Fowl Play

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Fowl Play Page 14

by RJ Blain


  Mom would pull such a stunt without hesitation, and I’d seen Ma cheat enough times to know she would, too. Together, the pair terrified me, and I had no doubt they’d concoct a scheme to ensure I’d leave home one day. “They would. Those insufferable...” I choked back a scream of frustration and pulled my hair. “They would! They really would.”

  “And it would explain why your ma was so willing to offer a dowry, too.”

  “May I please borrow your phone a minute?”

  “Of course.” Kenneth retrieved it from the coffee table and handed it to me.

  I dialed Ma’s number from memory and connected the call.

  “I see you’ve stolen Agent Bernard’s phone again,” Ma answered.

  “I want the truth, nothing but the truth, and the whole truth, you feathered menace from hell!” I howled.

  “It seems your father was not exaggerating that you’re in a rather miffed mood today. What do you want to know?”

  “Did you and Mom conspire to get me high on pixie dust so I’d meet Kenneth?”

  Ma’s sweet laughter rang out. “Would I, a sweet, innocent angel, do such a thing to my own daughter?”

  “Yes, you would. Without hesitation.”

  “You’ve answered your own question, my sweet child. Do enjoy your week with him, and as I am such a sweet, loving angel, I asked Louisa to make sure you wouldn’t grace us with a grandchild quite yet. Enjoy your mate’s company for the next week, and as soon as you get back to New York, have him look into birth control if you don’t want any little ones under foot quite yet. It’s a known problem for female lycanthropes to have trouble with their birth control. Enjoy yourself, Emma.”

  Ma hung up on me, and I gaped at the darkened display of Kenneth’s phone.

  “I’m going to hazard a guess she said something you didn’t expect.”

  “She confirmed your theory is accurate. She also coerced Mom into fiddling with me so I can’t have children for the next week, and she wants me to tell you you need to get birth control next week because it won’t work for me.”

  Kenneth covered his mouth with his hand and cleared his throat. “So, you’re telling me we have all week to ensure I contract your virus without having to worry about children?”

  Some days, I loved my parents, but others, I wanted to kill all three of them for putting me into awkward situations. Some days, like today, they managed to do both. “That’s exactly what I’m telling you.”

  “Is sending them flowers and a thank you card the appropriate response for this? Because seriously? Men dream about the day they win a beautiful woman and earn the permission of both parents. In your case, I have three parents to worry about, and one’s a lycanthrope, which means he can pop my head off at his leisure.”

  Poor Kenneth. When I thought about it that way, he had a lot more to lose than I did, including his head. “I’d offer to protect you, but honestly, I have a really bad track record at protecting men from my father. After the first half dozen or so times a wolf came calling and Dad beat him up, I stopped trying.”

  “I’d say I could handle myself around your father fine, but I’m going to hide behind you if I ever make him angry. He probably won’t go through you to get to me.”

  The only way I could protect Kenneth from my father was to claim him as my mate, as lycanthropes were documented to spend an obscene amount of time grieving over a lost partner, which would ensure he wouldn’t get any of the grandchildren I knew Dad ultimately desired. Lycanthropes were so predictable and easy to manipulate. “If he wants grandchildren, he won’t touch you, and he knows it.”

  “I like that train of thought, and I especially like how determined you sound. Do you think you’ll need a full week to stake your claim, or is that sneaky little virus of yours robust enough to take what it wants right out of the gate?”

  Kenneth Bernard was a little bit of heaven and a little bit of hell mixed together to drive me wild, but some mistakes were worth making. I had no real reason to say no, and when I thought about it, I had more reasons than I cared to count to say yes.

  Somehow, we’d make it work. It’d probably be a glorious mess, just like the odd relationship between my father and mothers so often was, but we’d get through it somehow.

  “Let’s find out.”

  He needed no other invitation.

  About the Author

  Want to hear more from the author? Sign up for the Sneaky Kitty Critic’s newsletter!

  RJ Blain suffers from a Moleskine journal obsession, a pen fixation, and a terrible tendency to pun without warning.

  * * *

  When she isn't playing pretend, she likes to think she's a cartographer and a sumi-e painter.

  * * *

  In her spare time, she daydreams about being a spy. Should that fail, her contingency plan involves tying her best of enemies to spinning wheels and quoting James Bond villains until she is satisfied.

  * * *

  RJ also writes as Susan Copperfield and Trillian Anderson.

  If you enjoy using bookbub, you can follow RJ and her alter ego Susan there.

  http://thesneakykittycritic.com

  Magical Romantic Comedies (with a body count)

  Playing with Fire

  Hoofin’ It

  Hearth, Home, and Havoc

  Whatever for Hire

  Serial Killer Princess

  Owl Be Yours

  Fowl Play

  No Kitten Around (Oct 2018)

  Blending In (Nov 2018)

  Cheetahs Never Win (Dec 2018)

  Saddle Up (2019)

  Grave Humor (May 2019)

  Dragon Her Heels (Late 2019)

  From Witch & Wolf World

  Series: Witch & Wolf

  Inquisitor

  Winter Wolf

  Blood Diamond

  Silver Bullet

  * * *

  Series: Wolf Hunt

  Wolf Hunt

  Wild Wolf (2019)

  The Edge of Midnight (2020)

  * * *

  Series: Nature of the Beast

  Pack Justice

  Dual Nature (TBD)

  * * *

  Series: Balancing the Scales

  Karma

  License to Kill (TBD)

  * * *

  Standalones

  Beneath a Blood Moon

  Shadowed Flame

  * * *

  Tales of the Winter Wolf

  (Short Story/Novella Collections)

  Omnibus - Volumes One-Five

  Volume Six (Aftermath to Winter Wolf.)

  Other Stories by RJ Blain

  Jesse Alexander Novels

  Water Viper

  Steel Heart (late 2018/early 2019)

  * * *

  Requiem for the Rift King (Epic Fantasy)

  Storm Without End

  Storm Surge

  The Tides of War (TBD)

  Witch & Wolf World Reading Order

  The Witch & Wolf world is all over the place. I’m sorry about that—really. I’m worse than a gnat sometimes, flitting from project to project, excited to write my next story. Here’s my preferred reading order of these books. While I wrote Inquisitor first, it actually happens after Winter Wolf.

  Note: You can jump in on any series with the exception of Blood Diamond, Silver Bullet, and later volumes—they are dependent on events that happen prior in the series.

  Winter Wolf (W&W #2)

  Tales of the Winter Wolf Vol. 6

  Tales of the Winter Wolf Vol. 1-5

  Inquisitor (W&W #1)

  Beneath a Blood Moon (Standalone)

  Blood Diamond (W&W #3)

  Silver Bullet (W&W #4)

  Wolf Hunt (WH #1, W&W #5)

  Wild Wolf (WH #2, W&W #6)

  The Edge of Midnight (WH #3, W&W #7)

  * * *

  The following books can be read at any time:

  Nature of the Beast

  Pack Justice

  Dual Nature (TBD)

 
Balancing the Scales

  Karma

  License to Kill (TBD)

  Standalone

  Shadowed Flame

 

 

 


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