Can't Touch This

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by J. Hali Steele


  “What in hell does that mean?”

  “You belong to him.”

  She shook her head. “No one owns me.” The words brought to mind her very recent declaration not to tie herself to one man. “Guess I haven’t broken my vow.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “Just a promise I made to myself.” A long sigh whistled through her lips. “But what if… I mean earlier I thought he would…”

  “Don’t tell me you’re afraid?” He chuckled. “Could have fooled me the way you stood up to him.” Sikes examined her closely. “He, nor his wolf, will ever harm you.”

  “I’m not sure if it’s fear of him and what he is or fear of being misunderstood again.” Absently staring at the door, waiting for it to open and Castle to come bounding through, Harlow added, “Tying myself to a wolf shifter didn’t quite cross my mind when I woke up yesterday.” Her heart ricocheted back and forth between her ribs. Sikes was right because try as she might, Harlow couldn’t imagine Cass harming her in any way. Strength and confidence dripped from his pores as a man, and the wolf exuded the same control from what she observed briefly before he disappeared into the forest.

  “The choice is no longer yours.”

  “I could leave.”

  “Sweetheart, as long as you’re alive, he’ll find you.”

  “God!”

  “Well, it is how He made us. Must be some reason.”

  “I could have gone any place I wanted but it felt right when I moved here.” Filling her lungs with air and expelling it repeatedly slowed her erratic heartbeat. “Is he always so domineering?” Harlow already knew the answer because she was quite aware the habit followed him to the bedroom as well as other places. The scene at the truck stop entered her mind, causing a bead of sweat to trickle down her back. What would Cass have done if the trucker attempted to touch her? Jesus, she hadn’t told Cass she was married! What would he do when that became known?

  “We tend to be possessive and being in control sort of follows us in all areas of our lives.” Sikes touched her hand. “I hope that’s not the problem.”

  Her cheeks grew warm. “Not exactly.”

  “Ahh, he’s found a kindred soul—a woman who likes to be dominated.”

  “It’s not normal, it’s…”

  “Jesus, Harlow, that’s not what you meant earlier?”

  “You don’t think I’m weird?”

  He sighed. “No wonder he’s going nuts.”

  “Why would a human with these feelings make him nuts?” Harlow swirled the gin in her glass. “I thought a bunch of submissives, or omegas, inhabited wolf packs.”

  “It’s not the same. In the pack hierarchy there must be submissives to survive but it’s not by choice. You chose to be one. That’s special.”

  “Me, special?” She began to understand. “How do I fix this?” Harlow finished her drink.

  “The idea of losing you will keep him and his wolf berserk. Give it time.”

  “Can I ask a personal question?”

  “As long as you don’t tell Castle I answered it.”

  “Does the wolf ever want… Does it need to have sex?” She nibbled a fingernail. “He can never have that with me.”

  Sikes threw his head back and laughed. “We’ve been around for eons and many have evolved so much they never change. Animals adjust quickly in order to survive.” He stood and walked around the bar. “Those in this area covet freedom they find in running as the wolf. Not all do.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Harlow, we are everywhere, have been for a long time. Chances are you’ve come across one or two of my kind and didn’t even know it.”

  “I’ve heard stories.” She remembered her trips abroad to older countries with more history. “I would have smelled them.”

  His eyes pierced her. “Smelled?”

  Harlow ignored his question. “This happened so fast.”

  “Funny how we all search for someone special and when they come along, we immediately start second-guessing ourselves. Life doesn’t wait while you decide which path to take.” He poured another shot and slid it to her. “Sit at the crossroads too long, something will run up your ass.”

  “I saw women fawn over him at his restaurant. They were in his lap. Hell, they hung from him like human neckties.”

  “Women are hard to keep… Damn, before you make snap judgments, talk to Cass.”

  “Why?”

  “There are some things I have no right to tell you. Ask him. He can’t hold anything back from his mate.”

