by Jane Lark
Mark laughed and rubbed his shoulder. “It does not matter who is most handsome, though, because Peter treated her badly, and you are Happy Harry, the perfect man to fix a shattered heart.”
Harry looked his friend directly in the eye. He had truly had enough of this conversation. “Except that Peter was rich and titled, and do not say that Drew had no money, he is recognised as the son of a marquis, it brings recognition—”
“Except he is not—”
“I said recognised, it is different. I have nothing to offer.”
“You are the son of a baron.”
The third son of a family who had disowned him. “That is as valueless as she and her family think me. Now might we end this conversation. The truth is, I was rejected by her and her father. Enough.”
Mark smiled, then suddenly stood up. “What do you say to finding somewhere we might play billiards?”
~
When Drew walked across the room in White’s, he looked about the chairs for Mark and Harry. He had not received a reply to his letter.
“Drew! Here!” Mark had stood up.
Drew lifted his hand and walked over. He could not see Harry. “Where is Harry?” he asked when he drew closer.
“Not speaking to you, my friend.” Mark held out his hand to shake Drew’s, while his voice and his expression mocked him. That was normally Harry’s role.
“Why?” Drew asked as he sat down.
“I believe you are dipping a spoon into his life and stirring things up. You have Emily with you at home…”
Drew smiled, then laughed. “I do. And just to know that has put him off being near me… Is he sulking?”
“He is angry.”
Surprise needled Drew. “Over what?”
“Emily, and her father, have rejected his interest.”
A frown crumpled Drew’s brow. She had blushed. She had looked awkward at the mention of Harry’s name. She had not looked as though she had rejected Harry. But damn, if she had; Drew’s letter had been crass.
“Why?” Mark leaned back as the coffee Drew had ordered arrived. The man put it down on a table between Drew and Mark. When he walked away, Mark answered, “He said it was something to do with wealth and titles.”
Drew frowned again. Emily’s family had no link to the aristocracy at all. But wealth, they had wealth, a thing that Harry lacked. Drew knew what it was to lack wealth. The worthlessness. The sense of being unable to compare. But Harry at least had five-hundred a year, he had more than nothing, and to many, five-hundred a year, was a fortune. The problem was they had all lived Brooke’s lifestyle for years and Harry had probably spent the five-hundred a year five hundred times over.
“Do you know where he is?”
Mark laughed. “I know, but I am not supposed to tell you.”
“Do not be ridiculous.”
The light in Mark’s eyes said he was laughing at Drew internally, in a very Harry like way. “I made a promise.”
“Break it. It is in his interest.” Drew leant forward picked up the coffee that had been poured and drank the whole cup.
When Drew straightened, Mark’s gaze caught on his. “Very well. He is at home, because he knew if you went looking for him you would never think to look for him there.”
Drew laughed—now that was Harry being like Harry. “Well then, we are visiting Harry at home.”
~
Someone knocked on the door of Harry’s sitting room. It was a heavy knock too, as though the person was angry. Debtors…
Harry remained in his chair, silent.
“Harry, I know you are in there, Mark told me!”
Harry shut his eyes and sighed. Damn Mark.
“Harry!”
He stood up, walked to the door, and opened it, leaning an arm on the frame blocking Drew’s entrance. “Hello. Pray what brings you here?”
Drew recoiled, frowning at the out-of-character sharpness of Harry’s response. But it took him no more than a second to recover. “You brought me here by not coming to the club. Step back and let us in.” Mark stood behind Drew.
“I am not in the mood for company.” He was in a self-pitying, bitter mood today.
“If you allow me in perhaps by the end of the conversation you may be in a better mood.”
“Or I may have throttled you.”
“I’ll take the risk; step back.”
Harry’s arm fell from the doorframe and he pushed the door wider, then stepped back so Drew and Mark could walk past him.
As Mark passed, he threw Harry a grin.
Harry said, “Traitor.”
Mark laughed with no evidence of regret or conscience.
Drew took off his hat and spun it on to the table when he past it, then sat in one of Harry’s chairs. Harry only had two chairs.
Mark dropped his hat down too.
“Sit down.” Drew leant forward and tapped the other chair.
“Is this an interrogation?”
“No. Do you not remember the days on which you helped me? I recall them very well. When I won Mary, it was the campaign of us all. If you want Emily then I am here to help you.”
“I cannot force her to like me.” He sat down in the chair facing Drew, all the energy and will to fight draining out of him.
“She likes you now. You have no need to force her,” Drew stated.
“Perhaps, but not enough to marry me,” Harry answered flatly.
“I have been frowning a lot today over you. Do you really not remember how Mary was with me?”
“She always liked you, it was her family that did not.”
“But she did not love me. I persuaded her to love me, and even now she still does.”
“She is different to Emily.”
“How? You have agreed that Emily likes you.”
“Mary is not Emily, this is different.”
“And you are in a self-affronting mood. Do you not care enough to battle for her?”
