by Karen Anders
Marie, who had followed behind Dylan, spoke up. “Dylan. Do you know this woman writes a sex column?”
Dylan looked at the woman as if he didn’t see her. “Yes.”
Haley felt her insides turn to knots. Margo’s confession burned a hole in her heart. And anger made her snap. She turned to the woman, the words on her lips to deny that she was Haley Lawton and wrote for SPICE to save Dylan the embarrassment of knowing her. She might despise what Margo and Dylan had done to her, but Haley was not vindictive.
“Yes, she writes articles for SPICE Magazine and she does it very well.”
She looked at him, surprised, wondering if he had some ulterior motive for announcing this to the one person at the party who could damage his career. “I’ve got to go. I’m so sorry. But I’ve got to go.”
Dylan wouldn’t let go of her arm. “Haley. I’ve got to talk to you. Can you just give me a minute?”
“Our time has run out. I don’t ever want to see you again.” The firmness in her voice left him no opening.
“Haley, let me explain,” he said, hurting, wanting to take back all the words he’d said in the hotel room. Tears welled in her eyes and it physically hurt him to see them.
“I saw you with Margo.”
“I can explain that.”
“I just bet you can. I just don’t want you to. I’m sure she’ll be much more suitable for you than I could ever be.”
“Dylan?”
Mr. Westin came up to them, and it distracted Dylan long enough to break his grasp.
Haley fled the building, hailing a cab on the fly. Three went by without stopping and she wanted to scream. She crossed the street and kept walking. A disquieting coldness settled deep inside her, and Haley tried to grasp even one solid denial. But there was nothing, nothing, just a sickening feeling.
When she saw another Yellow Cab, she raised her arm. Mercifully, the cab stopped and she opened the door and climbed in.
THROUGH THE GLASS DOORS of the hotel, Dylan watched Haley get into a taxi.
“Dylan, I’d like to speak to you.”
He whirled. “I really don’t want to hear any more lectures about how unsuitable Haley is. I don’t give a damn what you think. I love her, and if she’ll say yes I’m going to ask her to be my wife,” he growled into Donald’s surprised face.
“Simmer down there, young man. I was just about to apologize for the way we acted. We really misjudged your young lady.”
“I particularly don’t care what you think. My young lady is getting away, so if you’ll excuse me.”
Dylan ran for the door, but watched in stunned pain as the cab disappeared around the corner. It was his fault that she thought he was having an affair with Margo and that Haley thought he preferred Margo because she ran in the same social circle as he did. Margo was his assistant. There was nothing personal between them. He’d have to convince Haley of that as soon as he found her.
“I WAS AN IDIOT.”
She and her sister had taken over the task of baking a cake for their uncle’s birthday. Haley had run to her family, and her sister and mother had comforted her all day.
“Haley, you’re not an idiot. So you fell in love with a guy you were having fantasies with. A lot of us just get the fantasies.”
“Fantasies don’t hurt, Terry,” Haley said with a hitch in her breath.
“True.”
“And the men in fantasies don’t pursue your best friend,” Haley said as she flipped one of the round cake pans onto a plate, releasing a delicious aroma of freshly baked chocolate cake.
“He’s a jerk. You’re better off without him. He doesn’t deserve you.” Terry ticked off her points on her fingers.
Haley smiled. “Thanks, Terry, for those old tried-and-true sayings.”
“You’re welcome,” she said, hugging Haley around the shoulders. “Why don’t you take a trip?”
“Sure, that’ll be good. I’ll go to a place filled with couples in love. That’ll boost my spirits.”
“I’ll go with you and we’ll rag on them together.” Haley didn’t think she could laugh but she did.
Terry handed her a knife and Haley marveled at how different she was from her sister. Terry was taller, a stunning brunette, and her eyes were more violet than blue.
Haley dipped the knife in the frosting bowl and began to frost the cake. “At least I never told him I love him.”
