“Neither? Really?” I give it additional thought as I watch Pyper check one of the guns. When she sees they are both warm she hands one to me and together we start gluing pink plastic gemstones to my leg cast. “I thought for sure you would say a guy like Dean. Remember the time we made a pros and cons list about the attributes of each of them?” We both giggle at the memory, “Your Dean list was like a mile long.”
After gluing a huge silver gemstone, Pyper looks at me with humor shining in her eyes, “Yeah, I remember, I am definitely attracted to the idea of a badass like Dean, but I picture myself with a serious business man.”
“A business man? Really? You want an uber professional kind of guy?”
“Well… yeah. Can you imagine me with any other kind? I mean, I know I’m pretty laid back, but I want a guy that is financially independent in his own right. One who wants to take care of me, even if I don’t need that kind of care-taking, and doesn’t just want to be with me because of my dad’s money and the connections he would hope to acquire by association.”
“You’re really worried about that? You’ve never mentioned it before.”
“Sure, wouldn’t you be? Ouch! Son of a bitch!”
“Glue get you?”
“Yep, damn that hurts. Anyway, my dad isn’t a celebrity like George Clooney by any means, but he’s still well known. I worry about people using me to get to him.”
“That makes sense; I never considered that, I guess. But you can’t let fear of something that may or may not ever happen keep you from dating. You could find someone that will make you really happy. I’m not saying you need a man to be happy, but I know you. You are like most people, you’d like someone to share your life with; companionship. We all want to be loved like that, and no matter what you say sometimes, or how much you joke, you’re no exception.”
Pyper fills our wine glasses for the third time, maybe - I don’t know, I’ve lost track. “Yes, you’re right, I would like to find someone, but I’m sure as hell not going to settle for just anyone.”
I nod my head, “No, you shouldn’t ever settle,” I agree. “Hey, remember that guy you told me you dated once? The artist?”
Immediately Pyper groans and pauses from gluing rhinestones. She looks up at the ceiling like she’s recalling exactly whom I’m speaking of, “Oh God yes, anywhere we would go he would be all ‘Oh wow, look at the naked beauty in the way this trash can sits there taking up space and holding garbage within. Can’t you just see how the earth holds its balance of good and bad in its simplicity,’ he was so weird. And made no sense.”
I snort mid-drink and am surprised wine doesn’t come out of my nose, “Didn’t he ask you to pose nude for him?”
Pyper gives a loud laugh, “Yeah, that was the last thing he ever asked me. I dumped him after that. Freak!”
“That seems a little harsh. I mean, what’s a little nakedness in the name of art?”
“Very funny, Livvie. You know very well you never would have done it if our roles had been reversed. Besides, he wanted me to pose nude on solar panels – he was really into the green planet as well.”
“Solar panels?” I quickly recover when I see the claws coming out. “Oh come on now, I don’t know. If I recall correctly, I seem to remember someone once telling me that I needed to take chances in life. That I wouldn’t know what greatness is out there if I didn’t jump in with both feet and put myself out there and blah, blah, blah. Seems you could have accomplished that… being out there.” I can’t help but goad her a bit.
Pyper’s eyes widen and she gives me a mischievous grin, “Oh my god, that person sounds like a total bitch.” She’s waving the glue gun around as she uses her hands to emphasize her statement. She’s at the top of my cast and precariously close to my lap as she’s waving it around, making me a tad fearful. “I mean, please, like you aren’t capable of making your own decisions, or something.”
“Yeah, she’s a total bitch. And it seems to me, she should take her own advice.” I respond quickly, “Hey! Watch it with that glue gun, would ya?”
“What?” She looks down at herself and realizes she was waving it around, “Oh sorry.”
I can’t help but laugh, “After everything I’ve been through, that’s all I need. I can see the headline now, ‘Woman Dead After Suffering Third Degree Burns to Vagina.”
I see Pyper’s expression fall for a moment at my statement and I want to kick myself. I didn’t mean to sound all serious or make her sad. I was trying to be funny. She quickly recovers, “Oh please, a few third degree burns never killed anyone.”
