The Giant Rumble

by Jim Eldridge

  ‘We have to find a way to get out of here,’ said Princess Ava.

  ‘I’ve got an idea,’ said Bendy Wendy. And then she began to shout, ‘Help! Help! The prisoners are escaping!’

  The others stared at her.

  ‘What are you doing?’ demanded Princess Ava.

  Wendy ignored her and kept shouting, ‘Help! Help!’

  The door of the cell was unlocked and in burst Lightning Rawr and Mr Belly.

  ‘What’s all this shouting?’ demanded Mr Belly angrily.

  ‘If you don’t shut up,’ shouted Rawr, ‘I’ll send a burst of lightning in there and fry the lot of you!’

  And then suddenly the expression on his face changed from a scowl to a silly smile, and then he began to laugh.

  Mr Belly turned to him, puzzled.

  ‘What’s so funny?’ he demanded.

  And then, he too began to laugh.

  It was then that the others saw that Bendy Wendy had slid her extraordinarily long arms through the bars and right up to Mr Belly and Lightning Rawr, and was tickling them under the arms.

  ‘Stop!’ begged Lightning Rawr, and he raised his hands to try and fire off a lightning bolt, but he was laughing so much he couldn’t do it. Soon he and Mr Belly were lying on the ground, rolling about laughing, and the ring of keys fell onto the floor.

  There was a flash as Blaze suddenly changed from a phoenix to a tortoise with a thunder-strike symbol on its back. While Bendy Wendy kept Lightning Rawr and Mr Belly helpless by tickling them, the daredevil tortoise nipped through the bars of the cell, picked up the keys and brought them back.

  Milo unlocked the cage and the gang spilled out. They grabbed Mr Belly and Lightning Rawr and threw them into the cage, locking the door.

  ‘There!’ snapped Princess Ava. ‘See how you like being locked up.’

  As the two cheating wrestlers shouted their protest, the team crept out of the cell and stood in the corridor outside, listening.

  ‘That’s some move,’ Milo said admiringly to Bendy Wendy. ‘Have you ever considered wrestling?’

  ‘Sshh!’ said Meenu, as Wendy looked thoughtful.

  ‘Okay,’ said Jack, who had been quickly scanning the corridor, ‘I think we’re in luck. There aren’t any soldiers around.’

  But at that moment, out from the shadows leapt Major Mustard, holding a spear. ‘I thought you’d try something like this.’

  Immediately, the corridor was filled with soldiers, some armed with spears, some with swords, and all with shields as they leapt at the gang.

  The two trolls, Big Rock and Taco Twister, grabbed the nearest soldiers and threw them at others. Robin did his best, kicking out with his hooves.

  The Masked Avenger and Meenu worked as a tag team, tripping the soldiers to knock them over. Milo was impressed to see Bendy Wendy using her long arms as ropes, catching soldiers and banging their heads together, knocking them out.

  ‘Tell me, Wendy,’ said Milo, dodging a soldier who had been tossed in the air by Taco Twister. ‘Do you like to travel?’

  ‘More soldiers coming!’ warned Big Rock, and they saw that at least twenty more soldiers were pouring into the attack.

  ‘Yes, I do,’ said Bendy Wendy as she tickled another soldier until he dropped his weapon.

  ‘We’re outnumbered!’ wailed Robin.

  ‘Do big crowds scare you?’ Milo asked, stomping on a soldier’s foot.

  ‘No – I’ve been performing at the fair for ages now,’ replied Wendy. ‘But what does that have to do with getting us out of here?’

  ‘This time, I’ll make certain you’ll never escape!’ shouted Major Mustard.

  ‘GRAAARRRR!’

  The huge roar filled the narrow corridor, deafening everyone.

  ‘I wish he wouldn’t make that noise,’ complained Robin. ‘It hurts my ears.’

  Where Jack had stood, now there was the massive figure of Thud the Troll, roaring loudly and grabbing up soldiers and hurling them aside as if they were made of paper.

  ‘Wow!’ said Bendy Wendy, awed. ‘Who’s that?’

  ‘That’s Jack,’ said Milo.

  Bendy Wendy looked bewildered.

  ‘I’ll explain later,’ said Milo. ‘Right now, I have another application question for you. How do you fancy joining Waldo’s Wrestling Trolls?’

  The caravan trundled along, pulled by Robin. They’d left the Kingdom of King Nugget far behind them and were headed onwards.

