~
Once the fires were going the night and the concerns seemed held back by the flames along with the darkness. Soon the smell of roasting beef filled the air. Conner found himself leaned back against one of the vehicles, sipping coffee. Debbie sat next to him.
She sat her own coffee cup down, reached over and covered his hand with her own. His eyes met hers. She leaned closer to him.
“I was wondering what a woman has to do to get you to notice her,” she said. Her eyes were red, her smile vague.
The Nation
“Hey,” Cammy smiled. “I thought you were just going to go on sleeping forever.”
Beth levered her arms down to scoot up in the bed and nearly banged the stump of her arm against the side of the bed before Cammy stopped her.
“Honey... Honey... Your arm. You have to be careful,” Cammy told her. She took her under the arms and lifted her gently back into the pillows.
“Oh God,” Beth whispered through her dry lips as she stared down at the stump of her arm. “Somebody chopped off the rest of my arm.” Her eyes came up to Cammy's own.
“Honey, Sandy had to take it. It was infected,” Cammy told her. She gently pushed her back into the pillows. Sandy appeared over her shoulder with a wooden cup of water. Cammy took it and helped Beth to take a sip. “Easy, Honey, just go slow,” she told her.
Beth cleared her throat and took a larger sip. “Oh my God... I have such a bad headache. Kind of sick to my stomach too.”
Sandy took her hand, and her fingers rested lightly against her wrist for a moment, feeling for her pulse. “The stomach is a couple of things, most likely. I have no idea when the last time you ate is, but I would bet it's been a few days. Pain killers and penicillin on an empty stomach are tough. I gave you a sports drink when I could get you to swallow, but you need real food. The headache is probably the morphine. You've been living on it the last few days. I can give you some aspirin for that.”
“She told me I couldn't have aspirin,” Beth said as she looked at Cammy. “Said I had to have the Morphine.” She licked her lips for what seemed like an hour and then took another deep sip from the glass Cammy still held.
“She wouldn't take it at first, true,” Cammy agreed with a laugh.
“Said I had balls... Thinks I don't remembner... Rember,” she sighed.
Cammy laughed. “Remember... Remember, Honey. Yes. I asked you if you had balls,” she turned to Sandy and her arched eyebrows. “She wanted to take only aspirin after Adam took her arm off.”
Beth nodded. “I did. She talked me into Morphine, and now look at this... I woke up with the rest of it gone too.”
“Only from the elbow down,” Sandy said. “You're lucky.”
Beth tried a lopsided smile on and then took another sip of the cold water.
“Listen, Honey, you needed the Morphine. You still do, really, and you can still have it if you want it. It just plays hell with your body when you've been on it a few days,” Sandy told her.
Beth took a deeper sip that was more like a real drink. “That is really good water,” she said.
Cammy and Sandy both laughed. “How about a sandwich, soup, broth? What do you think you can handle?” Sandy asked her.
“I think I can handle some more water,” Beth said.
“I'm sure you can. And you need liquid. I just want there to be some nourishment in it,” Sandy told her.
“Hot anything doesn't sound good. My stomach is still off,” Beth said.
“How about some cooled beef broth? Soup? Doesn't have to be hot,” Sandy agreed.
Beth swallowed, took a deeper drink of the cold water and nodded.
Billy And Pearl
“Bill, Billy... William?” Pearl asked.
“Billy's good,” Billy told her. “William makes me feel... too high class, I guess.”
Pearl laughed. “It's not wrong to think proper of yourself.”
The two were walking slowly down through the valley in the near twilight. Billy looked around at the valley. “You came with them? Helped to build this? It's awesome... really incredible.”
“I would love to say it is so, but no, I was here visiting family, in the states, I mean. I came across country with friends I only met them after the fact. I've been here about three months so far. I believe this place began in April. I arrived in June,” she brushed a shock of thick brown hair out of her eyes and looked up at Billy. “I did help to build the second and third barns. The rest has been catch what comes, for all of us really.”
