I dreaded the first day for fear that she was right. I was prepared for things to be different, but they weren’t. He ignored all the girls that flirted with him and told me he only had eyes for me. It didn’t take long for me to fall in love with him. He was easy to love.
I look around my dark and quiet hotel room and realize that I’m alone in every sense of the word. Peyton doesn’t want to talk to me and Elle is having no problem finding a way for Harrison to fit into her life. My happy little family is slipping through my fingers.
Everything in my life is changing and there isn’t a thing I can do to stop it.
WALKING through the gates, I stop and take in the surroundings with Peyton and Elle holding my hands. I pull them closer without being obvious. They don’t know how important it is that we are standing here. Mason should’ve been here with us. We had this planned out – a gift for their sixth birthday – we had started saving everything we could. We were going to make this happen, together, and now here I am with our girls and standing in front of me is a man who, I have a feeling, would move into the role of dad without hesitation, if given the chance.
The girls and I walk forward. Elle lets go of my hand and walks right up to Harrison. I try not to show any emotion when she slips her hand into his. Quinn doesn’t seem to care, so why should I? Peyton lets go next, leaving me to stand awkwardly in the middle of the entrance to Disney World by myself. Josie shoves me lightly when she walks by. I want to kick her. Tackle her to the ground like I did when we were in kindergarten. Childish, yes, but the look in her eyes tells me enough. She knows Harrison is watching me. I know it too because I can feel his eyes on me, even if they are covered by dark glasses.
Harrison steps forward and onto the path that will lead us to the most magical place on earth. I check on Peyton, who is firmly attached to Liam’s hand, just as Elle is with Harrison. He looks back at me, clearly waiting for me to follow. He doesn’t need words, it’s like I can read him already.
Two bodyguards with two more in front of Liam flank me. If it were just the guys out today, we wouldn’t need them, but with the kids out, the security is required. The guys also don’t want to sign autographs today, which is understandable. Jimmy comes up behind me and puts his arm around my shoulders. It doesn’t escape my attention that Harrison’s already somber expression turns even bleaker.
It’s nice to be out as one big family. People stare and point, no doubt recognizing the guys, but they ignore them. This is our day; a day to be away from our jobs and their public life and to give the kids some fun.
Jimmy runs ahead and scoops Peyton up, throwing her over his shoulder. She laughs, and the sound brings tears to my eyes. Harrison slows down and walks next to me with Elle on his other side. She hasn’t let go of his hand, nor has she stopped talking, and Harrison hasn’t missed a word, even though he’s looking at me every few seconds.
It’s only a matter of minutes before my camera is out and both girls are wrapped in Mickey Mouse’s embrace. Noah jokes that Mickey is for babies, earning an ear flick from Liam.
“Go stand with the girls, I’ll take your picture.” His warm hand covers mine. His lips are dangerously close to the ear. My tongue is thick, no words willing to form as I hand him the camera and walk over to my girls. I bring them both into my arms, kissing them both on their cheeks before posing for what will surely be our Christmas card. We didn’t send one out last Christmas, so maybe we’ll do it this year.
“Thank you,” I say when Harrison shows me the picture. He stands next to me, his chest pressed against my shoulder. I should step back and remind him that we can never be anything more than co-workers, but doing that might be rude and presumptuous. He’s just being nice right now.
Jimmy, I’ve determined, is the biggest kid of all of them. He races the boys and Peyton to the lines so they can start riding, even though it clearly says no running. I’ve never been one for rides, so I’ve gladly accepted the photographer role.
I’m surprised when Harrison appears. I thought for sure he’d be with Quinn. For a brief moment I worry about Elle, but remember that Liam and Josie are there and neither of them would let anything happen to her. Harrison stands next me, his body brushing up against mine. Today he’s wearing a baseball cap and it’s starting to bug the shit out of me.