Terry opened the oven and checked the roast. “That’s a blessing. But you got what you wanted. Kate did notice you and did ask for your articles.”
“Too bad I can’t keep the job.” Haley sighed, a sigh torn from a desolate, injured place in her soul. She silently accepted that she’d be feeling just as terrible if she had confessed her feelings to Dylan. She might have been able to deceive herself for a little longer that he might have returned her love, but believing a fantasy wouldn’t have been a good thing in the end.
“What do you mean?” Terry asked.
“I can’t stay at SPICE.” Haley put the second layer on the cake and started frosting the top.
“Why not?”
“My best friend will be dating the man I love. Could be pretty problematic seeing her every day.”
“Right. I see the point,” Terry conceded, giving Haley’s arm a squeeze.
“You know, I thought leaving SPICE would matter more, but it really doesn’t. What was exciting and wonderful was sharing those fantasies with Dylan.”
“Would you do it again, knowing the outcome?”
“I would. I really would.”
Her sister pulled her into a tight embrace. “Then, Haley, you shouldn’t have any regrets. That’ll make it easier to move forward.”
Haley hugged her sister back just as tightly. “Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t like to rewrite the ending, but I know I can live with my choices.”
Margo and Dylan. It hurt too bad to even think it, but she’d seen it with her own eyes. Her best friend and the man she loved had both admitted that they were having an affair.
She’d already finished her column and sent it to Kate. Monday morning she would clean out her office and then she’d start looking for a new job. She couldn’t bear to work at SPICE now.
She had tried to be so brave and pretend that it had all been worth it. And it had been. She’d done things she’d never thought she could do, become the bold and adventurous woman she wanted to be. But she hadn’t realized that being adventurous came with risks. It didn’t seem fair that she would lose it all now.
She looked at Terry as tears filled her eyes. She’d lost everything that mattered to her. “What am I going to do? I love him so much. What am I going to do?”
She turned in her sister’s arms and wept. Terry smoothed her hair. After she’d finished crying, she felt much better.
“You know,” Haley said, “I think I will take a trip.”
“Where are you going to go?” Terry asked.
“Someplace to get Dylan out of my system.”
13
WHAT WAS SHE THINKING going to Hawaii by herself? Maui, no less.
Why did she think walking those black sand beaches would cure her of loving Dylan? She could become one of those pathetic, dramatic creatures haunting the sands of Maui, looking for her lost love. The lack of sleep must be getting to her.
She should be in her hotel room all cozy and snug in her bed. But, you see, that was the problem. She couldn’t sleep. She couldn’t eat and she sure was tired of crying.
Kate had been eager to give her the time off when Haley promised a wonderful column from the beautiful island of Hawaii. The thing was due tomorrow and she hadn’t been able to write a word.
She couldn’t get Dylan out of her head. He always seemed to be there. The color green reminded her of his eyes. Hearing a motorcycle roaring down the street made her think of the way he’d look all in leather. And the scent of cinnamon made her cry.
She pushed the disturbing thoughts away from her.
She couldn’t s
eem to get control over her feelings. One minute she was crying and the next she was an angry lunatic.
She was in such a beautiful place. She should try to enjoy it. To the left of her on a gentle slope there was a riotous tangle of lush greenery and a wild assortment of flowers of different shapes and colors that grew in multicolored chaos. The air was filled with the intoxicating fragrance of the delicate blossoms. Large ferns swayed in the gentle wind coming off the ocean, while above, exotic palm trees gave a small measure of cooling shade during the day. The ocean was a glittering turquoise-jeweled blanket that spread out, disappearing into the horizon, and she decided she would spend all of the next day playing in the black sand, enjoying the surf and soaking up the sun.
Haley could see the volcano Haleakala rise up in transparent misty darkness, solid and mysterious in the distance. Haleakala stood like a sentinel, seemingly to guard Maui as if the island was one of its tiny babies. Before she left Hawaii, she wanted to view the crater at sunrise.