  ‘Looks like we’ve got one more for the team,’ Jack said to Meenu and Princess Ava. They were sitting on the roof of the caravan while Big Rock and Taco Twister ran alongside, jumping and practising kicks. Milo was at the front, holding the reins and talking to Bendy Wendy.

  ‘Bendy Wendy plus Big Rock, Taco Twister, the Masked Avenger and Thud,’ Ava said, ‘make five. We still need five more.’

  ‘Has Bendy Wendy finished Milo’s crazy application form?’ asked Meenu.

  The three shuffled forwards along the roof so they could get nearer to Milo and Bendy Wendy and listen as Milo ticked off her answers.

  ‘Do you snore?’ asked Milo.

  ‘What a silly question,’ snorted Bendy Wendy. ‘What does that have to do with being a wrestler?’

  ‘It’s to find out if you’d keep everyone else awake when we’re camping,’ said Milo.

  ‘I don’t know,’ said Wendy. ‘I can’t hear myself when I’m asleep. How many more of these questions are there?’

  ‘Just a few,’ he replied, pulling the caravan to a halt and jumping down.

  ‘Do you like tacos?’ called Taco Twister, and the others laughed.

  ‘Yes!’ said Wendy.

  Milo pulled out a green scroll titled APPLICATION FORM. ‘Do you agree to the terms and conditions?’

  ‘I don’t know what they are,’ replied Bendy Wendy, sensibly.

  Princess Ava jumped down from the roof and interrupted. ‘Never mind all of Milo’s silliness. The most important question is … can you keep a secret?’ Princess Ava was still in her Masked Avenger costume. If they couldn’t trust Bendy Wendy, they could never reveal Ava’s secret identity.

  Ava took a deep breath and took off her mask.

  Wendy gasped. ‘Yes, Your Royal Highness.’ She bowed her head. ‘I promise to always keep your secret.’ She smiled. ‘And I hope one day to wrestle with you!’

  ‘Welcome,’ declared Milo, ‘to the newest member of Waldo’s Wrestling Trolls!’ And the whole team cheered. The whole team, except for one.

  The cheering stopped as they heard a thud and looked to see Big Rock lying on the ground.

  ‘He tripped over!’ said Jack. ‘I’ve never known Big Rock to do that before.’

  Princess Ava had gone to the fallen Big Rock, and she looked worried.

  ‘Don’t feel good,’ said Big Rock slowly.

  ‘Oh no,’ she said. ‘He’s ill.’

  ‘Ill?’ echoed Milo. ‘Big Rock’s never ill!’

  Taco Twister had joined Ava beside the fallen Big Rock. ‘The Princess is right. Look at those lumps where the spiders bit him.’

  ‘Spiderella!’ said Jack, realising.

  ‘They must have had a special venom,’ said Bendy Wendy. ‘She’ll never tell us how to cure him. There’s no hope.’

  ‘We have to find the cure!’ cried out Jack. ‘We have to!’

  Chapter Six

  The whole group clustered round the fallen Big Rock, anxious.

  ‘None of us were affected,’ said Princess Ava. ‘It must be a disease that only affects trolls.’

  Robin looked at Taco Twister. ‘You’re a troll. Have you ever seen anything like this before?’

  Taco Twister shook his head.

  ‘How come you weren’t taken ill?’ asked Milo.

  ‘None of the spiders bit me,’ said Taco.

  ‘Yes, but you ate them!’ pointed out Jack.

  ‘The Taco-Twister stomach can handle anything!’

  Suddenly Meenu stiffened. ‘Footsteps,’ she whispere
d urgently. She pointed towards the edge of a large rockface. ‘Someone’s coming!’

  ‘What if it’s Major Mustard and his men?’ asked Robin.

  ‘Let me at them!’ growled Princess Ava, and she ran to the edge of the rock.

  ‘I’m with you, Princess!’ said Taco, and they both dropped into a crouch. The rest of the team stood between them and Big Rock, who groaned quietly.

  As the figures appeared round the edge of the rock, Ava and Taco sprang on them, wrestling them to the ground.

  ‘Hey!’ complained the smaller of the two, ducking out of Princess Ava’s grasp. ‘Is that how you welcome an old friend?’

  ‘Grit!’ exclaimed Jack joyously. He ran to the young troll wrestler and threw his arms around her in a hug. ‘It’s so great to see you!’

  ‘When we didn’t hear from you, we thought you hadn’t got our message,’ said Milo.

  ‘I only got it a couple of days ago,’ said Grit. ‘I was at a Troll Wrestling Camp with –’

  ‘Basil!’ burst out Taco Twister delightedly.

