by Haley Weir
“I never want to see this guy again, do you hear me, Mikayla? I’m serious. You’re
coming back to fix this mess. You and your drama, I swear, Mikayla,” Roger shouts.
“Yeah, sure, whatever Dad. Got it,” Mikayla answers, unphased. There’s nothing her family could say about Ethan anymore. It’s up to her now to win back her man. But he needs to sober up first.
Chapter 33
Ethan’s eyes open. Mikayla’s sitting next to him on the couch,and she’s been waiting for him to get rest so that they could talk.
“Where am I?” he says, looking around.
“You’re in my apartment,” says Mikayla. “In the city.”
“How’d I get here?”
“Well, after the whole ordeal at my dad’s house, I got you in an Uber and took you here.”
“I don’t remember the car ride here at all.”
“Yeah, you’ve been dead asleep. You basically sleepwalked up the stairs. It was pretty impressive, honestly,” she remarks.
“Alcohol really wipes me out,” says Ethan.
“I can see that,” says Mikayla. She passes him a glass of water.
“My head hurts,” he says, taking small sips.
“You think?”
“Yeah.”
“Listen,” Mikayla says. She’s nervous. She’s never nervous, even when it comes to important auditions. But she’s about to lay it all out for Ethan. She doesn’t know the last time, if ever, she was prepared to be this vulnerable with a man about her feelings. She usually ends things before important conversations need to happen.
“I’m sorry,” she begins with. “I’m so sorry I hurt you. I’m sorry I told you it was because of my family,” she continues. “It has nothing to do with them. It’s all me. It’s always been me and my feelings. No, my family didn’t love you, but they also didn’t get to know you. I guess I used them as a scapegoat instead of dealing with my own feelings. But I don’t want to do that anymore. You’re the only person I feel like I can be completely myself around.”
“Mikayla,” Ethan tries to say. But she’s on a roll, and won’t let him get a word in.
“I’m not used to serious relationships. I’ve only ever casually dated, and I thought this would be another fling. Without even talking to you I assumed that’s what you wanted. Instead of asking you, I distanced myself more and more. I….I was scared. Hell, I’m still scared. But I’m not hiding my emotions anymore. I want you to know everything that I feel. My life has been completely empty without you. I never knew how much I could miss someone.”
“Mikayla,” says Ethan. This time, he grabs both of her hands. The hair on her arms stands up straight, and her body lights up from his touch. “I’ve missed you so much. I needed to give you your space, but I’ve wanted to talk to you so badly. I’ve been drinking to distract myself. I was always good at being on my own, and then I met you. I knew I would never, ever be okay with being alone again.”
“Do you mean that?”
“More than anything, Mikayla. But, I have to ask- do you really feel like I’m clingy, or obsessive, or...too much to handle? As much as I want you in my life, I don’t want you here because you feel like you’re my caretaker. I want you because you make me laugh, and your snarky comments make my day. I love your ambition, and your confidence. You’re an incredible person, and I never wanted to stifle you. I know I’m a lot to….bear.”
Mikayla laughs. She loves how, despite the situation, he can make her laugh. She stifles a giggle to address the question.
“No. I don’t now, at least. Maybe I did. I was worried that I would lose my independence. I have only ever worried about myself. I didn’t understand the dynamics of a relationship; it’s a two-way street, and as much as you might depend on me, I depend on you, too. It’s codependence. It’s sharing the responsibility, and taking care of each other because we want to and not because we have to.”
“I’m really glad to hear you say that. I never ever want to be a burden to you. I want to be able to depend on you and for you to know you can depend on me. I would never let anything happen to you. I love you, Mikayla,” says Ethan.
