by Julie Allan
“Here, child, I brought you a blanket,” Aunt Dorothy said.
Lizzie jumped, “Oh, I didn't hear you coming!”
“I didn't mean to startle you. I was rinsing some things out at the kitchen sink when I saw you cross the yard. As I expected, you are terribly under-dressed for this brisk wind. Something you want to talk over? I have some coffee ice cream on hand.”
“Thanks for the offer, but I just polished off some butter pecan with Dot, our first mother-daughter ice cream powwow.”
“I am so glad to hear it. That was a winning strategy for me with you, that and getting you involved in cooking with me.”
“Yes, it was somehow easier to talk things over with you when shelling butter beans or decorating a cake. I will have to remember to get Dot in the kitchen more—we used to bake all the time when she was younger,” Lizzie said, smiling at the memory. “Tell me, Aunt Dorothy, did you ever find it hard to keep everything going when you were raising me and taking care of your mother and father?”
“I suppose. I don't recall thinking that much about it. I just did what I had to do. I didn't worry if I was doing it well or right. Child, you have got to learn not to judge yourself so much. Those of us who love you, we certainly don't judge you. It seems to me, if you just do from your heart, you will make the right decisions,” gently laying her hand on Lizzie’s head. “Have faith that your love is what we need from you, not a picture-perfect life.”
“How do you always know what I need to hear?” Lizzie asked. She stood up and embraced Aunt Dorothy.
Whispering in Lizzie's ear, Aunt Dorothy replied, “I speak from my heart, child, always from my heart.”
Chapter 3
The fall sunlight was blinding on the harbor. The water shone like shards of glass and reflected off the kitchen window as she and Dot squared off inside Aunt Dorothy’s house. Dot’s words felt like these same shards were stabbing her heart. “You are so mean!” Dot screamed, slamming the screen door behind her and making a beeline to the dock behind Aunt Dorothy's house—the same dock where Lizzie herself had sought refuge from her troubles for most of her life. At least she knew her daughter found solace in the same places she did.
“I just don't understand her these days. One minute, things are normal, and the next I am an ogre in her eyes,” sighed Lizzie. “Am I really mean for not letting her go downtown to King Street without adult supervision? She is only twelve,” she said, turning to Aunt Dorothy for her take on the situation.
“Well, child, Dot is what they call a tween these days. At least that’s what the ladies on the altar guild tell me. As I recall, you were not easy at that age,” Aunt Dorothy replied. Her hand shook as she raised her sweet tea up to her lips, taking a long slip, and eyeing her niece over the rim. Lizzie gazed right back, relieved that her aunt’s eyes were as bright and alert as ever, but concerned by the shaking hands that revealed her frailty.
Shifting her concern over Aunt Dorothy’s evident aging to Dot’s latest outburst, Lizzie found it hard to believe her daughter, Dorothy Patricia—named after Aunt Dorothy and Bennett’s mom—was about to turn thirteen. Where did the time go? Soon her daughter would be entering adulthood, and she and Bennett would celebrate another anniversary. Had they stayed together all those years ago, they could be celebrating their silver anniversary instead of their fifteenth. At least they had eventually found their way back together, and she knew with certainty they would celebrate their twenty-fifth and even their fiftieth anniversary. She could not imagine a life without him.
The sunshine, dappled by the live oaks, danced across the floor of the porch as Lizzie and Aunt Dorothy sat in companionable silence. Lizzie turned her thoughts once again to Aunt Dorothy, who was trying to come to terms with the fact that, at the age of ninety-four, was having to give up some of her independence. Lizzie knew Aunt Dorothy was frustrated that her body did not want to cooperate. At least her mind was still as sharp as a tack. Aunt Dorothy had even been taking an online class. She was glad Bennett had been so easily swayed to move in to take care of her beloved aunt. Her worry that Aunt Dorothy would be bothered by the chaos of a busy family so far seemed unfounded.
Lizzie turned her thoughts to the turmoil with Dot and her endless to-do list that came from being the mother of two and owner of her own business. Her worries ran like a slideshow on a repeat cycle. She looked up and gave Aunt Dorothy a smile. “Penny for your thoughts?” Lizzie asked.
