“It’s a great opportunity.”
“Yes. It is a great opportunity.”
Justin lowered his voice. “I won’t go if you don’t want me to.”
“And if I said ‘no’, then what? You’d always remember the time you could have gone to Hawaii and worked.”
“It’s real good money. Economy is slow here. You know that.”
Madison bit her lower lip. “You said you’d never leave me.”
Justin reached over and reached under her chin, tilting her face up. “Madison, I’m not leaving you. I’ll just be away for a couple of months.”
“Sixty days.”
Justin grinned. “More or less.”
Madison crossed her arms. “You won’t look at any of those beautiful women in the bikinis?”
Justin lowered his hands to his lap and crossed his fingers. “I won’t look at any women.”
The gesture was meant to get Madison’s attention.
“You are such a liar!” She couldn’t help but laugh. She playfully slapped him across his upper arm.
He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tight. “I love you.”
“Ya. You say that now. Give you two days in Hawaii and you’ll forget my name.”
“Never.”
“Don’t try to be all nice and friendly now, after you broke your promise.”
“I won’t ever leave you.”
“We will see about that.” She held him tight, never wanting to let him go. He won’t come back. He won’t.
Chapter 32
Roxy carried the extra blanket to Miss Louise’s door and knocked lightly.
“Come in,” the elderly voice called.
Roxy entered. “Hello, Miss Louise. Here’s your extra cover. I’ll lay it at the foot of the bed.”
Miss Louise sat at the table playing solitaire. She looked up from her cards. “Thank you, Roxy. You’re always so attentive to me.”
Roxy smiled and stepped towards the door. “Have a good evening.”
“Roxy, wait a minute.”
Roxy stopped and turned.
Miss Louise held her cards in her hand. “Meredith told me Caroline turned in her resignation today.”
Roxy nodded. “I had heard she might. I guess her mother’s ill and she wants to move to the Peninsula to take care of her.”
“Do you know who will be applying for her job?”
Roxy shrugged. “Megan and Sharon might. I doubt Ebby’s interested.”
Miss Louise laid her cards on the table. “I know it pays more than what you girls make.”
Roxy nodded. “We’re not supposed to talk about raises, but I think it’s at least a couple of bucks an hour more.”
Miss Louise nodded. Her eyes twinkled. “Are you going to apply?”
Roxy laughed, pointing to her chest. “Me? I about gave that man a heart attack when I worked the desk that one day.”
“That wasn’t about your professionalism; that was about your looks.”
What was she trying to tell her? “Na. I wouldn’t have a chance anyway.”
The woman tilted her head and grinned. “You’ll never know unless you try. You don’t give yourself enough credit.”
Roxy didn’t know how to respond.
“I bet, given a choice, you wouldn’t want to be cleaning toilets when you’re my age.”
“No, ma’am. I don’t think I’d like that much.”
Miss Louise picked up her deck of cards. As she placed a card down, she said, “Some times opportunity knocks and no one answers the door.”
Roxy only nodded her head in response. She walked to the door and opened it. Just as she began to close the door behind her, she paused. “Miss Louise?”
“Yes, Roxy?”
“Do you really think I’d have a chance?”
“Yes, Roxy, I certainly do. If, like you say, you’re worried about scaring the customers, you could always...make a few changes.”
“Yes, ma’am. Thanks.”
A mixture of conflicting emotions swirled in her gut. It was nice to know Miss Louise actually thought she had a chance at the desk clerk’s job. But...to think she’d have to change her appearance in order to do it, just didn’t sit right. She had a unique look. If people didn’t like the way she looked...well...fuck ’em. Why did Miss Louise even have to mention the damn job anyway?
* * * *
Later that evening, she drove to Madison’s house and heard about Justin’s job.
“Wow. That sounds awesome!”
“Yes! Super! Especially when your girlfriend is thousands of miles away. All those women in their teensy weenie yellow polka dot bikinis! What if Bud wanted to go?”
