by Kaci Hart
“Did I just hear you say that I’m cute?”
“You did not, so stop putting words in my mouth. I said you were cute as a little boy.”
He replied with a dismissive laugh.
“Same thing.”
“No it isn’t. For the record, I happen to think all six-year-old boys are cute. Anyway, let’s get off here.”
Sarah got off her horse and led him to a tree where Caleb proceeded to tie both horses down. Beside the tree was a large red and white checkered blanket with a basket on top of it filled with food that she had ready for the picnic. They chatted as she unfolded the blanket and started to take the food out of the basket.
“Sandwiches, drinks, chips, and…is that your mom’s pumpkin pie in there? You know you didn’t have to do this. I mean it was just a lizard.”
“Of course not, but I was really grateful that you dropped everything to help me.”
“Um hello. I was sleeping.”
“Okay so maybe not much but you still came. Besides, we haven’t really had a chance to hang out since you’ve been back. Maybe we can catch up a bit.”
“Yeah. This place reminds me of the old gang. Me, you, Connor, Penny, Brett, Daisy, and Remy. We were like our own little gang. We always said we’d all get houses beside each other here.”
“And you wanted to live beside Daisy because you knew from home economics that she could cook.”
“Hey, I admit that my motives may have been a little off. Can you believe Brett and Penny actually did get married?”
“I know right? It always seemed inevitable though. I got to be her maid of honor.”
"And a beautiful one, I’m sure.”
“So I’ve been told. I was always surprised that you weren’t there.”
Sarah had finished setting everything out by now and she and Caleb sat down on the sheet. She handed him a plate for his food.
“Thanks. So the wedding. I really wanted to come but I had just gotten drafted and was on the bubble. They got married during the preseason and I had to make an impression on the coaches or I was sure I’d get cut. I didn’t think they would think I was serious about it if I left in the middle of an intense competition like we had there.”
“I’m sure they understood, but it would have been nice to see you.”
“Yeah. So I don’t know why I’m asking this now but it’s been bugging me since we talked yesterday. How did you ever end up dating Drew? I mean, nothing against the guy but he doesn’t seem like the kind of guy I figured you would end up with.”
She was surprised that he’d be asking her about Drew. Their relationship in the past certainly never included conversations about other guys or girls.
“Well the story is simple. You know I didn’t date at all when we were kids. Well when I went off to college, I was so focused that I didn’t date much then either. There was the occasional guy who would talk to me but I would keep hearing my dad in my head telling me to get my education first. The one guy I did try to date was just childish. He didn’t take his future seriously, playing video games all day long. When he and I finished it, I figured my dad was right and that school was the most important thing then so I didn’t have any serious relationship for the rest of my school years. Honestly that’s probably what helped me do so well in classes. I had my pick of both medical and veterinary schools at that point in time.”
“Sounds like the opposite of my time in college. Based on what you’re saying, I don’t know if you would have liked college-me that much.”
“Impossible. What’s there not to like?”
“Oh believe me, there’s enough.”
“Sure. Either way, when I came back here, I saw so many of our friends married or in such solid relationships that I started to wonder where my time went. I had my practice and my family and friends, and I am grateful for all of that, but I didn’t have that other part. The whole husband and kids thing. That was when I met Drew one day at your parents’ ranch. He was probably just in the right place at the right time. I didn’t really care that we didn’t have much in common outside of horses. I just wanted a relationship of my own. It wasn’t until I realized just how much I didn’t really look forward to being around him that I knew it was going nowhere.”
“That makes sense. You wanted to let him down before it got too complicated.”
“I wish it would have worked but you saw the results first hand. It’s only been a few weeks though.”
“Ah. No wonder it seemed so fresh. I guess men from here to New York are lucky your dad didn’t let you date otherwise there might have been quite a few more heartbroken guys out there. Who knows, maybe I would have been among the masses.”
“I highly doubt that.”
“If you say so heartbreaker.”
“Stop making me feel bad. I already do that enough every time I see him at your family ranch.”
“I can imagine how awkward it is.”
“No you can’t. Okay, we’ve droned on about me long enough. What about you Mister big shot football star? Any romantic stories in your past?”
“Stories, yes. Romantic, not quite so much. I hope you don’t look at me differently when I say this but I got caught up in the whole NFL party life and girls trying to get with me because I’m a football star. I didn’t go extreme with it but I have made some decisions that I wish I could take back”
“You mean like the swimsuit model, or the drama queen actress or the reality TV girl who obviously wanted to marry you for your money?”
His eyes widened in surprise.
“I guess I forgot who I was talking to. Of course you’d do your homework. Well I know that I’ve strayed a bit from my mom and dad’s values but I’m still a Christian. I know you probably look down on me now. I was never as good of a Christian as you.”
Sarah shook her head and placed her hand on his shoulder.
“You know--I always hate when people say that. Like there is some kind of rating system.”
