by Rhett Heath
“Yes.”
“Okay, listen. This may be completely stupid, but I overheard Celeste talking to a couple of guys she was sitting by in history the other day, and she was defending Bryce.
“They,” I continued, “were ragging on him for being gay, and she was totally calling them assholes. So, if she’s not homophobic, maybe I could confide in her and start fake-dating her, and maybe you could start fake-dating Allie if she’s not homophobic either, and the four of us could hang out.”
He said nothing.
“Oh, I don’t know,” I said, exasperated. “It’s a crazy idea. I’m pulling my hair out thinking of any way that would let us spend more time together; this is how desperate or whatever I am.”
“Thank you,” he said, as he played with my chest hair, and the water. “Just knowing that you really do love me and that you really do want to spend time with me makes me happier than I could ever imagine.”
“I do,” I said, elated.
We made out until the timer dinged, then we moved over to the training table, where we continued kissing and went further. Because we were pretty safe from anybody catching us, because the whole gym was locking everybody out, he stripped naked and we sixty-nined. He got on top of me again and it was incredible.
Jate’s body was lean and tight, his glutes like granite covered by his skin. I couldn’t get enough of his body. He came first; then I came because I was turned on that I sucked him to completion. We both swallowed, and then he spun around, and, still lying atop me, we kissed for the rest of the ten minutes.
He helped me back into the whirlpool, set the timer, and then we just sat there together. We didn’t even talk for a minute or so; it was nice.
“I feel safe, or secure, or something,” I finally said.
“Same here. It’s so cool to be able to know that I have somebody in my life that I can trust, and love, and not always be on guard, wondering if somebody will find out, or say something, or do something.”
“You know what, though?” I went on, kind of wondering why he didn’t like my idea or whatever, “there’s something else that I’m frustrated about, but I don’t want you to think I’m stupid?”
“I promise you, Bobby, I will never think that,” he said.
I hesitated. “I don’t know how to say it, so I’ll just say it. I want to be able to hang out with you whenever. At school, or dragging Main, I don’t want to ignore you, or not talk to you, or pretend we don’t even know each other, or that we’re not even friends.”
“If,” he said hesitantly, “we really did start fake-dating Celeste and Allie, that’d be the reason that we could become friends. If everybody saw the four of us together, then it would naturally follow that we became friends, and then everybody would think that that’s why we started hanging out together. It’s a great idea! I like both of them, so that’s not a problem. The scary thing is, what if they out us, or what if somebody else finds out, or, wait, how would we even go about approaching them?”
I blushed. He liked my idea.
“Celeste was already defending Bryce, remember? So, approaching them is the thing we have to figure out.”
“Oh yeah,” he said, then went on. “We need to think it through like this: do we plan it all out first or do we tell them first and then formulate a plan with them. It’d be great to get their help. Girls are so much smarter than us.”
“You’re so smart!” I said, turning back, kissing him, “plus you’re so hot that Allie would be crazy not to pretend-date you.”
“Me? Whatever! Do you need me to tell you again that you’re the most attractive guy in the school?”
“Maybe,” I said, coyly, “or just show me.”
“That I can do.”
I turned again to kiss him, and he reached in and stroked me as we kissed. After just a minute or so, I had to stop him, as I was going to come. We kept kissing until the whirlpool timer rang, then, though I could have just gotten dressed and we could have left, we moved to the training table and went at it some more.
Chapter Seven
Jate
“SO, HOW do we go about getting this to work?” Bobby asked, as we were getting on our clothes.
“You know what? Let’s just ask them! Let’s get them in your truck with us—you can ask them if they want to go riding around, and one of us comes out with it!”
“Okay, what if we do this….” He looked at the clock on the wall, thinking. “They’re probably at cheer practice still, so—”
“Yeah, they finish around four thirty, so we have twenty minutes to wait, but I have an idea how we can actually lead the conversation toward us being gay, but, I’m rude and interrupted you. What if we do what?”