Roxy frowned. “He’d probably leave his daughter with me and we’d have loads of fun.”
“Come on, Roxy. Wouldn’t you be a bit jealous?”
“I suppose. But Justin is mad about you.”
Madison pouted. “I can’t keep thinking he won’t come back.”
“That’s going to play hell with your OCD.”
“Tell me about it! He’s leaving next Wednesday.”
“I’ll come over and spend the night.”
Madison took a coke out of the refrigerator, handing one to Roxy and grabbing one for herself. “That would be nice. I’m used to sleeping with someone now.”
“We can work on next month’s budget.”
Madison smiled. “Roxy, you’ll be graduating.”
“No way!”
“That second job has really helped. Two credit card bills will be paid off. You will write letters and tell them you’re closing your account. We’ve already cut up the card, so you won’t even miss them.”
“Huh. So maybe I could quit the extra job?”
“Unless you want to save for something special.”
“A funny thing happened at work today.” She went on to tell Madison what had transpired.
* * * *
A few nights later Roxy drove to the Play Center to meet Bud and April for dinner and play. Roxy found Bud sitting alone in a booth, eating pizza and eyeing April who sat up high in the maze. “Is she going to come down and eat?” Roxy asked, concern in her voice.
Bud laughed. “She’ll come down soon enough and have a few bites, then take off again.”
“So much energy.”
Bud nodded in agreement. “You look a little tired tonight.”
“Yes. I worked my second job last night, and had to be at the motel by seven this morning.”
“Are you going to quit it soon?”
“I’m thinking about it.” She thought about the clerk position and smiled.
“What?”
“Oh,” she waved, “just a silly thought.”
Bud laughed. “Come on, cough it up.”
Roxy explained what Miss Louise had said to her. She felt so self conscious about it; she could feel her face grow warm from embarrassment.
“Are you going to apply?”
Roxy shook her head.
“Why not?”
Roxy felt herself stiffen from tension in her body. “Because I’d have to change. Look at my hair.” She ran her fingers through the bleached blonde, red tipped strands. “I’d have to take out my...jewelry.” She pointed to the stud in her lip and eyebrow.
Bud took hold of Roxy’s hands. “You can do what ever you like, Sweetie. But let me tell you something. How you look isn’t who you are. If you shave your head bald and take off all your jewelry, you’re still my sweet Roxy.”
Roxy was quiet for a moment. “I’ve always wanted to be...different. Be my own person.”
Bud smiled. “A little defiant too.”
Roxy grinned back. “Yes. I’ve had to be...” Her voice trailed off. She didn’t want to talk to Bud about her abuse from her uncle. Not yet. Maybe never.
He must have sensed her discomfort, as he hugged her close to him.
An hour later, Roxy said her goodbyes to Bud and April and headed home. What Bud had said about the job stirred wi
thin her psyche. It was nearing twilight, but, instead of driving home, she ventured down South Skagit Highway for several miles. She turned her little Ford Aspire onto the gravel road of Gilligan’s Creek. She pulled into an area where she could park the car. She walked a short ways until she came to the creek and sat down on an old washed up log. Listening to the sound of the water splashing against the rocks, she closed her eyes. This was one of her favorite places. Who am I anyway? Am I Roxy with the crazy hair and silver studs stuck in my face? Would I be “selling” myself if I changed my appearance in order to get a better paying job? In conforming to society would I lose myself? My individuality? Or would I just be growing up a little? If I do nothing am I picturing myself a victim, a martyr, because of Ned’s abuse?
She opened her eyes and watched the water for a moment. She picked up a handful of rocks, tossing them into the water, one by one.
* * * *
The next day at work, she walked to the front desk and handed Meredith a paper.
“What’s this?”
“It’s my letter of interest for Caroline’s position.”
“Oh,” Meredith said. She blinked. “I didn’t know you were considering the position.”
“I am.”
“Uh. As soon as we have the times ready for the interviews, I’ll let you know.”
