Billie ate breakfast like a champ. I helped him manage the fork and knife, like I did with my brothers. The boys had learned quickly, and so did Billie. He excitedly talked about his plans for the day (playing with trains) and asked me whether I would join him. I explained I had to go to school, but I would certainly be back for dinner, and he could tell me all about his day. His enthusiasm lessened, but he still remained chirpy.
It was very weird. Why was I taking care of a grown-ass man who was like a child? Yes, he was my uncle, but it's not like I'd ever known him. I resorted to the explanation I had found yesterday: as grandpa's son, he was the heir, so if I wanted to help my brothers inherit, it would be good to stay on good terms with him. Ideally, I'd be his guardian, which would grant me access to his money, as well. Yes, that was it. It wasn't because of the do-goodery and respect of family my father had inculcated in me. It definitely wasn't because I missed my family and this child-like man who was so similar to mother reminded me of them.
After breakfast, grandpa, who'd been observing the whole thing without uttering a single word, stood up.
"Now, Billie, it's time for papa to go to work, and time for Miss Bedwen to go to her classes. Miss Bedwen, please come with me."
I stood up.
"I am going then. Have a nice day, Billie. Listen to Auntie Bettie. I will see if you were a good boy tonight."
"Bye, Dana. Have a nice day."
As I headed to the door, where the maid gave me the coat and gloves, grandpa went with me.
"I hope you don't intend to come to this house daily, Miss Bedwen."
I wasn't, but now I was. I loved going against expectations.
"Why not? I'm sure Billie would like it. He seems to like company."
"Doesn't a young lady like you have many more entertaining ways to spend her days than to spend them with an elderly man and a grown-bodied child? It would be bad if Billie gets attached to you and you stop coming."
"No need to worry, Prof. Bedwen. I've got two years of study left. It would certainly be nice to have free meals until I get a job."
He seemed amused.
"OK then, Miss Bedwen. Go to class now. I'm sure you have many things to learn."
I didn't have classes in the morning, but I did have many things to learn. The first thing I did was head to the library again and look for books on mental magic. To my disappointment, most of them were banned.
"It's not like I could use the magic anyway, as a dark arall. Only trained magicians could do it. And what's the point of banning those books? It's not like anybody learns magic from books." Complex magic still gets taught more in an apprenticeship system than from books and lectures. Students need to get individual training from experts. You couldn't learn stuff like that from books, not without maybe killing yourself in the process.
"Exactly. Why do you want them, anyway? And don't tell me it's for a thesis. You can't have that many thesis topics. Besides, the school wouldn't approve such a topic." The librarian seemed to want to avenge the hours of research I made her do on my behalf by being difficult.
"I'm just trying to learn about the effects of mental magic on people. If I understand it, maybe I can reverse it. You know, what light magic does, the dark undoes."
"Miss Bedwen. You are too educated to know that that common saying is not true. There is no undoing mental magic. Many have tried before you."
"And how many among them were dark arall alchemists? Look, I know this is hard. But I need to at least see if there's anything that can be done. Maybe, if I combine alchemical analysis with dark magic, I can become famous for destroying light mages' most powerful weapon. That would certainly make me a Magister of magic. Or maybe an Archmage. Imagine that."
"Well, I can't give you any books on mental magic, as much as I understand your lofty ambition. But you could look into the Healing section. There may be a few books on the attempts to cure mental magic's effects. You'll see it's impossible."
Impossible or not, I don't let others tell me stuff without trying to make conclusions for myself. I need to learn everything about mental magic and how to counteract it. If grandpa did that to Billie, to protect my family from him, and if he didn’t, to protect my family from whoever did it.
I'd never bothered learning about Healing magic. Never saw the point in learning about something I couldn't do, ever, not even potentially. Dark magic, I can't do until I'm properly trained and Initiated; light magic is beyond my reach, forever.
Turns out light magic uses a different system for annotating magic. I could never see light magic anyway, no dark arall can. We can only sense light magic, not see it. The good thing is, light arall can't see our magic either. The few exceptions of universal magic, which both can do and see, are rather the exception than the rule.
So, before I could even check out anything on Healing and mental magic, I had to get an introduction on light magic. But I wouldn’t be caught dead in the light magic department. People might say I'm a universal mage. To dark arall, being in any way associated or compared to light arall is one of the gravest insults. And the best way to ruin my reputation was to find a way to check out many books on light magic in private.
8
Back at grandpa's house, the housekeeper was eyeing me suspiciously.
"I'm here to read some literature on the project I'm working on with Prof. Bedwen. He is too busy, but I'm sure he'll be OK when I ask him at dinner."
The housekeeper just stared at me, probably amazed at my chutzpah. I stared back at her, calmly. I was invited for dinner at this house after all (this time). What harm could it possibly make to come read some books in my supervisor's library? I'm sure he doesn't hold anything too valuable anywhere that can be accessed without his explicit permission.
She seemed to think the same thing, because she escorted me to the library, showing me which bookshelves were available to guests (that was easy — the ones that weren't locked).