“Well when I compare myself to people like you, it feels like there is.”
“Then stop comparing. It’s not about you versus me or anybody else. Besides. I have my own skeletons.” She giggled. “Did you know that I once stole a pack of gum from a store in college?”
“Oooh you really broke out of your shell huh? Rebel without a cause and all that. Wait, before I give you too much credit, did you do it on purpose?”
She laughed hard this time.
“You know me too well. It was in the cart and I didn’t see it when I put everything else on the checkout. When I got outside I realized it and ran back inside to pay. But I technically left the store without paying at first. That’s gotta count for something right?”
“Well, for you I guess. You have officially earned the title of a college malcontent.”
“Thank you. So eat your sandwich and stop acting like I’m a goody two-shoes.”
There was brief silence between them as they finished up their food. When he finished his, she saw him reach down to pick one of the pink flowers from the ground. He started to pluck the petals off one by one--letting them float to the ground in the soft breeze.
“You okay Caleb?”
“Yeah. Why do you ask?”
“Because you are plucking flowers like you always used to do when you were thinking. It’s a sign that you are in thought mode.”
“I don’t know. I was just thinking about life. You know sometimes I think that . . . that I was so far gone that I often didn’t really recognize who I was anymore. The guy I was when I left here all those years ago wouldn’t have dated any of those women that you mentioned. Not that they were bad people but I had a special standard of a woman back then. Now I don’t even believe the actions I’ve taken at times. Sitting here talking to you makes me wonder if maybe God let me get injured just to get me to stop and take stock of my life.”
She could tell that it was really bothering him and she hated to see him like that.
“Don’t think that w
ay Caleb.”
“I can’t help it. It’s how I feel.”
“That’s just because of all the pressure you have on yourself. Your teammates want you to perform, fans want to kill you when you don’t and you’re out there giving it your best every day. All under a million cameras that follow your every action. I can’t imagine how that feels when all I have to do is help animals feel better if I can.”
“I know. It’s just that being back here in Stanton Falls just makes me think. Being in nature has given me time to relax and clear my head, you know. Reflect on life and all that. I mean at the rate I’ve been getting injured so much lately, I don’t even know how much of a future I have in football. I haven’t even started to plan for life after that. What’s after football for a guy like me?”
“It’s called living your life Caleb. There is a whole other reality out there outside of football. You ever think about that?”
Caleb picked up another flower, and plucked at it again.
“Yeah. I’d love to have a family. A big one like my grandparents had. I just hadn’t gotten around to it when I first started playing in the pros. Before I knew it, so many years had passed by and I still hadn’t found the right person to settle down with.”
He had gotten to the last petal on the flower and Sarah reached over, plucked it and set it in the palm of his hand. She closed his hand around it and looked him in the eye.
“I understand what you mean and you’ll have it.”
“You really think so?”
“There is not a lot more in life that I am sure of than the truth that anything Caleb Emerson puts his mind to, he will accomplish it.”
Then silence hung in the air for a few seconds.
“Sarah, remember how I said earlier that I had a certain standard in a woman?”
“Yeah.”
“Well I only knew one woman in my entire life that fit that mold and to be honest with you, it’s always been you.”
Whoa.
She hadn’t been expecting that. Sarah cleared her throat.
“Ehem. wow that’s . . . um . . . that’s big. The idea that you see me as the standard to compare other women to. That’s . . . wow.”
“But it’s the truth. Honestly I don’t know why that would be a surprise to you at all. You had to have known that I always liked you. From that first time we met what I saw was a princess that fell off of her horse. I wanted to be the prince that helped you back up. That’s why I asked you to come back to the ranch and learn more.”
She took a second to collect her thoughts and when she knew that her words would make sense, she spoke again.
“I might have had an inkling. Even if I didn’t, Penny made sure I knew. Truthfully, I liked you a lot too.”
“Oh I knew that too. You do know why I never asked you out right?”
“Of course. My dad, also known as the protector of me.”
“Well, back then I hated it more than you could imagine. I wanted to take you to every school dance, every football game, and every Friday night movie but there was no getting around him. I talked to him about it once. I wanted to see if he’d make an exception for me.”
She was surprised.
“You did?”
“Yep. I remember his exact words. ‘Wait until you grow up. If it’s right, she’ll still be here waiting for you. You just gotta know, son, that it’ll be if it’s meant to be.”
She wasn’t sad but she felt her eyes start to well up a bit at her father’s love.
“That sounds just like something daddy would say”.
“To be honest, I’m glad now that he did.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Think about it Sarah. We still would have had to go our separate ways in college. Unless you followed me or I followed you. That wouldn’t have been fair on either of us to give up our dreams.”
She knew he was right. They had both been completely dedicated to their goals. If they had to split focus, something or someone would have had to suffer. That wouldn’t have made anyone happy in the end. The last thing she would have wanted was to resent him or for him to resent her for what could have been.