  The door opened with a bang and a group of men entered in disarray. Some wore shirts and shoes; some didn’t. They all had on pants, thank God. And damn, they all had remarkable bodies and eyes. These creatures were freaking gorgeous and fascinating.

  Harlow didn’t have a chance to get up before they crowded her at the bar. “Hey!”

  “My my, look what I found.” One very forward young male touched her hair and sniffed loudly. “Sweet.”

  Sikes Barnes admonished, “Boy, you’re barking up the wrong tree.”

  “Such a pretty tree.”

  “Suit yourself, but I smell trouble coming your way.”

  Harlow couldn’t see beyond the bodies surrounding her but a scent unlike any of the others reached her nostrils. She sucked in air, closed her eyes and savored the aroma until an earsplitting howl forced her to open them in time to see men scatter to far corners of the bar.

  Castle Briggs’s black wolf glared across the room.

  Slowly his beast prowled forward as if he owned the world. Stopping a foot from Harlow, the wolf flopped to its belly and peered at her with Cass’s weird eyes. The animal was so goddamn stunning she couldn’t resist reaching out to touch it. When she did, her hand connected with the softest fur imaginable. Pulling back, the wolf caught her fragile, human fingers in a jaw filled with sharp, deadly teeth.

  They didn’t break the skin.

  When his tongue licked her palm, she whispered, “Castle.” She swore the wolf smiled. Standing, she took hold of his scruff and followed his lead out the door and into the woods.

  Any residual fear Harlow harbored slipped away.

  Chapter Five

  Castle wanted her to see everything, know what was in store. He watched her eyes intently as he allowed his human body to emerge from within the wolf. She drew in a noisy breath as fur began to recede and skin took its place. Courageously, Harlow never turned away and he thanked God. He wasn’t sure how he’d handle any rebuff from her. Standing and stretching his over-six-foot frame, he let the claws retreat and finally stood naked before her.

  “This is what I am.” He reached to touch her face and she rubbed her cheek into his palm. “I’m your mate until…until one of us perishes from the earth.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

  “You’re beautiful.” He loved the smile curling her lips, loved the way she reached out and touched his chest ruffling the smattering of hair.

  “What if your wolf wants someone?”

  “Darlin’, my wolf is content if I am.”

  “You mean when we…”

  “Yes. It feels what I feel; it’s happy and satisfied when I’m pleased.” He stepped closer. “You make us happy, Harli.”

  “Take me home.”

  “I have a small place in Big Bear. Thought we’d spend some time there.”

  “I have to work Monday.”

  “You don’t have to.”

  “Yes I do, Cass.”

  “I never asked about your work.”

  “I manage a company called Overnight Success. I design PR brochures mostly but we do business cards and a whole gamut of print and personalized gift items.”

  “Damn, sounds exciting.”

  “It’s a living. What do you do that’s exciting?”

  Castle made lots of money. Satellites orbiting through space carried a microchip fabricated by Brigadier Circuitry. Hell, half of the plane
s lifting into the air at this very moment communicated with the help of a circuit board engineered by his company. The passengers on the planes would undoubtedly end up staying at one of his four hotels where they’d dine in one of his Michelin-starred restaurants if they flew to a major city anywhere west of the Mississippi. “I run a wolf pack.”

  “I can’t top that.”

  “How ’bout one night?” When she smiled, it was as if the sun rose, not set as it did while they returned to The Haven. “We’ll take a minute to say bye.”

  Shit! Had he made a commitment? Lord knows, he wanted Harlow and if committing was what it took to have her, so be it. Damn it to hell, why hadn’t he told her about his business holdings? Reaching the porch of the bar, he grabbed his pants and said, “Go ahead, I’ll be right in.” He pulled his jeans on, followed by his boots, while he climbed the steps. Castle almost toppled backward. Easy, she’s yours. He’d be no good to anybody if he fell and broke his goddamn neck. He yanked the shirt over his head as he entered the door. Striding to the bar, he spoke to Sikes. “Thanks for keeping an eye on Harlow.”

  “She’s a wonderful lady, Cass.” He winked. “You, my friend, are one lucky son of a bitch.”

