by Pamela Bauer
“That’s right. I have to do what’s best for me,” he declared confidently.
“And what makes you so sure leaving school is the right thing?” Dylan asked. “Getting an education is important.”
“You’re a fine one to talk,” Jason said. “When you were my age, you weren’t in college.”
“No, I was in the Marines. I put in my time, Jason. Instead of four years at college I spent six years busting my butt following orders and taking every class offered to me. My education came from the military,” Dylan told him.
“And I’m going to get my education from living my life the way I want to,” Jason boasted. “College is not for me and I’m not going to continue doing something that’s a waste of time.”
“Getting an education is never a waste of time,” Dylan contradicted him.
“It is for me and I’m not doing it, so get off my case.” He grabbed the bagel and his glass of milk. “Thanks for breakfast, Maddie. I’ll be in my room where I won’t get hassled.”
“If you’re going to take food into that room, make sure you clean up after yourself,” Dylan called out to his retrieving figure.
“Jeez! You’re not my old man, so why don’t you quit acting like him,” he grumbled as he stormed out of the kitchen.
Dylan said to Maddie, “Thanks for keeping the chili warm. I’ll be right back.”
She watched him leave and wondered just what he was going to say to the youngest Donovan. She decided not to wait to find out. She left a note on the table, telling him all he had to do was pour the chili into a bowl and eat it. Then she hurried upstairs, away from the Donovan boys.
DYLAN WASN’T SURPRISED to find Maddie gone from the kitchen when he returned. He wished she hadn’t witnessed his argument with his brother. Even though she treated Jason like a brother and was more than likely aware of his problems at school, he hadn’t wanted her to hear their discussion of family matters. He especially didn’t appreciate that Jason had brought his past into the conversation.
Even if he did suspect that Maddie already knew more about him than the average tenant usually knows about her landlady’s son. She’d lived with his mother for the past year and a half and had become like one of the family. It was rather unsettling—wondering just how much she had been told about him.
He decided to find out. He had just finished the chili she’d left for him when he saw her pass through the hallway carrying a basket of laundry.
“Maddie, could I talk to you for a minute?”
“What is it?” She stood with the basket propped against her hip, staring at him with an impatience that warned him she didn’t have time for any fun and games.
He would have liked to have proved to her that she’d enjoy playing with him, but he didn’t. He simply said, “Do you think you could sit down for a minute?”
She hesitated, then with a sigh put the basket on the floor and took a chair across from him at the table. She’d tied her hair back with a scarf and wore no makeup, but to Dylan she couldn’t have looked more attractive.
“I’m sorry you were stuck in the middle of what happened between me and Jason earlier,” he apologized.
She shrugged. “It’s all right. I understand. I have two younger sisters. One’s the same age as Jason and at times she sounds an awful lot like him. Whenever she doesn’t like what I have to say she uses that ‘You’re not my mother’ line on me.”
“Where is she now?”
“At the University of North Dakota studying to be a nurse.”
“It sounds as if she at least has some direction in her life.” He washed the last of the chili down with Coke.
“It’s hard for any nineteen-year-old to know what career to choose. I struggled with the same issues that Jason’s facing.”
“Did you really quit college?”
She nodded. “Middle of my junior year. I was short on money and I had an opportunity to do something I love to do so I took it.”
“Any regrets?”
She shook her head. “No. As I already told you, being in the traveling dance company was much harder than I expected, but it was a good experience. Maybe Jason will be able to say the same thing a few years from now.”
“You could be right, but I know my mom’s not going to be happy. She told me he was having problems adjusting to college, but I don’t think she expected him to quit without discussing it with her.”
“It hasn’t been easy for him since your dad died,” she said, her voice full of compassion. “Losing a parent is like losing a compass. It takes a while to learn how to figure out in what direction you should be going.”
Dylan wanted to tell her that as a compass his father had been off center, but he knew he couldn’t make such a comment without taking their conversation in a direction he didn’t want it to go. “Kids change a lot during their adolescence—physically and emotionally.”
“He’s still trying to figure out who he is and what’s ahead for him,” Maddie said in his brother’s defense.
“I’ve been there and done that,” he said on a sigh. “It’s hard for me to fault him for wanting to set out on a different path than what he’s expected to do. I did the same thing when I was his age.”
“Is it true you turned down a scholarship to join the Marines?”
Dylan figured Garret had done more than warn Maddie to be careful around him. “So you do know about that.”
She gave him an apologetic smile. “Our mothers were the best of friends, remember?”
So it wasn’t Garret who’d told her. “You knew way back then?” When she nodded, he added, “Then you must also know I never got along with my father.”
“Things were okay the summer I was here. What happened?”
He was tempted to tell her exactly what had been the turning point in his relationship with his dad, but he knew he couldn’t, for it would mean sharing a secret that could come back to hurt his mother. Instead he gave the answer he’d been giving his family for the past thirteen years.
“My father had rules and expectations…probably because I was the oldest. I didn’t want to have to march to anyone’s beat but my own.”
