“I suppose you’re right. But it showed me a side of myself, I didn’t like.” After placing the folded paper sacks in the pantry, she stretched and yawned to deceive him. “Well, that’s all of the groceries put away. I think I’ll take a long bubble bath, curl up with a book and cup of hot herbal tea, and relax.”
“In that case, I’ll get moving.”
“Bye, Peter, and thanks for helping with the groceries.”
After he left, she leaned against the kitchen counter and frowned. If she wasn’t mistaken or grasping for straws, Peter had looked strange for a moment when she mentioned drugs and her erratic behavior. The fact Jason—a physician—also suspected she had been tricked with them convinced her she was wise to be wary of Peter and Doctor Hines, and even Inez. She also believed that Peter had requested those unusual blood tests, either from knowing about his father’s sexual antics or from distrusting her. Hines certainly was nervous when she questioned him about them. And, Johnson and Dredger had seemed tense and alert when she saw them, as if they were concealing something from her. Jason had been right and kind to caution her about those men.
On Tuesday and Wednesday, Cass went shopping for a new wardrobe, and took those items selected by Tom to a secondhand store in Brunswick and sold them. She decided not to do any more redecorating of the house in case she decided to move soon.
Cass ate with Peter on Wednesday night at Bennie’s Red Barn on St. Simons Island. Afterward, she let him take her to Ziggy Mahoney’s which was adjacent to the restaurant. Reluctant to spend private time with him at home, she lingered there with him for hours and listened to the male duo perform old hits from the 1940’s up to the sixties. She especially liked Keenan’s voice and delivery style; he sang several of her country western and rock and roll favorites upon request and even visited their table during a rest break to chat for a while.
She shagged with Peter twice and allowed him to think he had her fooled, but she was relieved they didn’t slow dance together. Actually, she was having a good time at Ziggy Mahoney’s, partly because she was meeting Peter’s concealed challenge head-on, and partly because she enjoyed the music.
As Peter lazed back in his chair, sipped his drink, and tuned out the music, he made mental plans for his business trip tomorrow. There were a few problems he had to straighten out with the Los Angeles export/import company, problems if left unresolved could get him in to deep trouble with the law.
* * *
On Thursday morning after Mary arrived to clean the house, Cass and Linda left to go shopping, have lunch, and spend the next few hours at a beauty spa getting groomed and pampered.
For a while, they chatted about Linda’s job on Jekyll Island that began tomorrow and her just-completed one, talked about how Cass was feeling and what she had been doing with the house and herself, and planned future outings.
“How are Jason and Peter doing?” Linda asked.
Cass lowered her fork. “Funny you should mention them in the same sentence. Did you know about the past trouble between them?”
Linda leaned forward and asked, “What trouble?”
Cass surmised from the nurse’s reaction that Linda was uninformed in that area. “Do you know why Jason and Brenda got divorced?”
“No, but, knowing Jason, I assumed it was her fault.”
“How about it was hers and Peter’s? Adultery,” Cass clarified, then watched the blond gape at her in astonishment. “That’s right, they were lovers for three months, over a year ago.”
“Are you sure? Who told you?”
“Peter and Jason. This conversation must stay strictly between us.”
“It will, Cass; you can trust me.”
“I believe so; that’s why I’m telling you this, and for another reason which I’ll explain in a minute. Since you know Jason so well, you can give me advice about him.” Cass related what the two men had told her.
“That’s so incredible and shocking, I don’t know what to say. Heavens, how Jason must have suffered from what they did to him. I never liked Brenda and didn’t believe she was good enough for him. The little bitch snared him while he was vulnerable and still grieving over Joan’s loss.”
Cass took a calming breath, then asked her friend, “Do you think Jason still grieves over Joan?”
“Not anymore. I mean, I think he’s over her loss, but I guess he still has feelings for her. They were married for a long time and have children, so that would be natural. I didn’t know her; she was gone before I met Jason, but I’ve heard she was a good woman. Why the frown?”
