as possible if you can keep awake for it!
I hope to see you there. If you don't show, I'll understand. But I'll miss you.
-Kai
I read and reread the note Kai slipped to me in the hallway earlier that day, a nervous anticipation in my chest. I still had no friends other than her, and we didn't see each other as often as I would have liked. Kai was overwhelmed with classes, for Sirius insisted on training her in all five legal elements despite the probable fatal ramifications. I shared no classes with her anymore, and the only times we saw one another were when we'd run across each other in the library. It seemed Kai came there whenever she had a spare moment. I liked to believe it was because I was often there.
I read Kai's note again just to convince myself it was real. The new year wouldn't come for another eleven days, yet just the prospect of spending it with her turned me into a nervous wreck. Even though we'd been friends for nearly a year, Kai still didn't know I pined for her. A mixture of youthful cowardice and fear of her succumbing to an early death kept me reserved in her presence. Internally, however, I felt insane with loneliness. I had so many secrets I wanted to share with her, some of which I'd never be able to. I tried to feel better about it by reminding myself that no matter the secrets between us, I had Kai's attention. I may have been an outcast subject to scorn by most Serans, but when holding this note that she'd addressed to me, I felt like the luckiest person in the world.
Tap. Tap. Tap-tap. Tap.
The rat skeleton shuffled around the floor of my room, each tiny step making soft music as bone tapped on wood. It pulled me out of my pensive trance, and I folded up Kai's note and put it in my trouser pocket for safe-keeping. Over half a year after first discovering the rat corpse in my closet, all flesh and tissue had dissipated and left nothing but bone. I'd long ago tested every magical curiosity I had with and on the creature. I couldn't leech from my minions, for the dead didn't generate energy like the living. I couldn't heal them. But I could shield them, and my thoughts could affect them in battle.
I revived the rat repeatedly because despite knowing otherwise, it felt like having a pet. When it fell too late to see in the library, I'd revive the rat and play with it. It could retrieve thrown objects and do little dances, and sometimes I allowed it to roam my room freely while I studied. Corpses couldn't speak, but they made better company than most of my peers.
A low murmur sounded out behind me, but when I glanced at my door, nothing happened. I waited a few moments in case a student tried to scare me by banging on the door as a prank, but the noise never came.
I left the rat to its freedom and stood, pulling out a pack of matches from the top drawer of my desk and lighting the lamps in the room one at a time. Circles of firelight flickered over stone walls, making up for the ever-darkening evening skies.
Crr-ching!
I frowned and glanced toward the door at the unmistakable ring of a key in a lock. It was likely one of the other rooms, for the loud locking mechanisms could echo in these stone halls—
My heart skipped a beat as my door opened, its widening arc chased by infiltrating light from the outside hallway. A professor I recognized but couldn't name peered in without any warning, the key to my door in his hand. Behind him in the hallway stood Kenady and one of his mindless sidekicks. Kenady glared at me with a cruel look of satisfaction that claimed proud responsibility for my current ails and inevitable exile. He'd clearly reported me. Based on the whispering I'd heard at my door I assumed he and his friend saw something through my keyhole or a crack that was just a little too wide. Panic seized my chest. Excuses and plans came to mind, but I froze and did nothing.
The professor's eyes found me, then traveled over my bed to the floor. Remembering I'd left the rat animated, my eyes widened as I searched for it. The small skeleton waddled over to the corner within the professor's view and sat down with a tiny clink of bone on wood.
I dispelled the necromancy without a word, and the rat's bones collapsed into a disorganized pile. That ended up being the catalyst to a series of unfortunate events.
The professor stumbled back out of the room like he'd witnessed a murder. “Students!” he commanded, turning to Kenady and his friend in the hallway. “Get to your rooms and lock the door. Do not come out until morning.” Turning to a passing employee who appeared curious by the ruckus, he added, “Get the headmaster!”
Death magic is banned. My father has a distinct hatred for all who wield it. Necromancers aren't given a trial. They're simply executed. Kai's words floated into the forefront of my mind as I tried to decide what to do, giving me advice and wisdom. She knew her father better than any of us, for she often suffered on his account. I could not reason with the unreasonable.
So I ran. I was fully dressed, and the only thing I could think of to grab was the tiny stack of letters to my parents from the desk. I shoved them into a trouser pocket with Kai's note and left the rest of my gold, books, and belongings, rushing out of the room as the professor screamed after me.
The jingling of my boot buckles echoed off stone walls as I pushed aside university employees and hopped down sections of steps at a time, my mind set on the giant front doors which would be my redemption. Calls for guards to stop me came from multiple voices and directions. Pounding boot steps to match the ferocity of my own multiplied as the group of my pursuers grew.
I will not die here. It repeated in my head like a chant, like thinking it would make it true. I thought of Thornwell and my parents, and I told myself I refused to die until I saw them again.
The multi-story front doors of the university were just ahead, but my pursuers were gaining. My tall height gave me a naturally longer gait, but I wasn't physically fit. Spending time in a classroom for years practicing magic wasn't ideal for gaining muscle.
The Seran University's entrance hall had a giant fireplace that many gathered around to wait for the disappointment of finding out they couldn't afford its services. We were amid the coldest season of Dark Star, so many waited beside it now soaking up its heat. But fires required constant oxygen flow, and as the long, emerald green drape hanging over a nearby window waved into the hall from a cold outdoor breeze, I realized how they fueled it. Instead of rushing to the heavy doors to flee, I abruptly dodged left, shoving the curtain to the side and hopping up onto the windowsill.
The casement window was longer than it was wide, but my half-Icilic blood kept me thin. I turned to the side and pushed between the glass and frame, sucking in my stomach as I pleaded for it to work.
Pfft! With a final jerk to the outside, the window frame rubbed harshly against my forearm, leaving a friction burn but letting me free. I fell from the window and to the cobblestone below. The epidermis of my right forearm peeled from the burn, revealing the pinker layer beneath. I waited to heal it, scrambling up on the stone before the nearby guards could understand why the hell a thin pale student climbed out of a window without being dressed for the weather.
Just after passing the wall separating the university's courtyard from the middle tier of Sera, the giant doors creaked behind me before a hoarse male voice called, “By order of Sirius Sera! Stop or you will be executed!”
You'll execute me regardless. I kept running, my lungs scorching holes in my sides as evening passersby backed out of my way, startled by my frantic pace while they tried to figure out my crime.
“Prepare the Orders of the Mages!” It was a cry on another voice far behind me. “A necromancer's on the loose!”
The crowds I pushed through gasped and dispersed at the dreaded word, pulling back from the street like the air around me was toxic. Slams of doors reverberated off stone as people retreated inside. The main street descended ever downward, the smooth cobblestone glistening silver in the moonlight of the encroaching night. Each step I took was closer to safety.
Shik!
The ground rushed up with a rude greeting, and my forehead hit stone. The resulting headache was so biting that I only realized someone had shot me when I turned to the side and the shaft of an arrow stuck out of my right calf. A handful of soldiers jogged down the street from the university, and the one with the bow raised it again.
Sheel a phisica. I thrust a hand out, life magic glowing over the palm.
Zwip.
A glimmering transparent white egg-shaped magical force surrounded me, and when the second arrow meant for my eye zipped near, it bounced off harmlessly and rolled into a nearby crack between stone. The soldiers hesitated as they noticed the life magic, so I pulled out the arrow, hissing under my breath at the stinging pain as I healed the wound. As the white magic sunk past broken flesh and into muscle, slowly melding it back into place, the soldiers voiced their confusion.