by D. C. Stone
“Not a thing, but I think you know.” Barber leveled his heavy gaze on him. “I’m almost afraid to ask because I already see the answer in your eyes, but I wouldn’t be doing my duty if I didn’t.” He heaved a heavy sigh. “Have you given any more thought to what your plan is?”
His plan. The one Chris had been thinking on with whether or not to return to the military. A tough decision, but not much of one either. Hard to explain and adequately express what he wanted. The military had been all he’d known for so long, his family away from home. And that’d been the kicker the past few weeks. Realizing that Nyack, New York was his home. It was a place he’d never thought of in that aspect before. But surrounded by his brothers, his friends, and now Sam, he couldn’t look at it anyway else.
Going back overseas to fight more wars and operations didn’t hold the same appeal it had sixteen years ago. Sure, he still wanted to serve his country, but he also wanted to build his own life here with Sam. Build his own family. He had an idea on how to do that, how to get started, because civilian life was much more different from that of a military one. And with what he did in the military, there weren’t too many career options that would transfer over. But he had an idea.
He met Barber’s gaze and gave him a regretful smile. “I think you know, Colonel.”
Barber sighed and held out his hand. “I get it. And I wish nothing but the best for you, son. Don’t be a stranger, you hear?”
Chris nodded and shook his hand.
“I’m going to head out and get rolling on your separation paperwork. I’ll be in touch. Glad to see you’re okay.”
With that, Barber left the room. The angst in his chest over this decision lifted. He felt as if he could breathe freely for the first time in years. As if someone had removed a plastic bag from his head, allowing him to draw in clean air, to see clearly. This was the right choice.
He was home … for good.
Epilogue
Three weeks later
Chris grinned at Matt, who tossed quick quips back and forth with Trent, both of them trying to one-up each other on which New York baseball team was the better, the Yankees or the Mets. Personally, he found the idea of baseball a bit too slow and instead rooted for football when the season was in play. Happened to be his favorite time of the year, too, with the fall leaves changing colors.
The past three weeks had passed with no drama whatsoever. An amazing difference, seeing as the past few months had led all of them on this roller coaster of emotions and activity. He’d spent forty-eight hours in the hospital before being released. If he never went to the hospital because of a bullet passing through his muscle again, it’d be too soon.
Delta Alpha had also been released into his care, having recovered from his injuries enough to allow him to come home just three days ago.
Cooper had also stuck around, spending a lot of time between Chris’s cabin and his parents’ house. That last bit had been an interesting development, one he could only assume meant good things. Ma and Pop were good folks, and upon meeting Cooper, they’d taken him under their wings with barely a minute pause. He could tell it affected Ma, learning there’d been two little boys and not one, for she’d excused herself shortly after meeting him only to return a few minutes later with glassy eyes and reddened cheeks. Her hovering and catering to Coop was something Chris would need to keep an eye on, just to make sure that relationship was healthy, but he had a feeling all would work out well.
The only thing that didn’t quite sit right with him involved Sam still living above her clinic. They spent most of their free time together and didn’t go a night without sleeping in the same bed, but he could almost picture that hand she still held in the air, hovering, pushing him back from getting too close. She hadn’t brought up their relationship or discussed her future plans, especially when it came to the baby she carried, but every time he closed his eyes, their future together popped behind his lids.
He wanted her tied to him, wanted her to feel as if she could depend on him being there, and he’d been planning on how to make it clear, make sure she knew without a doubt that he wasn’t going anywhere.
Between his team, his brothers who had dropped in, Trent, and Cooper, he hoped the secret he planned ended up being a good surprise for her.
After handing the grill off to Matt, he went in search of the object of his thoughts, finding her surrounded by Brooke, Hailey, Sabrina, a friend who’d come along with Matt, and Ma. Sam smiled as her gaze caught his, and the sight of it knocked into him as it did each time—like a bat against his body. He took a moment to catch his breath and once again thought about how much his life had changed in the short span of a half a year. The butterflies, the losing his breath, even the figurative hearts and flowers in his vision all sounded cheesy … too soft and sweet for a soon-to-be former Spec Ops soldier.
Sunlight caused the deep red of Sam’s hair look as if it were on fire, and he’d been right all those nights ago. It was extremely pretty in the light of day, something he knew he’d never get tired of. There’d been more times than not that he had lost himself to the fascination of her hair while they sat outside as the sun went down, her attention on the changing sky before them, his on his fingers within her shimmering copper strands.
“Mijo,” Ma said, drawing his attention. “Please tell me you did not leave the grill to your father. That man has no sense of time when it comes to grilling meat and will burn each piece until the steaks break your teeth.”
Charlie snorted and Chris laughed. “Ma, seriously. You’re killer on a man’s ego. He’s not that bad.”
She just gave him a look, a slight pursing of lips and head tilted down so she peered up at him from under heavy lashes.
With a smile, he shook his head then held his hand out for Sam. “No, Matt is manning the grill. Mind if I steal Red here for a minute?”
“Just a minute? Is that all it takes?” asked Charlie.
“Charlese Lopez!” Ma yelled.
