by Jin Yong
Linghu Chong’s wound did hurt pretty badly. If it were any other time, he would never admit it. But now he had an idea. “I’ll have to do such and such to get her smiling again.” He scowled and let out several snorts.
Yilin was very concerned. “Hopefully it won’t…won’t start bleeding again,” she murmured.
She felt his forehead with her hand and was pleased to find that he didn’t have a fever. After a few moments, she asked gently, “Are you feeling a bit better?”
“Still hurts badly,” Linghu Chong said.
Yilin pulled a long face and had no idea what to do.
“Wow, it hurts! I wish sixth…sixth apprentice brother were here,” Linghu Chong muttered.
“Why? He has special painkillers?” Yilin asked.
“Yeah! His mouth is the painkiller. I’ve been wounded pretty badly before, and was in terrible pain. Sixth apprentice brother is really good at telling jokes. When I listen to his jokes and laugh at them, I forget about the pain from my wounds completely. I really wish he were here. Ouch…woo…it really hurts…ou…ouch!”
Yilin felt that she was in an awkward position. People under Master Dingyi wore a solemn face everyday while reading Buddhist scriptures, praying to Buddha, and practicing martial arts. It was very rare in the White-Cloud Nunnery to actually hear any laughter. For her to tell a joke was almost against her nature. She thought, “Apprentice brother Lu Dayou is not here, and Big Brother Linghu wants to hear some jokes, I guess I’ll have to tell the jokes, but…but…I don’t know any jokes.” A sudden idea popped into her head and she remembered something.
“Big Brother Linghu, I don’t know how to tell jokes, but I’ve read a book of scripture in our Scripture Room that seemed to be interesting. It’s called the ‘Scripture of Hundred Parables.’ Have you read it before?”
Linghu Chong shook his head. “Nope. I never read any books, especially Buddhist scriptures.”
Yilin blushed slightly. “I am so stupid to ask such a foolish question. You are not a Buddhist; of course you don’t read Buddhist Scriptures.” She paused and then went on, “The book ‘Scripture of Hundred Parables’ was written by a great Indian monk named Gazena. There are many interesting stories in the book.”
“Great! I love interesting stories. Tell me some!” Linghu Chong encouraged her.
Yilin smiled as countless of stories flashed through her memory. “Ok, let me tell you the parable of the ‘Plough Breaking Head.’ A long time ago, there was this bald headed man. He was naturally bald, and didn’t have a single hair on his head. For some reason, he got into an argument with a farmer. The farmer had a plough in his hands, so he took the plough and struck the bald man’s head. That blow broke the skin of the man’s head and it started bleeding, but the bald man only laughed and took the abuse without dodging. Bystanders felt it very strange and asked him why he didn’t dodge the attack but rather laughed at it. The bald man said with a big smile, ‘That farmer is so dumb that when he did not find any hair on my head, he thought it was a rock, and then proceeded to use his plough to break the rock. If I dodged, wouldn’t I be agreeing that he was the smart one?’”
Linghu Chong burst into loud laughter. “Wonderful story!” he exclaimed. “That bald man was a real character! Even if he has to lose his life taking a beating, he shouldn’t budge.”
Seeing Linghu Chong’s happy face, Yilin felt great contentment. “Let me tell you another one called the parable of the ‘Doctor Making Princess Grow Up’,” she said. “Once upon a time, a king had a daughter. The king was a very impatient man. Seeing that the princess was just a little baby, he really wanted her to grow up fast. One day, he called upon the royal doctor and ordered him to make a special kind of medicine for the princess, so that when the princess took the medicine, she would grow up immediately. The royal doctor said, ‘It is possible to make such special medicine, but to collect all the ingredients and to refine them would require a lot of work. Please let me take the princess home and work on the medicine immediately. I will try to get it done as fast as I can, but your majesty cannot press me.’ The king said, ‘Fine, I won’t press you.’ The royal doctor carried the princess back to his own home and then started reporting to the king everyday that he was working on getting the ingredients and refining them. Twelve years went by. The royal doctor then reported to the king, ‘I have finished making the special medicine and the princess took the medicine today.’ He brought the princess to the king. The king was very pleased to see that the little baby had grown into a slim and graceful young girl. He praised the royal doctor’s excellent skills since right after taking the special medicine his daughter did grow up. So he granted him great quantities of gold and jewels.”