“This part is probably none of my business, Linda, but I care about you and feel I have to warn you about Peter.” Cass saw that her friend looked confused by the sudden change in topics. “I don’t trust him, but I have to pretend to be friends with him for personal and business reasons, at least for a while longer. I think the gossip about him is true; in fact, I think he’s worse than his colorful reputation paints him to be. He’s cunning and skilled at fooling people; he even tricked me for a while. I know you’re attracted to him, but I don’t want you getting hurt by him.”
“I’m sure you’re right, Cass, and I appreciate your concern and caution. I guess I knew it all along, but I sort of got dazed for a while.”
“It gets worse, Linda: I think he was slipping drugs into my food and drinks; I believe that’s why I almost went off the deep end. Jason agrees.”
“So do I, your reaction just wasn’t natural. What’are you going to do about it?”
“There’s nothing I can do without proof, and Peter isn’t one to make a mistake of leaving anything lying around for me to find and use. I’ll just have to accept that part, ignore it, and make sure it doesn’t happen again. Actually, I don’t think it will; I think he just needed me looped for a short period while he checked out Tom’s will and businesses.”
“I don’t know Doctor Hines well, but I’ve heard rumors about him, and I don’t like him. He gives me the creeps, and I’m positive he was overdosing you on medication. But as you said, without evidence, your hands are tied. You certainly can’t make accusations against either one without it.”
“I know, but at least Jason is taking care of me now. That’s the other thing I need to discuss with you. I…we…How do I put this?”
Linda grinned. “You two are attracted to each other and want to start dating?”
“Is it that obvious?” Cass worried aloud.
“Only to me because I was around you two so much and I got to know you so well. Don’t believe what Peter told you about him. Jason is a good and honorable man, Cass; you can trust him. I truly believe he’s falling in love with you, and I think you two are perfect for each other.”
“But our timing is lousy. I mean, I’ve only been a widow for two months. I didn’t intend for this to happen, and surely not so soon.”
“Love doesn’t read a calendar or clock, Cass. It’s rare to find the perfect man, so don’t risk losing him because of misplaced fears.”
“That’s what my heart says, but my head warns me about gossip.”
“No matter what you say or do, Cass, people are going to gossip about something. Just be discreet and you’ll be fine.”
“I suppose it’s obvious to you my marriage to Tom was a mistake. I was trying to make the best of it. I shouldn’t have allowed Tom to dazzle me and convince me to marry him. I was alone and lonely, I wanted children and a home. I married for all the wrong reasons.”
“I know what you mean; I’ve almost settled for men who weren’t right for me on several occasions. I probably would have if those men hadn’t changed their minds and walked out on me. Lordy, Cass, I’m twenty-seven and I’ve never been married and see no good prospects in sight!”
“It’s better to not be married or be divorced, perhaps with children, from some sorry bastard who tricked and betrayed you. Would you believe Brad came to see me last Friday?” Cass related her ex-husband’s visit and motive and how Peter supposedly rescued her. “At least
I can be grateful to Peter for that favor. He so terrified Brad that he’ll never bother me again.”
“That’s good news.”
“Oh, yes, I received other good news this week: the police have halted their investigation into Tom’s death and ruled it an accident.”
“That’s wonderful! No more stress from those angles.”
“Now, all I have to deal with are Peter and Jason.” And Tom’s will. “Have you ever met Jason’s children?”
“Yes, and they’re wonderful. You’ll like them and they’ll adore you. In fact, I wouldn’t mind snagging Stacey for myself, even if he is a few years younger than I am. He’s terrific like his father; and a real hunk.”
“Maybe you can snare him; Jason said he isn’t involved with anyone.”
“That would be a smidgen difficult since we live so far apart.”
“Well, he does come to visit his father, doesn’t he?”
“Yes, but I’m rarely around when he does.”
“Well, we’ll have to make certain you are around in the future.”
“Any help you can supply in that area will be appreciated.”
“Do you think Jason would want another child since his are grown?”
“He’s an excellent father and loves kids, so I think so.”