“You’re awesome! You didn’t interrupt me. I love how you talk. You’re so, like, happy and excited by anything. And then you’re polite and cute too.”
“I’m sure I’m blushing.” I drew him in for a hug. “So, what’s the plan?” I asked as we embraced. “We’ll have to be back at practice at six o’clock. Will that be enough time, do you think?”
“Well, let’s figure it out together. How could I… uh, we could walk over to the parking lot. Your bike is over there by my truck, right?”
I nodded.
“We could walk over there together. The cheerleaders will all see us. You could pretend your bike tire is flat as I’m leaving, and could chase me down for help.”
“I wouldn’t have done that before we… before I handed you your towel,” I said, as we both grinned.
“I’ll notice that your tire is flat. I’ll pretend to be helping and grab your bike and put it in my truck bed, and then you can get in with me, and we can drive off. Then we can come back, but what would be the reason for us to come back? Fuck!”
I laughed. “We could covertly flatten a tire on their car?”
“Where did you learn so many big words?” he asked, sincerely.
“I read a lot, remember.”
“Oh, yah. When you start tutoring me, I’ll learn all the big words, too, because you’ll be helping me! I’m so excited!” he said, making fists with both hands and shaking them.
“Okay, so, wait. We still have to—”
And then I cut him off. “Brilliant idea! This is maybe too elaborate, but, do you have any loose nails or screws in your truck?” I asked.
“Probably, why?”
“I could purposely stick one under one of your tires, so when you back up, your tire would go flat, and—”
“We could take it to their dad’s shop to ask him to fix it!”
“But why would I be helping you?” I asked. “And how would going to his shop help? Okay, here we go,” I began, again. “My bike tire gets a flat, you stop and offer to help. Cheer practice will almost be over, anyway, and all the cheerleaders love you, so you call over Celeste and you ask if she knows how much her dad charges to fix bike tires or if he even does. Then we keep her talking and eventually Allie will come over—ready to go home with Celeste, and you ask them if they’ll go to their dad’s shop with us—because anyone who gets asked by you to spend time with you will never refuse because you’re Bobby Versailles and they won’t say no, guaran-damn-teed!
“Then, because their dad loves you because you’re the star of the team, and because you ask if you can take the girls and me to the Dairy Freeze, he’ll say ‘yes’ because they’ll never let him refuse that. And I can even say ‘no,’ then Allie will probably persuade me to come, so I will concede, we can go from there. And I’m daring enough, because of how much I love you and how protected and safe I feel because you love me, that I will, while we’re just talking about whatever, bring up the subject of Bryce.
“And I’ll get their opinions, then come out to them somehow, and they’ll be sympathetic, or whatever, and say that it’s cool, and that they feel bad for me or whatever, and say that it doesn’t matter to them, and they’ll want to be supportive of my ‘plight,’ then you can come out, too, and then the conversation can go f
rom there….”
“Could it work?” Bobby asked. “I guess it could,” he replied, answering his own question, “because I’m feeling giddy, and whenever I feel like this, good things happen. I felt this way after I first read that first note you put in my locker. What have we got to lose? Just our lives, like Romeo and Juliet. And we’re not idiots. I love you so fucking much!” he exclaimed, kissing me.
“Okay, so in case I don’t dare tell them or for whatever reason, to abort the mission if either of us feels like something’s the matter, how will we tell each other?”
“Right. Yeah. Let’s use a code word.”
“Like what?”
“Uh, how about ‘Trevor’?” he asked. “He’s their cousin and a manager with you. That’d be an easy word to use, that they wouldn’t expect.”
“Good. That’ll work,” I said, before stopping to ask if we were really going to go through with it.
“I dare if you dare,” he replied.
“What if we abort, then we want to unabort?” I asked.
“I think we’re overthinking this. We have ten more minutes.”
I leaned in and kissed him, and held on tight. It was nice. It was comforting. I felt safe.
