Alarm Call

by Jardine, Quintin

  ‘Are you sure she was telling you that?’

  ‘There you go again.’

  He had a fair point about the mobile number, I suppose, but my suspicions were roused. Experience had taught me that with my ex-wife that was always the safest way to proceed. She had turned up, pumped my dad for information, and given nothing away except a phone number that she must have known would be mentioned to me. But she hadn’t been as smart as she’d thought. She’d told me that whatever she was doing now, it wasn’t nursing.

  When she’d got into the habit of wearing her hair short, it was to make it fit easily and quickly under her cap, for she hated pinning it up on top of her head. The makeup style had come from the same era, and for similar reasons. When Susie and I are going out on the razzle, it takes her half an hour to do her face ... not that she needs it. Primavera did the same job in five minutes.

  I know my dad hadn’t meant to unsettle me, but he had all the same. Long after I had dropped him off back in Anstruther, said, ‘Hello and cheerio,’ to my stepmother, and set off on the road back to the west, I was still thinking about Primavera Phillips Blackstone.

  Chapter 4

  The kids were in bed when I got home, although Janet was still awake, waiting for Daddy to read her a story, as I tried to do every night when I wasn’t away on a project. We were well into The Hobbit, at the part where Gandalf, Bilbo and the dwarfs had escaped from the goblins and found Beorn the skin-changer. My daughter loved it. A bit advanced for a three-and-three-quarter-year-old? Maybe, but I had started her on The House at Pooh Corner, only to have to abandon it because I couldn’t read much of it before cracking up with laughter. Whatever: for a bright kid, a story’s a story.

  We moved further down the road that goes on for ever, until her eyes grew heavy, and she showed the first signs of nodding off. (It’s the way you tell them, Oz.) I kissed her goodnight, changed my shirt, and went down to the drawing room, where Susie was waiting, dressed for dinner. (It’s not a house rule: it’s just something she likes to do, and I go along with it.)

  She handed me a glass of something white and slightly acidic. (No, not Anne Robinson: it was Gran Vina Sol, I think.) ‘How is he, then?’ she asked.

  I played the game. ‘Who?’

  ‘Mac, who else?’

  ‘Maybe I’ve got a mistress.’

  ‘In that case, after last night you’ve got more stamina than I gave you credit for. But I don’t think that even you would be crass enough to take my car when you visit her. You left your mobile, and you didn’t say where you were going, but you took your clubs. They’re your tools for mending fences.’

  ‘I’d better never try to fool you,’ I told her. ‘Yes, I went to see my dad.’

  ‘How did it go?’

  ‘Fine. We’re pals again.’

  ‘Did he tell you why he wasn’t speaking to you?’

  Christ! She’d got it completely wrong. That was a first for Susie . . . well, maybe not, if you count Mike Dylan, but he’d fooled everyone, so I’ll let her off with that one. I chose not to correct her. ‘We didn’t talk about the past.’

  ‘So what did you?’

  ‘The excellent shape of his golf game at first, then families and people.’

  ‘Let me guess, you took Ellen’s new boyfriend apart between you.’

  ‘Shrewd as ever, my darling. My dad thinks he’s a wanker too.’

  She grinned, mischievously. ‘Then you’re both off the mark, according to what Ellie told me last time we had a girlie talk. Seriously, though, I’d advise you both to try to like him, because she does.’

  ‘You’d better include Jonny in that warning too.’

  ‘Jonny liked Darius: any new boyfriend was going to find him a tough nut to crack.’

  ‘I like Darius too, but I never thought for a minute that he would last. Ellie needs attention, not just an occasional shag when the pair of them can fit it in. That’s why her marriage broke up: it died because of her isolation and boredom. That’s the thing that worries me most about this guy: when I met him he struck me as self-obsessed. ’

  ‘Your whole bloody profession’s self-obsessed, Oz, my love.’

  ‘Not completely. I, for one, find time to be completely obsessed by my wife and children.’

  ‘You’ve learned from past mistakes, have you?’

  I whistled. ‘Ouch! Which mistakes are you talking about?’

  ‘I meant your second try at marriage.’

  ‘I hope so. Speaking of which, or whom, whatever it should be, my dad had a visit from Primavera.’

