by Laura Pavlov
“Well, she sure as hell didn’t show me the same respect.” His fist collided with the table, and I jumped in my chair.
“Respect? You had an affair with her and then told her to abort the baby. I don’t think she felt like she owed you anything,” I shouted and pushed to my feet now, because he wasn’t reacting the way I wanted him to. He wasn’t devastated that he’d missed twenty years of his daughter’s life. He wanted to blame someone else, just like he always did.
“Don’t you dare take that tone with me. Guess what? Life’s not always perfect, Maura. You’ve grown up with a silver spoon in your mouth and you’ve never wanted for anything. And you have me to thank for that. So, you owe me. This conversation stays between us. You will not share this with your mama. And you most definitely won’t see this girl again.” He was standing now, crowding my space. Looming over me. Making every attempt to intimidate me.
And it was working.
My legs were shaking.
My hands were shaking.
My bottom lip quivered.
“Dad, you have a daughter.” Tears streamed down my face. “I guess I should consider myself lucky that you were okay with keeping me.”
I was shouting now which was not acceptable in our household, but I didn’t care. What appeared to be a perfect house on the outside was filled with secrets and lies.
“Listen to me. Sometimes life is messy, darlin’. It’s part of growing up. This is family business, and it needs to stay between us. I will have an investigator do some digging into this girl and make sure this isn’t all a scam to get money out of me.”
I shook my head. “It’s not always about money, Dad.”
I ran toward the front door before he could answer. I needed to think. I wanted away from here. Away from him.
My father’s coldness devastated me. There was something missing there. Empathy? Genuine compassion? I’d seen it before many times over the years, but never to this magnitude.
“Are you okay?” Alice whispered as she gripped both of my arms in the foyer. “Sweetheart, what happened?”
“He’s awful. I need to get out of here.”
She didn’t disagree. She wrapped her arms around me and hugged me tight. I ran out the door and straight for the barn. We had several horses, as riding had always been my escape. The place I cleared my head. I wanted to call Wes and Lyle, but I wasn’t ready to speak to my brothers about it. I wanted to call the girls, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t admit to anyone that my father didn’t care that he had a child. He didn’t show any guilt about having an affair all those years ago. Probably because it wasn’t his first nor his last affair.
Maybe he had multiple children that I didn’t know about.
I opened the stall and Jasmine walked right out. I’d been riding this horse since I was a little girl. I jumped on and took off right out of the barn. I saw my father standing there as I rode past him. He didn’t speak or try to stop me. He’d followed me out, probably hoping to convince me to stay silent. Allow him to keep this secret from my mother. To turn my back on Piper. Bile rose in my throat as Jasmine moved faster. I leaned forward, struggling to see through my teary gaze.
And I just kept riding.
I never wanted to go back.
Chapter Ten
Crew
I’d been out riding Harley for a few hours, and I took her right to the edge of the property. There was a sign on the wooden fencing letting trespassers know they’d be arrested.
Asshole.
We had a shit ton of land, as did the Bensons. Our lots backed up to one another, yet we had no signs on our property. Sometimes we’d get hikers or people on horseback who’d veered off the trail. When you have more land than God, you don’t need to be greedy. My father had never believed in threatening others. Our land often provided a shortcut to town, and there was no harm in allowing people to take the quicker path.
The sound of sobbing had me turning my head and hopping off of Harley. Sniffles and gasps were a bit muffled by the wind, so I stood on the fence and used my hand to shield the sun from my eyes. About fifty feet away, I saw a gorgeous brown Arabian horse standing beside the old oak tree.
“Benson?” I shouted when I saw a girl slumped against the tree. Her head shot up and she swiped at her cheeks.
“Hey.”
“Hey? What the hell are you doing out here?” I asked, and the look on her face made my chest squeeze. It was worse than when I’d found her in the bathroom yesterday. The conversation obviously hadn’t gone well.
“I just needed to get away.” She pushed to her feet and started walking toward me, holding the reins of her horse as she guided her to follow.
“Yeah? You want to talk about it?”
“There’s not much to say,” she croaked. “My father is exactly who you thought he was. I think you just might be right about the Bensons.”
I opened the door to the gate, and she walked through. I certainly wasn’t stepping on the wrong side, as Arthur Benson would not have a problem shooting me in cold blood. She’d need to come this way. Before I could stop myself, I pulled her into my arms and held her close against my chest and she cried. I didn’t miss the devastation as her body quaked against mine. I’d never let myself fall apart, but I felt the hurt. I recognized the pain. And I wanted to take it away.
“What happened?” Her lavender scent surrounded me, and I didn’t realize how much I’d missed it. I’d seen her yesterday, yet I’d missed her this morning. Alarm bells were going off and I didn’t care. I didn’t give a fuck. I just wanted to make her feel better. To comfort her.
“He’s everything you thought he was. I’m just the last to know.” Her words were hardly audible over her sobs.
