by KB Winters
I understood him now—and now that I did—I hoped I could help him get through these interviews so he could get back to his normal life.
Which didn’t include me.
Why I felt so sad about it, I had no idea, except that I felt something with Ethan I hadn’t felt with another man, ever. That was on me, not him and I owed it to him to give him every chance to get back to the life he wanted. So, I suppressed it. I shoved it down so deep that it was like it hadn’t happened, that we didn’t have this strange connection we shouldn’t. My business was all I had so as I looked out into the Pacific Ocean, I threw it all out there and turned at the sound of my name. “Good morning, Ethan. How are you today?”
His broad shoulders shrugged and he looked around sheepishly. “Okay I suppose. Feeling a little restless.”
“Are you up for today? You can go home and get some rest and we can start fresh tomorrow.” If he didn’t want to be here today then he couldn’t be helped and selfishly, it would give me another day to get myself under control.
“Nah, I’m good. What did you have in mind?”
“The theater.” I’d spent the weekend reliving the time we spent in Australia with his family, what I knew about his relationship with Katarina and watching the Samantha Stevens interview at least two dozen times. What he needed now, were tools to get through these interviews without losing his shit.
“Are we watching a movie?”
I shook my head, staring just over his shoulder to avoid those searing blue eyes.
“A play?”
“No. This is an improv class. To help you think and keep your cool on the fly.” I braced myself for his reaction and based on his crossed arms and angry glare I knew he didn’t like the plan.
“You think it’s a good idea to be in a class full of people with camera phones looking to make a quick buck?” He shook his hand and raked his fingers through his hair. “What are you thinking, Misha? You’re supposed to be a damn professional!”
I swallowed the quick retort on my tongue and crossed my arms in what I recognized as the protective gesture it was. “If that’s what you think, maybe you should take today to think about if you trust me enough to see you through this.” I felt unbelievably hurt by his careless words, his angry accusations even though I knew I shouldn’t. Sleeping with him had been a mistake. Things were already changing.
He stared at me, waiting for something I couldn’t discern and upset that he wasn’t getting it. “So, you’re giving up?”
“No Ethan,” I sighed, suddenly feeling exhausted. “I’m asking you to trust me.”
“Fine,” he growled and turned away, looking over his shoulder to see if I’d follow him.
“Follow me,” I told him and brushed past him, heading to my car for the hopefully short drive to the theater. We both stayed silent on the drive and anger radiated off Ethan the entire time which only impressed me that he still planned to go through with the class. It was a testament to his desire to get back to working himself into the ground. And I was determined to help him get that. Because it was what he wanted.
“This is it?” He looked like I’d taken him to the scene of a homicide.
I nodded, reaching for patience that was just out of my reach. “Yes.” I put a hand to his chest just outside the auditorium and immediately regretted it at the hard heat pulsing off him. “Look, just keep an open mind Ethan. I wouldn’t do anything to embarrass you or hurt your chances at getting beyond this.” I wanted him to trust me but the wariness swimming in those blue eyes stabbed at me until I rubbed the pain in my chest away and stepped back.
“Fine.”
I pulled the door open and fixed a professional smile on my face as I spotted the teacher. “Misha, darling! I wasn’t sure if you two would make it.” Jeff Bainbridge’s silver eyes sparkled with delight, as they always did. Those eyes were the reason he’d spent fifteen years on the big screen, making women all over the world fall in love with him as a gangster, a general, a future king and even a superhero. He was the man of America.
“Jeff, love agrees with you. At least if that glow is anything to go by.” I let him hug me tight before turning to a shocked Ethan. “Jeff this is Ethan, your student for the day. Ethan, Jeff will be your teacher.”
“Jeff Bainbridge,” he said as awe filled his voice, he shook his hand. “I am a huge fan. It’s great to meet you.” He looked around with a frown. “Where are the other students?”
Jeff raised his eyebrows in question and clapped. “I was made to understand that you required privacy?”
“Right.” I felt his gaze on me but I couldn’t look at him. Not now, knowing what he truly thought of me. “Where do we start?”
I took a seat in the back row where the lights were too dim to be seen and watched Jeff and Ethan go through a few warmup exercises. They seemed to get on well, laughing and backslapping as men do when they’re comfortable together. By the time the three-hour session was over, Ethan seemed relaxed and I just hoped he’d remember the tools he learned and used them for the interview which was no less than a week away.
“Don’t be a stranger,” Jeff called out as we left the auditorium and stepped out into the blinding afternoon sun.
“I’m sorry Misha.”
“Don’t worry about it,” I told him as I climbed behind the wheel. I didn’t want his apology. You either trust someone or you don’t and since he didn’t, all I could do was help as much as I could. “Did you drive or am I dropping you off at home?”
“Home, please. Maybe you want to come in?”
I didn’t know if I wanted to laugh or cry at the half-hearted invitation, though I did feel better knowing he was just as conflicted. But clearly the all-night sex in Tokyo was a bad idea. He’d needed distance from me and from the situation, and it was up to me to give it to him. “I don’t think that’s a good idea Ethan. I’ll come over tomorrow at ten, does that work?”
