Collin remains unmoved. He’s known her too long. The real hurt happened long before they knew each other. Whatever the damage, he didn’t cause it and her unwillingness to deal with her father’s abandonment has lead her down her own path of pain. He had wanted to fix it once, but eventually realized no one can ever fix the damage caused by another. And after that, he distanced himself from her, knowing she would always look to him to fill a void that could never be filled by anyone but herself. Only she drew him back with one lie, a big one that changed his life. He won’t let her do it again.
“What does Flor have that I don’t?” She finally asks, cramming the papers back into the purse like used tissue.
There it is again, that unflappable resilience that allows her to bounce back from anything.
“She has my heart.”
Collin lets out a sigh of relief as he watches Suzann walk toward her car. What he wouldn’t give to see Flor right now. He went by her place after he saw Suzann, but she wasn’t home. He feels terrible for taking it so far last night. He shouldn’t have, and leaving the way he did, he wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t want to see him again. He takes out his phone and notices three missed calls from Eddie.
Collin jumps when he feels a hand on his shoulder. Being around Suzann has made him touchy and on edge. He ends the call before it finishes dialing.
“O pai dela está aqui,” Gecimar says.
“Who’s father?” The cowboy replies, quickly realizing the answer as soon as the question is out of his mouth.
“Is she back? Does she know?” Collin asks, panic beginning to set in. He hasn’t had a chance to tell her about being married. Now, she’ll soon learn that he’s known about her family all along.
“Dammit,” he shouts, clenching a fist. This, after enduring two visits in a single day with Suzann, is enough to send him through the roof. He is cursed with terrible timing. “She’ll know everything,” he mutters.
The old man nods and pats his shoulder.
Flor stands outside the gate of her house. Her house. How quickly she had adopted it and made it her own. The rumbling of the truck’s engine fades into the distance. She can feel Gary’s eyes on her, willing her to open it. “You’ve met my father before, haven’t you?”
The old man clears his throat. “He’s visited Belo Horizonte before.”
The young woman nods, more pieces falling into place. “Yeah, it figures.” Without saying anymore, she unlatches the gate and pushes it open.
Chapter 39
Flor takes tentative steps across the courtyard, counting each one as if marking time. Time stood still before this very moment. It carried her neither forward nor backward. Even as the days began to shorten ever so slightly, she was in a state of pure being where she hasn’t had to calculate the circumstances that have brought her to this place and time or where she will go next. Her father’s arrival will end all this. She can’t even begin to fathom why he’d show up here unannounced, let alone how he managed to leave Brazil since he had relinquished his passport to the judge overseeing his case. Questions flood her mind with every step until her thoughts become muddled and confused. She stops before the wide, open doors and takes a deep breath, the thoughts emptying along with the carbon dioxide.
Laughter fills the rooms to the left, and she follows it like beacon. One sound is loud and familiar. Her father is laughing as he’s regaling the listener with a story about how he’d uncovered an affair between his nanny and driver when he was seven. The other voice was low enough for Flor to recognize it as coming from a man, and despite her father telling the story in English, the responses were a mix of Spanish and English. Flor rounds the corner from the corridor into the kitchen. She can barely contain her rage when she sees Paco seated across from her father in the family room adjacent to the kitchen.
As soon as he sees her, her father springs out of the cream wingchair and scoops her into his arms. “Filha!” Gustavo kisses her cheeks, first right then left, repeating the ritual twice before holding her tight. “I’ve missed you, my beautiful.”
Flor looks down at the tile floor, embarrassed not so much by his display of affection, as she is by Paco witnessing it. She caught his sly smile when she was in her father’s embrace. Her father was always warm and expressive like this, and she prepared herself for another five minutes of “I’ve missed you” and “you’re even more beautiful than when I saw you last.” Of course he’d comment on her looks. Brazilians can’t help themselves. She likes that Collin hasn’t said anything about her beauty. Collin? She can’t believe he’d invade her thoughts at this moment. She shakes her head to rid herself of the memory of the other night.
