In This Town

by Beth Andrews

  * * *

  ANTICIPATION BUILT until Tori was light-headed, her knees weak. Walker’s grip on her hair was tight but instead of finding it painful, she thought the bite of it exciting. Beneath her hands, his heart beat steadily. He was all solid muscle and warmth and she wanted to lean into him, wanted to soak up his heat and his strength and take, take, take.

  She always took.

  But she couldn’t feel guilty about it, not when he was lowering his head slowly toward her. Her fingers curled into the softness of his T-shirt, dug into his skin. Still he took his time and she wanted to scream with frustration. Wanted to yank his mouth to hers.

  Wanted to push him away because she had a feeling, an instinctive knowledge, that once he kissed her, she wouldn’t be the same.

  His other hand went to her lower back, dragged her toward him until she was pressed against the hard planes of his chest, his thighs. He kissed her, his mouth firm. This was no hesitant kiss, no soft brushing of his lips against hers. It was ravenous and heated and, if she wasn’t mistaken, angry.

  She’d never been kissed like this before, where she felt the hunger build inside her, a fire threatening to consume her. Where she wanted to let the flames take her.

  Sliding her hands up, she linked her fingers behind his neck and kissed him back.

  Walker groaned into her mouth, whirled them around until she was pressed between his hard body and the cold edge of the stainless steel counter. Without breaking the kiss, he set his hands on her hips and lifted her onto the counter, the ease with which he did so causing her stomach to tumble.

  She slid her fingers into his hair, held his head. He deepened the kiss, stroked his tongue into her mouth. He skimmed his hands up her side, settled them on her rib cage, his thumbs brushing the sides of her breasts.

  Tori wanted to keep kissing him. Wanted him to pull her onto the floor, the counter, a table, anywhere, and touch her, all of her. She wanted, more than her next breath, this hard, enigmatic man’s hands on her, to feel him moving inside her. She ached, her core heating, her panties growing damp.

  She wanted to beg.

  And she never begged. Men begged her. She couldn’t want a man that much, couldn’t give up that control.

  She broke the kiss, leaned back. Though she was breathing hard, her blood feeling thick and slow in her veins, she wouldn’t let him see. Couldn’t let him know how he affected her. If he knew, he’d use it against her.

  So she slowly slid her tongue over her lower lip, capturing the taste of him, and smiled. “Well,” she said, not needing to fake her husky tone, “seems you’re not so different from other men after all.”

  Walker’s eyes hardened and cooled, a muscle worked in his jaw and she wished she could take her words back. Wished she could be sweet and trusting and naive and gullible.

  Wished she could open her heart, just a little, just for a little while.

  “Bullshit,” he said, his voice low and gravelly and sexy. He shifted, sliding his hands over so that he brushed against the underside of her breasts. Her breath caught. He noticed. His eyes darkened, filled with pure male satisfaction. “But I’m guessing that’s why you want me. And,” he continued as he slowly, ever so slowly, took his hands away and stepped back, “why I scare the hell out of you.”

  He walked away before she could deny it with a smart-ass reply.

  Before she could admit he was right.

  * * *

  HE WAS FREEZING. Anthony hunched his shoulders as the wind picked up. He hadn’t brought a jacket, hadn’t planned on being outside in jeans and a T-shirt when he’d been driving around aimlessly. All he’d known was that he couldn’t go home…couldn’t go back to Boston when his mom and sister needed him here.

  But it was hard. Everyone in town had heard about his father’s affair with his brother’s wife. Anthony’s family was being talked about, his mother humiliated, his sister crushed.

  And him? He was pissed. So angry he couldn’t be in the same room as his father, couldn’t even look at him.

  A car drove by and Anthony ducked down out of the line of sight. Hanging out on the porch of the police chief’s house at 11:00 p.m. probably wasn’t the smartest move he’d ever made but that’s where he’d ended up. Had driven by it a dozen times before he’d found himself parking his Jeep two blocks down and walking back toward the house.

  He should go, he thought, his stomach seizing with panic. If the chief knew he was out here…well…Anthony wasn’t sure what Ross would do but one thing he knew for sure, Ross would tell Layne and then Anthony would never hear the end of it. He rose only to crouch back down when headlights flashed and a vehicle pulled into the driveway.