“Yeah,” he sighed, disappointment coming off him in waves. “See you tomorrow, Misha.”
I ignored the dejected set of his shoulders as I pulled onto the PCH and made my way home.
Sometimes doing the right thing really fucking sucked.
Thirteen
Ethan
There was less than a week until my interview on The Women and I didn’t feel ready at all. Jeff Bainbridge—I was still getting used to the fact that Misha knew the award-winning actor—had given me a few coping skills when I felt like my anxiety was getting the better of me. I’d already used them twice this morning and I still felt fucking out of it and a lot of that had to do with Misha. I’d hurt her feelings by not trusting her. After everything we’d been through, I’d tossed that trust back in her face.
And I had no idea how to make it up to her. To make everything worse, I couldn’t stop thinking about that night we had in Tokyo. It was the hottest, most passionate and exciting sex I’d ever had. And it didn’t look like I’d be getting a repeat anytime soon. I wanted another night, maybe another week and though I apparently couldn’t get through an interview to save my company, I did know women.
And I was determined.
Which is why I invited her to come earlier so we could do the one thing guaranteed to calm her and make a smile appear on her pretty face, something that had been missing the last couple days. I heard the sound of her car door slamming and went to greet her. “Good morning.”
“Morning,” she said warily, staring with raw naked hunger at my bare chest. Heat roared through me but I had to tamp it down. “Why aren’t you dressed?”
“Come on in. I thought we could get out in the water. It’ll be easier, to talk I mean.” A lump formed in my throat when she marched right back out the door and to her car. I was frozen and I couldn’t go to her to stop her. Luckily, I didn’t have to because she retraced her steps.
“I need to get changed,” she said and slid in around me, careful to make sure we didn’t touch. I reached a hand out and let one finger trace down her arm until she was ou
t of reach.
By the time we were out on the water, Misha’s smile came a little easier but it had dimmed considerably from our first few meetings. The silence that settled between us felt comfortable as we paddled out, my gaze stuck on the curve of her hip as she pulled ahead of me. The day was unusually warm so she wore a plain white one-piece instead of her wetsuit and, fuck me, she looked good enough to eat. “Wait up!”
“Come on, slow poke!” She laughed over her shoulder, flashing a bright beautiful smile that hit me right in the gut. She finally reached a spot that seemed appropriate and turned to me, looking over her shoulder at the incoming waves every once in a while.
“Sorry the waves are crap.”
She laughed and threw her head back, highlighting her neck and that luscious mouth. “I’m pretty sure even you can’t control the waves, Ethan.”
That right there. She had a fiery attitude and a smart mouth that made my dick hard for her. Unlike most women, she wasn’t impressed by my wealth or success. The only thing that seemed to get any reaction out of her was me. That flash of heat at the door told me she wasn’t immune to me, so I didn’t get why we couldn’t have sex again.
“Have you figured it out yet, Ethan?”
“What?” Had I missed out on a chunk of the conversation?
“Why that question got to you so much on that particular day?” Her big green eyes held no judgment. The serene expression on her face was so beautiful, so ethereal. Like a little healing fairy.
“No.” I thought about that day a lot over the past few months and nothing about it stood out. “It wasn’t the anniversary of her death or a special date in our relationship. Hell, I don’t even know why it was her that triggered me.”
“Before that day on the infamous white chair, how would you have answered that question?”
“Can’t you just look it up? The internet is a wonderful thing,” I snapped but one look at Misha and she was completely impervious to the barb.
“I could, but I want you to think about it and tell me what you normally say to that question?”
She wanted to hear it? Fine. I sat up taller on the surfboard and sent a hard glare her way. “Good health is important to me and being in the fashion industry taught me the importance of achieving peak fitness goals in a healthy way.”
Misha didn’t look impressed. “Is it true that a woman was your inspiration?”
“No. I was inspired by my desire to live healthier.”
“Lie!” She shook her head, wearing a sympathetic smile. “It’s part of the truth, but nowhere near the truth. Are you that worried that people will know the identity of this woman?”
“Yes. No. It’s not like the world doesn’t know Katarina Shipova or what happened to her, but what they don’t know is that we were close. That we were in love. And that my love wasn’t enough for her to stop killing herself.” I hated to think of it like that because it made me sound like a selfish little prick.
“You know that isn’t the case, Ethan.”
“It fucking feels like it, Misha! She cared more about looking a certain way and getting a certain gig, than she did about us.”
She sighed and I looked over at her. “I don’t want to tell you what to do but I would like you to consider something.”
“I’m listening.”
“Maybe you feel guilty or angry, because you forgot about her. Except for the first time you told the story, it was a script. The first time it was out of deference to Katarina, but after that it was just an answer to a question. Slowly, over time, even you forgot. Until that day on the white chair.” She paddled closer and laid a hand on my thigh. “Maybe it was someone’s perfume, or a glimpse of hair the exact shade of hers, I don’t know. But something about that day made you remember…that you’d forgotten.”
Shit. Could it really be so simple? “What you’re saying is that I’m going to feel this way whenever someone asks what made me want to start Aegle?”