  He rushed over to the large troll who’d appeared round the rock with Grit, and the two bumped chests in a happy greeting.

  The new arrival was a troll with flowers sprouting from the soil in all the tiny crevices in his rocky body and a ring of petals around his face.

  ‘My old friend Basil!’ yelled Taco. ‘It’s been too long since we’ve wrestled together.’

  Meenu went to the new arrival and held out her hand. ‘I’m Meenu,’ she said, ‘and I love your costume. All those flowers look lovely.’

  ‘It just sort of grew on me,’ smiled Basil.

  Suddenly Grit saw the figure of Big Rock lying on the ground. ‘What’s happened?’

  Bendy Wendy shook her head. ‘He got bitten by spiders and … ’

  Basil hurried over to Big Rock, who had now turned green.

  ‘It’s called Rockoitus,’ said Basil. ‘If I’m right, in a few seconds his body will go back to its normal colour again … ’

  Even as Basil said the words, the green faded from Big Rock and he was his usual colour once more.

  ‘

  It’s definitely Rockoitus,’ said Basil. He shook his head. ‘It’s very rare. It only affects some trolls. But he’s got it very bad. In about two minutes’ time his tongue is going to start flashing yellow and black, and then he’ll start sneezing spiderwebs. The worst thing is … eventually, he’ll turn completely to stone.’

  ‘Is there a cure?’ asked Jack desperately.

  ‘There is,’ said Basil. ‘But it’s not easy to get hold of the ingredients.’

  ‘What is the cure?’ asked Milo.

  ‘It’s called Mediterranean Anti-Spider Tea. The ingredients are troll ale, six nine-year-old Mediterranean Brussels sprouts –’

  ‘Wow, that stuff is lethal!’ said Taco. ‘It’s so strong it can kill anything.’

  ‘What else?’ asked Jack urgently.

  ‘Volcano dust, a cup of green slime, nine grey pebbles, and six pieces of coal. You stir all that together in a bowl, and give him a spoonful every five hours.’

  ‘Then, team,’ said Milo, standing up straight, ‘you know what we have to do.’

  Jack and Bendy Wendy walked into the small village. They’d found the nine grey pebbles they needed and the green slime, along with the pieces of coal, near where they were camped. But they still needed the other vital ingredients: the volcano dust, the troll ale, and the nine-year-old Mediterranean Brussels sprouts.

  The gang had split up: Grit and Basil, with Robin, were staying with the unconscious Big Rock to take care of him; Milo, Taco Twister, Princess Ava and Meenu had gone in one direction, while Jack, Bendy Wendy and Blaze had headed for the small village they’d seen from a distance.

  ‘Where shall we start?’ asked Bendy Wendy.

  Jack pointed at a shop with a sign over it that said: CRUSHER’S CONVENIENCE STORE. WE SELL EVERYTHING.

  Inside, the shop certainly did seem to have everything. It was the most crowded shop Jack had ever seen. As Jack and Wendy stood there, looking at the different things stacked against the walls and even hanging from the ceiling, a deep voice said, ‘I’m Crusher. Can I help you?’

  They turned and saw that a huge man had appeared behind the counter and was looking at them suspiciously.

  ‘We hope so,’ said Jack.

  Suddenly the man’s expression changed and he pointed at Blaze. ‘Is that a real phoenix?’ he asked excitedly.

  ‘Yes,’ said Jack. ‘Now, what we’re looking for is … ’

  But before he could finish, the huge man had produced a large net and scooped Blaze up in it.

  Immediately, Blaze burst into flames to burn his way out of the net, but the net didn’t burn.

  ‘Elf wire,’ said Crusher. ‘It doesn’t burn.’

  ‘Let my phoenix go!’ shouted Jack angrily.

  Crusher shook his head and gave an evil smile. ‘Mine, now.’

  ‘I think we’ve got a problem,’ whispered Wendy to Jack.

  * * *

  Milo, Ava and Meenu followed Taco into a small café.

  ‘I can’t see how we’re going to get ingredients here.’ Milo frowned.

  ‘It’s worth asking,’ said Taco.

  ‘You’ve only chosen here because they sell tacos,’ said Ava accusingly.

  ‘Do they?’ asked Taco Twister innocently. ‘I hadn’t noticed.’

  ‘No?’ snorted Meenu. ‘You didn’t notice that sign outside that said, Great Tacos Here?’

  ‘Well, I may have done,’ admitted Taco. But then his face lit up in a smile and he pointed at the menu chalked on the wall. ‘But look there! Troll ale!’

  ‘But no Mediterranean Brussels sprouts,’ Ava pointed out.

