"Sure," I said. "I'd love to make you feel good."
"I would love that," she said with a shy giggle.
She lay down on the bed and spread her legs. I kissed my way up her inner thighs, until I reached her beautiful pussy, and then I slowly started licking her lips, and gently sucked her clit. I was in no rush. I knew she needed time to forget her nervousness. I was going to give her all the time in the world. This was all about her, so I would have sucked her clit for hours, if she wanted me to.
After a few minutes she moaned: "Oh my God, this feels really amazing!" I could tell she was really getting into it. She forgot the rest of the world for a little while, and all she could think about was my tongue circling her clit, teasing her relentlessly.
Then she asked me to put a finger inside of her while I was sucking her clit. She asked me if she could take pictures of me while I was licking her. Like this was a special occasion, and she always wanted to remember this moment. She took about 15 pictures, while moaning and pushing her pussy into my mouth. I loved making her feel this good. I would do it for her every day, if she wanted me to. I wanted her to know that she deserved to be treated nice, and to be happy and to feel good.
Patty used to tell me that she was so hung up on me, because I was the only guy who could make her cum, because apparently I was pretty good at going down on a girl. Maybe she just said that to make me feel special. I don't know. But every girl I've ever gone down on said I'm pretty good at it. Maybe that's my hidden superpower.
Afterwards Nicole asked me to fuck her. I told her I would like to take pictures of her, too. She got on top of me and rode my dick while posing for the camera. Then I got on top of her and took pictures of my dick inside of her. I loved having sex with her.
One day she told me she wanted to show me what she had learned from some black girls in prison. She stood on her hands, with her head facing the floor and her feet in the air. Then she leaned her feet against the wall, and she started twerking her butt like that. We both cracked up.
I asked her to do that again, but naked, and let me video tape her. She did. She was leaning on her hands, upside down, while wiggling her perfect ass and pussy in my face.
She was just awesome! I loved hanging out with her. Not just because of the sex. She just had a really great personality. I felt so comfortable around her, like we had known each other forever. And she was so down to earth. We always made each other laugh with stupid jokes and funny voices. She was a silly little dork in a pretty girl's body. The perfect combination.
They always say in romantic comedies that beautiful girls usually have shitty personalities, and ugly girls have beautiful personalities. And then there's the Holy Grail that's really hard to find: a beautiful girl with an ugly girl's beautiful personality. Nicole was it. She was every guy's dream girl.
LUCY AND NICOLE
"Prostitutes have very improperly been styled women of pleasure; they are women of pain, of sorrow, of grief, of bitter and continual repentance, without any hope of obtaining a pardon."
Unknown
"Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."
Plato
"To know even one life has breathed easier because
you have lived. This is to have succeeded."
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Nicole had slept at my house again the previous night, when Lucy called me to give her a ride to the Greyhound station, so she could visit her mother in Georgia and go to rehab. Nicole and I had sex that morning, and then I dropped her off at Lucy's grandfather's house. Later I returned to pick up Lucy and take her to the bus. It was the first time I had seen her in months. She felt self-conscious, because she had gained a lot of weight in jail. She asked me if I thought she was ugly now.
I said: "No, you'll never be ugly in my eyes, sweetie. Everyone gains weight in jail, and you should know by now that you will always be beautiful in my eyes, whether you're a skinny minnie, or you're 300 pounds."
That made Lucy smile, and she gave me a kiss. Then she said Nicole would like to come along for the ride. I said ok. Nicole got into my car, and for Lucy's benefit, we pretended not to have seen each other ever since she cleaned my house months ago. It was weird and awkward. Nicole and I kept giving each other looks in the rear view mirror.
We arrived late at the Greyhound station, and the bus was about to leave without Lucy. She and I jumped out of the car, and she grabbed my hand and led me around the building, to the bus. I knew right away that she really had no intention of getting on the bus and go to rehab, because she didn't grab her bags. She left them in my car. She asked the bus driver, if she could postpone her trip for a few days. He said no, her ticket was only valid for today.
The bus was actually going to drive from Fort Myers to Fort Lauderdale, and then from there to Orlando, and then from Orlando to Atlanda, Georgia.
Lucy asked the driver, if she could get on the bus in Orlando at 4 am, instead of boarding now in Fort Myers at 8 pm. He said yes.
I tried to tell Lucy to get on the bus now and not postpone the trip, or she would never go to rehab. She completely ignored me while talking to the bus driver. Afterwards she said she postponed the ride, so she and I could spend more time together, and then I could drive her to catch the bus in Orlando.
I kept looking at Nicole, hoping she'd say something, to convince Lucy to get on the bus, but she didn't. I could see in Nicole's eyes that she was high as a kite. Ever since Lucy got out of jail, she and Nicole were hanging out and doing more and more drugs together. It reminded me of the way Veronica and her mother Rachel were getting high together, when she got out of jail last time.