I’d hated Arthur Benson for as long as I could remember, but right now, I wished I didn’t. I wished I could tell her that her father wasn’t a bad man. I wished I could fix things for her. And that scared the shit out of me. Because Maura Benson was not someone I should be comforting. She wasn’t someone I should be fantasizing about every goddamn day in the shower. I hadn’t gotten together with Juliette even though she’d continued texting me. I continued to make up excuses why I couldn’t see her. Brynn had reached out too, and I’d ghosted her. Because I couldn’t see straight when I was around Maura. She was all I thought about.
“I’m sure he has some redeeming qualities. I mean, he has you,” I said, trying to think of anything I could say to make her feel better.
Arthur fucking Benson had one redeeming quality from what I could see. He had an amazing daughter. His sons were nice as well, but we’d always avoided one another. I’m sure he’d threatened them to make sure they stayed away. The man was toxic.
“Why are you being so nice to me? You hate me, remember?” she said, and she pulled back to look up at me.
“I don’t hate you. But I sure have tried.” I laughed, and a small smile spread across her pretty face. “God, you’re so damn pretty.”
She laughed now. A full-bodied, vibrant laugh. Her head fell back, and even with all those tears streaming down her face, she managed to embrace the moment.
“Crew Carlisle, did you just give me a compliment? What’s happening here?”
“I may have. I mean, you’re still a Benson. But that doesn’t mean I don’t think you’re beautiful.” I smirked and her face fell.
“I am a Benson.”
“Because you’re upset, I’m going to tell you a little secret. I think it will cheer you up.”
“I can’t wait to hear it,” she said, and she used her sleeve to swipe away the remaining moisture beneath her eyes.
“That day when you rear-ended me in your car.” I cleared my throat. “I was looking at you in my rearview mirror. I hadn’t seen you in a long time and just the sight of you—you took my breath away.”
Her gaze studied mine before a wide grin sp
read across her face. “I knew that because I was looking at you too.”
“Is that so?” I said, tucking her hair behind her ear.
“It is. But then I got out of the car, and you were such a jerk to me.”
“That’s because I was pissed that I’d caused an accident because I couldn’t look away from you. And then you got out of the car, and you were so apologetic and nice and pretty, and I was just completely…”
“Completely, what?”
“Charmed.” I ran my thumb across her cheek.
“Are you still charmed?” she said just above a whisper.
“I am. Very much so.”
“What does that even mean? Because now I understand why you hate my family. And I’m a part of that. I’m a part of my father. So, no sense letting anything happen here. It couldn’t go anywhere.” She took a step back, but I moved into her space and placed a hand on her cheek.
“I don’t give a fuck what your last name is. I know who you are.”
“And who am I? Hell, I don’t even know who I am. I just found out my dad is a monster. I’ve had blinders on where he’s concerned. I have a mother who I’m keeping a terrible secret from. And I have a sister who I’m not allowed to speak to. I wouldn’t want to get anywhere near me if I were you,” she said, her voice was strained as her gaze locked with mine.
“Well, it’s a good thing you aren’t me.”
“Why?” she whispered.
“Because you’re all I think about.” My fingers moved into her thick, silky hair, just like they’d been itching to do since the first day she strode into my office.
“Yeah? What do you think about?” She moved closer, pressing her chest against mine, and her warm breath tickled against my mouth. Her lips were so close, if I leaned forward just a little bit, I could get a taste. And I wanted her. More than I’d ever wanted anyone. I couldn’t think clearly when Maura was around.
She worked for me.
Her father was the man I despised most on this earth.
This could never work.
She was right, it couldn’t go anywhere.
But right now, I didn’t care.
“I think about tasting that sweet mouth of yours. I think about spending time with you outside of work. About your laugh and your smile. About the way your cheeks go pink every time you catch me looking at you.”
“I think about those things too, but that doesn’t mean we should act on it. It would just make everything messier than it already is,” she said, and then she covered her face. “I mean, about the kissing you part.”
I leaned closer, pulling her hands away from her face. My lips grazed hers. “Just because we shouldn’t doesn’t mean I don’t want to. Plus, I don’t mind messy at the moment. I’d take you messy any day.”
She brushed her lips back and forth against mine. My dick was raging behind my zipper. I wrapped an arm around her lower back and down to her perfectly round ass. I lifted her off the ground with one hand, just as our mouths collided.
I’d kissed a lot of women over the years, but never had a kiss been anything close to this one. Her hands were in my hair, and I tilted her face just enough so I could take the kiss deeper. My tongue dipped in, tasting and exploring as her tongue did a wild dance with mine.
Explosive perfection was the only way I could describe it.
The way she lit my body on fire. Wanting and needing in a way I didn’t even know existed.
She groaned into my mouth and rocked her hips against mine, and I nearly came undone right there. I felt like a teenage boy having sex for the first time. It was an irrational lust. An unexplainable need.
A desire so strong I couldn’t stop if I wanted to.
And I didn’t want to.
We’d deal with the aftermath later, because right now, this was where we both wanted to be.
Needed to be.
I dropped down to my knees, lying her gently on the ground in the field we were standing in. Our mouths never separating. Seared together like this was where we belonged. I propped myself above her and continued kissing her, as my hips rolled slowly where I knew she needed me most. Our clothes were creating friction, and she bucked her hips faster as I kissed her deeper.