  ‘One thing at a time,’ said Taco.

  ‘Can I help you?’ asked a voice, opening up a little door between the seating area and the kitchen. It was a man with spikey black hair, tattoos and a big black tongue. He was smiling, but he didn’t look friendly.

  ‘Yes, please,’ said Milo. ‘We’d like some troll ale, please.’

  ‘And tacos!’ added Taco Twister.

  ‘Of course,’ nodded the man, and gave that sneaky smile again. ‘But before I serve you, you must answer my riddle.’

  ‘Why?’ asked Milo, puzzled.

  ‘My name is the Incredible Pulk and, as the best taco maker in the realm, only worthy people are allowed to eat my tacos.’

  ‘We haven’t got time for riddles,’ said Milo impatiently.

  ‘No time for riddles, no service,’ said the man, slamming the little door shut.

  ‘No, wait!’ said Milo, knocking on the door. ‘We’ll answer your riddle.’

  The man peeped his head out of the door, his spikey earrings making him look even more menacing. ‘What word spelled forwards means heavy, and backwards is not?’

  Milo, Ava, Meenu and Taco exchanged bewildered looks.

  ‘I have no idea!’ said Milo.

  ‘That is a pity,’ sneered Pulk. ‘In that case, there’ll be nothing for you here!’

  Jack and Bendy Wendy stood staring at Crusher as he held the blazing net with the burning phoenix inside it in his huge hands. ‘Fire doesn’t burn me.’

  Jack moved towards Crusher, while Bendy Wendy flexed her enormously long arms, ready to snatch the wire net with Blaze inside from the big man’s hands.

  Crusher saw them move and shook his head. ‘If you try anything, I’ll crush this bird between my two hands,’ he threatened. ‘I am very strong. That’s why they call me Crusher.’

  Wendy stepped back.

  ‘That’s better,’ said Crusher. ‘Now, what is it you wanted?’

  ‘We want our phoenix back,’ said Jack.

  The big man laughed. ‘No chance! But I’m fair. I’ll swap it. What would you like?’

  ‘Volcano dust. Troll ale. And nine-year-old Mediterranean Brussels sprouts,’ said Jack.

  ‘You’ll find the volcano dust in a bin ove
r there,’ said Crusher, nodding towards a bin by the door. ‘I don’t sell beer. And the only place you’ll find those particular Brussels sprouts is Lord Veto’s garden.’

  Lord Veto! thought Jack with alarm. Their most villainous enemy!

  Jack and Bendy Wendy went to the bin and Jack began to fill a bag up with volcano dust.

  ‘What are we going to do about Blaze?’ whispered Wendy.

  ‘Let’s get the volcano dust, and then rescue him,’ Jack whispered back.

  * * *

  ‘What word spelled forwards means heavy, and backwards is not?’ groaned Milo. He shook his head. ‘It’s impossible!’

  ‘Give up?’ smiled the Incredible Pulk.

  ‘No!’ shouted Ava angrily.

  ‘Any chance of a taco while we’re working it out?’ asked Taco Twister hopefully.

  Pulk shook his head. ‘No answer, no service.’

  Taco groaned. ‘I’m so hungry I could eat a ton of tacos.’

  ‘That’s it!’ said Meenu. She turned to the Incredible Pulk and said triumphantly, ‘The answer’s a ton.’

  Ava and Milo stared at Meenu in admiration.

  ‘Of course!’ shouted Ava. ‘A ton is “not” backwards. Brilliant!’

  Milo smiled at the Incredible Pulk, whose own sneaky smile had now vanished.

  ‘Drat!’ snarled Pulk.

  Jack sealed the bag with the volcano dust inside it and turned to Crusher, still holding the wire net with Blaze inside. The phoenix’s fire had gone out and he sat inside the net.

  ‘I’ve always wanted a phoenix,’ Crusher said. ‘I love the way they burst into flames.’

  ‘There’s another great trick they do,’ said Jack. ‘One that’s really useful.’

  ‘Oh?’ said Crusher. ‘What’s that?’

  ‘Blaze!’ called Jack. ‘All change!’

  And suddenly the phoenix changed into a fluffy rabbit.

  Crusher stared at the rabbit in the net in horror, and threw it away from him. ‘I can’t stand rabbits!’

  Immediately the rabbit changed again, this time into a big Labrador dog.

  ‘But I love dogs!’ uttered Crusher, and he reached out for it. But before he could grab hold of Blaze, Bendy Wendy had wrapped her long arms around his as if they were elastic.