by Holly Hart
I lift my hand, surprised to find it trembling, and cup his cheek.
“I’d like to do that again,” he murmurs, his lips hovering a hair’s breadth from my own. Desire thickens his voice. “But if I do, I don’t think I’ll be able to stop.”
“I don’t want you to,” I whisper, my own voice heavy with the same desire.
66
Caitlin
His hands clutch my hips, his own moving between my thighs as he bends closer, his torso flattening against mine, pressing me more firmly against the counter. My fingers tangle in his hair as his mouth plunders mine.
It feels so right. Natural in a way I’ve never experienced before. Instead of the awkwardness, the nervousness that’s always made it impossible for me to move past this point with any of the men who’ve kissed me in the past, I finally feel free to release the death grip I’ve always maintained on my self-control and lose myself in the sensations he’s stoking with his expert touch and intoxicating mouth.
The sounds of pleasure coming from somewhere deep in his throat set fire to my blood as much as his taste. They chase away my doubts and the shyness I’ve always experienced in the past.
I explore his mouth, savoring the slight bite of the wine that clings to the warm flesh.
Jeremy straightens, moving off of me, not giving me a chance to adjust to the sudden loss of his warmth before his arms curl around me, pulling me off the counter. Carrying me as easily as he would Sasha, he moves with long, purposeful strides through his large apartment to his bedroom, where he sets me free.
He reaches up, cupping his big hand around my cheek. I lean into his touch, both needing it and craving more.
He stares at me, his expression half-smiling and half-quizzical. Something about it makes me wonder if he knows, if he somehow senses my inexperience even though I hadn’t – would never – tell him.
“Are you sure?” he whispers. “Is this what you want?”
Yes. No. I’m really not sure. Were it not for the wine singing through my veins, I probably would take this opportunity to bolt, just like I have every other time I’ve come this far.
But I’m tired of wondering. I’m tired of waiting. I’m tired of running. And the funny thing is, even though I’ve only known Jeremy for a little while, even though he’s about as far removed from the guys I’ve always dated as anything imaginable, I trust him more than I have ever trusted anyone. Just this one time, I want to lose myself in the heat of the moment, and Jeremy seems like the perfect person to lose myself with.
I trace his lips with the pad of my thumb, marveling at how soft they are. “I want you,” I whisper, delighting in how his eyes darken at my words. “I want this. I want it more than I’ve ever wanted anything else in my life.”
His fingers dig into my arms as he bows his head. The kiss is different than the ones before it. Deeper, pushing me closer to something hotter and more tantalizing than I’ve ever experienced before. My hands glide up his chest, exploring his well-developed muscles through his shirt before I loop my arms around his neck.
“What do you like?” he murmurs against my mouth, his breath fanning across my cheeks and ruffling my hair.
Uh oh, that’s not a good question. Since I won’t know what I like until I’ve experienced it, I opt for the safe answer. One that won’t make him stop touching me, kissing me.
I sweep my fingers back and forth against the soft skin on the back of his neck, delighting in how the simply action makes him shiver. “I like all the same things you do.”
Chuckling, he kisses my hair. “That simplifies things.”
His hands aren’t quite steady as he reaches for the bottom of my long-sleeved T-shirt, slowly drawing it upwards, revealing my flat stomach and the ridges created by my ribs one slow inch at a time, until he finally tugs the garment over my head and tosses it across the room.
He steps back a little, taking advantage of the light spilling into the bedroom to conduct a visual exploration.
The weight of his gaze makes me shiver. Had I had even an inkling that his offer of dinner would have ended this way, I’d have taken a little more time getting dressed, opted for the pretty peach Victoria’s Secret number I treated myself to last year instead of my faithful battered sports bra.
“Gorgeous,” Jeremy whispers, bowing his head and trailing a line of butterfly kisses along my collar bone, not stopping until his lips encounter my bra strap. “Simply stunning.”
I’m certain he’s lying—.this is a man with the money, looks, and personality to date any woman in the world – but I can’t bring myself to care. His words might not be true, but that doesn’t stop them from sending a searing bolt of confidence through me. They’re exactly what I need to hear right now.
Fingers trembling, I catch hold of the bottom of his sweatshirt and push it upwards until it slides over his head. I let it fall to the floor and swallow. His torso is more finely honed, more chiseled than any of the celebrities I’ve drooled over. He has the body of a Greek god and for tonight, it’s all mine.
Unable to resist, I drop a kiss to the middle of his sternum, relishing the faint taste of salt. “You’re not so bad yourself.”
My hands have a mind of their own. Before I even fully grasp what they’re doing, they’ve reached for his waistband and worked the button of his jeans free. Above my hands, his stomach muscles quiver. I wonder whether it’s the result of barely contained lust or anticipation. I don’t really care. The only thing I care about is that his body is having such a strong reaction to me. I never dreamt I could have such an impact on any man – let alone this one.
His hands come up, fisting in my hair, holding me still for a hard, quick kiss. “You’re fucking driving me crazy,” he breathes into my mouth. “Do you know that?”
“I’m starting to figure that out.” I grin against his lips. “And I like it.”
