by Braxton Cole
“Is that a good idea?” I wanted to ask more probing questions, like exactly how kinky Richard was and what he would expect of Rachel. Not that I was the keeper of her vagina, but still.
Luca nodded carefully. He clearly wanted to discuss this more thoroughly as well. That would have to wait for later. “He's a good man.”
“Well, I hope we get to meet him some day.” My mom contributed to the conversation, oblivious to the undercurrents of tension rolling between me and Luca. And me and Gloria. I was never sure if my mom was purposefully unaware, or if she really was clueless.
“I don't know, Mom. That's a lot of pressure on one might-happen meeting,” I said.
Right about now would be when Ricky would normally cut in with some asshattish comment about my date, said in Spanish of course. He'd tried that once with Luca and been sufficiently mortified and humbled when Luca had answered for me. His grandmother taught him Spanish as a boy, but spoke primarily English. As a result, Luca was beautifully fluent, but had virtually no accent. It was a tricky combination and a good lesson for Ricky. Still, I sometimes missed his insights.
“Ricky's taking me to see Wisin and Yandal later this month.” Gloria looked at Ricky the way she'd been looking at Luca a second ago and Ricky kissed her cheek.
“Oh, that's nice.” My mom wasn't really up on the Mexican club music scene, so that was the closest she would get to enthusiasm. On the other hand, I was impressed.
“Where are they playing?”
“You want to go?” Luca looked surprised.
“I don't know. Maybe.” I shrugged. Realistically, I would probably feel old and out of place.
“I can look into it.”
“Maybe.” I gripped Luca's inseam a little higher and a little firmer. He was always so ready to please me and it was so different from every other man I'd ever dated that it still caught me off guard at times.
Luca shifted his hand to his lap and placed it on top of mine. He held my hand for the rest of the meal and only released it when it was time to clear the table.
“I'll take care of the dishes, Mrs. Zapata.” Luca collected plates with the efficiency of an experienced waiter before my mom could fully form any protest. After all these months, she should be used to Luca's manner, his quiet authority in every move, but she still looked a little awed when he went all in charge. I didn't blame her.
“Oh, Luca,” my mom actually giggled. “Let me take care of that.” She reached for the plates, but the effort was half-hearted. She knew as well as I did that she wasn't going to dissuade him.
“My grandmother would never forgive me.” Luca smiled and swerved out of my mom's reach. His grandmother had raised him with an equitable distribution of labor. If she cooked, he did dishes, and vice versa. “I'm sure Ricky will be happy to help me.”
Ricky swore under his breath, then looked at my mom with an exaggerated smile. “Of course.”
“Come on, Mom.” I pulled her from the dining room. I did more than my fair share of dishes all week long at work. I'd let Luca do them every night if he wanted. No arguments here.
“What are we supposed to do while they're in there?” My mom wondered aloud as she followed me to the living room. Gloria trailed behind.
“Where did you find Luca? He's a dream.” Gloria sat where she could watch the men working in the kitchen.
I was tempted to tell her the full truth just to watch her squirm, but decided against it since my mom was in the room.
“Luca, honey,” I called over my shoulder without looking away from Gloria. “Would you like to tell Gloria the story of how we met?”
Luca laughed a little too long and hard, but he didn't actually answer.
“What's so funny?” Gloria shifted her focus from me to Luca, then back.
“Oh, goodness. Just tell the girl you met online. It's not that big a deal. That's what young people do these days, right? You kids do everything over the internet,” my mom said.
“Online? Like on through a dating service or something?” Gloria looked ready to pop out a tablet and take notes. I liked her less and less the more time we spent together.
“Something like that.”
Luca brought me a glass of wine at that exact moment and I took it gratefully. I needed a distraction from the memories that went along with the beginning of our relationship. They were definitely not family approved. I swirled the red liquid in the glass, then took a careful drink.
“Would either of you care for a glass?” Luca knew my mom would decline, just like she did every other Sunday. Gloria was an unknown.