I try to adjust my body so that we aren’t touching, but fail in my attempt and end up creating just enough friction to cause the hairs on my arms to rise. If he notices, he doesn’t say anything and for that I’m thankful.
“Do you want to talk about what happened?”
I shake my head. “It was a mistake.”
Harrison sighs. He hangs his head and turns slightly to look at me. “It didn’t feel like one to me.”
I don’t have an answer and I think that upsets him. I look down at the manicured garden in front of me, fearful of seeing his expression. My eyes start to water and for what? Nothing can happen between us, he knows this.
We hustle from ride to ride and even though I’m not riding them, I’m exhausted from the stories that Peyton and Elle are telling me. Peyton is having a blast. Seeing her smile gives me hope that she’s turning the corner in her mourning. Not that she needs to be rushed, but I miss my little girl.
“Mommy, I’m tired.” Elle pulls on my t-shirt to get my attention. We’re in one of the many gift shops looking at souvenirs. It’s also a great place to cool down from the beating sun.
“Are you ready to go back to the hotel?”
“No, can you carry me?”
“Elle, there’s no way I can carry you. You’re too big.”
Elle leans against me, grinding her face into my side. This is typical Elle – she’s the child that loves to nap – whereas, Peyton can go all day. I play with her ponytail, contemplating what to do with her. I don’t want to ruin her day, but carrying her is out of the question.
“Excuse me, where can I rent a wagon?” I ask the clerk behind the counter.
“What do you need a wagon for?” I turn to find Harrison behind me. He gazes down at me. His eyes are soft and forgiving, showing no mention of our earlier conversation.
“Elle’s tired. I can’t carry her, so I need something to put her in or we need to go back to the hotel.”
Harrison nods. He bends over and says something to Elle before he picks her up from behind and places her on his shoulder. Her face beams as she steadies herself.
“We won’t be needing the wagon,” he says to the clerk who shrugs. I stand there stone-faced as he walks out of the store, ducking when they get to the entrance, with my baby on his shoulders.
“Hey, is that Harrison James?”
“No,” I say as I leave.
“Harrison?” he stops and faces me. His sunglasses are covering his eyes again and it makes me wonder if Elle did that for him. “You don’t have to carry her, she can walk.”
Harrison looks up at Elle while she looks down at him. They smile at each other as if they are sharing their own secrets. “Princess Elle, I’m your Henchman, what say you?”
I smile and laugh at the way Harrison is talking to her.
“Take me to my palace and I shall feed you for the night,” Elle says in her princess voice. Good lord, he fell right into her game.
“We’re good, Queen Katelyn.” Harrison winks as they walk off. He starts to gallop, giving us all the sound of laughter. I seek out Peyton, wondering if she’s jealous. If she is, she’s not showing it. Between Jimmy and Liam, I think they have her missing piece filled nicely as well.
“Looks like I’m by myself,” I say to no one.
“I’ll walk with you.”
Next to me is mini-Harrison, just a bit cuter.
“Thanks, Quinn.”
“It’s okay.”
We catch up with the henchman and his princess just in time for my stomach to growl.
“Harrison, are you ready for lunch?” I stop dead in my tracks when the words are out of my mouth. I try to look away, but I can’t
. He’s trying not to smile, but to no avail. There’s no use in trying to play it off as something as innocent as lunch, he’s caught the meaning. I don’t want him thinking that I’m even remotely close to taking a step with him because I’m not. It’s lunch. Nothing more.
“There’s a restaurant on the other side of the palace. We can go there.”
“I’ll tell the others and meet you there.”
Harrison nods and tells Quinn to go with him. I watch as he walks away with Elle on his shoulders and his son holding his hand like this is something they do every day. He didn’t think twice about helping Elle and that scares me. I don’t want her attached to someone who isn’t going to be around later. It’s not good for her and it’s definitely not good for Peyton. They need stability.
I let everyone know where we are going and they all agree to meet us there. Peyton and I walk hand in hand through the Palace toward the restaurant.