Sam laughed as his pseudo-kid sister buckled over. He kept shaking his head but laughed with them, feeling a sense of home deep inside.
This was what it was all about.
“What?” Charlie asked as Sam slid her hand into his, her palm so, so soft. “You’re the one who assumed that’s what I was talking about.”
“Pfft,” Ma said and grabbed another bell pepper. “I’ve got my eye on you, young lady. We all know what you mean. My oldest baby would never—”
“Ma!” he said, jumping in before he could figure out a hint of where she would go with that line of thinking. He didn’t want to hear it, didn’t want to know.
“What, mijo?” she asked, a mock innocence in her dancing eyes.
He mimed zipping his lips but pulled a smiling Sam toward the hallway that led down to the two attached rooms of the cabin.
“I know it doesn’t take Trent just a minute,” Charlie said under her breath, and Brooke laughed.
The sounds of their laughter grew muted as he drew Sam to a stop in front of the second door in the hall.
“I love your family,” she said, eyes alight with humor.
“Eh, they’re all right.” A lie, but it was fun to tease. “It’ll be nice when the rest of the crew drops in later this week. Jake, Luke, and Mike are completely different from the ones you’ve met so far.”
She tilted her head. “Bad different or good?”
Chris shrugged, unable to explain. “Not bad or good. Just different. You’ll see.” He pulled in a deep breath, and his nerves took flight like a thousand moths in his stomach. “I have something to show you.”
A smile played on her pink lips and curiosity sat behind her beautiful sea-green eyes. He shifted his stance and took both of her hands in his, wanting to get this right.
“Chris? What is it?”
He shook his head again, not wanting her concerned. “It’s okay. I’m just—I want to get this right.”
Her grip tightened on his fingers and she sucked in a breath,
eyes wide. All at once, he realized what he sounded like. What she thought he was about to do.
Way too fast. Way too soon.
“Whoa, whoa, not that.” He paused. “Well, yes that. But not right now. Later. Not too far later, though.”
Her cute face scrunched up. “Ummm.”
“I’m jacking this up,” he said and shifted to the door, settling his hand on the knob. “How about I just show you, then we’ll talk about it.”
“Okay,” she said hesitantly.
“The guys, well, everyone helped out with this, but no pressure. You can say no. But we hope … I mean, I hope you say yes.”
He opened the door.
“Oh!” Sam gasped and stepped inside.
The light-gray painted walls offset the rustic barn-wood shiplap accent wall with a soft charm. Hailey had found a stencil of the forest deep within the woods and painted one wall in a darker shade of gray than the rest. On the floor, they’d removed the old carpet and put down a large fluffy white rug to help protect feet from the cold winter nights, or knees and hands as they began to crawl around.
A dark maple crib sat in the corner, one he’d built with his team, and on the opposite wall was a six-drawer dresser stained to the same shade.
A nursery. For Sam and her child, should she choose him.
He stepped up behind her and ran a hand around her hip, coming to rest over her belly button and the ever-growing bump within.
“I don’t know what to say, Chris.”
He used his chin to brush hair away from her neck then kissed the fluttering pulse that marked her heartbeat. “Say yes. Move in with me. Let me take care of you.”
Within his arms, she went stiff, then faced him, her expression pained.
Her soft palms cradled his cheeks. “Hear me now, Chris,” she said, her words gentle. So gentle, a ball of unease started to coil within him. “I can take care of myself. I can even take care of myself and my baby. We are not your responsibility.”
He opened his mouth, ready to disagree, but she cut him off.
“For far too long, I had to rely on others to get by. Never learned to be my own person. I can’t allow that to happen again. I won’t allow it. Especially now that I’m about to bring another life into this world.”
And he got it. He completely understood. He remembered feeling helpless and at the mercy of others, knew that while her situation had been different, the feelings within would have been much the same.
“Yes,” she said, her eyes bright. “We’ll move in. But we’ll all take care of each other. No one person or puppy will have more responsibility than the other. We’ll all carry the same and give the same.”
He doubted he’d ever be able to give her as much as she gave him. Hope. Love. Family. There was too much she’d helped him see. Things that had been in front of him for years, but things he’d been blind to.
He wrapped his arms around her, crushing her to his chest. “Jesus, Red, do you realize how much of a heart attack you were about to give me? I thought you were about to say no.”
She laughed and pulled back. “Me? I thought you were about to propose!”
He snorted. “Nah, we’re going to get married. That much I know for sure. Just not yet.”
Her adorable nose scrunched up, fine little wrinkles making him want to kiss her all over again. “Ummm, shouldn’t that be something you ask me, rather than tell? I’m not one of your military boys to boss around, you know.”
He hooked an arm around her neck and tucked her close as if he wanted to give her a noogie, then groaned. “You are a killer on a man’s ego. Just like Ma.”
She giggled.
“Men, we’re men, Red. Not boys. Soldiers, if you can help it.”
She pushed at his stomach, digging those beautiful fingers right into the tickle spot at his side. He released her, jumping back a few steps, then grabbed the knob, intent on joining the party again and checking on the grill. Matt may have taken his strict instructions with a serious nod of his head—they all knew Pop was a man who couldn’t be helped on the grill—but he was also a man who gave in to their pop more often than not.