“Please don’t stop. I want you,” she whispered.
I nipped at her bottom lip and my hand came down between us. I pulled back to see if it was okay and she nodded. I slowly unbuttoned her jeans and slipped my hand inside. The feel of her lace panties covered the back of my hand as I slipped beneath and found her most sensitive spot.
“Jesus. You’re so wet,” I said, looking down at her. “Let me make you feel good.”
“Just for tonight. Tomorrow we’ll go back to normal.”
Her words stung, but I knew she was right. There were a million reasons why this would never work. But only one thing mattered right now.
I wanted Maura Benson.
Enemies be damned.
I didn’t give a shit about her father. About the fact that she worked for me. I only cared about the beautiful woman sprawled out in the field beneath me.
She was all that mattered.
My mouth covered hers and she moved her hips against my hand. I slipped a finger in, and she gasped against my mouth. My erection was threatening to burst through the denim, but I didn’t care. All I cared about was pleasing this girl, and that’s damn well what I was going to do.
“Crew,” she cried out my name, and it sounded like a whisper as the wind whistled around us. She rode out every last wave of pleasure.
I pulled back to look at her. Her lips were plump and red from kissing me. Her eyes were closed. And her beautiful face was sated and content. I’d never seen a more beautiful woman in my life. I wanted to memorize every inch of her gorgeous face. Of her perfect body. The way her hair was splayed out around her. With tall grass surrounding her like some sort of halo, she was a vision.
“You okay?” I whispered as she lay there with her eyes closed.
“Oh, is this really happening? I wondered if it was just another dream. I’ve been having quite a few lately.” Her gorgeous honey brown eyes opened, and the sun coming down highlighted splashes of amber and gold.
“Did you just admit that you’ve been dreaming about me?” I smirked.
“Well, I don’t think I’m the only one. I mean, is that a banana in your pants or are you just happy to see me?” We both barked out a laugh. That was the thing with this girl. There was an unexplainable lightness with her. Even with our history, and all the reasons we should stay away from one another—we just fit. I’d never laughed with a woman the way I laughed with her.
“It’s most definitely not a banana. I’d say more like an oversized eggplant, if I’m being honest.”
She raised her hand and traced her fingers down my cheek. “You’re a beautiful man, Crew Carlisle.”
I leaned down and kissed her once more, before pushing back on my knees. I adjusted her sweater and buttoned her jeans before moving to sit forward.
She pushed up to sit beside me.
“So, that was interesting.”
“Very,” I said.
“Thanks for taking my mind off things. I just planned to come out here and hide out for a few hours until I figured out what to do.”
“Are you going back home?” I asked. I wanted to keep her right here for as long as I could. Because after we left this field, we both knew things would have to go back to normal.
“I don’t want to. But I didn’t exactly drive here, so I can’t really get in my car and make a dramatic exit,” she said, bumping her shoulder into me. “My mom’s out of town, and my father is always at the club on Saturday nights anyway.”
I wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer. “Have dinner with my family and then we’ll head back to Dallas after we eat tonight.”
&
nbsp; She turned to face me. “Your family hates me.”
“No. None of them hate you. That was just me. None of them care for your father, but they don’t hold anything against you or your brothers or your mother, for that matter.”
Her eyes welled with emotion again. “My mother. He insisted I don’t tell her. How do I keep something this big from her? He also told me that I am not to talk to Piper ever again.”
I pushed the hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ear. “He’s such an asshole. He doesn’t even want to meet Piper?”
“He doesn’t. And he doesn’t want my mother to find out. Oh my god, you aren’t going to tell your family about this, are you? Listen, Crew, I know you hate my dad. But please keep this between us. At least for right now. I don’t want my mama to learn about this through the town gossip.”
“I’m not going to tell anyone. No one in my family needs any more reason to dislike your father. Your secret is safe with me.” I kissed the top of her head.
“Tell me what he did, and I’ll come to dinner at your house,” she said, looking up at me. Her eyes searched mine.
“Listen, Benson, he’s your dad. It’s not my place to tell you awful things about him. I think he’s given you plenty of reason to question his moral compass,” I said, hoping it would appease her. I didn’t want to dig this up. I wasn’t in the best place at the moment, talking about Belle as much as we had last night.
Maura pushed away from me and moved to her feet. “All right then. I guess I have to go back and have dinner with my father at the club and pretend I don’t hate him right now. You’re summoning me to a night of misery because you’re a stubborn ass.” She stormed toward her horse.
I pushed to my feet now. “I’m a stubborn ass? You’re refusing to come to my house and have dinner unless I tell you more awful things about your father when you’re already out here crying about the asshole? I’m trying to spare your feelings.”
She whipped around, her chest slamming into mine. “I don’t want to be spared. I’m a grown-ass woman. Tell me what he did. What could be bad enough that you’ve had such a hatred for my entire family all these years? I mean, this can’t be about our grandfathers’ oil business, right?”