“I could listen to you speak for hours,” Billy said. He blushed a second later. Pearl blushed too and looked up at the clear blue sky and then back down at the stone path they walked. “What will you do?” Pearl asked.
“Well, I'll wait for Adam to come back. When we left, we really didn't talk about it. I just don't know yet.” He looked up at the sky and then back down to the stone flagged pathway. “He may not want to stay.”
Pearl nodded. “And if this Adam of yours decides to go, then you will go with him, I suppose. That man thing. All for one and one for all... follow you to the ends of the Earth?”
Billy laughed, but stopped when he looked back down at Pearl. “I...” He started. She smiled up at him, and he lost his words.
“I didn't mean to do that to you,” she said. “Take away your words.”
He thought of a dozen retorts but said nothing for a second. “Well, maybe I would have said something dumb. I wouldn't have meant to. I suck at conversations like this, Pearl.”
She nodded. “Is she your girl? Jamie?” She blushed harder. “You don't have to answer; it's really not my business. I'm sorry.”
“No... No... Don't be sorry,” Billy told her. “Is she my girl?” He looked at her frankly. “No. Probably was once upon a time. In fact was... but I screwed that up, like a few other things I've done.” Billy looked away.
“Look,” Pearl told him. “Doesn't matter. I pry too much sometimes. I know that about me. Come with me if you like. I have to make a patrol. Just the valleys, foothills, takes most of two days to do. I have a truck with four wheel drive, a camping tent that I never use, and I go around and check all the perimeters. Boring, I suppose, unless you like the solitude... the mountains,” She smiled up at him. He towered over her by at least a foot. “I promise, no dead people, at least there never has been. Of course I'm looking for them though, aren't I?”
Billy laughed. “Just like that?”
Pearl stopped on the path and looked up at him. “Just like that? What did you think, then?”
“Uh... I.”
Pearl burst into laughter, slipped her arm through his and pulled him forward once more on the path. “Rattled you. I did, no use contradicting it.”
Billy laughed after a second. “You did. You did,” he caught up, leaving her arm where it was. “So two days?”
“You'll love it,” she told him.
“Okay. What do I need to do?”
“Not a thing. No one to say goodbye to?”
“No,” Billy agreed.
“Then we go.” She pulled at his arm. “Come on. I'll show you the truck.”
Burial
When they had thought about setting aside an area for burials they had discussed it as a committee. They had chosen the enclosed area for a reason. The rock walls went straight up on all sides. The entrance was an iron gate specially built and kept locked. The soil went deep, but nothing grew here. What soil there was, was in near constant shade except when the sun stood straight up in the sky. It wasn't long enough to encourage anything to grow.
The first times they had used it they had been unsure whether the dead they put there would stay dead. The radio waves were filled with horror stories, but they had listened, followed advice, and the dead had stayed dead. The sheer rock walls were an added protection they had not yet needed.
It was early morning and Arlene was tired as she and Sandy carried the body through the gate and set it down. Lilly had spoken words over it
from her Bible earlier. Looking at the dead man, knowing what could become of him, Arlene had an uneasy feeling about her baby. She shrugged it off, pushed it to the back of her mind.
“I got it, Sandy.” Arlene told her.
Sandy looked relieved to be able to leave. Susan peeked in through the gate. Nothing had stopped her, but her own unwillingness to step through the gate and into the cemetery. Sandy slipped out through the gate, stood momentarily embarrassed, unsure, and then walked away with Susan. Craig came in through the gate. He took the shovel from Arlene.
“I have to... I have to make sure,” Arlene told him.
Craig looked at her.
Arlene sighed. “They almost always come back now... They never used to... Even so I would... I would have to make sure... You probably don't want to see this... Be here for it.”
“Out in the world, this is part of life. I know that sounds crazy, but after you do it a few dozen times it becomes part of life. I don't want to say a normal part of life, but in the sense that it is an ongoing routine, it is a normal part of life now. Who knows if there is anything that can be done for them... Some people believe there is. That is the biggest problem I have seen. People unwilling to do what must be done...” He smiled, a small smile, sadness riding with it across his face. “I can dig or I can take care of him... It shouldn't all be on you,” Craig told her.