After we left the Greyhound station, I thought Lucy and I would spend some time together, because she said that was her reason for not getting on the bus. But once we arrived at her grandpa's house, to drop Nicole off, Lucy said she would go back in the house with her. I asked her why. She said she wanted to spend some more time with Nicole, before she went to rehab.
"You spent the last few days getting high with Nicole. But you and I haven't seen each other in months. I can't believe you'd rather go smoke more crack with her, than spend time with me," I said. It reminded me of what Veronica did with Kim after I picked her up from the Salvation Army.
First she denied that that was her reason for going back into the house with Nicole. But then she finally admitted it. She told me to go home. I was crushed.
I never did drive her to Orlando that night. The bus ticket expired the next morning, and Lucy never went to rehab.
Before, Nicole's drug habit had still been manageable. But now, being around Lucy, her habit was getting worse and worse. She was shooting up Ds, heroin, snorting coke, smoking crack and taking mollys. Slowly but surely, Nicole was getting just as bad as Lucy.
It really started to bother me, because I knew where she was headed: sucking dick and spreading her legs for a hundred guys on Backpage. That thought made my stomach turn. I didn't want to keep losing one girl after another to drugs and Backpage. I couldn't take it anymore.
I tried to talk to Nicole about it, but she said she was fine. She said she really wasn't doing that many drugs, and she was making enough money with tattoos to pay for her habit. She said she would never hurt me like Lucy did. Déjà vu. How many times did a drug addict tell me she wasn't going to treat me like the previous drug addict? How many times did a drug addict tell me she wasn't like the others?
But Nicole was getting flakier and flakier. She had told me she would cook me dinner on my birthday. She made a list of all the things I needed to buy so she could cook her special sweet and sour chicken. But then she just went ghost on my birthday and left me hanging. That really really hurt. That was when I knew this was the beginning of the end.
A day or two later, she told me she was really sorry for abandoning me on my birthday, and she said she would make it up to me tonight. But then she just disappeared again.
Another day or two later, she asked me to pick her up
after work. She was holding a sign at the car wash next to the Red Roof Inn in North Fort Myers. But when I asked her later that day when I should come get her, she disappeared again.
One of the nights she slept over, she walked out of the house in the middle of the night and disappeared for a few hours. When she got back at 4 am, she said she had met up with a dope boy at the Coconut Point Mall, to get some drugs. I asked who it was, and what took so long, but she was being evasive. Something wasn't right.
She was texting all the time. She told me she had some tattoo jobs. I drove her there, and then she disappeared again for many hours. She claimed she was working on the tattoo the whole time. But when she asked me to pick her up, she was somewhere completely different.
I had a feeling she was tricking, so I asked her about it. She started to cry and said: "I'm not that kind of girl! Ask anyone! I don't sleep around like that. I'm not like Lucy and those other girls."
But I could tell she was hiding something from me, and she wasn't being honest about where she was going or what she was doing, and who she was with. And since I already knew about her drug use, the only other thing worth hiding from me was having sex with someone else. So I was sure she was tricking. But she continued to deny it and got really emotional and defensive every time I questioned her about anything.
I told her that if she wanted to just be friends with benefits, fine, just say so. But since she and I had been talking about being in a real relationship together, and she had told me she loved me, it wasn't fair to lie to me, if she was still seeing other people.
"I swear I'm not seeing anyone else. I just want to be with you. You are the nicest guy I've ever met. I SWEAR I'm not having sex with anyone else," she said. She was in tears again.
She told me she loved me and gave me a kiss. I smiled and told her I loved her, too.
Later Lucy called me and told me she wanted to hang out. Nicole had disappeared again, doing who knows what with who knows who, so I had no reason not to hang out with Lucy. I took her home with me, and we talked all night. She told me she was sorry for writing the letter to Veronica and the one to Cho. She said she felt bad for the way things ended between us, when I found out she lied to me about me being the only one on her viso list.
Suddenly Jasmine called Lucy. Jasmine had returned from Key West a few weeks ago, and had been back in Fort Myers. She had already relapsed on her first day out, before she handed me the letters Veronica had written her in jail. Jasmine's mother was an alcoholic, and they both got drunk to celebrate her freedom. She shot up Ds just a few hours later.
She had pretended to be clean in Key West, but I could tell by her posts on her Facebook page, that she was behaving like every other addict who was in the process of relapsing after getting out of jail.
Veronica had cheated on me with Jasmine, and gotten her name tattoed on her wrist. But Jasmine had also dated Snickers at some point in the past, like everyone else in jail. And she was Abby's best friend. But ever since she returned from Key West, she was living with Wigger at Abby's house, sleeping with Wigger in Abby's bed. Abby's boyfriend Wigger had not only cheated on her with her own sister Tabby. Now he was cheating on Abby with her best friend Jasmine. What a guy, what a guy.