“There is no point.”
“She blushes whenever she hears your name.”
Harry felt himself damned well blush.
Drew rocked back in the chair and bloody laughed.
Harry leant forward and swiped at his arm.
Mark started laughing too.
Harry looked up. Mark was leaning back against the windowsill, his hands gripping the sill on either side of his hips. Harry glared at him.
“So sensitive,” Mark mocked.
“So damned well stupid,” Drew added. “She likes you far more than a little, and far more than she ever liked Peter. She never blushed when I spoke of him…”
“Yet she accepted his proposal.”
Drew sighed. Then his hands rested on his knees as his gaze studied Harry with an intensity Harry was unused to. “What do I do to persuade you? She is yours for the taking if you press on—would you rather walk away?”
Harry did not answer.
“I swear to you I can see it in her eyes, she likes you. Does the woman not deserve happiness? What if she might only find that with you?”
Harry still did not answer.
“Have you thought of that?”
No, he had not thought of that.
“She has been miserable. She intended to shut herself away. Since you went to visit her she smiles more, she laughs more, she talks more…”
Drew stopped speaking, as though now trying to make Harry respond through nudging him with silence rather than by questions.
Harry did not bend to it.
“Mary is forever telling me how much Emily has come out of herself, and it is not due to Peter. This did not happen then.”
“It is not due to me either. She is not with me, is she? She is there, alone.”
“But are you not glad for her?”
“Yes, of course I am.”
“And what if you could make her even happier?”
Harry sighed.
“And what if that would make you happy again, Harry?”
Harry shut his eyes. He had to stop Drew�
��s train of thought. He opened his eyes. “Her father told me to leave her alone. He told me to leave the town.”
“Why?”
“Because I have debts, I am a liar and worthless—”
“Do not be idiotic. You have more than I had, and Emily has money, just as Mary did. Between the two of you, with your five-hundred a year and her dowry, you can have yourselves set up quite nicely.”
“Except I have debts to pay, and he would not wish her dowry spent on them. Her dowry is not like Mary’s. It would not be enough to pay my debts and set us up.”
Drew stared at him, hard.
What?
“I used to borrow money from Peter. I even borrowed from Peter to elope with Mary—”
“I am not borrowing from Peter to pay my debts.”
“I am not asking you to. I was about to suggest you borrowed from me. I have money now.”
“It is Mary’s, it—”
“It used to be Mary’s brother’s, but what I would loan to you would be the profit I have earned from my farm and my rents.”
Harry stared at him, breathing heavily. Borrow money from Drew… He was not proud. None of them were that. They had been a league of rogues. Joined together at school because they were outcasts, and wished to be with others who never gave a damn about anything but pleasure and fun—because pleasure and fun shut the mind off from other thoughts.
Pride had never been a part of them. Not between the four of them. They had forged this group into an iron wall of protection which meant that within that wall they were free to just be.
Drew, Mark… and, yes, Peter, were his brothers.
“May I pay off your debts?” Drew asked.
“Can you really afford to do so? You do not even know how much they are.”
“They cannot be more than mine were, and if things come to the worst, then I have Mary’s family to fall back on. But I believe, once you have Emily’s dowry to fund it, and Emily as a reason to drive it, you might set yourself up with something that shall have you returning my investment with a handsome profit.”
Harry laughed, the sound erupting from him. “You have more faith in me than I do.” Harry’s vision was suddenly hazy and his nose running. He wiped the back of his hand beneath his nose.
“Harry crying, I never thought I’d see the day,” Mark commented. “So what will you do? Accept him?”
Harry nodded.
“And come home with me. If you are to win her now you will be debt free you must woo her. But remember she and Mary will expect it be classed as courting.”
“Which means no touching,” Mark defined.
Drew looked at Mark, smiling broadly. “I think it is too late for that caution.”
“No!” Mark lifted off the windowsill, straightening, his eyes popping open wide. “No!” He looked at Harry. “You did not say!”
Drew was still smiling, so proud to have been the one to announce it. “I believe it is why she blushes.”
“No!” Mark looked at Harry for the confirmation. “You are my best friend and you did not say!”
“The rules are different with respectable women.”
“You damned well did!” Mark charged.
Drew laughed. Harry looked at him and then laughed too. He should not be laughing. It was only… It was relief releasing itself. No debts… A chance…
Mark walked across the room and thumped him on the shoulder. “Why did you not say?”
“To save her modesty.”
“I shall not breathe a word.” Mark’s hand now gripped his shoulder.
Drew stood up, and rubbed his gloved hands together. “Shall we go and pay your debts? Believe me, that is a wonderful day.”
Harry swallowed and stood too. He could not believe himself. Within hours, he would be without debt.
Mark turned and grabbed the brim of his hat, picked it up, then put it on.
Drew walked over to collect his hat. “Hurry then, Harry.”
A few minutes later, they left his rooms together, a band of brothers, rogues, again, and former libertines—or for Mark perhaps, a current libertine. Harry slung an arm about Mark’s shoulders.