“What do you mean, no?” Her father asks. “So you’re not surprised to see me?”
“Um, sorry, I mean that it’s really unexpected,” she says, quickly recovering. Flor nods in Paco’s direction. “You two seem to be getting along well. Like old friends, I imagine.” Ignoring her father, she grabs a bottle of water from the refrigerator then walks to family room to sit in the wingchair that had been occupied by her father. He follows and sits on the sofa next her.
“I heard my father telling you about the time when he saw his driver screwing his nanny in the back of the family’s car,” Flor says in Spanish. This is deliberate since her father prefers speaking English over Spanish. He actually confessed to loathing Castellano. Seeing Paco here makes her detest it a little too.
“Your father has quite a number of stories,” the Argentinian replies, shifting a bit in his seat. He looks impeccable in his dark jeans and navy button down. Paco crosses his left ankle over his knee, looking casual and confident, like a model in a photo shoot. Objectively, he’s one of the most gorgeous men Flor’s ever seen, his golden brown hair falling just above his gray/blue eyes. Her eyes sweep over his lips, and she recalls their kiss. She doesn’t doubt how much he would’ve taught her. Yet, it was all a façade. Flor can see that now. He was there not so much to seduce her as to watch over her. Perhaps getting her into bed would’ve just been a perk.
“I’m assuming you’ve heard a few over the years,” Flor says, trying to gauge exactly how long they’ve known each other. Paco is too young to be her father’s peer. “You’ve been to the fazenda in Paraná.”
Paco nods. “You’re extremely lucky to have such beautiful land and horses.”
“His father was one of our best breeders. When he wasn’t here, he was down there.”
“You kept him busy,” Paco comments drily.
“You work there now as well?” She asks, switching to Portuguese.
He uncrosses his legs and leans forward. “When I’m not here,” he replies.
Acid rises in Flor’s throat. She despises Paco and hates herself for kissing him. The mere idea of sleeping with him disgusts her now. How she could’ve allowed herself to be duped by him. Am I really that naïve? She wonders.
Paco had told her as much, and he was right. She didn’t recognize Collin had been hiding something from his past, just as Paco was hiding this from her. In the end, she had been hiding pretty much everything about herself as she tried to hide from her life. Like attracts like, doesn’t it?
Flor notices her father enjoying this exchange. Is this my fate? She can’t help but wonder. Attracting men like my father?
“It would be nice to be able to catch up with my father,” Flor says, getting up from her chair. “Maybe you guys can talk a bit later.” About horses . . . or me, or whatever.
Paco stands and follows her out to the courtyard. Her father hangs back, opting instead to pour himself a whisky from the bar.
“Sleeping with you would’ve been one my biggest regrets,” Flor says, opening the gate.
He looks her in the eyes and runs a finger up her neck, tilting her head back. Her skin prickles at his warm touch. “I highly doubt that, Flor.”
Ugh, the way he says her name. She can almost feel his tongue on her, and his quiet whispers telling her precisely what he’d do. Flor
takes two steps back. “Guess you won’t have a chance to find out.”
She turns around to see her father watching. Of course he’d see it. Nothing about her life on the ranch has been as private as she’d chosen to believe. Her father knows more than she’d thought possible. Now she wants the truth.
Flor walks up to him and says, “Tell me everything now, or so help me, you will never see me again.”
Chapter 40
“How much will he tell her?” Gecimar asks Gary. The two men, who’ve been at Belo Horizonte since its inception walk past the paddock into the wide, open field. Little has changed about the land itself. It’s as familiar to them as the day Gustavo Sr. introduced them to it. First came Gecimar, followed a few years later by Gary. Gustavo Sr. was an ambitious man, but this wasn’t going to be one of his great ventures. Setting up a modest horse ranch was fueled more by personal desire than ambition.
Gecimar had been born at the de Lima family fazenda. It was the only world he knew. His kinship with Gustavo couldn’t be explained by words, although the closest one could come to describing their relationship would be like brothers, Gecimar being the older, nurturing caretaker of the two. He’d admired the confident Gustavo who pursued every crazy idea he’d had. And when his quasi-brother had moved to New York to realize his dreams of expanding his family’s wealth, well, Gecimar figured that if anyone was going to do it, it would be Gustavo.