  I could see her bridle. ‘Did he now? What did she want?’

  ‘Nothing, he said. It was purely a just-passing, drop-in, “How’re you doing?” sort of thing, or so she assured him.’

  ‘But you’re not assured?’

  ‘Not for a second. Prim doesn’t do casual.’

  Susie snorted. ‘Neither do you: everything has to have a purpose, like this morning, for an example. When you swanned off, I knew you were up to something.’

  ‘But you let me go without a word?’

  ‘Sure, because I knew you’d come back and tell me. So, did she ask Mac about you?’

  ‘Apparently not. She probably subscribes to Empire, the movie magazine. But she wants to talk to me, though.’

  ‘Did she tell him that?’

  ‘Not directly.’ I described the way that Prim had let him know that she still had the same mobile number. ‘Like I said, that wasn’t innocent. There was a purpose to it.’

  ‘Maybe she fancies him.’

  I frowned at her as she topped up my glass. ‘Don’t say that, even in jest.’

  ‘Hey, don’t get so serious,’ she exclaimed. ‘Call her.’

  ‘You’re joking again.’

  ‘No, I am not. If you’re right and she really does want to contact you, she’ll work out a way, or eventually she’ll pluck up the courage to come here. I don’t fancy that, so I’d rather you just phoned her and got it over with.’

  ‘That’s pretty magnanimous of you.’

  ‘Like hell it is. I don’t want anything to do with the woman, and I don’t like the idea of ex-daughters-in-law calling on my father-in-law. But I don’t want her hanging over us like a black cloud, so bloody well call her, and if you have to, bloody well see her.’

  ‘That’s pretty generous, then, or is it brave?’

  ‘Brave?’ she said, almost incredulously. ‘Why should courage come into it? My love, do you think I’ve achieved what I have in business without being just a wee bit self-confident? I’m sure of myself and I’m sure of you. I can see off Prim any day of the week.’

  She could too. ‘All right, I’ll give her a ring, but not tonight.’

  She winked at me. ‘You’ve still got her number, then?’

  ‘Good question. I don’t think I do. I’ll get it from my dad.’

  ‘No need. I’ll have it in the database on my computer. I never throw away anything like that.’

  We moved through to the dining room: Susie had cooked an all-in-one meal in our three-tier steamer and the housekeeper had left us a salad starter. She and Willie the gardener are the only members of our small staff who don’t live in. Ethel, the nanny, has a suite in the big house, while Audrey and Conrad have the gatehouse.

  We ate without much conversation; when Susie cooks she likes her efforts to be appreciated. We had reached the cheeseboard when we heard wee Jonathan bawling upstairs. I went to check on him, but by the time I got to the nursery, Ethel had things in hand, rubbing Bonjela gently on to his angry gums.

  When I went back to the table there was a piece of paper beside my cheese plate with a mobile number written on it in my wife’s clear hand. ‘There you are,’ she said.

  ‘Tomorrow,’ I told her.

  ‘You’ll be busy: you have a few other calls to make. You’ve been in demand today.’

  ‘By whom?’

  ‘A man from a television company rang about something he’d like you to be i
n.’

  ‘No detail?’

  ‘No, and at that point I didn’t have time to interrogate him, because your friend Mr Potter came up on the other line . . . Remember? The accountant at the airport? He said if you still want his firm to pitch for the business you mentioned, he’d like a brief so he can put a proposal together.’

  ‘We’ll put something together tomorrow.’

  ‘We?’

  ‘Sure, your financial situation’s interlinked with mine. This is a joint venture and we don’t do anything you’re not happy with.’

  Susie grinned. ‘I’m glad you said that: you saved me the trouble. After him,’ she continued, ‘Roscoe rang: he’s talked to people since he got back to LA. Everything’s fine and all the numbers are agreed.’

  ‘Great. It makes Potter’s pitch all the more important. I’ll talk to him face to face tomorrow, over an Internet link. Was that all?’

  ‘Hell, no! Your future brother-in-law called.’

  ‘Harvey January?’

  She nodded.

  ‘He didn’t call himself that, did he?’