“You don’t strike me as the rebel type.”
“At eighteen I was, so I left.”
“That must have been hard on your mom.”
“It was. Over the years she did her best to get us to reconcile, but it just never seemed to work out. My dad and I couldn’t talk to each other without there being antagonism.” He shook his head at the memory. “I guess we just weren’t meant to get along.”
He was surprised when she said, “I can understand that. I don’t get along with my father, either. I seldom see him.”
“Why?”
“Mainly because he and my mother divorced when I was fifteen.”
“That couldn’t have been very long after you were here.”
She shook her head. “It was the reason I stayed with your family. All three of us girls were sent away for the summer. My two sisters went to stay with my aunt in Wisconsin. She didn’t have room for me, so my mom asked yours if I could stay here while I attended the dance camp.”
“Did you know your parents were having marital problems?”
“No fourteen-year-old wants to believe her parents have fallen out of love.” She got up to get herself a can of Coke from the refrigerator. “I’d hoped they were just going through a rough spell, as my mom always called it, but after I got back the inevitable happened. My dad moved out of the house.” She popped the top on the can as she sat back down at the table. “I thought you knew.”
He shook his head. “Mom never mentioned it. She was too busy trying to make peace between me and my dad.”
She smiled weakly. “And she’s very loyal to her friends. She’s so considerate when it comes to other people’s feelings, and it was a very humiliating time for my mom. At first she didn’t want anyone to know that she’d been dumped for a younger woman, but when he remarried a few years later, ther
e wasn’t much point in denying it.”
“So your stepmother is closer to your age than his?”
She took a sip of the soda. “Yes, but she’s not the woman responsible for breaking up our family. He had several women before finding the one he wanted to bear his future children.” There was bitterness in her voice.
Dylan felt a rush of empathy for her. Her father had been an adulterer, just like his, breaking vows that should have been sacred. Again he was tempted to tell her the secret he’d kept for thirteen years, but thoughts of his mother stopped him.
“Do you have any contact with him at all?” he asked.
She nodded. “He calls every now and then, but my sisters and I know that it’s more convenient for him to pretend we don’t exist. We remind him of how old he is and he wants to think he’s young like his second wife.”
“I’m sorry.”
She shrugged. “I’ve accepted that my relationship with him will never be what I’d once hoped. I can’t change how he feels about me.”
Anger for the man who’d always been just a face in a picture in his mother’s photograph album rose inside Dylan. He understood all too well the bitterness Maddie felt toward her father. He’d had those same feelings.
“I don’t know why some men have to be so stupid,” he remarked, thinking of his own dad.
“Fathers aren’t like friends. You don’t get to pick the one you want,” she stated with a sadness in her eye that made Dylan want to put his arm around her in comfort. Then she said, “That’s why you’re lucky, Dylan. You had parents who honored their commitment to each other. You didn’t have to deal with the issues divorce forces a family to face.”
No, but he’d had to deal with the frustration and anger he’d had for his father and keep a secret that could cause his whole family to suffer. He wanted to tell Maddie that she wasn’t the only one who’d suffered because of a father’s infidelity, yet if he did, he would put her in a difficult position.
“No one has the perfect family, Maddie,” he said soberly.
“Maybe not, but yours looks pretty good from where I sit,” she said, lifting her Coke can in salute.
“I can see why Mom thinks of you as a part of it,” he said sincerely.
She looked totally taken aback by his comment. “What a nice thing to say. Thank you.”
He reached across and took her hand in his. “I can be nice, Maddie. I wish you’d let me show you just how nice I can be.”
“Dylan? You here?”
Maddie snatched her hand out of his at the sound of Shane’s voice. Dylan wasn’t sure she was quick enough as his brother came into the kitchen, an oblong glass baking dish covered with aluminum foil in his hands.
“I brought you something,” he said, eyeing the two of them suspiciously. He set the dish on the table in front of his brother. “Jennifer sent dinner over. All you have to do is stick it in the oven. The directions are on the top.” He gestured to a three-by-five note card that was taped to the aluminum foil. “She said this way Krystal and Maddie wouldn’t have to worry about fixing something for you. They might want to spend the evening with their guys if the roads improve.”
“Tell her I appreciate her thoughtfulness,” Dylan said, although relieving Maddie of her cooking duties was not a favor he needed. Nor did he like to think of her spending the evening with Jeffrey.
“That was sweet of her, although I doubt if Krystal will be going out even if the roads do improve. She’s got the flu,” Maddie said, leaning closer to Dylan to read what was on the note card.
“How bad are the roads?” Dylan asked, hoping that Maddie wouldn’t be able to go anywhere else for dinner.
“They’re a mess,” Shane answered. “It wasn’t too difficult for me because I borrowed my father-in-law’s four-wheel-drive pickup. It has a plow, too, which is the other reason I stopped over. I’m going to do Mom’s driveway.”
“I did the walk once yesterday, but it’ll need to be done again,” Dylan told him.
When Shane stared at him in disbelief, Maddie said, “He insisted on shoveling. I tried to tell him, but…” She ended with a shrug.
