“Vanessa,” Glyn shouted – though his voice sounded a million miles away.
I staggered and then fell to the pavement, my body jerking and seizing, and the darkness beginning to wash over me.
Chapter Eighteen
Vanessa
A bright light dominated my vision, blinding me, making it impossible to see anything. The trembling started in my hands and feet and moved inward first, before moving outward. It felt like an intense pressure was building up in the center of my body right before it was expelled outward through my mouth. It was like a scream, only silent.
I lay on the ground seizing, and I heard Glyn shouting my name – but even his voice quickly faded. My entire consciousness seemed to fade and I felt myself being pulled into a pool of darkness – one where there was no sound, no light, no sensation. I was adrift in a vacuum with no idea how to get myself out.
But, as my consciousness faded, another rose within me. And from that point on I was no longer Vanessa. I was Onda. She had taken over my body completely and had shut me away in the dark.
Trapped in the darkened vacuum, I watched as her life flashed before my eyes like a movie being projected onto a screen. I watched as she trained to be a Ranger. Watched as she fell in love with Glyn – which looked and felt much the same way I felt myself falling for him too.
And I watched as she hunted. I watched as she killed. Her skills were breathtaking. The way her body moved when she was fighting was pure poetry. Art in motion. She moved with a grace and beauty that was unnatural. It was visually stunning and yet incredibly deadly at the same time. There was nothing about Onda that couldn't be described as beautiful. Ethereal.
The voice in my head – my voice – was being drowned out by Onda's voice. At first, I couldn't comprehend what it was saying to me. But I figured this was my swan song, this was my goodbye. I thought that Onda would push me out, trap me in the darkness forever, and take over my body. I thought that she was asserting her dominance over me so that she could live with Glyn forever and ever – or at least, for however long my body lasted her.
I was finding a peace and acceptance in the dark void. They belonged together. I was the interloper. I was the third wheel. They should be together. They should live out their days together. They deserved it. I found peace in being happy to be able to facilitate that. I let myself float in the darkness, completely devoid of sensation, just waiting until the last of my consciousness melded with the dark.
But then I heard Onda's voice again and made out what she was saying.
“Vanessa, hold on,” she said. “It's only going to hurt for a moment, and then I'll be gone. You'll be free. Trust me.”
She'll be gone? What did that mean?
“Take care of Glyn for me,” she said, her voice so crystal clear in my head. “He can't be alone. He needs you. Be there for him like I was, Vanessa. And please tell him I love him and will see him in the next world.”
“No, don't go Onda!” I called back to her. “You don't have to go. We can share my body. I see now that my life was pathetic before. But now, because of you, I was a badass warrior. And I can't go back to that other life. I won't. We can continue to live together, in harmony like we have been. Either don't go, or leave me in the void, Onda. I don't want that old life. I might as well be dead.”
“No, we can't share,” Onda said. “Eventually, my essence would take over. I'm stronger than you, Vanessa. And I can't do that to you. I won't. It's my time to go. But I'm leaving with you a part of me. I'm gifting you a piece of my essence. Glyn needs someone by his side and it's the only way.”
“What does that all mean? I don't understand, Onda,” I called. “Please, don't go.”
But there was no answer to my calls. To my plea.
“Onda, what do you mean a part of you?” I called. “What part of you? I don't understand.”
“The badass warrior part,” she said at last, her voice carrying a hint of amusement. “This will only hurt for a second, Vanessa –”
The pressure in my chest grew higher and higher and I felt like my insides were going to explode. I tried to scream out, but when I did, only light came out of me – bursting from my mouth and spewing into the air around me. I watched as the brilliant light danced in the air in front of me, in front of Glyn. It hovered there for a long moment, as if it was saying its goodbyes. And then it rose upward, quickly disappearing into the sky.
And then, my world went black.
~~ooo000ooo~~
I awoke with a start, staring at an unfamiliar ceiling. My body jerked suddenly and I sat up, crying out. My throat was sore. Hell, everything on me was sore. It felt like my insides had been ripped out and then put back into place with fishing line and duct tape. Coughing hurt and I couldn't speak, but I realized where I was.
Glyn's apartment.
And Glyn was sitting in a chair he'd pulled over to the side of the bed. He watched me with concern upon his face. Once I sat up though, he rushed to my side. He stood beside me, taking my hand in his and repeating my name.
“Vanessa, are you okay?” he asked. “Vanessa?”
Finally, I came to my senses and was able to answer, “Yes,” I said, my throat raw and my voice scratchy. “I think so at least.”
Relief flooded his face as he sat down beside me on the bed, head in his hands. “I was worried I'd lost you too,” he said.
I tried to remember what had happened to me, but couldn't recall everything. All I remembered was the bright light and the darkness. As I racked my brain, I recalled Onda apparently speaking to me as well. But it all had such a surreal quality, I wasn't sure what was real and what wasn't. Fact and fiction blended together, the lines between real and imaginary blurring together until I couldn't differentiate one from the other.
“What happened?” I asked.
“Onda's essence left your body,” his voice was barely more than a whisper and I could see the pain in his face as he said it. “She's gone, Vanessa.”
Reaching out, I stroked his arm softly. “I'm sorry, Glyn. I - I think she spoke to me before she left. It's fuzzy and I'm not really sure it happened, but I recall hearing her voice.”