Linghu Chong burst into loud laughter again. “You said the king was an impatient man,” he said, “but he was actually not impatient at all. Didn’t he wait twelve years? If I were the royal doctor, I would only need one day to change the baby princess into a seventeen year old slim and graceful young girl.”
Yilin stared at Linghu Chong with her eyes wide open. “How would you manage that?” she asked.
Linghu Chong grinned. “Apply ‘Heavenly Connecting Glue’ dressing outside and take ‘White Cloud Bear Gallbladder Pills’ inside.”
“Those are medicines for cuts and bruises, how can they make one grow taller and older?” Yilin asked, laughing.
“That’s right. After I carry the baby princess back home, I’d get four tailors….”
“Why would you get four tailors?” Yilin was even more confused.
“For making new dresses, of course.” Linghu Chong replied. “I’d have them measure your size and make a set of royal gowns the same night. The second morning, after you put them on, with an exquisite phoenix coronet on your head, a silk skirt with a hundred flower patterns, and a pair of slippers embroidered with golden thread and decorated with pearls on your feet, you can gracefully walk into the palace. First you call his majesty three times, then bow down to salute while saying, ‘My royal father, after I took the royal doctor Linghu Chong’s magical medicine, I grew up in one single night.’ When the king sees such a beautiful and lovely princess, he will burst with so much joy that he would never bother to check if you were real or not. Then, I, the royal doctor Linghu Chong, would of course get a handsome reward!”
Yilin giggled uncontrollably while listening to Linghu Chong. When he finally finished, she laughed so hard that she had to bend down and could not straighten herself up. After laughing for a long while, she said, “You are definitely smarter than the royal doctor in the ‘Scripture of the Hundred Parables.’ Too bad that I…I am so ugly, and don’t look like a princess at all.”
“If you are ugly, then there is nobody who could call themselves pretty in this world. In all the ages, there must have been tens of thousands of princesses, but none can compare with you,” Linghu Chong said.
Yilin was overjoyed to hear him complimenting her so earnestly. “Did you meet all those tens of thousands of princesses?” she asked with a smile.
“Of course! I checked them out one by one in my dreams,” Linghu Chong said.
“Hey, why do you always dream about princesses?” Yilin grinned.
Linghu Chong chuckled and said, “When one thinks too much….” He suddenly remembered that Yilin was only an innocent and artless young nun. By joking with him, she had already violated her vows, how could he still carry on with her without any consideration? When he thought of that, he immediately became serious and faked a yawn.
“Ah, Big Brother Linghu, you must be tired. You should close your eyes and nap for a while,” Yilin said.
“Yes! Your jokes really worked magic. My wounds are not hurting anymore,” Linghu Chong said.
He had wanted Yilin to tell jokes so she would stop crying and smile again. Now that she was smiling, his goal had been accomplished, so he slowly closed his eyes.
Yilin sat by his side and gently whisked the branch again to drive away bugs. The sound of c
roaking frogs could be heard from streams in the distance almost like a sweet lullaby. Yilin started feeling fatigued. Her eyelids were getting heavier and heavier; she couldn’t keep her eyes open and finally dozed off into her own dream world.
In the dream, she wore the beautiful dress of a princess and walked into a magnificent palace. A handsome young man by her side held her hand, and he seemed to vaguely resemble Linghu Chong. Then the two of them started floating into the air and above the clouds. She just felt unspeakable joy and fulfillment. Suddenly an old nun ran after them, scowling, with a sword in her hand. It was Master! Yilin was shocked! She heard her Master yelling, “You dirty little swine, you not only didn’t follow the rules of the nunnery, but dared to be a princess, and mix around with this loafer!” Master grabbed her arm while yelling and started pulling insistently. Instantly, everything fell into complete darkness. Linghu Chong disappeared, and Master also disappeared, leaving her falling through the heavy dark clouds. Yilin screamed in fear, “Big Brother Linghu, Big Brother Linghu!” Her entire body became weak and she could neither move her arms nor her legs. Not able to struggle, she screamed even more and suddenly found herself waking up from the nightmare and being stared at by Linghu Chong, his eyes wide open. Yilin blushed. “I…I…,” she mumbled shyly.
“Did you have a nightmare?” Linghu Chong asked.
Yilin’s face blushed again. “I am not sure.” Then with a quick glance, she found that Linghu Chong had an unusual expression on his face; it seemed as though he was trying to endure some severe pain.