“I would think at my age, my thoughts would be at least worth a dime,” Aunt Dorothy laughed. Then, a shadow of concern passed over her face, and she took a deep breath. “I am a bit worried about you.”
“Whatever for?” Lizzie asked.
“For one thing, you have dark circles under your eyes, so I assume you’re not sleeping very well. I hope moving in here has not been too much on you. I hope you and Bennett are comfortable in the guest room while your bathroom renovations are getting done” she answered.
“No, I love that we are living here! I admit cleaning two houses while we are waiting for ours to sell, is a bit tiring, but that is temporary. I assure you, my lack of sleep has nothing to do with you,” Lizzie insisted. It was a bit dishonest, as she was concerned about Aunt Dorothy. But now that they were under one roof, and Aunt Dorothy no longer had to climb the stairs on a daily basis or tackle too many chores, she seemed happier. Overall, Lizzie was optimistic about the state of Aunt Dorothy’s health.
Lizzie sat back as and took a long sip of her tea. After a few moments of quiet contemplation, she elaborated, “I think I’m not sleeping because I have so many balls in the air, my brain just can’t seem to shut off.” She paused for another sip. “Also, Dot’s unpredictable mood swings keep me on edge. I can’t help but worry about what kind of mistakes she will make. Plus, Bennett’s coughing has been waking me up.”
Aunt Dorothy stood and began picking away the dying leaves on the geraniums. “Perhaps Bennett ought to go and see Dr. Chalmers.”
“Yes, I have that on my to-do list, if I can get him to give me an opening in his calendar.”
“As for Dot, as hard as it is, you have to let her make some of her own mistakes. That is how she will learn and grow. At some point, a parent needs to step back and trust the foundation they provided.”
“You and Bennett, do you share notes? The two of you always have wise things to say. It is a bit like living with the Dali Lama,” Lizzie laughed. Then she stood and began tending to the fern. “I really don’t think I could survive very long without you two.” It was no wonder that besides her children, Aunt Dorothy and Bennett were the heart and soul of her being. They were anchors that kept her upright when the seas of life got rough. They were the light in the darkness that always brought her home. Her days with Aunt Dorothy were limited and the pain of imagining a day without her seared Lizzie’s heart. She was comforted by the thought that at least her years with Bennett would be plentiful.
Aunt Dorothy, still tending the flowers, seemed to sense Lizzie’s thoughts. “Well, child, I think it will be a while before you have to find out. I have more than just days left. More likely months, and if I am lucky a year or two,” Aunt Dorothy replied, a mischievous twinkle in her eye.
“Oh, I didn't mean . . . I want you to have years and years . . .” Lizzie stumbled over her words.
“Aha, got a reaction from you!” Aunt Dorothy teased. “I knew what you meant, child. Now, what are you going to do about Dot?”
“I suppose I better go down to the dock and see how to repair this latest rift, and if it is okay with Bennett, we could consider letting her go downtown.”
“Just remember, she is a lot like you, child. Put yourself in her shoes and really listen to her. I think you will find she has a good head on her shoulders,” Aunt Dorothy said as she patted Lizzie's arm, her eyes misting with tears.
“I am so blessed to have you.” Lizzie embraced Aunt Dorothy, enveloping her frail body like she would a child.
“I am the one who is blessed,”
she whispered.
Down at the dock, Dot was dangling her feet in the water. Lizzie slipped off her flip flops, sat down beside her and put her own feet into the refreshing water. She could feel the hostility as Dot stiffened next to her. Lizzie said a silent prayer to stay calm and in the breeziest voice she could muster, began her offensive. “Let's try this conversation again.”
“How do you mean?” asked Dot.
“I mean, start again. Tell me what you want to do, who with, and why,” Lizzie said, playfully kicking some water towards her daughter. The tension in Dot’s body relaxed as Lizzie’s offer of a do-over sunk in.