I roll my eyes and change the subject, “Do you still have your dating profile up on Date Me?”
“No. I took it down while you were missing.”
I wasn’t expecting that answer, “What? Why?”
“That’s a pretty dumb question, Livvie. I wasn’t in the mood for that kind of thing while you were gone. My email would get overloaded with messages from the site, and I wanted to keep it clear in case any news came through. I finally just deleted my profile.”
“Oh.” I don’t meet her eyes, even though I can feel her staring at me. I pretend to be very involved in opening the pink glitter, “Well, we should start a new one for you. Get you out there meeting people again.”
Pyper gives me a sad smile, “Maybe some time, I’m not really in the mood for that right now.”
“Why? Now is as good a time as any.”
“Just because, Livvie,” there’s something in the tone of her voice that makes me meet her eyes. I don’t expect the fear I see lingering in her eyes or in the way her whole body has tensed up.
“What’s wrong?” I ask her confused.
She sighs, “I know you won’t leave it alone, so truthfully, the whole thing with Deacon really scared me. It made me realize that you don’t always know people, ya know? You just can’t be too careful and it kind of put a sour taste in my mouth on the whole dating thing for right now.”
My stomach clenches and I flinch when I hear Deacon’s “Hello Princess” in my mind at her words. She couldn’t be more correct. Nothing is scarier than thinking you know someone and finding out that you didn’t really. Nothing at all. “I get it, and I’m really sorry.”
“Don’t you dare apologize,” she points a finger at me, well more like points a glue gun at me. “This is not at all your fault. This is just me being smart. You’re my best friend and I’ve had a front row to everything you’ve been through. Well mostly. Anyway, I don’t think anyone with half a brain, could be close to what I’ve witnessed from Deacon, and not have a little justified fear in them.”
I’m proud of myself for managing to keep myself from flinching at his name. That has to be progress. “You’re right. I just hate to think that I’ve contributed to you not carrying on and living your life the way you should. Or that…he has stripped you of that.”
She secures another gemstone to my cast and I see we’ve just about got the whole thing filled up. “Well you know better than that, and I’m sure my feelings are only temporary. I will get my mojo back eventually, I’m sure.” She hesitates, and I can tell she wants to say something but when she presses her lips together, I can tell she’s decided not to.
“What is it?”
Her eyes meet mine. “What?”
“I can tell you want to say something to me, but you hesitated.”
“You’re right. And can I just say for the record that I love the fact that you know me that well?”
I smile, “Well, of course I do.”
She returns my smile, but it falls quickly, “Look, Livvie, I need to say something and it isn’t easy because I know you don’t want to talk about what happened.”
My smile falls at her words and I feel my body stiffen. “But?”
“But I wouldn’t be your best friend if I didn’t tell you that while I understand that you can’t talk to me right now, you still need to talk to someone. And I don’t mean Luke, although you should talk to him too. I me
an a professional.” She stops and takes a big breath, it’s almost as if she’s trying to get it out as fast as possible before she loses her nerve, “Livvie, I can’t even begin to imagine what you are going through. I know that my encounter with Deacon, while terrifying, was not anywhere close to what you experienced, and even I have decided talk to a therapist about it. Please, please, please talk to someone too, Livvie. Please.”
Tears fill my eyes at her words but I’m too choked up to speak.
“You are one of the strongest women I know, but even you can’t get through this alone. Just think about it, okay?”
I manage a nod, and swipe at the tears falling down my cheeks. “Thanks for loving and caring about me, Pyper. I’m lucky to have you.”
“Yes you are!”
“It’s true.” We both sniff and I decide a change of conversation is in order again. So, I say what I know both of us are thinking, “So, it looks like Martha Stewart threw up on my leg.”
She looks at me and I stand up, albeit awkwardly, and flash my newly bedazzled leg cast in the light. We look at it, then at each other, and laugh uncontrollably. The laughter makes me feel good; normal. This is what I need.
14.