“Hell no! I’m saying you should consider talking about Katarina, about what she means to you. Talk honestly about why you are so dedicated to healthy living.” She grinned and squeezed my thigh as she pretended to suppress a shudder.
I smiled, thinking about Misha’s words as she paddled away, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I didn’t know if I could use Katarina’s memory that way. Wasn’t it mercenary to resurrect my reputation at her expense? I didn’t know, but she’d given me a lot to think about. Another time.
“Misha, wait up!”
***
“Stay for lunch. I’ll whip us up something delicious.” I didn’t want her to leave, not yet.
“And healthy?” She looked so unhappy at the thought of a healthy meal that I had to laugh.
“How about only slightly healthy?”
“Depends. Can I use your shower?”
The image of her naked body, wet and soapy, sprang to my mind. My cock hardened in my board shorts. “Can I join you?”
She grinned and her skin flushed pink, but the look in her eyes said she wouldn’t be agreeing today. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
I stepped closer, the heat in our bodies mingling together in an intoxicating swirl of want and desperate need. “I think it’s a great idea.” I twirled a lock of her hair around my finger and tugged gently, enjoying the way her body pressed into me. The hard peaks of her nipples against my chest, her smooth skin against the rough hairs on my legs, my abdomen. “A really great idea.” Another finger slid from her bottom lip, between her breasts and down the soft curve of her belly, coming to a rest at her hip.
“Ethan.” That breathy little moan sent a spear of fire to my cock and the gentle glide of her hands up and down my torso solidified my resolve.
I had to have her. But I was a fucking gentleman and I wouldn’t ambush her in the shower. No, I hurried through my shower in a guest room and wrapped a towel around my waist so I could wait for her. In my bed.
“Did you need to use this bathroom? I could have used a guest bathroom,” she shook her head, barely noticing the knot of her towel had started to slip.
“No, I need something else.” My breaths came out fast and shallow at the sight of her in that towel. My hand shot out around her waist and pulled her closer, my cock tented the towel at the sexy gasp she let out.
“What?”
“You,” I told her and snatched that knot free, looking my fill once the towel fell to the floor where it belonged. “I need you Misha. To touch you.” My hand grazed up the inside of her thigh, stopping just shy of the heat pulsing from between her legs. “I need to taste you.” Pulling a pretty pink nipple between my lips, sucking and licking until her body relaxed into me.
“Ethan,” she breathed out, so turned on, the pulse at her neck beat frantically as evidence of her arousal.
“Tell me you want this Misha.”
“I do.”
I wrapped her long hair around my fist and tugged, scraping my tongue up the length of her neck. “Say the words.”
“I want you.”
That was all I needed to hear to get on my feet and lay her out on my bed, taking in her curves, her smooth skin and wild hair. Her legs were spread just enough to let me see her, how wet she was for me. “You’re wet.”
“Must be that magic mouth.”
Must be. I grinned and laid on my stomach, letting my shoulders shove her thighs apart as I buried my face in her aching, swollen pussy. She nearly flew off the bed when my tongue circled her clit, her fingers dug into my scalp but I didn’t give a damn. “Fuck, you taste so good.”
“Ethan, yes.” Her hips moved as my tongue flicked over her clit, faster and faster while those erotic moans spilled from her lips. “More,” she begged and I slipped one finger into her hot wet goodness and sucked her clit as thoroughly as I did her nipple. “God, yes Ethan. Yes!”
I was so hungry for her. A raw hunger that tore at me and released something wild in me. Grabbing that lush round ass of hers, I held her to me and fed off
her, lapping up her juices until she shook and cried, coming all over my face with my name on her lips. I looked up at her with a satisfied smile, my mouth slick from her pussy and she smiled back.
“Come here Mr. Mahoney.” I crawled up the bed and settled between her legs, my cock growing harder as she moaned with every swipe of her tongue. “We taste good together.” I nearly lost my shit as she proceeded to lick every drop of her juices off my lips, my tongue, my chin. “But I need more.”
“Fuck yes,” I groaned and pressed my cock against her swollen pussy. As we kissed, her tongue flicked out and slicked across the seam of my mouth while pushing at my chest until I was on my back, her naked goddess body on top of me. Tits heavy, nipples hard and hovering just out of reach. “Tease,” I growled and palmed her back to pull her closer for another taste.
She broke free and kissed down my body, her warm tongue teasing my nipples as she went lower, worshipping the rippling bumps of my abs that seemed to make her go wild. She moaned when my cock slid between her tits, letting it stay there while she finished with my abs.
“Misha.” Her name came out as a harsh groan when she pressed her tits together around my cock, lips and tongue teasing the head as I began to thrust. “Fuck, that feels good.” She made no sounds aside from the occasional moan while my cock nearly died of pleasure, sliding between her glorious tits before sliding into her hot, wet mouth. It felt so fucking good, this sensation nearly unbearable and I felt my balls tighten but I didn’t want to come. Not like this. “Misha.”
She looked up with a sensual grin and slid down a bit more, palming my cock as she licked from the bottom of my balls to the slit at the head of my prick. “Your dick is so beautiful.”
“Come here,” I groaned and pulled her up my body, flipping our positions with my cock poised at her entrance. “Put me inside you Misha.”