BOBBY HAD put my bike in the back of his truck, and we’d already talked to Celeste about going to her dad’s shop with us when Allie came over to the truck. She was with another cheerleader, Laura. Bobby and I looked at each other like a wrench had been thrown our way. The three of them were always hanging out together, and we both snuck another glance at each other—we just hadn’t factored Laura into the plan.
We had their dad pump up the tire; he did it for free because it only needed air. Oddly, he couldn’t find a puncture or hole of any kind in the tire. Hmm.
Like we had planned, I said I should just head home when Bobby invited us to the Dairy Freeze; Allie, like I thought she would, begged me to come too. All three of the girls came with us.
After ordering at the counter, we found a booth; small talk ensued. Sitting side by side, Bobby and I were proverbially sweating bullets, the girls were all facing us across the table. I could tell he wanted so badly to have this plan of ours work.
Nobody else was in the dining area. I could feel Bobby’s nerves; he wanted so badly to trust these girls. I sensed that he was never going to say “Trevor,” and I really didn’t know if he could say the words “I’m gay,” so I just went for it. I was able to muster up the courage because of him.
As I returned from the counter, having gotten up to get our two trays of fries and shakes, I set down the trays and slid in next to him. My boyfriend, Bobby Versailles, was sitting there, looking so darn vulnerable and hopeful, I couldn’t keep it in that we were a couple. We all began eating.
“Celeste,” I said, moments later, “I heard that you shut down some guys talking trash about Bryce Williamson. That’s pretty awesome.”
“Well, they made me mad!” she said, tears welling in her eyes.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.” I stuck a spoonful of my shake in my mouth, the shake too thick to drink.
“It’s okay,” she continued, “thanks. He and Laura and I were friends since before kindergarten. When Bryce hit puberty, he was brave enough to come out to me. I still hate this town and people in it for making him feel so lowly about himself. Especially the ones who relentlessly teased him.”
“Well, I know it’s been two years, but I’m sorry for your loss, and just wanted to tell you thanks. I’m gay, too, and even though I’m in the closet, I appreciate what you did.”
They weren’t shocked, like I thought they’d be, though they all looked stunned. Bobby quickly turned his head toward me, not expecting that I’d just blurt it out like I did. The girls all just sort of stared, and then in unison three pairs of eyes looked at Bobby, thinking he may blow a gasket and bust my face into the next booth over or something. He turned and stared back at them.
Before anything else happened, and maybe to stop anything violent from happening, Laura quickly and quietly said, “I’m gay too. I’m a lesbian.”
Then Allie quickly added, “I am too, and we’re dating.”
Our jaws dropped.
They all laughed. Laura explained.
“After Bryce died, I was sick about it. We’d known him forever and figured he was gay, but we’d never said anything. I’d get depressed sometimes, but I’d never thought about suicide. I loved life.
“I wasn’t going to chance getting depressed one day and doing something stupid. I found the courage to come out to Celeste. I had never come out to Bryce and”—tears filled her eyes—“still wished I would have, because maybe I could have helped him somehow. Maybe he wouldn’t have done it.”
Laura couldn’t talk, so Celeste took over. “When Allie hit puberty and realized she liked girls, she confided in me.”
“Celeste became matchmaker of the year,” Allie continued, “and Laura and I have been dating for nearly eighteen months!”
“That is so awesome!” I said.
“You haven’t said a word this whole time, Bobby. What do you think of all this? What do you think of J.T.’s revelation?” Laura asked him. “Why haven’t you freaked out that this kid sitting next to you and the two of us are all three homos?”
“Because he and I are boyfriends,” he said, calmly taking my hand and lifting our entwined fingers, setting them on the top of the table.
He and I both started laughing as all three of their jaws dropped.
We explained a G-rated version of how we got together, and after hearing of and talking about our story, it was Allie who finally came up with the genius plan for the five of us.
