“Okay, Donna, let’s pick up where we left off yesterday.”
* * *
Richard knew the routines at Joy’s household by heart. He knew that at that time in the morning, Arthur was still in school. The twins would be having a morning snack while watching Barney on TV. He rang the bell; and when Donna opened the door, he held up the shoe and the toy for her to see.
“Mr. Feilds! How nice of you to bring those back!”
“I didn’t want you to have to wait the whole day for them until Joy made it home, and please call me Richard.”
“You shouldn’t have bothered. Would you like to come in?”
She obviously expected him to say no and was surprised when he walked into the family room. “Yes, thank you.”
He walked toward the twins having crackers and juice in their high chairs and said hello. They looked at him with curiosity, maybe remembering him from the day before.
Donna was eyeing him with curiosity too. He sat on the couch in the family room and said, “Donna, I need your help.”
“How can I help you?”
He began his rehearsed story. “I have a confession: my interest in Joy is more than friendly.”
Clapping, Donna sat down next to him. “I knew it! I knew it from the moment I saw you!”
“Please, you have to swear that you won’t tell Joy about this. I know that if she has any suspicion about my feelings, she’s going to push me away, and I’ll lose even her friendship.”
“You have my word.”
Richard faked relief and continued. “Donna, my intentions are good. I care for Joy, and I want to know if I have a chance with her.”
Donna sighed. “Richard, this is no small task you’re embarking on. This woman refuses to move on with her life. People have been trying to play matchmaker and set her up with men practically since Mr. O’Hara’s funeral service. She follows a standard procedure with men drooling over her—she ignores them. She fakes obliviousness until they get discouraged and go away.”
He agreed with that; he’d seen her do it to Dr. Levenstein.
She waved a hand. “You could play striptease music and dance half-naked on her desk, and she’d continue to work at her computer, pretending that she didn’t see you.”
Holding back a chuckle, Richard tried to look serious. “Donna, that doesn’t scare me. I’m as hardheaded as she can be. If I can earn her trust as a friend, I could warm her up, but my worry is another one. A worry that doesn’t let me live, and that’s what I need your help with.”
“What is it?”
He made a studied pause. “I fear I’m competing for her love with a ghost who’s getting in the middle of us all the time, Michael O’Hara. I need to know, Donna. Am I wasting my time because she’ll never forget him? Was he truly the perfect man people claim he was?”
A sad smile reached Donna’s lips. “I have to imagine that Joy was really in love with him.” Her smile vanished. “That’s the only way to explain how she could stand him.”
Surprised, he asked, “What do you mean?”
“I don’t like to speak ill of the dead, but that man was the most arrogant and bossy person I’d ever met. He wanted to control everything that went on. I couldn’t stand him, and I know he couldn’t stand me.”
Richard was amused. “You didn’t get along with him?”
“We were fire and gasoline. Because I refused to let him treat me bad like he treated his other employees. The only reason why I didn’t quit was because of Joy. The only reason why he didn’t fire me was because I was the only white person who would agree to take care of his kids.”
“The only white person? What do you mean?”
“The man couldn’t stand anybody who looked a little different than him. That’s what I mean.”
Richard had the feeling he’d uncovered something important. “That’s hard to believe. He was well known to be a humanitarian and a religious man.”
She snorted. “It was all hypocrisy. The guy should have been walking around with a white hood on and the letters KKK on his shirt. Just as one example, he constantly harassed Joy, making fun of two of her best friends because one of the women is Hispanic and the other one is black. In front of them, he was the most charming man; but the moment they left, the jerk called one ‘The Beaner’ and the other one ‘Kinky-hair.’”
“What did Joy do?”
Donna puffed. “Not much more than a stern look. The poor woman must have been blinded by love. Even when she disagreed with him, she was constantly trying to justify him in front of other people, interceding with the house staff to get them to stay when they were threatening to leave because of him. She was enabling his arrogant behavior and lack of consideration to others.”