LAUGHTER AND LUST
Luke
When I return to Olivia’s condo, I’m immediately met with the sound of laughter. I stop in my tracks for a moment and listen to the beautiful sound. The sound of Olivia’s laughter is one of the best things I’ve heard in a long time. God, it feels like forever since I’ve heard her laugh like that. I feel a small twinge of jealousy that I can’t claim it as my doing. And maybe a bit of guilt that perhaps she had been right about what she needed.
I follow the sound and find Olivia seated on the couch with a blanket thrown over her lap. Pyper sits at her feet with her back against the coffee table, facing her. The TV is on and there are two dudes on the screen arguing over something, but Olivia and Pyper aren’t even paying attention to anything around them. Two wine bottles are on the coffee table, and they each have a glass of wine in their hands.
I stand quietly, unnoticed around the corner. My girl looks so beautiful. She’s got her hair piled high in a bun, and a few strands have fallen around her cheeks and I swear they are glistening a little in the light, making me want to touch them. She’s got a huge smile on her face while she listens to whatever Pyper is going on about, her cheeks are flushed from the alcohol, and her eyes are sparkling. Her body appears relaxed for the first time in days, her shoulders aren’t tense and she’s hunched a bit in comfort instead of ramrod straight. The haunted look that’s been a constant in her eyes has disappeared – at least for the time being. She looks carefree and happy, and while sure, it may be that the alcohol is influencing her reaction; hell, I’ll still take it.
I walk around and approach slowly because I’ve noticed that lately, any sudden motion makes her jump. She may try to cover it up when it happens, but I notice. I notice everything about her. When she sees me, her face lights up, I feel my heart skip a beat and my breath hitch in response, “Well hello there, handsome.”
I try and smooth my features so I don’t look like a love sick, pussy-whipped, sixteen-year-old, but I’m not sure I succeed when I see her smile widen, “Hi angel, looks like you are having a nice time this evening.”
“We are. Why don’t you join us?”
“Don’t mind if I do, but first I’m going to grab one of those,” I point at her glass. I go into the kitchen to grab a glass and then pour the last of the wine from one of their bottles for myself.
While I’m pouring, Pyper who didn’t bother saying hello, other than giving me a smirk, asks Olivia, “Hey, remember the time we went a whole week without talking to each other?”
Olivia snorts, “Of course. How could I forget? I was so pissed at you, you bitch. You totally stole my crush, Adam.” She points her finger at Pyper in emphasis and Pyper laughs.
I choke on my wine, “Adam?” I ask Olivia as I sit beside her on the couch. She places her hand on my thigh and it makes me twitch below the belt. My skin immediately feels hot under her palm and I can’t help but wish she would move her hand higher. Stupid, traitor body can’t control itself around her at all. I look from her hand to her eyes and see she’s already looking at me. I raise my eyebrow at her and give her a smirk, admittedly because she finds both actions sexy, and the flush on her face deepens. Because I am sure that I am the cause, I can’t help but lean in and give her an all too brief kiss on the lips. I taste the wine on her lips and she smells damn near edible. Her lips press against mine in return, and if Pyper wasn’t here, I would push her down on the couch and take more right fucking now.
“So ANYWAY,” Pyper interrupts rudely and I roll my eyes – it’s a good thing I really like her. I growl a little under my breath making Olivia giggle, “Yes, you were mad at me because I talked to Adam.” Pyper giggles.
Olivia chokes on the wine she was sipping and coughs a couple times, “Talk? Oh please.” She turns to me, “I was looking for Pyper after school. I walked past the staircase, by the library, and happened to see red out of the corner of my eye. I turn towards the stairs and see that red-headed slut,” She points at Pyper accusingly, “Lip locked with Adam in the alcove!”
“Who’s Adam?” I ask again after getting ignored the first time.
“Adam Caruso,” Olivia answers.
“Adam Caruso? The douchenozzle track star that walked around high school like he was God’s gift?”
“That’s the one,” Pyper replies.
“She did you a favor if you ask me.” I reply, not at all because I’m jealous. Not even a little.