“Luca, you know I don't drink that stuff.” My mom said it like she was a teetotaler, too proper to drink. In reality, she just didn't like dry wine. If he'd offered her a blended margarita in a glass with a salted rim, she'd have been all over it.
“I'll take one,” Gloria said.
Luca nodded and kissed my cheek on his way back to the kitchen. Gloria deflated slightly when Ricky brought her glass instead of Luca. I really needed to talk to Ricky about her.
“So, Mari,” Ricky wore that smarmy, annoying little brother smile that always spelled trouble for me. “Luca says the two of you are moving in together soon.”
I paused and took a purposeful drink of my wine before responding. “Luca said that, did he?”
I looked behind me to Luca who stood at the sink with a dishtowel thrown over his shoulder. He did not turn around.
“That's wonderful news, Mari!” My mom actually clapped. Ricky smirked and went back into the kitchen.
“Thanks, mom, but it's also not true.” I kept my gaze on Luca. His shoulders dropped slightly with my announcement.
“Oh.” My mom looked more disappointed than Luca. “Why not?” For a conservative woman, my mom was strangely in favor of people living together before marriage. I imagined it had something to do with the way my father left and how long it had taken her to secure a divorce when she couldn’t find him.
I felt Luca's presence a half second before his hands touched my shoulders. “Mari is being a little stubborn on the matter. But I'll convince her eventually. Don't worry.”
I stiffened and fought the urge to brush Luca's hands away. I hated that he'd brought my family into the conversation about our living arrangements.
“Why don't you want to, baby?” My mom touched my knee lightly. Gloria leaned in eagerly, a little too interested in the answer.
“It's too soon. I'm not ready.”
“But you're not saying no, just not right now?” My mom was excited again. Shit.
I shrugged and Luca squeezed my shoulders. “I guess.”
“You love Luca. I don't understand your hesitation.” My mom announced my love like it was a matter of fact, when in reality I'd never once said the words aloud. I wasn't even sure of their truth. Did I love the amazing things Luca did to my body? Absolutely. Did I love spending time with him? Generally, yes. Right this minute, not so much.
When I didn't respond, my mom turned her attention to Luca. “You love my Mari, don't you?”
I held my breath while I waited for Luca's answer. Now that my mom had put him on the spot, I was much more invested in the answer than I'd realized.
“Very much.” Luca answered simply and I started breathing again.
“Then it's decided.” My mom nodded like love solved everything, even though she'd loved my father and that hadn't gone so well.
Luca patted my arms and kissed the top of my head and returned to the kitchen without further comment.
I gulped down the rest of my wine and wished that Luca had brought the entire bottle instead of one glass.
Chapter 5
“So, about this weekend. . .” We made it all the way until Wednesday before Rachel brought up our weekend liaison. I was impressed with her control. If I'd been in her situation, I would have popped first thing Monday morning.
I lifted a warming dish out of our van and slid it onto the rolling rack on the sidewalk, then reclined agains
t the side of the van. “Yeah?”
“You're okay about it?” She looked like maybe she was the one not okay about it. I really hoped she wasn't on the verge of a massive freak out. We had too solid a friendship, I thought, to fall apart over a little sex.
“Yes, of course. How are you?”
“I think I'm okay. But I also think I should feel guilty or weird or something more than just okay.”
“Why?”
Rachel glanced around to make sure we were still alone. “You're my best friend.”
I nodded slowly. “Right.”
“And we had sex.”
I smiled. “Right again.” Really good sex.
“And your boyfriend was there.”
“Yes.” I absolutely refused to get worked up until I knew exactly where she was going with this.
“And you're really okay with that? With Luca and me. . .”
I laughed. “It was my idea.” And it had been hot as hell to watch.
“And it's not weird for you?”
“Did you have fun?” I asked.
Rachel got this half-turned on look on her face. “Oh, yeah.”
“Me, too. What else is there to worry about?”