“Well, Chelsea's mom said she would drop her, Jenny, and me at the corner of King and Calhoun next Saturday at ten so we could shop the farmer's market and then walk down King Street. She would meet us at that place on King Street that has the patio at eleven-thirty and treat us to brunch,” Dot rushed to get as many details before her mother’s protests could begin. She paused for a breath, and Lizzie smiled to encourage her to continue. “She also has a tracker on Chelsea's phone so she can see where we are at all times. You could get me a phone and track me, too.”
Lizzie looked out across the water, instead of at Dot.
“Mama, are you okay?” she asked.
“Yes, baby, I'm fine. I was listening. It's just . . . Well, have I ever told you that this is the exact spot I came to at your age when I needed to think things through or get over something? There is something so soothing and magical about this view.” The two sat side by side for a moment, mesmerized by the view.
Lizzie let out a deep sigh. “Well, you are nearly thirteen, and I like the idea that even though you would be on your own, Chelsea's mom will be keeping close tabs on the three of you. So, I guess I can admit I was a bit hasty to tell you no. As long as your daddy agrees, we will give you permission to go.”
Dot squealed with delight, startling an egret who was fishing on the edge of the marsh grass. “Really? Do I get a phone too? You know, so that you can track me?” she said, snuggling up to Lizzie and resting her head on her shoulder.
There it was, the instant transformation from a sulky tween to a sweet little girl. She is giving me whiplash! Lizzie leaned her head towards Dot, savoring the moment. She filed it away to remind herself how lovable Dot could be.
“That is something else I want to talk to Daddy about. If we do decide to get you one, know it will be very limited in what it can do, and if you violate the trust with it, it will be confiscated,” she said, playfully splashing Dot.
“Yes, ma'am!” Dot answered with a splash of her own. The mother and daughter lay back on the dock, laughing.
Soon they were engaged in a game they had played since Dot was about four years old. They took turns telling stories about the shapes they saw up in the clouds.If only I could freeze time. The sun began to sink lower in the sky, splashing brilliant colors of yellow, orange, red, and purple. The breeze off the water grew brisk and reluctantly Lizzie sat up.
“Okay, buttercup, we should go check on Aunt Dorothy and start supper. I would love your help in the kitchen.”
“Sure,” Dot said, happy now that she was going to get her way.
“Your daddy and Sawyer will be back from fishing in a bit. I will talk to him then.”
They walked back up to the porch arm and arm. “Now that is what I call a pretty picture!” Aunt Dorothy exclaimed as the two came up the steps.
Lizzie and Dot struck a pose and giggled. “What would you like for supper?” Lizzie asked.
“I think I have a hankering for breakfast for supper” Aunt Dorothy answered.
“Oh, that will make Sawyer very happy! I am on it,” Lizzie said.
“What if I fixed you my famous fruit smoothie for an appetizer?” Dot asked. Dot was no stranger to the kitchen. Her mother and Aunt Dorothy were skilled cooks who had included her in meal preparations for as long as she could remember. Her smoothie was yogurt with frozen blueberries and honey—famous only in her family.
“I would love that!’ said Aunt Dorothy.
“Yes, ma'am, coming right up,” Dot said, skipping ahead to the kitchen.
“So, things been righted?” Aunt Dorothy asked after Dot had disappeared into the house.
“Yes, I listened to her. I found that what she was asking wasn't so unreasonable after all. Thanks for your sage advice,” Lizzie answered.
“Oh, it's not so much sage, as it is experience. Thank you, Lizzie . . . for taking such good care of me.”
“It is my pleasure. You have taken care of me for as long as I can remember. Besides, that is what family does.” She kissed Aunt Dorothy on the top of her head and headed off to get started in the kitchen. Lizzie was grateful to put a homemade, albeit simple meal on the table. It had been weeks since she had made anything from scratch.
After supper and settling Dot and Sawyer into a movie, Lizzie and Bennett took their two dogs, Maddie and Monroe, out for a walk. The sun went down early these days, and the chill of fall was definitely in the air. Lizzie and Bennett held hands as they strolled down the street. Lizzie thanked her lucky stars every day that she had Bennett. She marveled at it; she did not feel worthy of him. He was always doing things for her. He was always thoughtful and kind. Do I do enough for him?