A quick rap sounded on the other side and Chris opened it.
“Hey, I’m sorry, man, I have to head out. A big bust just happened down at JFK and the main guy on call is tied up on another case. They need me to head in and take a look,” Matt said, an apology on his face.
Chris caught the hand he held out, slapping the palm before shaking it in an age-old way they’d done since they were kids. “Don’t be a stranger, you hear?”
Matt lifted a brow. “Shit, I have to be hearing things if you’re telling me to not be a stranger.”
“Ha, ha,” he responded, feeling Sam slide her palm against his. He pulled her into the hallway and followed his brother out from the back of the house. “Who’s on the grill?”
Matt winced and Chris wanted to cry. His mother would have a conniption. “Dude, you’re in so much trouble if he messes anything up.”
“He can’t be that bad,” Sam said beside him.
He just gave her a look.
“Shit,” she said under her breath. “Maybe I should go check on the grill.”
“You man the grill?” Matt asked, both brows raised to his hairline as if the thought of anyone else being able to man the grill was some state secret.
She laughed. “I also know how to pour a beer.”
Matt clutched his chest as if he were having a heart attack. “Be still my heart. Marry me, Samantha. I’ll give you the world.”
She shook her head, her eyes lit with delight as she headed toward the back door. “Sorry, I’ve already been told I’m marrying Chris.”
“What’s this?” his mother asked, coming from around the corner while his brother looked at him with comically wide eyes.
“Shit,” he said, reading the look in his mother’s eyes. “Ma, don’t start.”
Thunder moved over her face and she cocked a hip, a sure sign she was about to light into him. “First of all…”
“Dear God, there are parts,” Matt said next to him.
“You don’t tell a woman to marry you. You ask.”
“She’s got a point.”
Chris gave his brother a narrowed-eyed look. “You’re not helping.”
“Second,” his ma continued, “you’ve been dating her for all of, what, three months? I get she’s beautiful and I would be more than happy to have her as a daughter, but she needs to be taught. I need to teach her how to deal with you so you don’t walk all over her.”
Matt barked out a laugh, then shut up as Ma narrowed her eyes at him. “And you…” she started.
“Me, yes,” Matt said and leaped over then leaned down to plant a loud kiss on her cheek, “I must be going. Duty calls.”
Within seconds, Matt had bounded out of the room, the door closing before Chris could take another breath. He looked back at Ma, seeing the gray at her temples, the fine wrinkles lining her eyes. Love surged in his chest along with a sense of time slipping by way too fast. He couldn’t imagine his life without her and didn’t want to consider it now. “Ma,” he said, keeping his voice soft and full of meaning.
She opened her mouth, then shut it and folded her hands across her stomach. “Do it again, Christopher. She deserves better.”
He smiled. “You’re right, and I plan on it.”
“Good.” She clapped her hands. “Where’s your father?”
He winced. “You see…”
Her eyes widened. “Oh, no! Dios, mijo!”
****
Three hours later…
Chris dropped into his chair and crossed his booted feet over one another, taking in the roaring fire inside of the pit they’d built just outside of his tree line. Embers rose into the air as if dancing with one another until disappearing into the blackened sky. The aroma of roasted marshmallows and beer filled the air, the two scents somehow working with one another to create a peaceful evening.
Ma
and Pop had left just minutes ago, him walking them out to their car and seeing them away. Now, all who remained were Trent, Cooper, Dwayne, Brooke, and Hailey. He was happy to note Charlie and Sam were giggling to themselves, talking about something that had them looking over at him suspiciously. Doc and Sig sat on the other side of Charlie, watching the women’s antics with secretive smirks of their own. Delta Alpha lay to the side of Sam’s chair, eyes closed and face as peaceful as he’d seen in a long time.
The conversation with a detective down in some small town in Georgia had been enlightening. Seemed Manuel’s body had been found in a hotel room and from what Detective Lawson had said, the entire scene had been clean except for the body, which sprouted nothing but black, blue, and purple bruises across every inch of skin. Manuel had been tied to a chair, sitting in the middle of the room, and an anonymous caller had given the police instructions on where the body was and who to call—that who being him.
He didn’t know who had offed Manuel, but he wasn’t too worried over it. As far as he was concerned, that person had given Sam and him peaceful nights and minds.
The only thing that struck him as odd about the whole thing was the phone call made to him and the similarities between Luke’s stepfather’s death and that of Manuel’s…
One of the women snorted, drawing his attention to them again. They both had their laughing gazes on him. His heart turned over in his chest as worry gnawed there. After the conversation he had with Dwayne about Hailey possibly being the one who took his pills, he wanted to hover over her and watch every move she made. She’d been through so much that none of them would hold it against her, but the last thing he wanted to do was push her back into a corner after everything. D had told him he’d handle it and Chris had to trust his brother would do the right thing … and soon.
“Okay, I give,” he said. “What’s going on?” He took a long pull of his beer, drawing the amber liquid in with deep gulps. It seemed as if he’d been moving and going all day.