“You're sure?”
“I'm sure.” I wanted to hug her, but was afraid she would think I was hitting on her. This was more complicated than I expected.
“Are we going to do it again?” Rachel got the same hopeful, yet horrified look on her face as she did the first time I suggested it.
I shrugged. “It's possible. If we all want to.” But it definitely wouldn't be a regular thing. I waited to see if it was really necessary to point that out.
“Okay. But not now.”
I gave in to the impulse to hug her. Now that we'd agreed on some ground rules, it seemed safe. She returned the hug and held on a little longer than normal.
“I love you.” She whispered the words into my hair with a fierce, I dare you to argue with me tone. It was a lot easier to hear those words from her than Luca. It didn't launch me into an internal debate about the pros and cons of love.
“I love you, too, hon.”
When Rachel released me, she wiped a tear streak from her cheek. My phone vibrated with a new text message. It was from Luca.
How long will you be mad at me?
That wasn't the most accurate question since I wasn't technically mad at him. I was scared to death of what he wanted. And even more scared that my mom thought it was the best idea ever.
I'm not mad at you.
“Luca checking in?” Rachel asked as she resumed unloading the van. My world was so small that it was reasonable to assume that Luca was the only one who would text me. It was either him or Rachel, and since she was standing here, it was obviously him. I needed to make more friends.
“He thinks I'm mad at him,” I muttered. I wasn't in the mood to discuss the details with anyone, especially Rachel, given her current insecurities about us.
Luca replied.
Then why are you ignoring me, sweet girl?
I wasn't really ignoring him. I just hadn't called or texted him since Sunday. I was trying to clear my head.
I'm thinking.
Luca didn't even hesitate. He responded so fast I suspected that he had the message typed out before I answered him.
Whenever you're ready, Mari. I will wait as long as you need.
I smiled at that. As demanding and assuming as Luca could be, he was also respectful and solicitous. Above all, he wanted me to be happy and he would never do anything knowingly to jeopardize that.
I know.
I put my phone away then. He wouldn't say anything else for now. I resumed the job of unloading the truck. We had one rack almost full and another to go. This job was almost big enough to require a third set of hands, but not quite. Business was rocking right on that cusp and had been for a while. We really needed to hire a part-time server, but kept putting it off.
My phone vibrated again and it was so unexpected that I almost dropped the dish in my hand. Luca again.
I really do love you.
It wasn't the way every girl dreams of hearing a declaration of love, but given the inception of our relationship and the fact that we still communicated best via text and email, it was just about perfect. I typed out my response before I could think better of it.
I know. I love you too.
I almost hyperventilated when I saw the words typed out all neat and ready to go. Before I hit send, I deleted the second sentence. Maybe it was true, but that didn't mean I was ready to admit it.
#
A bright red gift bag with white tissue paper sat on my doorstep when I got home. I added it to the bags in my arms and went inside. After work, I'd gone to the mall to burn off a little bit of energy. Shopping wasn't my favorite activity, but new lingerie made it worth it. I'd almost invited Rachel to go with me, but she spent the morning looking at me like she was both afraid and hopeful that I was going to jump on her at any moment. I wanted to wait a couple of more days to see if it sorted itself out, but was afraid that we might need to talk about our relationship again. I was in the same boat as she was, not really sure what had changed and what stayed the same. I just knew she was my best friend and I loved her.
And she was really hot in bed, but I shouldn’t have to give up my friend just because I knew what she looked like as she came.
Maybe this was more complicated than I was willing to admit.
I dropped my shopping bags onto the couch and carried the gift bag into the kitchen with me, where I set it on the table. First a glass of wine, then I'd see what the mystery bag held for me. I filled the glass slightly fuller than conventionally encouraged and drank enough to take it down to the normal fill line. I needed to either buy more wine or break down and talk to Luca soon.