“Thank you,” Roxy replied. As she turned to leave, she noticed the look on Meredith’s face. She didn’t have a chance in hell to get that job.
Chapter 33
Madison sat at her kitchen table. She was beside herself. Her entire day at work she had been short with people and crabby. She knew it was all about Justin. He was going to leave in a few days. Part of her couldn’t believe he would actually go. She toyed with the idea of telling him if he left, not to come back. It was a silly effort, she knew. It was a job. He had bills to pay, same as her. Yet, she was fearful he may never return. Her heart began to pound in her chest. Her hands trembled. A wave of fear swept through her. Madison recognized the anxiety attack. She forced herself to focus on her breathing; deep and slow. She focused on that and nothing else. Madison shut her eyes tightly, picturing the air coming into her lungs, her lungs expanding, slowly inflating. Growing full, like a balloon. Hold 1-2-3-4-5. Exhale slowly. Another...
Several minutes later Madison felt calm. She chided herself for loss of control. Not too many months ago, she was single and fine! If Justin left her, she would get over it, like the men before him. She wasn’t sure how, but she could do it.
Princess stood and clawed at her leg.
Madison laughed. She picked up the small dog, holding her close and rubbing noses with her. “We’ll have to get used to sleeping without him. Can we do it?” Princess licked her cheek and yipped. “You’ll always be there, won’t you, Princess. You’ll never leave.”
* * * *
Jacki was leaving the post office, pushing her way out of the swinging door, reading a statement regarding her landscaping material charges. Barely looking up, she got into her truck and started the engine. A knock on her driver’s window startled her.
“Huh?” She looked up quickly and met Elvira’s bright violet eyes. She rolled her window down quickly. Her trembling fingers seemed slow and clumsy. Jacki did her best to cover the emotions that carried on inside her. A zillion questions ran through her mind before she spoke. Do I look all right? Is there any dirt smudged on my face? Does she still care about me after the way I treated her? Does she miss me?
“Hi.”
Elvira grinned back. “Hello, yourself.”
Silence. Elvira glanced towards the road.
Don’t leave! “Hey, how’s it going with the house?”
Elvira shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t think it’s going to happen. Even with all the repairs, extra land comes with the house and it’s more than I anticipated.”
Jacki nodded. You’re so beautiful.
Elvira took a step back. “I better get my mail. It was nice...seeing you.” She turned quickly and entered the small building.
Stupid! Why didn’t I say something! She’s gone! Jacki shoved the gear in reverse and, looking in her rearview mirror, she began to back up. Without moving five feet, she stopped the truck. Elvira’s form came into sight as she pushed on the glass door. Jacki jumped out of the truck and ran up to her. Elvira’s eyes grew wide with surprise.
“Can we...”
Elvira nodded in response.
Jacki picked her up and swung her around in a circle, then kissed her smack on the mouth. Elvira lifted her face in laughter. An elderly woman gave them wide birth as she entered the post office, shaking her head in dismay.
Her house was a short distance away. Even so, Elvira laughed the entire drive as Jacki told her how sorry she was and how much she has missed her. Minutes later, they were on top of her comfy queen size bed, tearing at each other’s clothes in frantic heated passion.
* * * *
Later, cuddling close, giddy from their lovemaking and reconciliation, Jacki hugged Elvira close to her. “Justin is going to Hawaii to work.”
“Oh?”
“Madison’s sick about it. She’s afraid he won’t come back. I’d die if you went to that far away.”
Elvira laughed. “I think you’d come and find me.”
“I probably would.” She sighed. “Let’s buy the house together.”
Elvira sat up. “No! It wasn’t worth the dissension it caused between us.”
“It wasn’t you! It was...”
Elvira laughed. “The house is disastrous! You were truthful...the time and money it would need...”
Jacki sat up and faced Elvira. “We can do it! It might take...” she waved her hand upwards, “forever...but so what?”