“I love you, too,” says Mikayla, and she’s never more certain of anything before. She feels no self-doubt, no cold feet. She says it with confidence as heart fills to the brim. She feels like she’s floating. She leans in, her face just inches from Ethan’s. She crawls towards him and sits on his lap. Grabbing his face in her hands, she presses her lips against his. They kiss hard, its a special kiss shared between two people in love…a kiss that makes knees weak. This kiss expresses one thousand “I love yous” and says, “I never want to be away from you.” It was the type of kiss that Mikayla had only ever dreamed of.
Chapter 34
Mikayla rolls over to see Ethan sleeping next to her. He spent the night untied and free. It was a risk they both agreed to take, together. They decided that if things went wrong, Mikayla was ready to support him and do what it takes to calm him down. The alarm clock on her dresser lets her know it’s 4:00 A.M. It’s too early to wake Ethan up, and its peaceful watching him sleep. The rise and fall of his chest calms her like watching the ocean, with its tide rolling in. She doesn’t know what their future holds, except that they’ll be with each other through whatever it is. There are still a few things on Mikayla’s mind, but they can all wait until morning. Then, Ethan turns over onto his side. His face is close to hers. His eyes gently flutter open, and a smile creeps across his face.
“This is the only thing I ever want to open my eyes to,” he says. They’re holding each other now, and she basks in his familiar smell. He puts his head on her chest while she strokes back his brown hair, letting it softly and slowly fall through her fingers.
“Me, too,” she says. “Can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“What ever happened to Tony?”
“Oh, yeah,” says Ethan. “He’s probably fine, but honestly, I don’t know. I didn’t kill him if that’s what you’re thinking…not saying I wouldn’t have. But I just didn’t.”
“So, what happened?”
“Well, I took him to the woods and basically just scared the shit out of him. I roughed him up a little. Gave him a few scratches, a bite. Then I just left him and started running. I ran as far as I could, knowing I could get back to the cabin if I followed the mountains. I figured Tony would wake up and have to fend for himself. I thought someone would find him, a hunter maybe. Or another, less understanding bear,” he says with a grimace. Mikayla genuinely can’t tell if his bear comment is serious.
“So, he might come back?”
“Come back where? Not to you. I think he got the idea to leave you alone.”
“No, no to me. To my mom,” says Mikayla.
“Your mom? What about her? I didn’t think you wanted anything to do with her.”
“It’s funny how these things work out sometimes, isn’t it? My mom came by to talk to me, to tell me Tony’s missing. I was so nervous. I had no answers, and I thought there was a chance they knew about you. I didn’t know where you were and I was just...worried.”
“I promise you that I will always be okay. You never have to worry about me.”
“You can tell me that twice a day and I always will. Its only because I care so much about you, and the thought of losing you…” Mikayla can’t even finish the thought as she feels a lump form in her throat.
“You’re not losing me. I’m not going anywhere. Tell me the rest of what happened with your mom,” he says. He looks up at her with his giant green and dancing yellow-speckled eyes. She feels safe and warm.
“Okay, so, she actually was pretty….relieved. Apparently things with Tony weren’t great. I’m not sure that they were never great. I totally didn’t see it coming.”
“Yeah, I mean, when was the last time you talked to your mom? About anything real, you know?”
“Forever, basically,” Mikayla said. “There was such a distance between us.
I wanted to blame her and I wanted to blame Tony, but I also stopped trying. We all stopped trying. All of us kids.”
“And now?”
“Now we’re going to work on things. Talking with her was great. She really helped lift a fog. I saw things more clearly after we spoke. I never thought we’d get here.”
“I’m proud of you.”
“Really, I couldn’t have done it without you. You know, handling Tony and all that.”
“And all that,” he laughs. Sleepiness weighs down Mikayla’s eyelids.
“I love you, Ethan,” she says. “I love saying it. I love ‘love’. I love, love, love, you,” she says in a very sleepy voice.
“I love, love, love, you, too,” he says. “Let’s get some sleep. We have a big day coming up.”
“Today? We do?”
“We do. Trust me, it’s all good. There are just some things I want to show you.”
Mikayla falls asleep with a smile on her face for the first time in weeks.