The bag held two wrapped packages and a folded piece of paper. The first package was labeled THURSDAY NIGHT, the second FRIDAY MORNING and the paper FRIDAY NIGHT. There was no indication who it was from, but I recognized the strong block lettering as Luca's. He'd decided he was forgiven enough to assume we were spending the weekend together as usual.
I laid all the items out on the table and poured more wine. As I was about to open the box labeled THURSDAY NIGHT, my phone rang. I answered without looking, assuming it was Luca.
“I'm not sure I'm ready to talk to you yet. Gifts aren't going to change that.” I sipped my wine and waited for Luca's sexy voice to tell me to stop being petulant. He'd promised more than once to punish me if I didn't behave, but he never truly delivered. If I pushed hard enough, eventually he'd follow through.
“Mari?” Rachel laughed. “What the hell?”
“Sorry. I thought you were Luca.”
“No wonder he thinks you're mad at him.”
“I have every right to be mad at him.” I put the phone on speaker and threw together a quick salad. I wasn't particularly hungry, but knew I wouldn't be able to sleep well if I didn't eat something. “You don't get to be on his side. You don't know what he did.”
“But I know what he can do.” Rachel sounded entirely too lewd for my liking. I wanted to bitch about my presumptuous boyfriend, not gossip about his prowess.
“Not helping.” I sat at the table with my salad, my glass of wine, and examined my gifts. I took Rachel off speaker phone and held the phone up to my ear.
“How mad can you be at a man who loves you and buys you presents? What did he get you?”
“How do you know he loves me?” My heart jumped into my throat. It was bad enough that he said it to my mom, who else had Luca been talking to?
“I can tell by the way he looks at you. The man is completely besotted.”
“Who the hell says besotted?” If Rachel were with me, I would have totally thrown a piece of lettuce at her over that one.
“Whatever. He is and you know it,” Rachel dismissed my criticism.
“I wish people would stop saying that,” I grumbled.
“Who els
e said it?” Rachel asked.
“He did.”
Rachel gasped appropriately. She was a good enough friend to know how much Luca saying the big L word would freak me out.
“Wow,” she said quietly.
“Yeah, wow. To my mom, no less.” My glass of wine disappeared at an alarming rate. I refilled it.
“Wait, he told your mom he loves her?” Sometimes Rachel was a little ditsy.
“No, freak. He told my mom that he loves me,” I clarified.
“Before he told you?”
“She asked him if he loved me. He said yes.” Very much. The absolute certainty in Luca's voice stuck with me more than anything. He said it like a man with conviction, without doubt. How was that possible when all I felt was uncertainty? He knew exactly how he felt and what he wanted and had no fear about saying it. I was terrified that everything would slip through my hands if I so much as exhaled wrong. Things were too good between us. I didn't want it to change even a little bit.
Saying I love you was a big damn change.
“Wow.” Rachel lacked creativity when stunned.
“Can we change the subject?”
“Tell me about the gifts.” Rachel shifted topics like a good friend does.
“Can we talk about something besides Luca?” I hadn't been able to turn off the constant loop of him in my brain, but maybe Rachel would be able to distract me. At least I was willing to try.
“I have a date this Saturday.” Rachel sounded reluctant to share, like she wanted to talk about it but was afraid of my reaction. Strange, considering she had lots of dates and my reaction was usually the same. I thought she spent too much time and energy on men who weren't worth her time.
“And?” I worked on my salad. Rachel knew me well enough that she could listen to me chew lettuce while we talked. “You have dates all the time.”
“With a woman.” Rachel said the words really fast and there was a delay between her speaking and me understanding.
“Well, that's new.”
“Last weekend made me think. I realized I was being too. . .rigid. I don't want to limit my options.”
I totally enjoyed myself with Rachel and Luca, but I wasn't ready to switch teams. I wondered what was different for her. Maybe if I were single I’d react like she was. “I don't know what to say.” She'd rendered me speechless. I obviously didn't care if she was a lesbian, but I definitely hadn't expected it. Historically, nobody loved cock as much as her.