He was right, of course. The de Lima family fortune grew beyond everyone’s expectations. Gustavo built an empire, but never forgot his friend at the fazenda. So when Gustavo asked him to carry out a very secret venture in California, how could he say no? Gustavo had a way of making dreams come true, and Gecimar wanted to be a part of it.
The old man never regretted leaving Brazil. Being poor in Brazil is far worse than being poor in America. Not that Gustavo Sr. would allow him to remain poor. Gecimar had a better life thanks to his friend, one that allowed him to buy a house and send his only son to school. He worked his way out of poverty, which is something that couldn’t have happened in Brazil.
“Why do you think he’d come all this way?” Gary asks him.
Gecimar shrugs, plucking a tall weed out of the ground. “Maybe he just wants to see his daughter.”
“It’s hard to believe he’d take such a big risk for a bit of father/daughter time.”
They walk on quietly for a while, until the stables are out of sight. The two men used to go on regular walks, taking pride in the ranch they had helped build. But after Gary’s second heart attack, he wasn’t often up for long treks.
“You called La Señhora?” The old man asks him.
Gary nods. “As soon as I heard Gustavo was at the airport.”
Gecimar lifts the front of his hat slightly and wipes the sweat from his brow before lowering it again. His eyes look out on the hills in the distance. He loves this land. It’s his only home as far he’s concerned. It has brought him nothing but peace. The troubles in his life were left behind in Brazil. Now, they’ve come to rest at his doorstep.
“You’ll make sure Junior leaves tomorrow?” He asks, referring to Gustavo by his childhood nickname.
“Of course, my friend.”
Gecimar looks sternly at Gary. He knows the horse trainer didn’t invite him. Junior always liked stirring up trouble. The old man listened to Gustavo Sr. express his worries over how his son would do taking over the business. At first, it all seemed to go well, so it seemed his late friend’s concerns were unwarranted. Yet, like most Brazilians, Gecimar remained cautious. Good things don’t stay good forever.
Chapter 41
Flor scrolls through her texts while her father paces the length of the family room. His phone conveniently rang just as he was about to explain his presence. She doesn’t bother to listen either since it seemed the person on the other end was his lawyer yelling at him for leaving the country. When she hears her father promise to return the following day, sadness overshadows her relief. Of course she wants him gone, but part of her feels at least some comfort being in the presence of a familiar face. Family stuff is so complicated.
Her heart jumps when she sees a text from Collin. U ok? He asks.
She realizes he must know her father is here. Flor replies with a thumbs up sign.
Can I come over?
Not right now, she types. Despite being angry at Collin for lying to her, she wants answers from him. There’s no way she can leave for Smith before he explains himself to her. But she has to deal with her dad first.
“Let me look at you,” her father says, startling Flor out of her texting stream.
Flor turns in her seat. “You could’ve done that over Skype.”
Gustavo smiles, running a hand over his two-day scruff. He looks tired, his tan linen trousers and white button shirt wrinkled from the long journey. Flor notices he’s lost a bit of weight and has a few new wrinkles around his eyes. Otherwise, he’s still the handsome man everyone told her she resembled.
“Seems you’re never available to talk anymore.”
“Been busy. There’s a lot of work here, and I’ve been studying for the GRE.” Not to mention being totally preoccupied with a certain cowboy.
Her father moves over to the sofa and pats the seat next to him. Flor gets up but sits down on the wingchair instead. “Still planning on becoming a vet?”
She nods, relaxing in his presence. It’s comfortable being able to talk to someone who knows her well. Even if his view is still paternalistic, it’s less effort than revealing oneself to complete strangers.
Gustavo regards her warmly. “I’ve missed talking to you. You were always the sanest one in the family. I was out riding the other day, and I think I spent ten minutes talking to my horse.” He laughs.