Arlene nodded, tears threatening. Whether from emotion, the exhaustion she felt; the acknowledgment of what needed to be done, or just the simple act of kindness from Craig, she didn't know.
“In fact,” Craig told her. “Just rest... I got this.” He took the pistol from her hand. She had been unaware that she had drawn it. The tears escaped and streamed down her cheeks and he pulled her close, whispering in her ear as he hugged her close. “Just go out and sit. Close your eyes. Let the sunlight fall on your face. Feel alive... I'll be there in a few minutes... Okay?” Arlene nodded against his chest. She pulled back.
“Thank you,” she managed. She turned and walked out of the rock enclosure and into the soft sunlight of the morning beyond the gate. A few minutes later she heard the shot she had expected. She leaned her head back against the rock, feeling the warmth of the sunlight upon her eyelids and fell into a light sleep.
Conner
On The Road
Conner smiled. “I have a woman in my life that means everything to me, but if I didn't...” He let his words trail off.
“Oh sure,” Debbie said, a little embarrassed. “The old, But if I didn't, brush off.” She smiled to show she was kidding. “So, everything, huh?”
Conner nodded. “Everything... And we'll have our own child running around by this time next year. She's pregnant. I miss her and I can't wait to get back.”
“I'll have that, I hope.” Debbie said.
“I think you will. I wasn't kidding. You remind me of Katie. Straight forward. No Bullshit, real,” Conner said.
Debbie laughed. “I'll take that as an endorsement. Anybody asks I'll tell them what you said.”
“Hey,” Chloe asked. “Anybody join this party?”
She sat down on the other side of Conner, but she only had eyes for Debbie. Conner saw it immediately, and he didn't know what to think about it. After all she had just come on to him, did Chloe stand a chance in her pursuit? You don't even know if that is her intention, Conner told himself, but inside he knew it was true; felt it. She was interested. It was the way she spoke to her. The way she looked at her. It was probably just attraction right now, but given time. A second later Aaron sat down across from him.
“Those little cows are fast,” he said. “And mean too.” He held up skinned knuckles.
“Maybe they have a little cow complex,” Conner joked. They both laughed.
Lisa came over and sat down a few minutes later. She was nothing like what he expected. He wasn't sure what it was he did expect, but it wasn't the pleasant, well spoken woman in front of him. Even knowing Katie's past he had still had certain misconceptions, he thought unhappily.
Aaron caught his eyes and shrugged as if to say, Who thought, Conner shrugged back. At least, he told himself, he was not alone in his misconceptions, but that wasn't really a comfort.
They ate their dinner of fresh beef and corn, washed down with coffee. The night air had a chill in it and Conner reminded himself that everyone would most likely need jackets and probably even heavy coats for the coming winter. As he got up to exchange post duty to let Josh come and eat, he noticed that somehow during dinner Debbie had apparently noticed that Chloe was interested in more than talk. It looked to Conner like maybe Debbie was discovering her own interests, or at least reexamining what she believed her own interests were.
The way Chloe looked at Debbie reminded him of the way he found himself sometimes looking a Katie. The way he had seen Molly look at Nellie. All the happiness in the world, yet you felt you could burst into tears in a moment. Your heart just couldn't contain it.
It made him sad immediately. He would be missing Molly and Nellie for a long time. They had become part of him, his world, just that fast. And now more, just a few hours before, he reminded himself, and he had not even gotten to know them yet. His sadness went deeper, but his eyes rose to Chloe once more and the cautious happiness he saw there made him smile despite the day and all they had been through. He hoped Chloe found that happiness, and he allowed those thoughts to remain. She had been through so much that happiness was something he felt she deserved. He was only glad to see that it had not killed the love inside of her.
The Nation
“Littlejohn. I knew some Littlejohns when I was a kid,” James said. “Mohawk Nation?”