Moving with more confidence, more purpose, I lower his zipper and push his jeans down over his hips, letting them pool around his ankles. His cock strains against the front of his bright white briefs. The sight causes me to falter.
I’ve come this far, there’s no way I’m running now – but I don’t have the faintest idea what I should do next. And what if he finds out that I have zero experience past this point? Would it turn him on or – or – maybe appall him, and make him throw me out of his apartment? A brief hint of panic rises, and it takes a second before I’m able to bite it back down.
The mental image of being tossed out in my current state gives me the boost I need, and I reach for his briefs. Before my fingertips brush against the white cotton, his hands slide down my arms until his fingers bracket around my wrists, holding them in place.
Heart pounding, I lift my head, my gaze capturing his. His eyes burn with passion. His breathing is ragged. Sweat beads on his pectoral muscles. “Jeremy?” My voice shakes. “Did I do something wrong?”
He shakes his head and draws in one deep breath, followed by another. “No, I just need a second.” He releases my hands and reaches for my waistband. “I seem to be running behind.”
Startled by the feel of his hands, I draw in a deep breath and suck in my stomach. I wait for the bright flash of panic, but for the first time it doesn’t come. For the first time in my life, I’m willing to relax. To trust.
My pants slide down my legs, followed almost instantaneously by my panties. Jeremy’s big body presses against mine, urging me backwards toward the bed while his hands slowly roll my bra upward, freeing my aching breasts.
And his lips. God. They never rest. The man’s mouth is all over me, and each place his lips and tongue touch burns, the blood pounding painfully just below the skin.
I strain against him, even as he urges me backwards onto the mattress, begging for more of his attention.
“Easy, Caitlin,” he murmurs. The mattress crumples beneath our combined weights. The silk bedspread is cool, soothing, against my overheated skin.
He spreads his body across mine and all
my muscles turn to water. I never would have thought the simple feel of flesh against flesh could feel so good, so natural. Wanting more and not knowing quite how to get it, I run my hands up and down his back, scraping my nails lightly against his skin as I squirm beneath him.
Laughing against my mouth, he works a hand between us, cupping my most intimate spot, the touch causing the flame that started burning within me when he kissed me in the kitchen to erupt into an inferno.
“Jeremy,” I gasp his name against his lips as my nails bite into his rock-hard muscles and my body arches and bucks beneath his.
Needing air, I break the kiss, inhaling deeply before I begin peppering his jaw with kisses, occasionally nipping, only to soothe the tormented skin with the tip of my tongue.
“Caitlin,” he groans before lowering his head to my breasts. His fingers rub the side swell, massaging deeply as his tongue flicks across my nipple, lavishing attention on it until it’s diamond hard before moving to its twin and repeating the process. Through it all, his hand never moves. Not to explore and not to ease up on the incredible pressure.
The more attention he lays upon my chest, the more aware I become of his hands between my thighs. I squirm against it, loving the pressure even as I wish he’d back off.
The hand he was using to hold my breasts in place for his mouth moves, sliding up and over my chest, gliding along the line of my throat, and catching me about the chin. He taps his index finger against my cheekbone until I finally meet his eyes.
“Do you want me to stop?”
67
Jeremy
Asking her if she wants me to stop is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I’m more turned on now than I’ve ever been before in my life. If she tells me to stop, I’ll move heaven and hell to do so, but there’s no doubt in my mind that doing so would leave me a broken man.
I don’t know what it is about Caitlin, but I’ve never wanted … no needed, a woman as badly as I need her.
I run my hands up and down her sides, delighting in the way this simple touch makes her shiver and sigh. Intrigued by her little sounds of pleasure, I fit my mouth to hers, loving how the tip of her tongue brushes against mine as they dance together. With each stroke of her tongue, a fresh wave of blood rushes to my cock, making it jump and twitch as it swells to a seemingly impossible size. I can’t remember a single time when I’ve ever been so hard, so turned on in my entire life.
She squirms beneath me, moisture saturating the hand I’ve planted against her core, reminding me of all the things I’ve yet to do to her. Of the peaks of pleasure I’m going to carry her to – and then toss her off of, into a burning core of desire.
“Caitlin,” I repeat. “Open your eyes.” I want to look deep into her beautiful green eyes, to see everything she feels as I claim her as my own. I need to know that she’s right here with me, that this is affecting her just as deeply as it is me.
She’s slow to respond to my request, but finally her lashes flutter. That’s all I need.
“Do you want me to stop?” Uttering those words is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Every iota of my body wants to sink into her, to make her mine, body and soul. But I need her to understand that we’re pushing against the point of no return.
She doesn’t respond, just stares up at me with desire glazed eyes. I shift closer, until my breath washes over her hair. I caress her cheek before capturing her chin between my fingers.
“If we go any further,” I warn, desire thickening my voice, “there’s no turning back. I won’t stop. I won’t be able to.”
Caitlin’s nails dig into my back as she licks her lips and squirms beneath me. Blood roars in my ears and my elbows shake with the effort needed to restrain myself from taking her before she says the words I desperately need to hear.
“No.”