“Are you having fun?” I ask, hoping for the best.
“I am.”
“Yeah, Quinn’s been here before. It’s nice to hang out with someone who knows their way around, isn’t it?”
“Yeah. Can we come back again some day?”
“Of course. I like it here. It’s magical.”
Peyton laughs and shakes her head. “You’re a dork, mom.” I may have been insulted, but getting her to laugh is worth it in my book.
We walk in and find the rest of our party waiting for us at a table that sits five. Even though Peyton hasn’t been around us much today, he thought ahead and planned for her to have lunch with us. Who does that?
LUNCH is a quiet affair with Quinn, Elle and Peyton teasing me about not going on any rides. I’m adamant that I’m fine taking pictures of everyone, but they aren’t buying it. Quinn calls me chicken and Peyton adds the noises to go with it.
“Let’s go on a ride together,” Harrison suggests. I shake my head rapidly, expressing a giant no thanks. I like to keep my feet firmly planted on the ground.
“Yeah, we’re going on a ride.” Harrison pulls my hand into his, with his other hand attached to Elle’s who is holding Peyton’s who’s attached to Quinn. We’re a train.
“Are you kidding me?” I ask when we stop in front of the haunted mansion. “No way.”
“It’s a kid ride with dancing ghosts. The most harmless ride out there.”
“There’s no one to watch the kids,” I reply, letting go of his hand. I place my hands on my hips for good measure to show him I mean business. This is my mom stance, which makes him laugh. I roll my eyes and throw my hands up in the air.
“Liam and Josie are right there, plus the bodyguards are here. Let me take you on this ride.” Harrison sticks out his bottom lip and bats his eyes. I thought only women and a set of twins did this. The kids are jumping up and down clapping their hands begging me to go.
“It’s not scary?”
“Not at all. Quinn rode it when he was four.”
“Dad’s right. It’s a dumb ride, to be honest.”
“Fine.” I relent and follow Harrison in line. Thankfully, it’s short and we don’t have to wait too long. Once we are in the seat and buckled in, I regret it immediately. I hate ghost and horror stories.
“I can’t do this.” My hands start to push on the bar holding me in.
“What are you talking about?”
“This, I can’t ride.” Our car starts to jerk forward, leaving me with no way out. We enter a dark tunnel and something brushes against me. I scream and clutch onto Harrison’s arms, my fingers digging into his flesh. We round a corner and pause to watch ghost perform a dance for us.
“Want me to distract you?”
“How on earth are you going to do that?”
Harrison shrugs and turns his baseball cap around. His lips are on mine before I can take my next breath. As the car moves, jerking us back and forth, his tongue glides against mine in a relaxed state. My hand cups his cheek and my fingers play along his jaw, rubbing the scruff that has grown since his last shave.
His arm wraps around me, protecting me from whatever lurks in the dark. He pulls away slightly, only to bite my lower lip before going back to my mouth. My lips tingle with desire, yearning for more even though this shouldn’t be happening. My body curves to into his like it’s meant to be there. I should be scared, but I’m lost in the way his mouth moves against mine, bringing out new sensations that I didn’t know existed. My body sighs, urging him on. I shift so I’m closer, leaving no gap between us. People scream around us and that only spurs him deeper into this kiss. It’s not urgent, but soft and tantalizing. I could spend days like this and not need to breathe or even move from this position.
Harrison kisses down my jaw. I let out a little squeak showing him my displeasure of him leaving my now swollen lips. I know I’ll have red lips from razor burn, but at the moment I’m going to welcome them. He pulls at my top lip, whispering my name as he does. His lust filled voice makes my toes curl and I want to demand more. I want to stand-up and tell him I need more, but I’m too lost in my own head to let that happen. He’s distracting me like he said he would.