“My Grandmother on my Mother's side. My dad was African American. I have his skin on her features. I never really got too far into any of the culture on either side though... I guess I considered myself no race, really,” Craig said. “Either way, James, it's good to meet you and I like what you have here.”
They had been back for about two hours. It was heading toward evening and they were up on the ledge watching the sunset. The smell of cooking food came to them, venison, Jake had shot a small deer on the way back, the seafood they had bought back, and fresh corn roasting in the husk would make a fast pick up meal.
“You lost two,” Jake said. “I was sorry to hear that.”
Craig nodded. “I knew Sissy was gone. I just didn't want to face it. John surprised me....” He met Jake's eyes. “I'll tell you though, we're all of us lucky to be here at all,” Craig said.
“From what you said I would have to agree,” Sharon said.
“I had no idea there were those kinds of crazies running around,” Craig said. “I guess that sounds crazy... I mean I knew there are crazies, did someone say death and taxes are the only two things you can count on? Well, no more, crazy is now right up there, but I didn't know how deep it goes. Didn't expect what happened.”
“Oh yeah,” Arlene agreed. “Them and many more... But there's none of that here... We've had about close to fifty parties come in... Like you, maybe not as dramatic or as hard a road to get here. A lot call and talk to us. Come in that way... Right here it's good, Craig. You couldn't do any better,” she told him.
“I can see that... It's funny, ironic, but we came looking for something like this... The whole thing started that way... If you're offering a place to stay,” he paused.
“I can't speak for everyone. We don't do things that way here,” Arlene said. “We have a committee. We talk it over, but if you want to stay I'm sure you can,” she finished.
“That's the way of it, Craig,” Jake said.
“Yeah. We all met on the way out of the north,” Amy said. “We didn't know each other at all. We grew as we came along. If not for that what you see wouldn't be here. Most of us either. I don't know where we would be,” she finished.
“There are more on the way in,” Annie said. “And more of ours who are out in the world who will be back in a few weeks... We hope.”
<
br /> “We've been through a lot together,” David said. “But we have a way to go too. We need other people. There is always room for more.”
“What about Roberta and Bonny. Do you think they'll want to stay,” Lilly asked. She was sitting next to Jake.
“Like me, this is exactly what they signed up for. We just signed up with the wrong man... Or the group was wrong... I don't know. I think Carl had the right idea... I don't know why it went the way it did.”
“I think it did because this is not a thing you do lightly,” James said. “People think they can survive anything... Well, most people do, but the reality is much different...” James paused, seemed to gather his thoughts.
“Some people fell apart right away. They couldn't deal with it. Too radical. Too much change, too fast, but most people bounced back and were sure they could do it. The problem is, all the things you take for granted are gone. No grocery stores. Gas stations. Cash, money, none of it is any good. I suppose the barter system we've seen spring up will be useful eventually, but if you have nothing it's hard to get something. If you don't know how to get fresh meat, hunt, recognize edible plants... Stay warm... It's a lot. It's not a simple thing... I think your man had the right idea he just didn't have the information he needed. Or, he may have had that too. From what I understand he had some knowledge about this area, but maybe it was simple bad luck. And bad luck in this world is very bad. There is no one to help... To call,” James shrugged.
Craig nodded. “I think that is it exactly. He believed it. He sold us on it. We believed... But things are so bad out there that we would have jumped at just about anything,” he shrugged. “At least I would have.”
“What is it you used to do, Craig,” Cindy asked. She had come back out on the ledge just a few moments before.
“Marines... Communications,” Craig said. “Phones. Radio networks, I mainly hustled equipment from one spot to the next on special details. There were four men on my team. We could each walk forty miles with a ninety pound pack on our back. Seems like we did it all the time. Started in basic and we thought they were just pushing us to show us what someday might have to happen... Like a one time thing, but it became the norm. We'd hump it out to where it needed to be, setting up relays along the way. Did it for a few years,” he met her eyes.
Earth's Survivors: box set Page 95