“I had a crazy crush on him.” Olivia swoons.
“Oh really?” I ask at the same time feeling the green eyed monster rear its ugly head and claw at my chest. I don’t like thinking about my girl crushing on anyone else. At all. Even if it was years ago.
“Oh don’t worry, lover boy, she was much crazier over you.”
I can’t help it. That makes me grin; huge. Damn straight she liked me more. I feel like I should do a victory dance or pound my chest or something. Oh man, I’m so whipped. Olivia laughs and I can’t help but smile automatically in response at the sound. It’s a sound that until tonight, I didn’t realize I missed so desperately. Sure, she’s laughed since she’s been back, but the forced sound is absent this time.
“So, why would you be in the alcove with Olivia’s crush? Not that I mind the fact that it was you instead of Olivia, but that doesn’t seem like you to hurt Olivia like that.”
“We were just talking, it wasn’t a big deal-”
“Talking with her TONGUE,” Olivia scoffs.
“You didn’t let me finish! I was going to say ‘at first’. Look, I don’t really know how it escalated to kissing, one minute he wanted to ask me a question about our home economics class, and-“
“A question about home ec?” I laugh totally interrupting her and not caring when she sighs in annoyance. This is too good. “What the hell kind of question could someone have about home ec?”
“Yes, very good point, Luke. She never did tell me what happened. We eventually just gave in and started laughing after we bonded over a horrible outfit our nemesis, Kim Anderson, wore to school one day. I just let it go and moved on to my crush on you,” Olivia says squeezing my thigh, making me twitch yet again. She needs to stop doing that or I won’t care that Pyper is in the room.
“So now is as good a time as any to fess up then, huh Pyper?” I tease, “I bet I have a good idea what he said to you. Was it something along the lines of, “Hey babe, can I double stuff your oreo?’ Olivia bursts into laughter which of course is gasoline to my fire. “Or was it more like, ‘Can I slap my meat on your grill?’”
Olivia starts giggling out of control, “Oh my gosh… Luke…. I can’t… I can’t… breathe,” I smile at her and laugh too. She’s bent over at the waist and when she catches sight of Pyper, she places her hand over her mouth to try and stifle he
r giggles, to no avail. Her actions prompt me to look over at Pyper and I’m met with a death glare. Her arms are crossed over her chest and she’s fighting a losing battle trying to keep a straight face. Her lips keep twitching at the corners, but then she straightens them again into a hard line.
Not one to be outdone, Olivia chimes in, “Was that what it was, Pyper? You just couldn’t help yourself after that and the next thing you know you were sucking face?”
Pyper loses her battle and they both explode into a fit of giggles, most of it likely spurned on from the alcohol running through their veins.
“Good one, angel.”
“Thanks, babe.” I stare at her and then look at her mouth. I love her lips, her smile. Suddenly the air starts to feel thicker and all I can think about is how I want to take that mouth of hers. My clothes feel itchy and too tight, especially between my legs. I look back at her face and see her eyes are staring at my mouth now, and her laughter fades away. I smirk and it makes her look back at my face, and into my eyes. Her eyes reveal how much she wants me, and I know she sees my need reverberating back at her because her cheeks flush in knowledge. I want to rip her clothes off and have my way with her - on this couch, against the wall, on the floor, on the damn coffee table - I don’t care. I just want her. I start to move my mouth towards hers like there’s a magnet pulling us together.
That is… until we’re rudely interrupted. Again.
“Ahem, excuse me. The third wheel redhead is still sitting in the room you two.”
I curse under my breath and Olivia laughs. “Well then, I think it’s time we leave the room. What do you say, angel? Ready for bed?”
She nods before she even realizes she’s doing it, once again looking at my face, knowing going to bed doesn’t mean sleep. Her gaze travels down and I swear each spot her eyes touch on their journey, makes my body tingle in reaction. When she reaches my lap, her eyes widen a little and she says, “I could go to bed now. Suddenly I’m really…. tired.”
“Yeah, I’ll just bet you are.” Pyper teases.
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