  Huddled into the shadows, Anthony watched as a kid with brown hair got out. A minivan, Anthony thought with a shake of his head. Poor bastard.

  The kid walked around the front of the vehicle and then he was walking back toward the side door with Jessica by his side. They were holding hands, Jessica’s pale hair flashing in the dark. At the last minute, they veered to the left. They were coming onto the porch.

  Shit.

  Anthony moved farther back, his breathing ragged, his heart racing. But they didn’t notice, only had eyes for each other. Jess said something softly that had the kid smiling, then they were at the door and she turned to him. Kissed him.

  Anthony looked away, his chest burning.

  “Good night,” Jess said, sounding breathless.

  “Night,” the kid said, his voice deeper than Anthony would’ve guessed for someone his age. “I’ll call you when I get home.”

  “Okay.”

  She stood in front of the door while the kid jogged down the steps. She watched him back up, waved at him as he drove past the house. When she turned to open the door, Anthony stepped forward. “Jess.”

  She squeaked and whirled around, her hand over her heart. Her eyes widened. “Anthony? God! What are you doing here?”

  “Sorry,” he said, feeling like an idiot, like some weirdo stalker. He shoved his hands into his front pockets. “Sorry,” he repeated. “I didn’t mean to scare you, I just…”

  He just what? Thought he’d wait for her to finish making out with some other guy?

  Jesus, he really was losing it. He felt edgy and out of control and he didn’t know what to do, how to handle it.

  “Sorry,” he said yet again. “I shouldn’t be here.” He backed up, almost fell down the steps, caught his balance before stepping down.

  “Wait. Don’t go.” She reached out for him only to pull back before she could touch him. “Are you okay?”

  To his everlasting horror, his eyes pricked with tears. He hadn’t cried in years, not since he was a kid. But he wasn’t a kid anymore; he was twenty-one, a man in every sense of the word. Instead of answering her question, he looked behind him, down the road where the kid had driven away.

  “You still with that guy?” he asked, then winced because, hey, she’d only been making out with him not two minutes ago. “That Tyler?”

  “Tanner,” she corrected, looking at him curiously. And yeah, he’d known the kid’s name. His cousin—shit, his half sister—Nora was dating his older brother. “Yes. How about you? Are you still with that brunette?”

  Mackenzie. “No.”

  He’d broken up with her the night his father had admitted the truth. He hadn’t wanted to tell anyone, hadn’t wanted to explain why he wasn’t coming back to school, not for a while anyway.

  Hadn’t liked her enough to want to make it work.

  Jess sat down on the step as if it was the most natural thing in the world for her ex-boyfriend to visit her out of the blue, late at night. She slid over and he hesitated, then finally dropped down beside her.

  He kept his distance, though, didn’t want to get too close, didn’t want to touch her.

  “How’s school?” he asked, unable to think of anything else to say, unable to say what was really on his mind.

  “Good. I…” She rubbed her palms up
and down her thighs. Up and down. “I’m taking some college prep courses. I’m going to be a nurse,” she blurted, then looked at him as if daring him to make a hurtful comment about it.

  “That’s great. Really.”

  “How about you?” Jess asked, and he could feel her watching him with her big blue eyes. “How are your classes?”

  He shrugged. “I’m taking a break,” he heard himself say, though he hadn’t really decided until that very moment to go through with the idea that had been whirling around in his head ever since he’d come home. “I’m going to take the rest of the semester off.”

  She tucked her hair behind her ear. “Really? What do your parents think of that?”

  “I don’t care,” he said, knowing he sounded like a bratty kid.

  “So, what are you going to do? While you’re off, I mean.”

  He had no idea. He couldn’t work at his dad’s law firm, couldn’t be around his father that much. “I’ll get a job. I’ll probably find something here in town.” Though he had no idea what. He could probably work at the café. Celeste would hire him.