“So now we’ve both had a chance to live our dreams out, at least a bit. And maybe even start working on new dreams. You have any yet?”
He looked at her for a few seconds before responding.
“I didn’t think so until just this instant but yeah I do. I guess the first question I need to ask is does your father officially let you date now?”
She stuck her tongue out at him and responded.
“He doesn’t have to let me anymore. I’m a rebel now remember? A malcontent.”
“Oh good. For a minute, I thought I was going to have to get your father’s permission first. In that case, what do you think about a malcontent like yourself dating a guy that’s made a few mistakes he wouldn’t mind forgetting?”
She couldn’t believe it. She used to always think about them being an actual couple when they were younger but she never gave it any real shot of happening. As much as it seemed like a dream come true, she had to be cautious.
“That sounds like the beginning of something fun. How would we do that with you going back to play football. I mean you have to be going back soon, don’t you?”
“Yeah but football doesn’t mean we can’t date. You can stay here in Stanton Falls and I can still play in California. We wouldn’t see each other every day while the season was in but you own your business. You can plan vacations when you want. I’d fly you out during the season and I could come visit you sometimes. For the offseason, I’ve been planning on spending a lot more time back here at home anyway. When it’s all done, I don’t want to retire out there. Right here is where I want to be.”
“Well, I would prefer to start a relationship like this off with you here all the time but we do have about a month left before you have to leave again. At least we could start this chapter of our friendship off on the right foot.”
“Is that a yes?”
She smiled.
“Like you really had to ask.”
Chapter Six
Caleb hadn’t been in a church in forever but here he was pulling up to the building with Sarah. His mom had tried to get him to go many times but he regularly declined. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to go. He was just hesitant at first because he figured everyone would judge him.
“Don’t worry about it. Like I said, everyone in town is more proud of you than you know.”
“I hope so.”
It took more bravery for him to get out of the car and go inside than it did to run across the field and catch a pass knowing he was going to get thrown to the ground moments later. That was a piece of cake compared to dealing with the judgmental eyes of people who could be self-righteously religious.
Halfway through the service, he was thankful she had asked him to come. He couldn’t remember feeling more welcomed anywhere in his life than he felt right then. Everyone smiled when he came in. Old friends gave him hugs and people who were his age when he was a kid laughed at how much he’d grown. Not a single person referred to him as ‘football player’ and nobody mentioned his life’s mistakes even though they were prominent fixtures on the highlight reel for a few gossip shows.
It wasn’t just that though. He felt good. For maybe the first time in his life he was glad that he’d come to church. When the pastor gave his altar call, Caleb didn’t go up front--but he said his own silent prayer. He thanked God for all He’d done for him so far and promised to do better. It wasn’t flashy or in front of a bunch of people but it was right for him.
At the end of the service, he and Sarah were walking out when he heard someone call to him from behind.
“Caleb Emerson. Are you trying to sneak out of here without talking to me?”
He turned around and smiled, then extended his hand in greeting.
“Remy. Is it Pastor Remy or Reverend Remy?”
The tall, suit clad man grasped him in a big hug
.
“Either is fine for everyone else but not for you. It’ll always be Remy to you my man.”
“My man? What kind of pastor talks like you?”
“I like to think the cool kind do.”
“This is still blowing my mind when I look at you. Who would have thought that you would be a pastor?” He turned to Sarah for confirmation. “Wasn’t this guy the most low-down of us all?”
She quickly answered.
“Yep.”
Caleb felt Remy’s hand on his shoulder.
“Yes, I am living proof of the fact that God really does work in mysterious ways. Now I have to meet up with some people right now so I need to make this quick. When I saw you two over here the first thing I thought was dinner at my house tonight. What d’ya say?”
Caleb looked at Sarah even though he already knew what she’d say. She always loved being around people she liked.
“We’ll be there. In fact, I’ve got an idea. How about we try and get the whole old gang together?”
“That’s a great idea bud! I’ll call everybody and get it all set up. You guys just be there and hungry by six.”
“Okay.”
Caleb watched his friend run off in the direction of some of the youth that had come to church that day. Soon Caleb turned his attention back to Sarah.
“Well today has definitely been full of surprises. For me at least.”
“Me too. The first one was that you actually came to church with me. Which was a shocker.”
He walked her towards the door of the SUV and let her in before walking around to get his own door.
“You and me both. I wanted nothing more than to hightail it in the other direction. My mother thanks you by the way. Of course that was after she complained that she’d tried to get me to go back for years and I kept saying no but that all you had to do was bat your eyelashes and I agreed.”
“It wasn’t quite that easy.”
“No matter what, thanks for talking me into it though. I needed this.”
“We all need it sometimes Caleb. I mean it doesn’t replace knowing God individually, but church has a big place in most people’s faith. I’m really glad you came.”