She had some notion that perhaps if she asked, when she reached the lip of the crater, the Goddess of Fire would burn this love she had for Dylan right out of her soul.
She thought a lot about that dream she’d had in White Haven, remembering that it was just as vivid today as the day she’d had it weeks ago. Her heart would break even more thinking about losing Dylan. Remembering how he’d said he wanted to see her naked body through the crystal clearness of the water.
She lowered her weary, defeated body into the soft sand, so discouraged and disillusioned that her energy seemed to have deserted her for the time being.
She stared out at the water and watched the bottom silver wedge of the moon inch its way slowly into the blazing star-studded glory of the night sky.
She wrapped her arms around her body for comfort, but she could find none in the starlit night, in the quiet serene sea, or in herself.
“Seems like such a beautiful spot to be alone.”
Haley sat motionless. It couldn’t be him. It was just her imagination. When she turned her head, it would be a guy who just sounded like him.
But when she turned her head, it was Dylan standing in the moonlight, looking so good, so handsome. The wind teased the ends of his dark hair, tossing strands across his forehead. His expression was unreadable. He stood with his hands in the pockets of his denim shorts.
She rose to her feet and folded her arms over her chest. “What are you doing here?” Haley asked, scolding herself for drinking in the sight of him. Didn’t she have any pride at all?
“I went to Hillcrest and begged your parents to tell me where you went. I got on my knees. Your mother insisted I get up and gave me chocolate chip cookies. They were delicious,” he added.
“My mother gives cookies to the mailman. She doesn’t like him that much.”
“Your mother likes me, by the way.”
“My mother suffers fools very well.”
His teeth flashed in the darkness. “You can hold your own, Haley.”
She went to go by him. “I’m leaving. If you think you can show up in this romantic spot and I’m going to fall into your arms, you’re crazy.”
He reached for her and brought her up against him, his green eyes boring into hers. “I am crazy. I’m crazy about you. Dammit, Haley. There was nothing between Margo and I. Not a thing. She contacted me to get a job and that’s her only crime.”
“But she told me at the party.”
“She thought you were asking her about the job. Not about a relationship between us. Don’t you see? It was a misunderstanding.”
“Margo may have been a mistake, but what about all the others?”
“What others?”
“Well, let’s see.” She ticked them off on her fingers. “Your next-door neighbor with her key. Laurel. The scores of women that you’ve brought to that out-of-town B&B. Do I need to go on?” She glared up into his handsome face.
He smiled. “My next-door neighbor has a key because she waters my plants and thinks that I’m available to her whenever she has a fight with her boyfriend. Which I have to say happens often.”
“Fights with her boyfriend?”
“Plenty of women ask me for advice.” He hauled her closer. His hand came up to cup her face. His thumb gently trailed along her cheekbone as if it was on fire.
“Oh.”
“Laurel is my sister. She helped me with the ice-and-leather fantasy. Said that some women really go for motorcycles and leather-clad guys.” His hand went into her hair, combed through the heavy mass.
“Oh. That really was your neighbor and your sister?”
“Yes. You’re the only woman I’ve ever taken to White Haven. It was a boyhood refuge and a place where I can relax. I wanted to share that with you.” His voice was raw and shaking. “I wanted to give you a piece of my soul.”
“You said you didn’t keep count of the women you took there.”
“I said that to drive a wedge between us.”
“Oh,” she whispered raggedly.
“Is that all you can say?”
When she stood there looking at him with a soft, tender look on her face, the deep well of loneliness that had plagued him for most of his life began to dry up.
“It’s not going to be easy loving me, Haley. But I’m not giving you up.”
With a soft cry, she threw her arms around his neck. “The more I was with you, the more I wanted to be with you. It scared me because you’d dated so many women in college and I didn’t want to be another statistic. I let my emotion and feeling for you carry me away. I couldn’t imagine you with anyone else. When I thought you and Margo were…well, it looked to me like your old ways hadn’t changed.”