“I know I do. First, I need to see how Jason feels about having more children. I’ve certainly learned how important it is to discuss something like that early in a relationship. Do you know anything about him I should be warned about?”
“No, he’s as close to being perfect as a man can get, in my opinion.”
“Maybe that’s what scares me a little, or a lot: I’m afraid to trust my judgment of him because I’ve been so wrong about my past choices.”
“This time, trust your feelings and intuition, Cass; he’s a jewel.”
“Well, we’d better pay our bill and get moving to the beauty spa or we’ll be late for our appointment.”
What she was about to do that night would be anything but fun for Cass, yet she hoped the unpleasant task would give her needed clues about Tom and possibly about Peter. She sat on her bed with pillows propped behind her back, her knees raised, and Tom’s diary resting against her thighs. She had used a screwdriver to break its lock and not felt the least bit guilty for invading his privacy.
She perused many entries over a year’s time period. Tom’s recordings about his wicked actions were almost all short and choppy, often crude, and featured a scoring system of one-toten and listed the types of “skills” his secret lovers possessed. She flipped from page to page, repulsed and shocked by what she read, but felt she had to learn the truth about the dark stranger who’d been her husband for over two years. Most of the entries for June through September seemed to correspond with the episodes she’d seen on the videotape. Then she got a few surprises.
October 5: Marlee: 9, Did first drugs today. Great sex. Didn’t like loss of control. Never again.
“So, even you have your limits. That’s a shock.”
November 6: Going home. Must be crazy to risk losing Cass. Love her and need her more than anybody in my life. Can’t help myself. Forbidden sex is like a potent and addicting drug.
“You had a strange way of proving you loved and needed me, you bastard! Am I supposed to feel sorry for you because you were an uncontrollable sex addict? Well, I don’t and never will.”
November 7: my sweet Cass, always an 11+.
“How nice,” she scoffed in a sacastic tone. “I rated over a ten.”
December 19: Took huge chance today with Dave in my gym. Next time, I’ll let him do me in his office. Maybe that sexy male nurse of his will join us for a threesome. Dave says he’s great.
“Dave? Are you possibly talking about David Hines? You two did those wicked things here in our home? You used those benches for…Oh, my heavens, and I’ve been lying on them while exercising! I’ll have to scrub and sanitize them tomorrow.”
January 13: Dave wants another shot at me. Said no. Too risky; he’s too promiscuous. What a fucking shame!
“And that filthy doctor touched me and treated me!”
February 9: Must give up other life and fight weakness for it. If lost Cass, would kill me. Mine forever, even after death. Would die if she ever cheated on me, but she never would. She’s the only person who loves me for myself, but she would never understand my weaknesses.
“For once, Thomas Grantham, you’re absolutely right!”
February 18: Marlee: 7 today. I just wasn’t into it and distracted.
February 21: I know Cass wants a child and she deserves one. Maybe it’s a good idea and timing is right this summer. Must get treatment if necessary to change, but must stop taking chances. Need to get closer to Peter; he’s becoming too much like me.
“I’m glad I don’t have your child, you sorry bastard!”
March 3: Doing Gretchen for last time this weekend. Love and need Cass more than these pleasures. No more risks. Get rid of tapes and journal. Burn all names, addresses, and phone numbers. Never again.
“So, you were on your last sordid fling, were you?” Cass muttered in disgust. “Perhaps fate was kind to me by taking you away before you had the chance to dupe me further and before we could have a child.”
Cass closed the book and stared at its black leather cover and broken lock. How strange it was, she thought, that Thomas Ethan Grantham had kept a diary like a teenage girl, and how risky it was of him to make such detrimental recordings for someone to find. Had Tom been mentally ill, so sick in mind that he truly wasn’t responsible for his actions? Had he been crying out for help?
Who were you, Thomas Grantham? Cass agonized. What were you? What would Peter pay to make certain this diary is burned? Could I use it to force him to make a settlement with me to get what I deserve, to let me outwit Tom? I wonder how much Peter is like you. If he’s ignorant of your evil, this discovery could hurt him deeply, though he probably doesn’t deserve my help and compassion. How badly do I want at least part of my inheritance? Enough to do anything necessary to obtain it? Enough to risk enraging Peter to perhaps a dangerous degree? I’d better think about those questions seriously, because I’ll have to act on their answers soon.