  “I know. We’re staying in Big Bear tonight and we’ll stop by on our way back to the Valley.” Leaning closer, he whispered. “Touch her again, I’ll break your fucking hand.”

  “Haven’t lost your sense of smell.” He laughed jovially and said, “Good to have you come home.” Sikes scratched his head. “Cass, she smells you.”

  “Yeah, I know. Something I have to deal with.” Castle pivoted and spotted the young wolf he’d seen touch Harlow’s hair. He crooked his finger and the man ambled over. “You did smell my imprint on her, right?” His wolf, trapped by human flesh, prowled back and forth, seeking retribution.

  “Cass, I didn’t mean anything. It was after running… I… Shit, I’m sorry.”

  “Castle?”

  Hearing Harlow call his name made his heart beat faster. “Yeah, babe?” He continued to glower at the man in front of him, angry he had to waste a single minute of time he could be spending between Harli’s legs. “You know what’s coming?” A clawing that would leave the youth stranded for at least a night, longer if Cass wanted to be extremely vicious. He could even release his wolf completely and allow the creature to enact the punishment it thirsted for.

  “Yes.” The man had sense enough to bow his head in submission but it did nothing to stop Cass’s wolf from partially emerging. Claws sprouted from his fingertips while long incisors slid down.

  Harlow touched his arm. “Can we go?”

  He twisted his head toward her. “Don’t ever…” Castle grew quiet. Harlow’s touch sent calm winding through his veins, snapping dagger-like teeth back into his gums and returning claws to their hidden place. Letting her step into pack business might be detrimental, but the effect she had on his wolf was tremendous. The animal retreated fully and curled peacefully inside him. Hell and damnation! “This time, my wolf bows to you.”

  “Only you can touch me, Castle.”

  Though he knew she meant her body, joy filled his heart when he saw sincerity in her beautiful eyes. He lifted her up and spun her around the room for everyone to see. “This is my woman.” Setting her on the floor, he looked back at the youngster who waited with eyes cast to the floor.

  “Go, pup, enjoy what’s left of your weekend.” Eyes still cast down, he slunk back until he felt safe to turn and run back to the group gathered at the table.

  “Come on, darlin’.” He pulled her outside and to his motorcycle. Mounting the bike, he turned the key and used his foot to crank it. “You ready?”

  Harli threw her leg over, settled on the seat and gripped his waist. “Very.”

  Cass understood Harlow’s meaning in that one word. He skidded from the lot and headed for the highway. They stopped at a market to buy fixings for a salad along with a huge pack of chicken breasts. Castle had failed to hunt in the form of his animal and he was hungry enough to eat a deer. Fifteen minutes later he pulled into the yard of what he’d come to call his summerhouse. It had been years since he spent a night here but he paid a company to stop in every week to check the place and keep it clean.

  He was more than glad Harlow came with him.

  “Uh, you did say a small place?”

  “It’s small.”

  “How big is the big house?”

  He laughed and chucked her under the chin. “This one is big enough for a brood of pups.” Her eyes shifted away. “Talk to me.”

  “You don’t have any children?”

  “No.”

  “Cass, what if I can’t have kids?” She rolled a rock around with her toe. “What if I’m not ready to be pregnant?”

  “What you really mean is you’re not sure you want to have my babies.”

  “This is all new to me.” She looked into his eyes. “I don’t know what’s expected of me anywhere other than in your bed.”

  Not wanting to dampen the evening, especially after his episode at The Haven, he wouldn’t pursue this avenue of conversation. He’d never really given it thought but now his heart ached at the idea his line could stop with him. With a mate, he couldn’t see any good reason not to have children. Though many frowned upon it, it wasn’t unheard of for his kind to breed with humans. It rarely happened because those living among people eventually sought out a wolf mate. It was even rarer for them to raise what some derogatorily deemed makeshifts. No one would dare call his offspring by such a word. Castle would tear their throat out. “It’s okay.”

  No, it wasn’t.