“Your…your wounds are hurting badly?” she asked hurriedly.
“It’s no big deal,” Linghu Chong said, but his voice was shaking. Soon, big drops of sweat beaded on his forehead. Yilin could easily tell that he was in great pain.
Yilin was very worried and kept asking herself, “What should I do? What should I do?”
She took out a handkerchief and wiped the perspiration from his brow. When her little fingers brushed Linghu Chong’s forehead, it felt as if she had just touched a piece of burning coal. She once heard from her Master that when a person was wounded by knife or sword cuts and became feverish it would be very dangerous. Out of desperation, she started reciting Buddhist scriptures.
“For all living creatures, when trouble happens, if he calls Bodhisattva Guanyin’s name with absolute faith, then Bodhisattva Guanyin43 would hear him and help him out of trouble. If the one calling Bodhisattva Guanyin’s name were trapped in a big fire, fire would not be able to burn him, all because of the holy power of the Bodhisattva. If he were washed away by big waves, then when he calls Bodhisattva’s name, he would drift to a shallow spot….”
The scriptures were from the ‘Scripture of Magical Power from Bodhisattva Guanyin.’ At the beginning, her voice was still trembling, after a while, she gradually calmed down. Hearing Yilin’s melodious voice getting calmer and calmer, Linghu Chong could tell that she had full faith in the magic power of the scripture.
She continued, “If one were about to be murdered, and he calls Bodhisattva Guanyin’s name, the murderer’s knife and staff would break into pieces, thus protecting him from danger. If demons came to bother people, one can call Bodhisattva Guanyin’s name, then the demons wouldn’t be able to see him, let alone hurt him. If one has shackles around his body, no matter whether he is guilty or not, if he calls Bodhisattva Guanyin’s name, then all shackles would break loose and fall to the ground, he can then be freed from the restrain….”
Linghu Chong felt his amusement grow at these words and eventually let out a chuckle.
“What…what’s so funny?” Yilin asked in surprise.
“If I had known that, I wouldn’t have to learn Kung Fu,” Linghu Chong quipped. “If a villain or my personal enemy wanted to kill me, all I…I would need to do is to call upon Bodhisattva Guanyin’s name and the villain’s knife would break to pieces, and I would remain safe…safe and sound.”
“Big Brother Linghu, don’t be disrespectful to the Bodhisattva,” Yilin remonstrated. “If I don’t recite the scriptures with my full heart and faith, it would not work.”
She went on, “If fierce beasts surrounded you and you were frightened by their sharp teeth and claws, you could call Bodhisattva Guanyin’s name, and all the beasts would quickly leave. When you see venomous serpents and scorpions, you can call Bodhisattva Guanyin’s name and praise her holy power, then they will go back to their lairs. When lightening and thunders strike the ground and hail and heavy rain start pouring down, one can call Bodhisattva Guanyin’s name and praise her holy power so that the bad weather would stop and disappear. For all living creatures, there are so many difficulties, but the holy and wonderful power from Bodhisattva Guanyin will help us get through all of them….”
Linghu Chong could hear the sincerity in her voice. Although her voice was low, she was really praying for help with all her heart and had full faith in Bodhisattva Guanyin. It seemed that she had opened her whole heart to the Bodhisattva and was supplicating and praying from deep within her heart for the Bodhisattva to show her magical power and stop Linghu Chong from suffering. She was almost saying, “Bodhisattva Guanyin, I beg you to take away all the pain and suffering from Big Brother Linghu and transfer it all to me. You can change me into a swine, or send me to hell, but please alleviate Big Brother Linghu’s misery….”
Later on, Linghu Chong could no longer discern her words, only the sound of her praying, so sincere and earnest. Unbidden tears filled Linghu Chong’s eyes. He lost his parents when he was just a child. Master and Master-Wife took good care of him, but because he was always naughty and mischievous, they gave him more punishment than kind affection; among his fellow apprentices, every one respected the Big Apprentice Brother, and dared not to go against his wishes. Little Apprentice Sister Lingshan was close to him, but had never shown such care and selfless affection that would accept all manner of misery in exchange for his safety and joy. Feelings of gratitude welled up in his chest; in his eyes, the little nun seemed to have a holy halo around her body.