Jasmine and Wigger got into a fight, because he'd been cheating on her with some other girl. Jasmine had enough and wanted to get away from him, She called Lucy to see if she could stay with her. They had been in the same dorm in jail for a while. Lucy told Jasmine that she was staying at my house and offered that we could come get her.
A few weeks ago, Veronica had told me that someone really needed to tell Abby what a lowlife Wigger was, because he was cheating on Abby the whole time while she was in jail.
Take a moment to fully appreciate the irony in that. Go ahead, I'll wait.
Veronica felt bad that Wigger was cheating on Abby! Meanwhile she was cheating on me the whole damn time! She understood that Wigger was a fucking lowlife for doing that to Abby, but somehow it didn't sink in, that she was a fucking lowlife too, for doing exactly the same thing to me.
When Lucy got out of jail and we started hanging out again, she told me the same thing: someone needed to tell Abby what Wigger was doing being her back.
So I ended up writing Abby a letter. I didn't even know her, but I knew what she was going through, and I wanted to warn her about Wigger, just like people had warned me about Veronica. It was a simple act of kindness. She deserved to know. A real friend would have told her. But she had no real friends. All her so-called friends were drug addicts, who had no loyalty to anyone, and who would hit on Abby's man in a heartbeat, if there was drugs or money in it for them. Even her own sister Tabby betrayed her. And now her best friend Jasmine did, too.
After Abby got my letter, she asked Wigger if what I wrote was true. Of course he denied it, but he was really pissed at me.
So now there was a possibility that Jasmine's fight with Wigger in the middle of the night was just a trick, to get me to go there. Maybe he and his homeboyzzz were waiting for me. Well, I wasn't gonna let some little ghetto thugs intimidate me. After all, I had a gun now! What it do, homeslice? Holla!
I hid my gun on me and felt like James Bond. Lucy and I were on a mission! It was 3 am by the time we got to Abby's house. Jasmine got into the car and told Lucy that she was upset, because Wigger had been cheating on her. She was sick and tired of the way he was treating her, so she was done with him. On her way out, she stole some crack from him.
When we got home, Lucy hid in the bathroom and smoked Jasmine's crack for hours. She just wouldn't stop. She left the door unlocked, so Jasmine and I tried to get her to come out. But she was busy rearranging the towels. Over and over again, with the twitchy motions of a tweaking crackhead.
Lucy said that she wanted to watch Beautiful Creatures, so Jasmine and I were waiting for her on the living room couch. We kept calling her, but she wouldn't come. Then Lucy called me into the bathroom.
I went inside. She was still rearranging the towels. Then she said: "I just wanted to let you know that I'm a very jealous person, and it really bothers me that you are sitting in the living room with Jasmine."
Jasmine and I had been sitting on opposite ends of the couch. We really weren't doing anything, just talking, and we had been calling Lucy over and over, so we could finally start the movie. But to make her happy, now I sat in the bathroom with her, so she wouldn't feel jealous anymore. I was getting really tired. It was 6 am by now.
Suddenly Lucy decided to make dinner for all of us. At 6 am!
She had made a nice dinner for me a few days ago, right after Thanksgiving. We had wanted to spend the holiday together, but then she had been smoking crack around the clock instead, and tricking. So we decided to make up for it a few days later instead. She was proud of herself and sent pictures of the dinner she prepared for me to her grandpa and Nicole. I thought that was really sweet.
She decided to impress Jasmine with her cooking skills, and made a little bit of everything she could find in my fridge and freezer. She made a ton of food. Jasmine and I kept telling her that we really weren't hungry, but Lucy wouldn't take no for an answer. So we ate something to humor her. Jasmine was already nauseous from the Ds she had shot up, but eating dinner at 6:30 am pushed her over the edge and she started throwing up. I told her she could lie down in the guest room, but she said she didn't feel comfortable sleeping in a bed. She preferred sleeping on the couch. So I brought her some blankets and a little bucket, in case she had to throw up again.
Then I went to sleep. It was 7 am. Lucy kissed me good night and told me she would join me in bed in a minute. At 8 am I woke up, because Lucy sent me a text, telling me she'd be right in. She did that a lot, sending me texts while we were in the same house, but she was in one room, and I was in the other. I went back to sleep.
At 10 am my phone rang. It was a Global Tel call from jail. I hadn't heard from Veronica since before Thanksgiving, ever since Wendy was sent to D pod for screaming at Ka
thleen, because Wendy found out that Veronica was still sending love letters to Kathleen. I was done with her. I wasn't even thinking about her, while I had been spending time with Nicole and Lucy.
Sex and Crime: Oliver's Strange Journey Page 50