“Those women meant nothing to me, Haley. I wanted you, even in college, but I didn’t want you to have deal with all that society baggage.” He held her body tightly to his; she could feel the hammering of his heart.
“So you never had any old ways in college?”
“No. I was the guy all the girls liked to hang around because I’m sensitive.”
“Yeah, you’re sure that,” she said wryly and hugged him harder.
Dylan smiled.
“What about all those women’s clothes at the cabin?”
“Laurel keeps a lot of clothes there, Haley.”
“Oh.”
He gave a huff of laughter and hugged her harder. “Are we back to that again?”
“So you’re not interested in every woman that crosses your path?”
“No. I’m only interested in one tantalizing, flamboyant beauty.”
“Flamboyant? Didn’t you think I wouldn’t fit in with your firm?”
“At one time I thought that was important. Now I realize that I’m in love with you and I was trying to deny it because I didn’t want you to get hurt.”
“What did you say?” Haley grabbed his polo shirt, staring up into his eyes.
“About you getting hurt?” he asked, looking confused.
“No, not that part, you fool.”
“I love you, Haley,” he whispered, his voice uneven. “I wanted more, from the very beginning, but I was afraid of the consequences you would have to pay if I took what I wanted.”
“What about that image thing?”
“Who gives a damn about that. It was just another wedge. If the Westins have a problem with my wife, I’ll go out on my own. Open my own ad agency. I won’t let anyone tell me that you’re not right for me. Because I know you are,” he said fiercely. “You are perfect for me.”
“I was afraid that I would fall in love with you and I didn’t want to.”
“Why?”
She snuggled up to him, the muscles of his chest hard beneath her palm. “I thought you wouldn’t be willing to give up the others to be with me. Only me. And I couldn’t settle for anything less.”
He kissed her, soft, warm and seductive as sin.
“You won’t have to settle for less, Haley. I love you. I love only you. I’ll always only love you
. Marry me?”
He pulled a ring box out of his shorts and handed it to her. Haley took the box out of his hands, her eyes stunned.
He kissed her again. “Marry me, Haley. I can’t live without you.”
She opened the box and looked at the exquisite diamond sitting in black velvet. With trembling fingers, she removed the ring from the box. He took it from her and slipped it on her finger.
She looked down at the ring then up at him. “I love you, Dylan.”
He smiled, his teeth flashing in the moonlight. “Remember at the cabin when I told you I wanted to see your body bathed in moonlight through the crystal-clear water of this beach.”
She took his hand and led him to the water’s edge.
The water was warm as it lapped against Haley’s bare feet, the night quiet and serene. He stopped and looked out toward the ocean at the dark horizon, as if the sky and water had melded. His face was in profile to her as the gentle breeze ruffled the strands of his dark hair.
The moonlight played over his face, creating tantalizing planes of shadow and light. He turned his face to hers, breathing in the fragrance of her hair. “Your hair smells like sunshine. I can never get enough of you.” Dylan cupped Haley’s face between his palms, and he kissed her fervently, his mouth devouring hers.
His words caused a yearning inside her and her hands slid up his chest over his shoulders, joining at the nape of his neck. Although she had felt the intoxication of his body many times, an overpowering need surged through her and she pressed her aching body against the hard strength of him, feeling his immediate desire and simultaneous surrender.
When Haley went to take her pale pink tank off, he pushed her hands away and slowly and sensually ran his hands along her rib cage, bringing the shirt with him. Once he had it off, his head dipped down to the swelling of her breasts and he kissed the satin skin as he reached back and deftly divested her of the lacy bra. Then his hands were at her waist and he removed her khaki walking shorts, squatting and pulling them down her body, pausing when his face was level with her stomach, where he pressed hot kisses against her skin.
They sank into the warm surf, their bodies coming together in feverish, desperate need. He looked down at her, his breath hitched. “I knew you’d be beautiful, Haley,” he said softly, staring at her through the clear water.