Chapter 35
The city is far behind them now as they take one of Ethan’s cars from the city back to the cabin where it all began.
“What are we doing back here?” Mikayla asks, taking in the mountain view. It’s late August. The air is hot and muggy, and feels like summer has stretching on for years. They arrive at the cabin, and Mikayla excitedly opens the car door and lets herself out. She loves being able to do little physical things on her own, things that weren’t so easy when her ankle was in a cast.
“There’s just some things I didn’t get a chance to show you. You’ve shared so much of yourself, and I want to give you a proper introduction to my world. There’s a lot you still don’t know, and a lot that you’ll learn.”
“Should I be nervous?” Mikayla teases as he takes her hand. They walk around the house straight to the back. The green grass is as vibrant and welcoming as ever.
“A little,” he says, and winks.
“Where are we going?”
“You’ll see,” he says. They’re approaching the edge of the woods.
“Do you trust me?” he says.
“More than anything,” she replies. With that, Ethan takes off. He keeps running until she can’t see him anymore. She’s curious, but not nervous. She trusts this man with her life, a life she plans to live out with him and only him. Out of the distance, a large brown mass of fur appears and starts walking towards her. She recognizes the eyes immediately. The bear approaches her, then rubs up against her like a purring housecat. Mikayla laughs and strokes the fur.
“Get on,” he says.
“Get on?”
“Trust me.” With that, Mikayla climbs on the back of the gigantic grizzly. When he’s on all fours, she’s a considerable distance from the ground. She grips tightly and he begins to run. They’re flying through the woods now, moving past trees so quickly they’re nothing but a blur to Mikayla. She loves the adrenaline and letting herself trust the giant creature. She can’t believe she ever felt like this relationship was suffocating her, when it is truly the most freeing experience she’s ever had. No audition or life experience could give her the rush she gets from Ethan. But not just Ethan as a bear…Ethan as a man. Ethan as a person. The sweet, kind, funny, sympathetic man who had her heart all along, who patiently waited for her while she figured it out.
Finally, the bear slows down.
“I could go on like that forever,” she says. “That’s the closest I’ve ever been to taking flight.”
“Come with me,” he says. Now, they’re walking side by side through a dense area of trees. When there’s a clearing, Mikayla sees a structure ahead. It was a cabin similar to Blake’s, but looked more like an office building. She’s confused.
“What is this doing here?”
“You’ll see,” he says. He approaches the building and knocks on the door. A few seconds later, it opens.
“Ethan! You made it. You must be Mikayla,” says the stranger kindly. He’s handsome, just like Ethan.
“I’m here, brother,” says Ethan. “Give me a minute,” he says. With that, he darts away. When he comes back a few moments later, he’s human…and completely naked. Mikayla blushes, seemingly the only one caught off guard by his nudity.
“You look great. Come in, get dressed,” says the stranger.
When Mikayla enters, she sees Blake and Avery.
“Mikayla!” Avery practically shrieks. “Its so good to see you! I wasn’t sure if you were going to make it.”
“I’ve made it. But...where am I?” she says with wide eyes, seaching the room for clues. The cabin is decorated beautifully with a rustic design, book shelves that reach the ceiling, and a wooden dining room table.
“You’re at the headquarters, Mikayla,” says the stranger. “I’m Douglas. I’m Ethan and Blake’s brother. And yes, I’m exactly like them,” he adds with a laugh.
“The headquarters? Of what?”
“It’s rather unofficial, but it’s the headquarters for our family and other shifters in the area. This is kind of home base. Its isolated with plenty of rooms to stay in an emergency, extra clothes, and books all about shifting for curious guests like yourself. For us, its a place to call home. Many shifters don’t have a home or someone to help take care of them, so this is what we made. A makeshift home for any shifter out in the woods on their own.”
“Wow. This is incredible,” says Mikayla as she marvels at the cabin that seems much bigger on the inside than it does on the outside.