Celeste Goodwin (cheer captain) and Bobby Versailles (football captain) would start “dating,” as would Allie and I, a few days later.
The three of them already had their arrangement in place. They had really learned a lot about our small town, how to get around, people in it who were adults who were gay, and that type of thing.
Everybody in the school always saw the three of them together, so that wouldn’t be an issue. Bobby would tell kids he didn’t mind sharing Celeste with Laura, saying that he knew they were best friends, a package deal. Laura was convinced that the school and community would believe whatever we sold them.
“It’s Bobby Versailles and Celeste Goodwin for crying out loud!” she said, grinning with satisfaction. Everyone knew how close the Goodwin sisters were and how close Celeste and Laura were as friends. It seemed a perfect arrangement!
We figured this all out with fifteen minutes to spare.
At one point during the planning, I looked over and saw Bobby’s eyes welling with tears. Our hands were clasped under the table, and I squeezed his hand. Celeste saw him tearing up, too.
“Oh my God,” she said, tenderly, “it’s okay, Bobby. It’s all going to be okay, now. These two have been together for almost a year and a half and nobody has even suspected!”
He wiped away the tears that rolled down his cheek.
“I’ve never been happier in my whole fucking life,” he said, catching his breath. “You’re doing all of this because you understand our predicament and are willing to help, even if it’s going to inconvenience you. Why are you being so helpful? Why are you willing to help?”
“Are you shitting me?” Laura asked. “Lots of reasons. One, is that we totally get what you’ve been going through. Two,” she said, looking at Allie, then back to us, “there is strength in numbers.”
“Three,” Celeste added, “I get to pretend-date Bobby Versailles!”
The girls and I laughed as he blushed.
“My respect for you for being so brave just increased tenfold, Bobby. Bryce once mentioned that you were one of the only guys who didn’t tease him or pick on him. Thank you for that. That’s the fourth reason why I want to do this!”
Tears came to my eyes. Bobby lowered his head. “Thank you, guys, so much,” he said, his voice cracking.
“Ah, swee
tie, it’ll be okay.” Celeste slipped around from their side to ours and wrapped an arm around him, squeezing.
“You’re awesome, Bobby.”
I gripped his hand harder as he broke down in sobs.
“Five,” Allie added cheerfully, wanting to lighten the moment, “I get to pretend-date Jacob Thomas! I mean, I’m lesbian, but if I weren’t I would totally want to date you; even I realize you’re hot—I’ve heard lots of girls talk about you.”
It made Bobby smile.
He nudged me. “Do you believe me now?” Then, looking across at the girls, he told them that I only believe I’m average looking.
“Shut up!” Celeste blurted out, smacking the back of my head. “If you were older? Oh baby!”
I blushed.
“Ow! Okay, stop.”
“Bobby, I’ve just got to say,” Allie said, deflecting the attention off of me, “you do know how mind-blowing it is that you’re gay, right?”
“He knows. I’ve told him a lot,” I said, answering for him. “I think it’s mind-blowing that he’s attracted to me, but according to you guys, I’m hot enough for him, I guess.”
“Hottest couple ever!” Celeste cooed.
“We’re not chopped liver,” Laura interjected, as we all laughed at her feigned indignation.
“All three of you are beautiful. Thank you so much for doing this. I’m overwhelmed. You’ve, like, got your shit together and seem so on top of this, I’m stunned.
“You’ll learn that I’m sometimes a worrywart,” he added. “How is this all going to work? You’ve got to all probably get home, and we’ve got to get back to practice. Not that I’ll be doing much, but Jate’s got to get back. But where do we go from here?”
I could tell that Laura’s brain was going a mile a minute. “Since you’re not practicing, couldn’t you sit in the bleachers and watch practice? J.T. would still have to do manager stuff, but the three of us could come and sit with you and pretend we’re watching practice.”
“The whole team would see you talking to me,” Celeste chimed in.