  ‘No, that was just me winding you up. He said that he’s appearing in the High Court in Glasgow next week, and he wants to invite you to lunch.’

  ‘What did you tell him?’

  ‘I told him Rogano, on Tuesday, upstairs, and you’re paying.’

  ‘You what?’

  ‘You heard.’

  ‘I’m sure I’m doing something else on Tuesday.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘Anything. I’ll think of something.’

  ‘You have to get to know the man, Oz. He’s not going to go away.’

  ‘Maybe I could persuade him.’

  ‘Don’t even try. This man’s a lawyer: you can’t intimidate him.’

  ‘I suppose you’ve booked a table too.’

  ‘Twelve thirty, in your name.’

  ‘Bitch from hell!’

  She smiled sweetly. ‘When I have to be.’

  ‘Fine. I’m going to call Ellie, though, to see if she knows about this.’

  ‘Don’t you dare!’

  ‘Why not? You scared she’ll savage him if she doesn’t?’

  ‘Maybe. I know you and your sister: you’re a bloody coven, the pair of you.’

  I beamed back at her. ‘No. She’s the witch: I’m a mere imp.’

  ‘Don’t sell yourself short. You’ll meet him, though?’

  ‘Okay, if you’re asking nicely.’

  ‘I am, really.’

  ‘Fine. Want to watch some telly?’

  ‘If you can find anything worth watching, okay.’ She paused. ‘Oh, shit, I nearly forgot. There was one other thing. You had a call from Everett Davis.’

  That was another one I hadn’t been expecting, but it was welcome nonetheless. Everett, also known as Daze, is the president of the Global Wrestling Alliance, which he founded and built, from its original European base in Glasgow, into one of the world’s top sports entertainment companies. He’s a great friend, and I owe him a lot, because he, along with Miles Grayson, was responsible for getting me into the movie business.

  ‘That’s magic,’ I said. ‘Is he in town?’

  ‘No, he’s in the US, but he didn’t tell me which part. All he said was that he’s upset with you, and he wants to talk to you about it.’

  I felt a cold shiver run through me. Everett Davis is seven feet two inches tall and is, when he wants to be, just about the most dangerous man on the planet.

  And he was upset: with me.

  Chapter 5

  I shouldn’t have slept on it: I should have called him there and then. But I didn’t. Instead, I spent a good part of the night tossing and turning and wondering what the hell I had done to rattle the big man’s enormous cage. Hard as I tried, I couldn’t come up with any answers.

  The last time I’d seen him had been in London during the studio work on the third Skinner movie. He’d called to say that his wrestling circus was in town, and he, Liam Matthews, Jerry ‘The Behemoth’ Gradi and I all had dinner in Passione, a seriously good restaurant off Euston Road. He’d been in good form that night: his business was booming and his stock-market listing was making him (and me too) even richer by the day. I hadn’t heard from him since.

  I couldn’t call him next morning either. As Susie had said, all he’d told her was that he was in the States, without naming one of the fifty. That meant a time difference of between five and nine hours . . . more if he happened to be in Hawaii . . . and I didn’t fancy making him even grumpier by waking him in the middle of the night.

  So instead, after my morning work-out, swim and breakfast, and after I’d spent some time playing with Janet in her tree-house for gardens without trees, I sat down behind my desk and called Primavera’s mobile number. It took her a while to answer; when she did, she sounded as if she’d just woken up.

  ‘Yes,’ she grumbled.

  ‘Where the hell are you?’ I asked her.

  ‘Oz? Is that you?’

  ‘No, this is an Internet service which wakes people using the voices of famous movie stars. Your meter is running, and you have three minutes and seventeen seconds left.’

  ‘You’re crazy. What do you want?’

  ‘Why did you go to see my old man?’

  ‘I was in Anstruther. I decided that I couldn’t possibly leave without calling in on him, so I did.’

  ‘Are the Enster fish suppers really so good that you drove all the way from Perthshire for one?’

  ‘Don’t be daft.’

  ‘Are you having problems with your teeth?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘What other reason did you have to be in my home town, other than to call in on my father?’

  ‘I told him. I was bored, so I got into Dad’s car and went for a run.’