Richard pondered. Donna’s comments were supporting his impression that it was unlikely that Joy had been part of the plot to kill Michael O’Hara.
“So, you do believe they were that crazy-in-love couple everybody talks about?”
Putting her hand on his shoulder, Donna said, “Richard, I hope I haven’t discouraged you by telling you all this. My point was: I know that the media talks about the guy like a saint and that it may feel overwhelming to have him for competition; but trust me, he was far from perfect.”
She paused and added, “I can see you are a good man, Richard. I don’t think that it’s going to be easy to get her to snap out of her spell and pay attention to a man again, but why not think you can be the person to do that? I see a kindness in you that’s unmistakable. I saw your patience with the children, and your desire to help. If there’s anything I can help you with, you can count on me.”
“Thank you,” Richard muttered, feeling uneasy for lying to the woman. “Well, Donna. I have to go. Thanks for your time.”
* * *
“Michael O’Hara was a racist?” Samuel’s voice was full of surprise.
Richard nodded. “That’s what the nanny said.”
“Have you found any proof to support that?”
“I spent most of the morning reading about every single bill he proposed and the projects he was working on at the time of his death. Nothing gave a hint of racial discrimination.”
“Practicing racism in his personal life wouldn’t qualify as a reason for the LOTU to eliminate him. They must have feared he’d use his political power in a way detrimental to their ideals.”
Richard assented. “The other theory is that if he wasn’t doing something detrimental, maybe he was failing to do something they wanted.”
“How about projects from other congressmen that he was blocking or vetting?”
“I haven’t gotten to that part yet, but it’s going to be difficult to know what his vote was at any given time.” Richard paused and added, “Unless you were a person close to him, or a person from inside his political team.”
* * *
Richard watched Charles Clark, O’Hara’s best friend, get up from his chair, breathing heavily. He was flushed with indignation.
“Michael a racist? That’s outrageous! Whoever made up that lie is trying to hurt the memory of a wonderful man! Who told you that?”
Richard smiled. “Obviously I can’t reveal my sources and informants. Now, please answer a question. Right before O’Hara’s death, there was a short-lived proposal to pass a law allowing legalization of illegal immigrants who could prove outstanding behavior in the community and an employment record.”
“The Fernandez Bill.”
“Do you happen to know what O’Hara’s opinion of that bill was?”
Clark hesitated. “He wasn’t a fan of it. Many of us weren’t. It was quite an unconventional idea.”
Richard nodded. “Also, about six months before his death, there was an attempt to pass a bill that would allow the government to audit large companies, surveying the ethnic distribution of applicants and employees to ensure that the equal opportunity principle was being applied.”
“The Equality Bill. None of us were a fan of that one either. It w
as too intrusive.”
Abruptly, Clark’s office door opened, and Richard heard a somewhat familiar voice speak. “Charlie! Get moving! We’re going to be late for the meeting!”
“Where are your manners, Josh, don’t you ever knock? The FBI here is trying to talk to me!”
Richard turned around and froze in his chair. Josh Levenstein was in front of him. He wore a business suit instead of his white coat, and behind him stood his now eternal companion, his bodyguard.
Richard’s heart raced, realizing that the man had already seen him and heard he was an FBI agent. Damn it! If he mentioned anything to Joy, he’d blow his cover.
There was a long silence before Charles Clark spoke. “Have you met each other?”
Richard didn’t answer. Levenstein walked slowly toward him and for a split second, Richard thought there was vague recognition in his eyes, but it was soon gone.
“I don’t think so. Dr. Josh Levenstein, nice to meet you.”
The man shook Richard’s hand briefly, barely grabbing his fingertips, and immediately looked away from him. “Come on, Charles, I don’t have all day. The other members of the board are waiting for us.”
Clark turned to Richard with an apologetic gesture. “I’m sorry. I have a meeting with the other members of the Healthcare Advisory Board.”