I almost cry out when he pulls away. He sits forward and pulls my hand into his. He links his fingers with mine and sets our hands down between us on the bench. No one can see the connection we are sharing at this moment. I can’t see it either, but I can feel it. Our bodies are in tune with one another. Mine wants his to touch me, to feel him pressed up against me in the most intimate way. My skin, it feels scorched from his touch. How can a simple kiss make me feel like this? When the ride stops, he gives my fingers a squeeze before helping me out of the car.
My steps are shaky. He puts his arm around my waist, steadying me. His lips brush against my ear. I feel like my skin is about to catch fire. “I hope you enjoyed the ride.” He steps away and waits for me to lead the way out.
“How was it?” Both girls ask at the same time.
“It was great,” I say and that’s not a lie. What I felt in there, what I’ve been feeling since earlier this morning… no man should be able to elicit those types of feelings from me. They are only for Mason, whether he’s here or not.
WALKING down the ramp from the Haunted Mansion, I try to eliminate the big ass grin that has taken over my face. Taking Katelyn on this ride was a total ploy because I wanted a chance to hold her and knew by listening to her talk that this would be the perfect opportunity. But making out with her twice, within a ten-hour span, definitely ranks high on my list of accomplishments. After she left my room in the early hours of the morning, I thought her walls would be up. That she’d be closed off and attached to Josie all day. So, when she started walking with me – when she would touch me without thinking about it – I knew she was letting her feelings come through.
I don’t know if she realized what she was doing. She’d brush her hand down my side after giving Elle water or the she’d grab my shirt to change my direction. I caught every single moment. These weren’t friendly gestures, at least not in my book. Most important, though, was the way she asked if I was hungry and that was the only time I couldn’t hide my reaction. She knew I caught the underlying meaning and I tried to play it off for her sake, but inside I was rejoicing.
I purposely chose a table that sat five. I wanted to see what we’d look like as a family and the picture in front of me was one any man would be proud of. Now that I’ve seen it, I want this even more.
Liam is standing at the exit when I come around the corner. I look over at Katelyn, who is now back to completely ignoring me, fucking perfect. I reach for my sunglasses and realize that I had turned my baseball hat backwards. I’m damn lucky that I didn’t lose them on the ride. Not that it would’ve mattered, kissing her is so worth the cost of replacing them. I turn my hat around and stop in front of Liam who’s watching Katelyn as she walks by and up to Josie and the kids.
“What’s with her?”
“She got scared.”
Liam laughs. “I can’t believe she
even went in there. Mason could never get her on a ride during the fair. He tried enough times though.”
“Yeah, it was fun,” I say, rubbing my cap back and forth.
Liam and I walk behind the girls. Noah and Quinn are a few steps ahead of them. Josie is holding Elle’s hand and Katelyn has Peyton. The picture from earlier – the five us – holding hands like a family sticks in my mind. No one balked. Not even Peyton, who I thought for sure, would refuse to be silly. It felt good to be like that.
“Are you serious about her?”
My steps falter with Liam’s questioning. We’ve never discussed women before, except for Quinn’s oven, but he knows that I’m interested in Katelyn. I’ve not exactly hidden how I feel.
“I am,” I reply confidently.
“How serious?”
This time, I stop so I can look him in the eye. I know I don’t have to answer to him, she has parents for that, but he’s her friend and he’s fiercely protective of those he loves. “For a brief moment today, I saw us as a family and it didn’t scare me, it made me happy.”
“You can’t dick her around. She’s not one of those that you can date for a few months and push aside when you’re bored.”
“Where the hell is this coming from?” I scoff. “You’ve known since the moment I met her that I wanted to be something… anything to her. I haven’t been with anyone since the night I was blessed with shaking her hand.” I shake my head. “Fuck, man, seriously? You think I’m going stick my dick in her and bail? Why, because she has two kids, or because she’s still dealing with losing her husband? Or, because every time I think we are getting close, she fucking shuts me out?” I stuff my hands in my pocket and kick a pebble on the ground. I thought I’d made my intentions pretty clear, but apparently not.
My Unexpected Forever Page 8