  Anthony and Jess sat in silence for a few minutes and for the first time since he’d found out about his father’s affair, since he’d discovered Nora was his sister and not just his favorite cousin, he felt like he could breathe. The sky was clear, the air crisp and, yeah, still cold. But his thoughts weren’t racing, and he didn’t feel as if he had the weight of the world on his shoulders, didn’t feel suffocated with anger and bitterness.

  “I hurt my cousin’s feelings,” he said. “Nora. Except, I guess she’s not my cousin, but my sister. She and Griffin came to dinner—it was the first time she’d been to the house since…since the truth about Dad and Aunt Val…”

  Jess brushed her fingers over the back of his hand. “I know,” she said softly.

  He nodded, curled his fingers into his palms so he wouldn’t reach for her. “Mom and Dad were trying so hard to act like everything was normal except nothing’s normal. Dad’s sleeping in the guest room and Mom cries all the time and Erin walks around like a zombie. I just…I couldn’t take it. I walked out. Just got up and left, right in the middle of dinner.” He swallowed but bitterness still coated his throat. “Nora came after me but I couldn’t even look at her. I love her, have loved her my entire life but the only thing I could think about was how, if she hadn’t been born, my family wouldn’t be torn apart.”

  He looked at Jess, saw the sympathy in her eyes and was filled with shame. He didn’t deserve her sympathy.

  “I’m sorry,” she said. “I’m really sorry about what’s going on in your family. Layne’s upset about it, too. She tries to pretend that everything’s all right but I can tell it’s not.”

  “Did you ever forgive your mom?” he asked.

  Jess smiled sadly. “It’s hard to forgive someone who keeps making the same mistakes, the same decisions again and again. I realized a long time ago that my mom would always put the drugs ahead of me, that there was nothing more important to her than the next high. After a while, I just stopped waiting and hoping for her to change.”

  “What if she gets clean and stays clean this time and finds you and apologizes. What if she wants a second chance?”

  “I don’t know,” she said thoughtfully, a frown marring her pretty face. “I mean, I’d be thrilled if she finally got clean but I’m not sure I’d trust it, you know? Some people don’t deserve a second chance. Some people don’t deserve forgiveness.”

  Anthony realized with another flush of shame that he hadn’t thought Jess deserved forgiveness, either, not from him. She’d lied to him. But more than that, worse than that, she’d hurt him. He hadn’t been able to give her a second chance, couldn’t have even if he’d wanted to. But he could’ve given her his forgiveness.

  “I’m sure Nora understands what you’re going through,” Jess said, surprising him by laying her hand on his arm. Her fingers were warm against his chilled skin.

  He knew she was right. Nora had a big heart. She’d never hold a grudge, never be as cruel as he’d been.

  The door opened and Anthony stiffened, glanced back at Ross as he stood in the doorway, the light behind him casting the chief’s face in shadow.

  “Anthony,” Ross said, surprise in his tone and Anthony knew Ross was taking in the scene before him. His niece, his underage niece, sitting in the almost-dark with a twenty-one-year-old, her hand on his arm, their hips touching.

  Anthony jumped to his feet, shoved his hands into his pockets as Jess slowly got to her feet. The last time he and Jess had been caught alone, they’d been making out in his parents’ hot tub. That was when Anthony had learned the truth, that the girl he was falling for was only sixteen years old.

  “You shouldn’t be here,” Ross said, not unkindly, which sucked even worse than if he’d yelled at Anthony.

  Anthony looked at Jess, felt as if, for the second time in his life, he was losing something important, something he’d never be able to get back.

  “Yeah,” he finally said, wishing things were different, that he was younger or she older, that being with her didn’t feel so right even when he knew it was wrong. “I know.”

  He walked away.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  “DO YOU HAVE a minute?” Celeste asked Tori Sunday afternoon after the café had closed.

  Since weekends were especially busy at the café, Tori liked to pitch in with the cooking on either a Saturday or Sunday a few times a month. Not having the tips a busy weekend morning brought in ate into her wages but Celeste needed her.

  “Sure.” In truth, Tori wasn’t in any hurry to get home. Brandon was still at Greg’s and she knew when she went to pick him up, she’d have to face her ex-husband and Colleen…that they’d have to discuss the very real possibility of a custody hearing. And once she did have her son with her again, he’d likely be more sullen and angry than he’d been this past year.