It's not like my grandfather's personal library contained many books that weren't available in the university library. That would be impossible. No man would have the resources to match an institution like the university. No, I came here for privacy.
Although my grandfather's library was full of references to light magic, there weren't any books on dark magic, so I had to write down the typical dark notation by memory. I should borrow a book from the library on dark magic notation. I would also bring my notes from the courses I had attended. But for now, I was trying to find a way to translate light notation into dark notation. I couldn't find anything on it. I should ask Prof. Bedwen about it. For now, I was focusing on the parts of magic that were universal and their notation. It's incredible how different the notation of the same spell can be in different systems. And the units — the units were different. Either their energy units are completely different and much lower, or light mages required a lot more energy to do the same thing. Could that be a thing?
I started making a table on the magical units spent on each spell, with a column for light magic, and a column for dark magic. It seemed like light mages had to spend a lot more effort on the universal parts of magic than dark ones did, relative to the units they spent on the spells of their color.
I also copied a lot of the structures and tried re-drawing them as if it was dark magic. I then started seeing things. I could see magic leaking from the sieve-like structures. But that couldn't be. Surely, the light magicians had checked the scientific advances made in dark magic? If they did the proper math, they would definitely see that the spells they were casting were experiencing lots of friction.
Maybe light mages were just bad at universal magic. So, I had to find another way to translate light magic into dark magic notation. I decided to attack it through the field I knew best: alchemy. In the end, magic works by having an effect on the physical world. And the units of energy needed to change things in the physical world have been measured and calculated by alchemists generations ago.
I could measure magical
energy by estimating how much magic was required to melt ice, stuff like that. But the issue seemed to be that magic measurements are quite inaccurate. I mean, they estimated the magical energy units required to boil a liter of water from room temperature (what's that — is it a cold day? A warm day?), as somewhere between 3 and 5 units of energy — depending on a mage's experience. Something alchemists have measured — to the tenth of a unit — they still aren't able to measure with any level of success.
"It seems there's an error in your calculations, Miss Bedwen." I suddenly heard behind me. I had been so deep in thought, I hadn’t noticed anybody behind me. So somebody had sneaked behind me. But then, Prof. Bedwen had the absolute right to be in his home library, whereas I… didn't.
I turned around and looked up. He was quite close and got closer. Now, he was leaning into me, impossible to ignore, looking at my notes. He even turned a few pages back, going over my shoulder.
"I see you are trying to create a unified language of magic," he observed. "A good attempt, Miss Bedwen. As far as I know, previous attempts weren't done by equating magical energy to alchemical energy. It might even work."
"Previous attempts?" don't tell me nobody had tried to formalize magical units. Alchemists had done it two centuries ago. No wonder I always preferred alchemy to magic. Magic is just so… backward.
"The Inquisition tried, as an attempt to formalize magic, to measure it and to standardize it. Thanks to their efforts, magic moved from an apprenticeship system to teaching in universities. They haven't been able to find ways to universalize magic, though."
Of course the Inquisition tried to not just eliminate dark mages, but the need for them.
"Well, if current Inquisition sympathizers are anything to go by, it's not surprising they didn't manage much." My opinion of Inquisitors had always been low.
"Don't say that. Remember, the Inquisition was the most powerful organization 500 years ago until the Reformation. They even had dark mages amongst them. To combat other dark mages, of course."
Why any dark arall in their right mind would join the Inquisition was a mystery to me. But then, the Inquisition was full of people whose talent had been to play with people's minds.
"And where may I see those documents?"
"In the Inquisition Archives, of course. The main one happens to be in Ashford. You know, before they moved the capital to Ecton, Ashford was their center. Closer to the action. But most of the contents won't be open to the public. Not even to me. You probably need a security clearance for that; most of it is top-secret."
I sighed. It seemed like every time I tried to learn anything, there was another layer of knowledge made secret by the government. First the knowledge about secret civilizations, then information about mental magic, and now the information on the dark and light magic similarities. I froze, my mind rambling.
"Why do you want to learn this, anyway? Even as broadly as you stated it, it doesn't seem like it resembles the topic of your thesis."
The topic of my thesis… which I'd started to gain info about government secrets on alchemically superior civilizations… (besides being close to my grandfather, that is) from which I'd jumped to light magic, and then mental magic… It wasn't unusual for me to dig into a topic and end up in a rabbit hole, going into completely different paths. I may be an alchemist, but I'm also a dark arall; I can only exert effort to study that which interests me at the moment. Alchemy was just one of my deepest interests. But with this, I'd been jumping from topic to topic, without going deep, trying to understand the whole world. To avoid signing up for the government service. For work that I was already doing.
They had hooked me already, there was no denying it. It seemed like I would already do the work, anyway. Might as well get paid for it and get permission to study all the sources. And if I could use the position to help my family… It's not like peeking into the Inquisition Archives is corruption, isn't it?
"Miss Bedwen… Miss Bedwen! Are you all right?" I heard the shout as I felt my shoulder being shaken. I regained conscience, my mind back at the topic.
"Sorry, Prof. Bedwen. I was just thinking."
"Thinking what?"