  ‘Shite. When you get bored you go out and pick up a guy. I’ll credit you with not trying to pull him, so what was it about?’

  She sighed. ‘Okay, I admit it. I wanted to get in touch with you, or rather, I wanted you to get in touch with me. But you knew that all along, didn’t you?’

  ‘Of course I did, but you can thank Susie for my taking the bait.’ I glanced at my wife across the huge desk.

  ‘Susie?’

  ‘She insisted that I call you, otherwise, girlie, you’d still be sound asleep. Look, why the charade? Why didn’t you just ring me?’

  ‘I don’t have your number any more.’

  ‘You’ve got my mobile number. I never changed it.’

  ‘I thought you’d have been bound to by now. But even if I’d known that, I wouldn’t have done it. I’d have expected you to hang up on me.’

  ‘Do you think I hate you? Last time we saw each other, going on for four years ago, did we or did we not part as friends?’

  ‘I suppose we did, although you thumping my boyfriend wasn’t very friendly.’

  ‘I didn’t thump him!’ I protested. ‘Miles did.’

  ‘He beat you to the punch, that was all. He didn’t want you breaking your hand on poor Nicky’s head and ruining his precious filming schedule.’

  ‘Poor Nicky, is it? He’s not still around, is he?’

  ‘No, not since just after Miles thumped him.’

  ‘So who is?’

  ‘Nobody at the moment.’ Her voice seemed to change as she said it.

  ‘But there was?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Did you get hurt again?’

  ‘Worse than that: oh, my dear Oz, much worse than just plain hurt.’

  I had known Primavera happy, sad, angry, triumphant, hurt, indignant, sober and on occasion drunk. We had shared some very traumatic times, and a few pretty decent moments too. But in the seven or eight years since we had first met, I had never heard such desolation in her voice.

  ‘When did all this happen?’

  ‘It’s a long story.’

  ‘Prim, why the hell didn’t you just call me and tell me you were in trouble?’

  ‘Because i
t’s got nothing to do with you! And because I feel so stupid and betrayed, and damned ashamed.’

  ‘So you staged that charade with my dad to smoke me out?’

  ‘Yes, I suppose, although I wasn’t thinking very clearly at the time. Not that I am now.’

  ‘Where are you?’ I asked her.

  ‘At home.’

  ‘Auchterarder? Are you still at your parents’ place?’

  ‘No, my home. I have a riverside flat in London.’

  ‘Are you alone?’

  ‘Am I ever.’

  I looked at Susie. I raised my eyebrows, that was all, but she understood, and she nodded.

  ‘I’ll book you a flight to Glasgow, this afternoon. Pack some kit, and I’ll call you back and give you the time.’

  ‘I can’t.’ She sighed.

  ‘Why not?’

  ‘What would Susie say?’

  ‘Susie’s here and she says it’s okay.’

  ‘I’m hung over, Oz.’

  ‘Take a couple of paracetamol tablets and drink plenty of orange juice: that always used to work for you. Go on, get your arse out of bed and get ready. What name are you using these days?’

  ‘It still says Mrs Blackstone on my passport: I got a new one as soon as we got married, remember.’

  ‘Sure. You were an optimist back then.’

  She hadn’t actually answered my question, but I let that pass. I hung up on her, then looked at Susie. ‘Are you all right with that?’ I asked her. She and Prim have a back story as well.

  ‘If you think it’s necessary.’

  ‘I do. I’ve never heard her like that before. She’s been hurt in some way and she can’t handle it, hence the gauche cry for help.’

  ‘But why cry to you? What about her sister and brother-in-law, Dawn and Miles?’

  ‘Dunno.’ I told Audrey, who was sitting at her desk, near ours, to book Prim’s flight. Then I glanced at my watch; it was just short of ten. I knew that the Graysons were in Sydney. I did a quick calculation and worked out that it would be evening there. I retrieved Miles’s mobile number from my computer and called it.

  ‘Hiya, sport,’ he boomed, as he picked up; I could hear party sounds in the background. He always slips into Aussie mode when he’s home, whereas in California he can sound as American as the next guy. ‘How did you know I was going to call you? I’ve had a couple of television stations asking me if I can get you out here. Any chance?’