Richard knew that Clark, an economist, was one of the few non-physician members of that Board.
“No problem at all, Mr. Clark, we’ll catch up some other time.”
Richard left the office, hiding a sigh of relief for not being recognized.
Chapter 14
Friday night, Richard and Ray returned home, still engaged in animated conversation about the game they’d just watched. Unbelievably, the underdog of the league—The Orlando Magic—had won.
“This was the coolest night of my life!” said Ray. “I have to call Ethan and tell him all about it, but I took so many pictures my battery’s dead. Can I borrow your phone?”
“I’m sure Ethan’s asleep by now, which reminds me that it’s past midnight. Get ready for bed.”
“I’m way too excited to sleep! Can’t we watch a movie instead?”
Richard chuckled. “Bedtime. Now.”
Any other day, Ray would’ve protested. However, tonight he was in a particularly good mood. He skipped on his way to his room. “I’m wearing my Magic T-shirt to sleep in. I’m never taking it off!”
Richard smiled. It had been a long time since he’d seen his son that happy.
Returning to his bedroom, Richard got ready for bed, but he knew he was also too excited to sleep. He was hesitant to let go of the good moment.
Walking to Ray’s room, he saw the light was still on.
He entered. “Hey, Ray, about that movie—”
Richard stopped, realizing the boy was already deep asleep. He smiled. No surprise. It had been an intense day.
Turning the light off, he covered Ray with the blankets. He looked at him sleeping and heard Joy’s voice in his mind.
“Your little boy hasn’t gone anywhere; he’s there. His body might have changed, but his soul is exactly the same. The same soul you felt when carrying that baby in your arms and watching him sleep.”
Richard closed his eyes and hugged Ray. The boy was so tired he didn’t even move.
Holding him in his arms, Richard understood what Joy meant. He could feel the essence of his boy’s soul—the exact same essence as almost fourteen years ago. He could also feel his own soul reaching out for that essence he loved immensely.
* * *
Richard knocked on Andrews’s door and pushed it open.
He was surprised to see him. “Richard? What are you doing here this late on a Sunday?”
“I now believe without a doubt in the existence of the soul. I’m ready for your teachings.”
Andrews snickered. “You changed your mind out of the blue? Very convenient when you’re desperate to convince me to show you my book.”
“It’s true,” Richard insisted. “Last night I felt my son’s soul, and I felt mine reaching for him. It was a revelation.”
Raising one eyebrow, Andrews asked, “And how exactly does a soul feel?”
Richard hesitated. “It’s hard to explain. The closest I can get to it is to say that it was . . . like a smell.”
Andrews stared at Richard. “A smell?”
“Yes, but no. Obviously, a thirteen-year-old can’t smell the same as a newborn, and this essence was exactly the same as before. It was more like . . . an energy you can touch with your insides as you breathe in.”
Andrews was moved. “I know exactly the feeling you’re talking about, but it’s the first time someone described it to me in those words. Has it happened to you before?”
Richard went back in his mind. “Only with one other person, Joy. Every time I’ve hugged her, I’ve felt as if her pleasant smell got stuck in my shirt and followed me around the whole day. But she told me once that she doesn’t wear perfume, so as not to upset her sick patients. I now realize it was not exactly a smell, but that feeling.”
Fidgeting in his seat with a smile, Andrews nodded. “You’ve taken with you a part of the energy field radiating directly from her soul. Has anything else strange like this happened to you lately?”
Richard hesitated. “I haven’t told anybody about this so they don’t say I’m crazy.”
“Try me.”
Uncomfortable, Richard confessed, “The Lords of the Universe coin—You told me where to find it . . . in a dream.”
Smiling, Andrews shook his head. “You must have tremendous potential. Experiences like those start happening after you’ve been engaged in the process of Awakening. Yet you’re having them by second-hand exposure, just by spending time with me and your friend Joy—people functioning at higher levels of vibration.”