"About dinner. All this thinking made me hungry. Will there be red meat for dinner? I know you don't like it, but Billie and I may eat it. I'm feeling like eating beef."
"You'll have to ask Bettie." He knew I was trying to change the subject; there's no way I can fool such an experienced person. But he let me do it. "Now, I guess since you're that hungry, we should go have dinner. I'm sure Billie is waiting. Now, before we go, could you please put the books back to their places? I don't have an issue with you using them, but I’d like you to put them back."
"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir."
I called the Captain on the number he gave me.
"Ah, Miss Bedwen. I see you're answering before the deadline. I guess the answer will be positive then." He was quite cheerful as he said it.
"I have conditions."
His voice became weary.
"Conditions?"
"Yes. I'd like to continue being a student. I have many academic commitments, and I'd like to continue them."
"Of course, Miss Bedwen. We would like you to finish your education." He seemed quite relieved.
"And I'd like to have access to the Inquisition Archives. And all documents related to the study of magic."
There was a pause.
"Miss Bedwen. There aren't any mentions of what we're looking for in the Archives. We've checked."
"Captain," he wasn't fooling me for a second, "I will not waste my time doing research that has already been done. And to make sure it wasn't, I'd like access to all the documentation on magic that has been done."
If I was going to lose my liberty and privacy, it should at least help me protect my family. And I needed information. On what had happened to Billie. Who had done that. How it could be avoided in the future.
Another pause.
"OK, Miss Bedwen. You'll have it. Access to the Inquisition Archives. After you sign a confidentiality agreement. Supervised access." Having a spy accompanying me at all times was bad, but it's not like that was unexpected.
"OK. Deal. When should I start, then?"
"Next week. After you sign a confidentiality agreement."
"Why did you invite me here?" Jack asked, standing beside me in the Commencement Ball. I'd never gone to it before, as it was a black-tie event, and thus required a dress.
"Because you look dashing in your uniform. Why did you have to wear civilian clothing?" I was actually wearing a dress. I had selected the least revealing long dress I could find, and wore boots underneath it. I'd wear a dress if I had to (but this was the first time, outside of home, I'd ever done it), but heels was something I wasn't willing to compromise on.
"We're not the army. Police officers aren't supposed to wear mess dress to outside work events. I'm here in my private capacity, after all. Which reminds me. Why did you invite me?"
"Because I needed a companion. I can't come to an event like that alone, you know. It's not done."
"Well, they don't seem to be bothered." He said, nodding towards some freshmen girls, eagerly flirting with some boys.
"If I come alone, I'll get invited to dance. And I don't want to dance."
He took a couple of champagne glasses from the tray a waiter was carrying and gave me one.
"Why come to a ball, if not to dance? As your companion, I can't let you spend the whole evening without a dance."
"OK, we'll dance. A contradance." Holding hands and jumping around is silly enough, but at least it doesn't require too many skills. And it was a dance practiced in Crow Hill, unlike the waltz. And it wasn't too gendered.
"A waltz."
"Don't push it. A contradance and a quadrille."
"Deal. So why did you come?"
"Not your business." I'd come as a part of my stalking my grandfather plan. I wasn't getting anything remotely interesting from observing him at
his home, or in class. Since lecturers were supposed to come, I decided to observe him in a more relaxed environment. And maybe, if he got drunk enough, I could get something out of him. That was the idea, at least. I had to stay sober for that, though, so I only took a small sip.
"Can I consider this as part of my repayment?" Jack asked.
"No. Don't be cheap. Didn't you say you want a blank slate, and all that? I thought you might want to see me in a dress. But if you don't, feel free to leave. I'm not forcing you to stay."
"Oh, I do like seeing you in a dress." He looked at my chest appreciatively. Despite it being not that revealing, it was much tighter than the layers of thick clothes I was used to wearing. Fitted clothes were not something typical in an alchemists' attire. The health and safety inspectors were monsters; they'd eat you alive for something as silly as wearing a fitted dress to the lab. And what's the point of wearing a nice dress if it's going to be under layers of protective coating?
"Hey, Dan. How come you're here? In a dress, no less." I suddenly heard behind me. I turned around.
"Joe! You, in a fresher's ball? How come?"
He was looking fine in the custom-made suit. You could really see that his family had money by his attire. I was more used to hear him bragging, but he usually went around wearing alchemists' usual attire of good quality, durable but practical clothing that doesn't stain. The silk suit he was wearing definitely stained easily.
"That's a question more appropriate for you, actually. I come here every year. To check out the new girls. Never seen you here before, though. Actually, I've never seen you in a dress." He glanced at my dress, making me slightly uncomfortable. But as his eyes went down, he noticed Jack's hand at my waist, and he looked at Jack. "How come he's here? Outsiders are not invited."
"He's my plus one."
"So, are you back with him? After everything he did." Joe never liked Jack, from the beginning. I asked him after I broke up with him whether it was because he was a spy, but he told me he just had a bad gut feeling. His gut feelings must have been pretty accurate, considering he never liked any of the suitors I had before Jack, either.
The Apprentice's Path: The Alchemist #1 Page 7