As they walked along, she thought about their wedding. They had married in a quiet ceremony on New Year’s Eve, surrounded by family and friends. In the almost fifteen years since they had continued managing successful businesses, had two children and had loved, and lost two beautiful golden retrievers, Lucky and Ella. Now they had Maddie and Monroe.
“You are awfully quiet tonight,” Bennett said. “Oh, just contemplating the wonderful life we have,” Lizzie answered, squeezing Bennett's hand.
“Yes, we have a wonderful life. So why do I sense a bump in the road coming?” Bennett asked, his cough breaking up his words. “You know me too well. There is something I need to discuss with you. It isn’t a bump, more of a blip.” “Lay it on me,” Bennett paused to let Monroe sniff at the pole on the corner.
“Dot has asked permission to go downtown with friends Saturday morning, semi-supervised,” Lizzie began. “What do you mean, semi-supervised?” Bennett asked, and Lizzie filled him in on the argument and the subsequent conversation with Dot on the dock. “That seems reasonable to me.”
“What do you think about getting her a phone? I did talk with M.A. and Amy, and they both said they gave their kids a parent-controlled phone at twelve.”
“Well, if your best friend and my sister . . .” Bennett laughed and Lizzie soft-punched him in the arm. “Yes, I agree we should get her a phone. At the very least, it will enable us to track her. I had been considering a microchip in her neck . . . Ow!” Bennett said as Lizzie's second punch was a bit more forceful.
“Well, Dot will be happy. She is two-for-two. There is one more thing . . .” Lizzie said. “What other great problem can I solve for you?” Bennett asked.
“It’s actually your problem. It’s your cough. I think you should see Dr. Chalmers and see if he can give you some sort of prescription allergy medicine.”
“I suppose I could do that and it would definitely help you sleep better.” “So you noticed?” she asked.
“Well, I keep waking myself up, I figure you must be waking up too,” Bennett answered.
“So can I schedule that appointment?” persisted Lizzie.
“Yes, but can you wait until after I finish the renovations on our master bath? We should be able to move out of the guest room and into our suite in a week. I would just like to get one more thing off the to-do list.”
They turned back towards the house. “Did I tell you I have the guys coming on Saturday to help with the last of the heavy items that need to be moved?” Bennett asked.
“Have I told you lately that you are the best husband a girl could have?” Lizzie asked, leaning into his arm.
Bennett laughed. “You are saying that because I let you pick out the fancy showe
rheads,” he said, planting a kiss on her forehead. “I suppose you want me to tell you that you are the best wife and best friend a guy could have.”
“You know it,” Lizzie lifted her head towards his so she could make out with her husband like they were still teenagers.
Chapter 4
Lizzie stood back and examined herself in the mirror. She was pleased with her success in disguising her dark circles with makeup, even if the fine lines gathering around her eyes seemed to jump out at her. She sighed and concentrated on her clothes. Lizzie loved the beginning of a new season. Pulling from a different section of her wardrobe is fun. She had chosen a long-sleeved deep plum dress with a subtle pattern of concentric circles. She layered it with a cream-colored vest and her favorite silver necklaces. She completed her fresh-for-autumn look with her favorite red cowboy boots.
She grabbed her purse and headed out to meet Amy and M.A. for a much-needed girl’s night. Bennett had taken Aunt Dorothy and the kids out for supper and had promised to supervise homework and bedtime. Again, Lizzie was reminded how blessed she was in the husband department. I really need to schedule a date night soon and show him.
She walked into the sleek jewel box of a wine bar that Amy had chosen. Lizzie’s eyes adjusted to the dim light. The walls were lined with black wine racks stocked like a library would stock books. She scanned the corner with the leather club chairs and then around to the long bar. Finally locating the girls in the opposite corner from the door. “So this is what goes on while I'm checking homework and corralling kids into bed,” Lizzie said as she joined Amy and M.A., who were already perched on high stools at a tall metal table.