  Yeah, she’d much rather avoid all that for as long as possible. And who would’ve ever thought that she’d dread seeing her own child? That she’d feel such anxiety, such stomach-turning nerves just from the idea of picking him up? From not knowing if he was going to be her sweet-natured little boy or the bratty kid he’d morphed into?

  “Let’s talk in my office,” Celeste said.

  “Okay, just let me grab a soda first. You want anything?”

  “No, thanks.”

  Tori went down the hall toward the drink station purposely not looking into the kitchen where she and Walker had shared that…moment.

  A heated, wonderful, completely unexpected moment.

  But that’s all it was, she assured herself as she dispensed ice into a cup and then filled it with diet soda. It was just a brief second in time, a once-in-a-lifetime encounter. She had no desire to get involved with a man, with any man, let alone one who was investigating her sister, who suspected half her family of murder and other wrongdoings.

  She stuck a straw in the glass, took a long sip as she made her way back toward Celeste’s office. When she had asked Greg for the divorce, she had decided not to rely on a man to take care of her, not ever again. She needed to take care of herself and her son on her own. Needed to stop believing a man would make her dreams come true, that he’d somehow make her problems disappear.

  That if a man loved her, it’d make up for all that was lacking within herself.

  When Tori reached the office, Celeste was already there staring out at the rain through the window, her back to Tori. She turned and Tori paused in the act of taking another sip. It hit her that Celeste was getting older. Oh, she still looked great, still took care of herself physically, but the truth was there in the lines on the older woman’s face, in the silver in her dark hair.

  It gave Tori a pang to realize, to think that life was moving, as it always did, at amazing speeds and yet she was still here, still stuck. Always stuck.

  “What’s happened now?” Tori asked as she sat in the chair in front of the desk. �
�You look serious which means some new or bigger havoc has been wrought.”

  Smiling, Celeste came around the front of the desk to lean against the corner. “Nothing like that. I think our family’s had enough havoc, don’t you?”

  Though Tori’s father and Celeste had never married, though he’d never even asked her, Celeste was a part of their family. Had been one for as long as Tori could remember, first as Val’s best friend and now as her father’s partner.

  “Just because we’ve had our fill doesn’t mean the hammer’s not going to come down again. On our heads,” Tori said.

  Celeste’s smile widened. “You sound just like your mother.”

  Tori’s shoulders snapped back. “No need for insults.”

  “It wasn’t an insult,” Celeste said softly. “Your mother wasn’t all bad, you know. I realize it’s…easier to think she was, to only remember her flaws, but she was so much more.” Celeste met her eyes. “And I know you remember that about her.”

  She did, but she didn’t want to. It was easier to keep the pain at bay if she concentrated on Valerie’s flaws, on how much she’d hurt them all. “Mom left us. She walked away, she made that choice.”

  Celeste sighed and ran the back of her hand across her forehead. “She was selfish and vain, no doubt about it. She was…looking for something. For someone to fill something inside her. Ever since we were kids she was searching.... It was as if she was empty.”

  Tori was afraid she had that same emptiness, that same neediness, could become just as tragic a figure if she let her guard down, if she didn’t always protect her heart.

  “But your mother wasn’t just beautiful,” Celeste continued. “Though that’s the only thing people saw. She was smart, smarter than she gave herself credit for. And she was funny. My God, no one could make me laugh like your mother. She just…lit up a room. You remind me of her.”

  Tori squirmed. Hearing that from Celeste warmed her even as she wanted to deny it. “Layne looks more like her than I do.”

  “She does, but that’s not what I mean. You have her sense of humor, the way you look at life, so cautiously even while you try to take the world by storm, that’s all Valerie. How you read people, size them up. But you’re more than that. She didn’t have your ability to think through all the consequences before making a decision and she never worked as hard as you do. She always counted on her coworkers to pick up the slack for her, relied on her looks to get her by, but you rely on your brains, and on your hard work. I’ve known you ever since you were born, have loved you and your sisters all your lives and while I’m proud of them, I’m most proud of you.”