“You’re probably better off. Animals aren’t so judgmental.” She immediately bites her bottom lip and looks away.
Gustavo sits motionless, stunned by her words. He’s never corrected his daughter. He’s never had to. It’s in her nature to be kind and understanding. So when it seemed she didn’t want to visit him in Brazil, he understood she needed time to forgive him. He felt he’d given her enough time, years as a matter-of-fact, yet she hasn’t come around. Not coming to Brazil this summer hurt him more than he would admit to anyone. He accepted that it was time to let her go and live her life, but the devoted father in him couldn’t fully accept it. Then, when he heard, when he got that phone call, he knew he had to intervene.
Flor picks at a piece of blue lint left from a cashmere throw, not wanting to look at him. A few long minutes pass. Gustavo sips the last drop of his whisky and gets up to refill his glass. Flor stares off at a painting above the mantle. As soon as her father returns to his seat she says, “Tell me why you’re here and don’t try to bullshit me.”
Chapter 42
Gustavo continues to drink his whisky for a few minutes before clearing his throat. “I heard you were starting to get close to the horse trainer who works here.”
Flor’s jaw drops. Of all the reasons she could think of that would compel her father to risk actual jail time for escaping house arrest, getting close to a guy didn’t even make the top five.
“You’ve got to be kidding,” she finally replies. As much as she would like to scream at him for all sorts of violations of privacy and lack of trust in his own daughter, she knows it won’t give her the answers she needs.
Her father’s furrowed brow tells her he’s not.
“That’s my private life. I’ve been on my own long enough, and you never questioned my choices in men before.”
“They weren’t Collin Taylor.”
Flor’s face is becoming hot, her palms clammy. She could easily tell him the truth, that she’s not even seeing Collin, although would that be the truth, she wonders. Earlier today, it certainly was. And she doesn’t plan to change her mind. Collin lied to her about Suzann. Well, technically he wasn’t forthcoming about his relationship status when she asked. But they got physical enough th
at she deserved more honesty from him. That alone is reason enough for her to let him go. Yet, she doesn’t want to give her father the satisfaction of telling him that she’s not as involved with Collin as he thinks.
“Collin is a good guy,” she replies quietly, mostly believing her words. Other than his lies of omission, he’s been completely respectful and kind toward her, which is a lot more than she could say about Paco. Paco!
“Paco’s your spy, I take it.”
“Not spy. I’d say more like watchful caretaker.”
“Is that what you call a man who stuck his tongue down my throat and groped me?”
Her father clenches his jaw. “He couldn’t be a fucking monk like his father, could he?”
“Says you?” Flor raises an eyebrow.
“I may have a reputation, Flor, but I’d never take advantage of someone’s daughter, especially one so young.”
“I’ll be twenty-two this year, Dad.”
Gustavo throws back the rest of his drink. “As if I need reminding.”
“You disapprove of Collin?” Flor asks, returning to the topic. “He’s nice.” A bit of a liar, however, what he can do with his tongue and body . . . . The thought distracts Flor momentarily.
Her father nods. “You are a de Lima. You don’t go around with horse trainers.”
Flor stands and pours herself a finger of whisky. She never took to the taste, but feels like she needs something to fortify her.
“I never took you for an elitist, Father.”
“When it comes to my daughter, I can’t help myself.”
“It’s hypocritical of you. You get to fuck whomever you want.”
Her father slams his glass down. “You are a girl, Flor. Your reputation matters more, and you deserve better than him.”
“You sound like Mom. Let me guess, now you want me to consider marrying Bruno Silva.” Bruno is the young scion of the Silva construction company. His family developed most of the large infrastructure in Brazil. Flor’s mother has pushed the union since the young woman had left Rosey. She understood her mother’s intense desire to secure a financial future for her daughter much as she had found with Flor’s father. But her mother should know security is merely an illusion. Yet, Gustavo never pushed Flor, encouraging her to finish school and find a fulfilling career path. Love, he had told her, complicates marriage but garners more loyalty than money. He was right. When the money ran out, her mother was gone.
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