Drew looked at Mark. “Are you coming home with me too? Shall this be like old times?”
Mark shook his head. “No, I have seen two of you caught in a noose, I have no desire to watch Harry dangling.”
Drew and Harry laughed.
Part Ten
“Harry is in love and is denying it,” Drew whispered in Mary’s ear, as he stroked her hair aside and then tucked it behind her ear. “He was being a fool, but then I recall that I was the same.”
Mary rolled to her side, her palm lying beneath her head, on the pillow, as she looked at Drew. “I recall that too. Do you think Harry will recover from it as you did?”
Their room was dark; they had not left a candle alight but they had left the curtains open. It was light enough with the moonlight for him to see her, a little.
He reached forward and touched his lips to hers for an instant, then pulled away, his heart fuller. His hand settled on the inward curve of her waist at her side. It was the only place in which he could still feel her waist. His hand slipped forward over the mound their child created. The infant moved. “I hope he will recover. How well do you think Emily took me bringing him home?”
“Very badly. You are very naughty. I should be angry with you.”
“But…”
“I love you too much, and it is clear he is in love with Emily. He did not take his eyes off her in the drawing room. So you are forgiven. By me. But not Emily.”
“No, I think it might take a few more days for Emily to forgive me.”
“You think she will?”
“She will when she has fallen for Harry’s courting.”
“As I did for your courting?”
They laughed quietly, because she must have recalled his methods of courting as much as he had. Those methods had worked well enough, though, in the end.
“I have high hopes for them,” he answered. “They deserve a happiness of the quality that I have found.”
“And it is only you who has found it…”
He smiled and then corrected, “That we have found.”
“Better,” she answered, reaching forward to kiss him.
His hand lifted and slid into her dark hair.
~
Emily breathed steadily, trying not to allow the sense of panic that threatened to engulf her take hold.
Harry had walked into the drawing room with Drew, tapping his hat against his leg as he’d held the other side of the brim, as though it was quite, quite normal for him to be here.
“Hello, Emily.” His welcome still echoed through her soul. She had not been ready to face him. She had not expected to see him.
Drew had gone to town on business and was meant to return for dinner. He had returned late, with Harry.
Emily’s heartbeat raced.
Harry was asleep in a room opposite hers, only just across the hall. Drew’s and Mary’s home was larger than her parents but not huge. Harry was only yards away.
Her tongue lifted to the roof of her mouth and she swallowed, trying to moisten her throat.
There was an odd emptiness inside her. Need. Longing… She had looked at him and felt… Confused. Lonely. Glad… Glad to see him. He had smiled and her stomach had rolled a summersault, turning everything topsy-turvy.
All the sensations she had known in the barley field were within her, screaming—and warming her blood like there were cinders alight and glowing inside her. If air reached the cinders, they would catch into flames.
She shut her eyes and thought about the flames…
~
Harry sighed into the air above him. He was lying on his back, not in a position that welcomed sleep, but sleep was as far away as the moon outside. Emily slept in the room opposite his. He would say the sleeping arrangements had been orchestrated, except that Drew and Mary only had a small number of rooms.
He itched to get out of bed and walk across the hall—only yards.
His heart pulsed in a hard, quick rhythm.
She had blushed when he had walked into the drawing room. Just as Drew had said, it had the appearance of embarrassment and emotion mixed.
What emotion?
She had been quiet at first, not speaking to him. But then he’d said something that amused her and she had smiled suddenly, broadly, as though she had only then remembered that he could make her laugh. From that moment on she had laughed and smiled. Drew had been right in that too—she did smile and laugh more openly and often. Then she had spoken too, in a more animated way.
But she had been more confident at home, in Seend, too—in a field of barley.
The smells returned to him and the feel of her body as a blanket over him, sheathing him.
Then he remembered the blood.
His heart hurt.
How was it possible to care so much for a woman who did not feel the same?
But he was without debt. He would sleep tonight a man with no shadow behind him, with no fear of a debtors’ jail haunting his dreams.
He smiled into the darkness.
~
It was raining. Harry braced his forearm on the window, and his forehead leant against it.
He was dressed and ready to walk down to break his fast, but the sound of the rain on the window had made him turn to look. It was raining hard. There would be no borrowing Drew’s curricle, or walking through the gardens… There would be no privacy.
A sigh slipped through his lips. His head lifted, then his arm fell as he turned away from the window. He walked across the room, to the door. It was probably better. It was probably too soon to urge her into anything.
Yet just to be alone with her… How he looked forward to that.
When he walked into the dining room, Emily was already there. Drew sat at one end of the table, Mary at the other and Emily beside Caro. They had left an empty chair on the far side of the table for him.
He bowed his head in greeting. “Caroline.” He had not seen her the day before. “Emily.” Her head spun and she smiled at him, her brown eyes gleaming, despite the dull day. “Mary, Drew.” He looked from one to the other.