Friday evening and fortuitously before Peter came home from work, Cass left her house at a little before six o’clock to drive to Jason’s. She wondered what was in store for them tonight.
Chapter Nineteen
Cass settled herself on a thick multi-striped coverlet that Jason had spread inside the widow’s walk railing atop his home. As he poured two glasses of wine, she reflected on how they had prepared supper together in his spacious but cozy kitchen and had cleaned up afterward as a team. Broiled swordfish steaks, baked potatoes, rolls, and a garden salad had never tasted better; nor had she ever found routine chores to be more stimulating. They had taken a stroll on the beach, daring to hold hands in their solitude on the sand, then climbed the exterior spiral steps to enjoy the view and each other’s company. The sun had set and nighttime engulfed them, but a full moon and countless stars gave soft light. A cooling breeze with intermingled floral and ocean scents wafted over them. They were positioned to the rear of his house where the gentle slope of its roof, many tall trees, and the one-storied adjacent dwellings prevented them from being visible to inquisitive eyes and minds.
As Cass took the glass of blush wine from Jason, she smiled and said, “Thanks. This is wonderful, Jason, so tranquil and lovely. I think I could sleep up here.”
“Yep, a perfect night for stargazing. And romancing,” he added.
Cass saw his eyes brighten. He appeared to be trying to look and sound calm, but she perceived his suspense and anticipation. Those same feelings assailed her. So did the annoying question of should she relent to her rampant desires. She had been the one to make the restrictive rules for their relationship, but she yearned to break them. Over the rim of an upturned glass, she watched him lick his lips after he sipped some wine, shift his position
to be closer to her, and let his adoring gaze roam her face. She knew she was weakening, and suddenly she didn’t care, couldn’t retreat. “Careful, Doc.”
Jason asked, “Why? I’m in no danger of falling.” He watched her tease manicured nails over his forearm and was enthralled by her magnetic allure. He yearned to undress her and make love to her.
Cass lifted her right hand and toyed with a windblown lock of tawny hair. “I meant, be careful of how you look at me or I might seduce you. Besides, I thought you already had fallen, fallen for me.”
“I have; I took a hard and fast tumble the first time I met you. I’m more than willing to become putty in your lovely hands.” He captured the empty one and kissed each fingertip, then its palm several times.
Cass warmed and quivered in desire. “If anyone on this roof is a lump of susceptible putty, Doc, it’s me. You got me here, didn’t you?”
“I’m glad you came and I’m overjoyed you trust me. I love you, Cass.”
Please convince me that’s true and you aren’t a perilous stranger. Just above a whisper, she said, “But you hardly know me, Jason.”
“I know you well enough to know I love you and want you.” He noticed she was breathing more quickly now, and her cheeks were flushed. Her eyes glowed with what looked like passion as she held his gaze. It was a struggle not to yank her into his arms and kiss her, but he wanted her to make the first move tonight to make certain he didn’t overstep his bounds.
Cass wanted Jason Burkman with every fiber of her being. Right or wrong, wise or foolish, she must have him again tonight, here and now. She set aside her glass and slipped a leg over his hips to sit across his lap. She clasped his handsome face between her hands, gazed into his blue eyes, and said, “I want you and need you.” She kissed him with boldness and fierce longing.
Jason’s arms banded her back and he returned the kiss with fervor. He realized she craved him as much as he craved her. She was giving him permission to pursue her. He pulled her more tightly against him as his lips feasted on her mouth, face, ears, and throat. As she erotically rubbed her body against his, his trembling fingers unfastened her blouse, peeled it off, and cast it aside. He did the same with her bra, then nestled his face between her breast, his tongue teasing the sweet skin there before wandering to taste each taut, waiting nipple. His hands caressed her sleek bare back and delighted in the warmth and silkiness of her skin.
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