  “Show me around.” She grasped his hand and tugged him to the front door. “Gosh, I can’t wait to see the bedroom in here.”

  Subdued, he stuck the key in the door and turned the lock. He would have carried Harlow across the threshold, but after their brief conversation, he just wanted to get in, fix a bite to eat and fall to sleep. Making love seemed out of the question now that he knew she didn’t want children, and he’d never needed or bought a condom in his life. Hell, had she realized he filled her with his seed on more than one occasion, and shit, what if she was pregnant already? How would she react to carrying and giving birth to his baby?

  Couldn’t his life ever be simple?

  * * * * *

  Muted autumn shades of orange, brown and yellow decorated Castle’s home. The floor plan was open and airy with large windows shedding lots of light on a highly polished wood floor partially covered by thick rugs that felt expensive beneath her feet. The pool she glimpsed through a window facing west sparkled in the sunlight. Harlow’s knowledge regarding antiques was limited, but she knew enough to realize those she looked at and touched as they walked around would probably cost a pretty penny.

  “The Moat does a good business.”

  “Yes.”

  Castle didn’t elaborate and Harlow didn’t pry.

  “Sikes said you grew up here.” She couldn’t make out the name on a painting she looked at and wondered if it was an original.

  “My parents grew up in Big Bear.”

  That explained it. Family money. “Are they alive?”

  “No and I have no siblings.”

  “I missed not having a brother or sister.” She assumed with the closeness of wolf packs, Cass didn’t suffer for companionship when he was younger.

  He unsnapped his chaps and threw them over a chair. “My family practically raised Hatch and, hell, he’s closer than a brother probably would have been.”

  “Is that why he’s your second?”

  “That and I’d trust him with my life.” He appeared to study her. “Children are very important to my kind.” He took her hand and pulled her behind him to the second floor where there were two master suites, two smaller bedrooms and another bathroom damn near as large as her tiny apartment. Finished giving Harlow the grand tour, he offered to grill chicken and throw a salad together while she freshened up. “I’ll leave a pair of sweat
pants and a shirt on my bed for you to change into after you shower.”

  “Thanks.”

  Harlow hurried to the bathroom, sensing she had disappointed Castle. She wasn’t ready to say she would have his babies. Christ, she had forgotten how animals existed. They needed offspring to ensure continued survival and she’d snatched that rug from beneath him.

  Showered and feeling better, she peered in the bathroom mirror after wiping away the steam and rubbed her belly. What would it feel like to have a child, his child, grow inside her, and was it even possible for a human to carry a shifter’s baby? Harlow hadn’t even shown enough interest to ask that question. Would it resemble her or Cass? She was sure of one thing—if it shifted, it most definitely would resemble him. What if it was a girl? How could she tell her daughter what to expect from life when it would be so different from hers and, bottom line, did she even have a right to bear a child in the circumstances she found herself? Oddly enough, she never talked of having children with Jeff, nor did she want them with him. Shit, she had to tell Castle she was still married. Harlow committed a sin each time she looked at him with ideas of lust raiding her imagination.

  Everything ran in circles through her mind, made her dizzy. Why, oh why, was she giving so damn much thought to having Castle Briggs’s babies? She had only met him a day ago.

  Yet when he touched her, Harlow felt as if she’d known him a hundred years.

  A light tap on the bathroom door made her jump. “Come on, slowpoke, I’m starved.”

  “Be right there.” Cass had laid out a pair of white cotton pants and a t-shirt big enough for Harlow to wear as a dress. She decided to forgo the pants. Knotting one side of the shirt’s hem, she was pleased with her effort to look sexy. “Okay, so you still want him.” What if he didn’t have condoms? Harlow sat heavily on the edge of the bed when it hit her.

  They had never used protection.

  “Good lord.” Standing, she paced the room until she came to a decision. Her hand went to her stomach and she took a deep breath. “The horse has left the barn.”

  She went downstairs and when she entered the kitchen, he said, “Thought I’d have to come carry you.”

 

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