“No what?” I groan. “Caitlin, I need to hear you say the words. No, you don’t want to keep going, or no, you don’t want me to stop.”
She curls her torso into mine. I curl my upper body, lifting herself far enough to press my lips against his. “Please. Whatever you do. Don’t stop.”
That’s all I need.
I move my thumb, letting it glide back and forth across her clit while I cover her mouth, swallowing her shocked gasp.
I pull free of her mouth and kiss my way down the side of her neck, my thumb stroking her the entire time. I keep the kisses coming, thrilling in the taste of salt on her skin as I make my way to the tip of her breasts and take one straining nipple between my teeth.
I suck at the sweet treat while I slide one finger into her moist heat.
Her hips buck so hard she nearly sends me flying. Her inner muscles clamp down on my finger. If she’s this tight against my finger … My eyes practically cross at the thought of how she’ll feel surrounding my cock.
That reminds me… As wonderful as this is, if I keep playing with her like this for much longer, my poor cock won’t get the chance to find out what she feels like because I simply won’t last that long.
Caitlin’s nails dig into my back once more, scoring my flesh, leaving deep indentations that I know I’ll still feel tomorrow.
“Please,” she moans. She’s so completely wrapped up in what my finger and mouth are doing, I wonder if she knows what she’s begging for – or if she even realizes that she’s begging.
“I want you, Caitlin,” I whisper into her breast, unsure if she can hear me. “I want all of you, body, soul, and heart.”
The words shoot through me. Startling me. I’ve never said such a thing to a woman before. Not even anything close. Now, I’ve not only said them, but I realize I mean them. I don’t know what it is about Caitlin, what makes her different from every other woman I’ve ever been with, but already she’s changing my life.
There’s something about her I desperately need. And I suspect that after tonight, that need will be even stronger. Unquenchable.
The realization should scare me to death, but it doesn’t. It makes me feel … complete. Like I’ve found something I didn’t even know I was looking for.
Beneath me, Caitlin moves. Her body undulates as she wraps one long leg around my hips. My hand slips from her, cupping her hip as I shift my position. The tip of my cock probes her sweet entrance and I start to sink into her, only to stop. It’s not enough.
“Caitlin.” I barely recognize my voice, it’s so thick with lust and emotion.
Instead of answering me with words, Caitlin’s heel digs into my ass, urging me to sink more deeply into her.
Groaning with pleasure, I sink hilt deep into her. It’s pure heaven. Her heat surrounds my cock, until I’m afraid I’ll go up in flames.
Caitlin’s moans sound almost as good as her body feels around my cock. Pinning her gaze with my own, I slowly start to move. To rock into her. To thrust.
It takes Caitlin a second to catch up, to arch her back up off the mattress and to rock her pelvis against mine. The movement sends shockwaves of blinding pleasure rioting through my body. My eyes cross and my arms shake.
I’ve never experienced anything so intense.
It both exhilarates and terrifies me.
Caitlin’s inner heat grows more intense with each stroke. Beneath me, her body bucks and quakes. Lightning flashes in her beautiful eyes, telling me she’s as close to her release as I am to mine. Determined to experience this together, I pull her close until our bodies practically defy the laws of physics and share the same space.
That’s all it takes. Caitlin explodes around me, clamping down on my cock as her body bucks and thrashes and her shout fills the air. And I’m right there with her, emptying myself into her in a climax that’s more intense, more brilliant than anything I’ve ever experienced before.
Spent, I collapse against her. We lie in a tangled pile of bare limbs and trembling flesh as we ride out the aftershocks that rocket through each of us.
68
Jeremy
I bury my face in the crook of Caitlin’s neck, clo
se my eyes, and inhale her fresh, clean scent. I’m perfectly happy to spend the rest of my life right here, like this. I don’t remember a time when I’ve ever felt more at peace, when I’ve felt like I was right where I belong. I suspect that eventually this will bother me, but right now I’m too content to worry about it.
Beneath me, Caitlin shivers, the movement somewhat different from the uncontrollable quaking that rocked her body in the aftermath of her orgasm.
I kiss the side of her neck. “Cold?”
Now that the blood is slowly returning to my brain, I’m becoming aware that the combination of the slightly cool temperature within my apartment and the drying sweat feels chilly.
“A little,” Caitlin admits.
I roll off of her, silently mourning the loss of her inner warmth as my cock slides free of her body.
I shift both of us around and grapple with the bedding until both of us are enveloped under the warm blankets.
Sighing with contentment, Caitlin turns to me, resting her head on my shoulder, her warm breath fanning across my chest. I gently stroke her soft, bright red hair as a few questions dance through my mind. I try to ignore them, but it proves an impossible task.
“Caitlin?”
“Mmm,” she responds sleepily.
I search for the right words, ones that won’t make either of us uncomfortable, but none are forthcoming. I’m going to have to blunder my way through this and hope for the best.
“Have you …” I take a deep breath and force myself to finish speaking the thought out loud. “Have you ever done this before?”
She stiffens. I wrap my free arm around her shoulders, holding her in place when she tries pulling away.
“Did I do something wrong?”
The hesitation and uncertainty in her voice breaks my heart. I kiss the top of her head.