“No need for that today. I’ll take care of it,” Shane announced.
“If you need any help, you can get Jason out of bed,” Dylan said.
“How come he’s home?” Shane wanted to know.
Maddie must have seen the introduction of Jason’s name as her cue to leave. She got up, taking the baking dish with her. “I’m going to put this in the refrigerator and then get back to my chores. Tell Jennifer thanks for me, will you, Shane?” She hurried from the room, pausing only to pick up her laundry basket.
Dylan hated to see her go. What he didn’t want was to discuss Jason with his brother, yet he knew he didn’t really have a choice.
“So now what did Jason do?” Shane asked when they were alone. “That is the reason why Maddie rushed out of here, isn’t it? She knows he’s in some kind of trouble?”
Dylan grabbed two beers from the refrigerator and handed one to Shane. “Sit down and I’ll tell you what he told me.”
When he’d finished, Shane said, “He’s not going to California. He’s going to stay in school.” He slammed his bottle down on the table, then jumped to his feet. “Where is he now?”
“In his room.”
Without another word, Shane walked out of the kitchen. Dylan listened for voices raised in anger. There were none.
A short while later, Shane returned. Alone.
“Any broken body parts?” Dylan quipped.
Shane sunk down onto a chair and said in amazement, “I don’t think he listened to a word I said.”
“I thought I was the only one Jason figured was clueless,” Dylan said with a crooked grin.
“He thinks he knows more than both of us put together.” Shane took a long drink of the beer he’d left on the table. “It sure would be a lot easier if Dad were here.”
Dylan knew there was no point in bringing their father into the conversation, so he simply said, “But he’s not.”
“So what do we do?”
“I’m not sure there is anything we can do,” Dylan said calmly. “He’s nineteen. Legally he’s an adult.”
“That doesn’t mean we should let him make a big mistake,” Shane protested.
“We don’t know it’s a mistake.”
That drew another look of disbelief from his brother. “You’re kidding me. You’re on his side?”
“No, but I’m trying to see both sides of the issue. Believe me, I don’t want to see him quit school, but I’m not sure that’s our decision to make,” he reasoned.
“If he quits now, he’ll never go back.”
He shrugged. “It’s a possibility.” He didn’t want to argue with Shane, especially not over Jason.
Shane shook his head. “I don’t know what’s happened to that kid. He’s got more pierced body parts than I have shoes, and he looks as if he dropped a bottle of bleach on the top of his head.”
“Could be worse. It could be purple,” Dylan said with a grin.
“It was purple. Last summer. You weren’t here.”
Dylan wished he had been around more for his youngest brother. “I think the way he looks, the way he’s behaving…it’s all part of being nineteen and trying to figure out where to go next.”
“That may be, but college is important. I think Garret should talk to him.” Shane suggested. “He’s closer to him in age.”
“He’s just warned me not to come down too hard on Jason. Do you really think he’s going to want to play the heavy?”
“You can ask him. He’s going to stop by when he finishes at the hospital.”
“I hope he doesn’t think he needs to come by and check up on me.”
“I’d say it’s more likely he’s using you as an excuse to see a certain redhead,” his brother said with a wiggle of his eyebrows.
“He’s interested in Krystal?”
“You didn’t know?” Shane roll
ed his eyes. “Oh, please tell me you didn’t treat her as if she was fair game.”
“No, I didn’t,” he denied emphatically. “She’s Mom’s tenant. What do you think I do? Hit on every woman who happens to be in the same room as I am.”
“Then you have changed, haven’t you.”
Dylan held up his fist as if he might punch him, then allowed a smile to spread across his face. “She is good-looking, isn’t she?”
“Very.”
“Then what’s keeping our little brother from making his move?”
“You’ll have to ask him that question.” He finished the rest of his beer and then stood. “I better go plow the drive.”
“Thanks for stopping by, Shane, and tell Jennifer I appreciate the food,” he said sincerely.
“No problem.” He started toward the door but stopped. “About Maddie…” he began.
“What about her?”
He looked as if he wasn’t sure he should say what was on his mind. Finally he said, “I just thought you should know Mom thinks of her as a daughter.”
“I know. You already told me that. So did Garret. And Mom.”
He shrugged. “Then you know.”
“I know,” Dylan repeated. That didn’t stop him from thinking of her as something else, too. But he wasn’t about to tell Shane that. His feelings were for Maddie’s ears only. And he would tell her. Soon.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Dear Leonie: I’ve always prided myself on making smart decisions when it came to men. I thought I could handle an innocent flirtation with this guy I know, but then he kissed me and nothing’s been the same since. I like him but I don’t want him to want me. Or do I? Why won’t my brain tell me what to do?
Signed: Knocked for a loop by a kiss
Leonie says: Flirting is never innocent and it sounds as if you’re not listening to your brain.
MADDIE WAS STANDING on a chair trying to hang the curtain back on the window above her bed when she heard a knock on her door. Expecting it to be Krystal, she automatically called out, “It’s open.”