“Isn’t it?” says Ethan.
“These are everywhere, all over the country. This one is just ours. All of the buildings are different, but they serve the same purpose. They are homes for those who feel lost,” says Ethan. It occurs to Mikayla that she doesn’t know a lot about Ethan’s past. Was he one of the lost shifters seeking refuge?
“Wow,” Mikayla repeats, dumbfounded.
“I wanted to show you this since I met you. I almost took you here, but this place is extremely private,” says Ethan.
“Ethan, I have so much to talk to you about,” she says.
“We have the rest of our lives for that,” he says with a smile. Mikayla’s heart nearly jumps out of her chest. Just hearing him say the words confirmed that she has nothing but time to learn, grow, and meet all the people in Ethan’s life.
“Shall we eat, then?” says Douglas.
“Eat, we shall!” says Blake.
“I’ve been wanting to bring you to dinner for so long,” says Ethan. “I want you to be part of my family.”
Mikayla’s glowing. She’s beaming in a way that would’ve embarrassed her in normal circumstances, but these aren’t normal circumstances. Nothing about her life with Ethan will be “normal circumstances”, but maybe that’s just what she needed…to stray from the norm.
Chapter 36
Mikayla and Ethan are in the living room of Blake’s cabin now. They’re full of food and drink from the family dinner.
“So,” Ethan says.
“So,” says Mikayla. She hasn’t stopped smiling all day. In fact, she hasn’t stopped smiling since Ethan came back in her life.
“I don’t want you to think I’ve made up my mind, because I haven’t. Whatever you want is what I want. I understand this is a lot to ask,” Ethan begins. He’s not one to nervously ramble, so Mikayla isn’t sure what bomb he’s preparing to drop.
“What is it?”
“I want to stay here. At Blue Ridge. I want to be close to the headquarters, especially as the summer ends. We get a huge wave of new shifters during the autumn season. I want to stay here, but I could never ask you to leave the city for me. Unless, of course, that’s what you want. I just want to be with you. I’ll live with you in the city if that’s what it takes. You don’t have to answer now, but I just wanted you to consider it,” Ethan says, and Mikayla interrupts him.
“You know, I have my whole life in Manhattan. Theater…friends…and all that,” she says.
Ethan looks defeated. “I know
.”
“Wait, let me finish. I have my whole life in Manhattan, but not if you’re not there. You’re my whole life now.”
Ethan’s beaming now. “Does this mean you’ll stay?”
“This means we’re going to work it out. How do you feel about splitting your time between the city and here? I know that’s a lot to ask of you, too, but we have cars at our disposal. Since we don’t have to pay rent here, I can keep my apartment -,” Mikayla says, only for Ethan to interrupt her this time.
“Yes. It’s perfect. That’s perfect. You’re perfect,” he says. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too. But no, I’m not perfect. I’m learning how to truly give and take. No relationship ever flourished without compromise,” she says.
“When did you get so wise?” he teases.
“It’s been a big summer for me. I’m growing… changing…shifting my perspective.”
“Hey, I’m the one who does all the shifting here. Am I right?” he says. Mikayla laughs.
“Wait, wait. Important. Can we sleep together without like, all the ropes? Like we did last night?”
“Absolutely. I’m never calmer than when I’m in your arms. When I’m with you, I feel in control. I’m more powerful than my inner demons.”
“You are. But I love you in every form. It’s never been about what you look like, although as a human you are the damn sexiest. Its about what’s on the inside. Your patience, your compassion, your humor, how gentle you are. All of those things define you, not the fact that you’re a shifter.”
“I’m so thankful to have you in my life. You’re brilliant, you know that? And strong. Resilient, even. Brilliant and resilient. I can’t imagine my life without you.” They’re both smiling, staring into each others eyes.
“And I can’t imagine my life without you,” Mikayla replies.
Brilliant and resilient, she thinks to herself. You sure are.
THE END