by Leaona Luxx
Bloggers, what can I say that every author hasn’t said? You amaze me at what you do, how you do it. Working women, mothers, wives, daughters and bloggers, even a few gentlemen thrown in, who work very hard at what they do. You do it all and somehow find the time to read and write from your heart. Thank you for all you do.
Bottom Turner’s, the best group in the reading world. You jumped in and accepted me from minute one. Babbling fool that I was, lost and confused, you took me in and loved me…I owe you. #Muah
Cover Luxe Design, the best damn cover designer in the world. Thank you for your amazing insight and understanding of what I needed. I love your face.
Enticing Journey Promotions, Ena and Amanda. Oh, my. Love your heart, what you took on and how you handle me was amazing. I love you both.
Kelsey, Jackie, Nicole and Katrina, thank you ladies. I would not have made it here without you.
Author Silla Webb and Masque of the Red Pen, I was lucky enough to meet you in person last November and you were the sweetest. It didn't cross my mind until this last day, how the good Lord puts people in your life for a reason. He knew then, how much you would mean to me now. I'm blessed with your friendship and thankful for your help. I can never thank you enough for taking this on and seeing it through the way it deserved. My daddy must have sent you to me. Thank you.
To my amazing children, from texts to reads to phone calls. Screaming, crying, yelling and laughing. My very first betas. My very own cheerleaders. My heart. The greatest thing I’ve ever accomplished was not messing you up. You’ll never understand how proud and honored I am to be your mother. The amazing women you have chosen to be by your side, show me that you, also, got it right. I’m very thankful for you six people. I love each of you. Thank you, for loving me.
Mom. You are the most amazing person that I have ever known. I realize everyone says that, I know it to be true. Your strength and wisdom goes beyond understanding. Your love and compassion cannot be measured. Words do not do your beauty justice and no love can compare to that which you shared with us and dad. Thank you for being my mom. I love you.
To my husband, you. Two people who, within six weeks, went all in. Never easy but always worth it in the end. You didn’t have the words to say that you loved me and I didn’t know how to be loved without words. Through this book, you journeyed with me, to help me understand how loved I am. To help me learn, to love myself. To show me, I deserved love. You’ve been by my side, even when I knew I didn’t deserve it. Since my dad passed, I’ve often said, I’ve lost my hero. How wrong I’ve been. Not only are you’re my knight but you are my hero. It’s you and me, against the world. I love you.
I never thought losing you would render me helpless as it has. So many people in my day to day life will never understand the loss of such an amazing human being. I worked endlessly to teach my children how to love and accept people as you did. Traveling the world for God and country, you made me a proud daughter with your military service. Not only were you an officer but a complete gentleman. You touched so many lives, from your easy words of wisdom and understanding, to your words of love and tolerance as a person and minister. The only thing to compare your love to would be the fountain of youth, always making me feel like a child, safe in her father’s arms, never ending. Loved for who I am and adored for who I am not. Your love of God only rivaled by the love for my mom, your wife. I searched to find a man who would love me, the way you loved mom. Not knowing our love would be different but just as strong. Only knowing, I wanted to be loved by a man, the way you loved mom. Sitting by your bedside as you took your last breath was not only heartbreaking but wonderful. Me. The most imperfect person on earth, was honored to be present for your last minutes on earth. How underserving I am. How blessed I am. I miss your words of comfort, flowing like calm waters. Slow, steady and easy. Your love, will forever be etched in our hearts. May the world grieve for the person they did not know; may our hearts heal for the one we miss. I love you.
Table of Contents
Copyright Leaona Luxx 2016 Cherry Grove
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-one
Chapter Twenty-two
Chapter Twenty-three
Chapter Twenty-four
Chapter Twenty-five
Chapter Twenty-six
Chapter Twenty-seven
Chapter Twenty-eight
Chapter Twenty-nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-one
Epilogue
Acknowledgements