Yilin’s prayers became softer and softer; in her vision, there seemed to be a real Bodhisattva Guanyin standing in front of her, waving a willow branch and spreading dew to help the needy and relieve the distressed. And every call to the Bodhisattva was a direct plea to ask for mercy for Linghu Chong. Linghu Chong’s heart was filled with gratitude and peace, and soon he fell asleep to the gentle and faithful sound of the scriptures.
Chapter 6: Hand-Washing
With a bright smile on his face, Liu Zhengfeng rolled up his sleeves and got ready to put his hands into the golden basin, when suddenly someone shouted sharply outside, “Stop!”
After Yue Buqun took Lin Pingzhi as his new apprentice, the Huashan group, led by Yue Buqun, arrived at the Liu House. When Liu Zhengfeng heard the news from his servants, he was overwhelmed by both surprise and joy – even the world renowned “Gentleman Sword” in the Martial World, Head Master of the Huashan Sword School, came himself. Wasting no time, he rushed to the door to greet, expressing his gratitude again and again. Yue Buqun appeared to be very polite and modest. After congratulating Liu Zhengfeng with a big smile, he entered the gate with Liu Zhengfeng abreast. Priest Tian-Men, Sister Dingyi, Yu Canghai, Mr. Wen, and He Sanqi all greeted at the door of the hall.
Yu Canghai had his own interpretation. He thought to himself, “Liu Zhengfeng certainly does not have the kind of fame that will get the Head Master of Huashan Sword School to come himself. Yue Buqun must have come for me. Humph! The Five Mountains Sword Alliance does outnumber me here, but my Qingcheng Sword School is not easy to be trifled with either. If Yue Buqun starts to criticize me, I’ll cut him off and question him about Linghu Chong sleeping with prostitutes. When it comes down to blows, we’ll just have to fight it out.” But when Yue Buqun saw him, Yue just bowed down like how he did to all the others and greeted.
“Master Yu, long time no see. You are even in better shape now.”
“Mr. Yue, how
are you?” Yu Canghai bowed back.
After the masters exchanged some short chats, more guests showed up at the gate. This was the day set for Liu Zhengfeng’s “Gold Basin Hand Washing” ceremony. At one hour before noon, Liu Zhengfeng went back to the inner rooms to prepare himself for the ceremony, while his apprentices took over the tasks of catering the guests.
Close to noon, over five hundred more guests from distant locations flooded in. Among the guests, there was Vice-Chief of the Beggars Clan – Zhang Jin’ao, Master Xia of Zhengzhou Six Harmonies Style Studio together with his three sons-in-law, Granny Tie from the Holy Maiden Peak of the Three-Gorges, Chief of the Sea-Sand Clan from the East Sea – Pang Roar, the Dual of the River Qu – Magic Blade, Bai Ke, and Magic Brush, Lu Xisi. Some of them had known each other before, and some had only heard about each other’s names, never having the chance to meet. The Big Hall soon was filled with greetings and chats, almost sounding like a big marketplace.
Priest Tian-Men and Sister Dingyi stayed inside their rooms to rest, not bothering going out to greet the crowd. They both thought, “Among the guests here today, some have good reputations in the Martial World, but some others are obviously people with doubtful characters. Liu Zhengfeng is a Master of the Hengshan Sword School. Why doesn’t he conduct himself with dignity, instead, associating himself with all kinds of people indiscriminately? Wouldn’t that lower the reputation of our Five Mountains Sword Alliance?” Yue Buqun, on the other hand, was very fond of making friends. Even when many nobodies or even people with not-so-good reputations came by to chat with him, he always chatted and joked with them without any arrogant posture as the Head Master of the Huashan Sword School – a famous one in the Martial World.
Meanwhile, directed by apprentices of the Liu House, the servants had set up over two hundred banquet tables inside and outside the Big Hall. Liu Zhengfeng’s relatives, subordinates, bookkeepers, and apprentices including Xiang Danian and Mi Weiyi started seating the guests. Based on the fame and seniority in the Martial World, Priest Tian-Men, the Head Master of the Taishan Sword School, should be seated at the head of the table, but since the five Sword Schools were all part of the Sword Alliance, Priest Tian-Men, Yue Buqun, and Sister Dingyi were all half-hosts as well, so it wouldn’t be appropriate for them to be seated in the seats of honor. Other senior masters all yielded to each other; no one wanted to sit at the head of the table.