A long silence fell, and then Richard said, “Do you agree that I’m ready now?”
Shaking his head, Andrews chuckled. “Getting a few glimpses of a higher awareness doesn’t mean you are ready, my friend.”
With a grunt, Richard looked up and raised his hands.
“Wait,” Andrews said. “That doesn’t mean you’re walking out empty-handed. I still believe that you’re not ready for manufacturing miracles. But today you’ve proven to me that you’re ready to get ready.”
As Andrews walked across the room to the safe hidden inside the closet, Richard looked at him, puzzled. Turning the combination lock, Andrews opened the safe and extracted a thick pile of printing paper stapled at the corner. He returned to Richard and put it in his hands. “This document is an attempt to prevent further damage from my teachings. It contains six basic principles that I now know were missing from the followers who deserted us later on. They’ll be a mandatory requirement before getting access to my book—if I ever decide to share it.”
As he took the papers, Richard’s hands were trembling with excitement. He read the top page, which appeared to be an index.
1-Acknowledge that there are no coincidences.
2-Acknowledge the energy that flows from within and around everybody and everything.
3-Release any preconceived ideas: Appreciate everything, judge nothing.
Richard gasped. “What? This is exactly what we’ve been talking about for the past weeks. Are you telling me that I’m already halfway through?”
“Not so fast, my friend. The first three principles are easy, merely a statement of the minimum requirement to get started. The next three could take you years to complete. They’re not a sequence; they’re a simultaneous process.”
Richard kept reading.
4-You can’t embrace the Universe until you embrace and love yourself: Self-esteem.
5- Unburying the feelings: To be ready for the journey, you have to let go of the past.
6- Love for others: The Golden Rule and the law of Karma.
Andrews said, “These are the principles you need to master before embarking on the trip to true Awakening. T
hey’ll ensure you’ll use your power responsibly and constructively. If you go through these steps, your life will improve dramatically. A great amount of energy currently directed at keeping unresolved issues from the past in check will be released. You’ll be filled with joy and incredible creativity. Take this manuscript with you. Read it, digest it, and then come back.”
Chapter 15
Over the following week, Richard was more scrupulous than ever in his work, even investigating Joy’s DEA activity and tax returns. He desperately needed to prove to himself that he wasn’t biased in her favor. He had to remind himself that she wasn’t a friend, but a suspect.
The improvement in Ray’s attitude after the basketball game was noticeable. Over the weekend, Richard seized the positive momentum and used it to get him to go surfing with him, “carving new memories” as Joy had suggested. He was deeply thankful for her idea and wished he could tell her; but even if the wall of his investigation didn’t exist between them, it had never been easy for him to express his feelings.
He now sat in an armchair at the Hospice House, observing Joy conduct a family session. Sue had warned him that the patient was a heartbreaking case. Infamous at the Hospice House, “Lena” was a young mother with advanced breast cancer.
Joy sat on a loveseat with the patient’s nine-year-old daughter—a beautiful little girl with the saddest eyes he’d ever seen in someone that young. Through drawing together, Joy was getting the girl to talk out her feelings about “her mother going to heaven.”
On a couch nearby sat the little girl’s parents. Richard looked at the husband. He must have been about his own age, but he looked much older, with worry lines plaguing his face. Sitting close to him was an extremely thin Lena holding his hand tightly. Sitting in an umbrella stroller next to them, a toddler played quietly with her mother’s bracelet. Lena slowly leaned over her husband’s shoulder, and he passed his arm around her gently and kissed her bald head.
Feeling an unfamiliar sensation of sadness rising in his chest, Richard desperately tried to replace it with anger. Anger against cancer in general. Anger against God, if He really existed. Even anger against Joy. Why was she lying to this little girl with a promise of a heaven she had no proof existed? In spite of his efforts, anger refused to appear and sadness continued to grow.
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