Elvira covered her face with her hands, laughing and shaking her head. “Jacki?”
“Yes?”
“When did you decide this?”
“Just now.”
“You are crazy! You hate the house!”
“It will be a love quest.”
Elvira picked up her pillow at swatted her about the head. “You are totally out of it!”
Jacki stuck her arm up, protecting her face from her lover’s pillow bouts. “Wait and see.”
Elvira gave one last whomp with her pillow. “We will see how you feel about it in the morning.”
Chapter 34
Roxy sang along with her radio as she drove to Madison’s. This was her graduation night! She was paying off her last “loan” to Madison and would only need to check in with her every other month to balance her check book. She would be able to quit her second job soon, which would mean more time to spend with Bud. They talked and texted daily now. They had gone out on a few dates. Love was in the air! Good things seemed to be happening, which always caused Roxy a bit of concern. When would the other shoe drop? When would her luck run out?
Roxy pulled into Madison’s driveway and hurried into the house. “Tonight, tonight, the world... How does that go anyway? The song from West Side Story?”
“I don’t know, Roxy,” Madison answered, her tone flat.
Roxy walked to her and gave her a hug. “What’s bothering my best girl?”
Madison offered a slight grin. “My honey is leaving in a few days, remember?”
“Oh, ya.” Roxy made an ugly face. “Sorry.” She looked around the room for Princess and spied her lying in her cage, looking as forlorn as her master.
Madison waved her hand, “Go ahead and sit down. We got business to take care of.”
Roxy took a chair at the table.
“When is that interview for the manager position?”
“Three days!”
“Oh, my. Have you thought about what you are going to say?”
“And do.”
Madison perked up. “Tell me!”
“No. I will come over afterwards. We will have a nice sip of wine.”
“And if you aren’t happy with the way the interview went?”
“We will s
till have a nice sip of wine.”
“Sounds great. On with business. Check book?”
“And money.” Roxy handed Madison the loan amount. “Here ya go, missy.” She pulled her checkbook out of her purse along with the bank statements.
Madison watched as Roxy went through her forms. Thirty-five minutes later, Roxy sighed. “I’m done.”
“I’m so glad we won’t have to do this so often. You have no idea how hard it is for me to sit still when you’re doing this.”
“I know it is. Don’t you think I know you’re practically grinding you teeth wanting to do it yourself?”
Madison laughed. “I suppose after all these years you know me pretty well.” Madison got up and walked into her bedroom, returning with a small gift-wrapped package. “Here’s a small graduation gift.”
Roxy clapped. “I love surprises!” She tore the wrapping off and opened the box. Dollar bills flew out of the box and into the air, causing Roxy to squeal. “What’s this?”
Madison laughed. “Dad helped me fix a spring in the box. Cool, huh?” Bills covered the table. “It’s from the loan money. The interest you paid every time you got another loan for me. I just saved it.”
Roxy appeared dumbfounded. “Wow.”
“You can start a nice little savings account.”
Roxy nodded. Her eyes welled up. She stood and hugged Madison. “I’ve never... My mom never helped me...and you...”
Madison gave her a tight hug in return. “I love you. You’re my best friend.”
Without letting go, Roxy asked, “What about Jacki?”
“Oh. She’s my best friend too.”
“And Sunday?”
“She’s my best friend’s cousin and a best friend too.”
“You are a two-timing bitch.”
“I know. Don’t tell Justin.”
Roxy pulled away and met Madison’s eyes. “He’ll come back.”
Madison nodded and glanced away. “Let’s get your money picked up before Princess thinks it’s hers.”
Madison’s cell phone rang. She answered it and listened to her father’s deep voice. “I don’t know what this world’s a comin’ to.”
Madison rolled her eyes. “It’s Dad,” she mouthed the words to Roxy. “What happened now, Dad?”
“I heard two lesbians were kissing, right in front of the post office, main street a town.”
(Don't Mess With) Clear Lake Women Page 19