“Did she?” he looked at me, his face brightening slightly. “What did she say?”
“I think I remember her telling me to take care of you,” I said. “And she told me she was leaving me a small piece of herself because you needed a sidekick. A Robin to your Batman.”
His smile was small, but warm. “That sounds like her,” he said, and after a few moments, he added, “she spoke to me too.”
“She did? How?”
“Through you,” he said. “While you were out of it.”
Tears welled up in his eyes, and I wanted nothing more than to pull him to me, to comfort him. I felt closer to him than I should, but maybe that was part of what Onda left behind. Carefully, I scooted toward him and was close enough that I gently stroked his cheek and turned his face toward me.
“What did she say?” I asked.
“That she loved me,” he said, leaning into my touch.
“I know she did,” I said softly. “Before she left, I saw how much she loved you, Glyn. She loved you more than life itself, and she wants you to live, to be happy. She also wanted me to tell you just how much she loved you and that she would be waiting for you in the next world.”
He nodded, a lone tear racing down his cheek. “Because she was a good woman.”
I wanted nothing more than to kiss the tears away. He'd not only lost the love of his life once, but he'd had to endure it a second time. And the pain was so clear on his face, that it broke my heart.
“And you're a good man, Glyn,” I said. “You deserve to be happy.”
“Thank you, Vanessa,” he said. “I really am glad you're okay. You scared me for a moment.”
“It scared me too, but I'm already feeling better. It's strange, but I feel stronger than I did before,” I said.
I had to wonder, what other parts of herself ha
d Onda left behind for me. I remember that she'd told me she was leaving “the badass warrior part,” because Glyn needed someone by his side.
But realistically, that could mean any number of things. Though, I had a fairly good idea what it meant. I could still feel it inside of me.
My desire – and ability – to hunt alongside him. To battle the creatures of the night with him. The desire was strong and I couldn't wait to get started.
Chapter Nineteen
Glyn
Onda had told me she loved me, that part was true. But I hadn't told Vanessa everything. It was personal and that was between Onda and me.
As I fell asleep that night, I dreamed of that moment again. I dreamed of seeing her essence floating above Vanessa, of hearing her speak to me. At first, she spoke through Vanessa, using her mouth and voice – until her essence finally came out of her. And when that glowing ball of light hovered before me, I could hear Onda's voice as clear as day.
“I love you,” she said.
“I love you too, Onda,” I said. “I miss you every minute of every single day.”
“She's going to take care of you now,” she said. “Let her in, Glyn. You don't need to spend the rest of your life alone. I don't want you to. I want you to find love. To be happy.”
She was giving me permission to be with Vanessa. Or rather, it was more like she was giving me an order to be with her. I looked down at Vanessa, the white streak gone from her hair. She was just Vanessa now. A normal human. A nurse. The good Samaritan who'd tried to save Onda in the alley that night.
“Oh, but she's so much more now,” Onda's voice whispered to me. “So much more.”
“I love you, Glyn,” she said. “And I will see you again.”
And then she was gone. Just like that, I'd lost my beloved Onda once more.
Startled, I woke up with my heart pounding and adrenaline coursing through me. I was sleeping in a chair across from the bed where Vanessa was sleeping. She still had to heal, and I was taking care of her. It was my responsibility to help her now – especially after everything she'd done for me.
I stared at her, fast asleep and breathing softly. I had to admit that she was beautiful. Nothing like Onda, of course. She looked nothing at all like her. But she was beautiful nonetheless.
The memory of Onda's voice echoed in my head, “Let her in.”
Vanessa turned over and I saw that her eyes were open. Her brown eyes – no longer the icy blue ones that belonged to Onda. She smiled at me as she sat up.
“Can't sleep, huh?” she asked.
“Not really,” I said.
“Me neither,” she said with a sigh. “I mean, I sleep for moments here and there, but I can't sleep like I used to. Not at night anyway.”
“Let me guess, you're restless?”
“I am,” she said. “It sounds crazy, but I want to hunt. I don't want to be bedridden like this. I want to get out there, hunt down those evil things in the dark. I promise, I feel better, Glyn.”
“I believe you,” I said. “Maybe we can venture out tomorrow night – it's almost morning now.”
“Yeah, I suppose so,” she said, turning from the window and staring back at me with a soft smile. “I probably should go back to work soon too. The kids need me.”
I remembered that she worked in pediatrics and I knew without a doubt, that was why Onda loved her. While we never discussed having children of our own – we were Rangers after all, and that life wasn't well suited for being parents – she'd always had a soft spot for children. Especially human children. We protected the humans, that's what we did.
And Vanessa did too. In her own way.
“What are you thinking about?” she asked me.
“Honestly?” I considered not telling her the truth to protect myself, but I did anyway. She deserved to know. “I'm actually thinking about how amazing you are.”
That brought an adorably awkward smile to her face. She sat up and patted the bed next to her, inviting me to join her. I hesitated for a second, remembering Onda's words, and then joined her on the bed. She curled up next to me, placing her head on my shoulder, and I stroked her hair.
It all somehow felt so natural. So right. Just the two of us sitting there, in silence. I reached out with my senses and found that it really was just the two of us. Onda was truly gone. It was just Vanessa, but I was surprised as hell to find that was somehow enough for me. When she looked up at me with those big, brown eyes, my heart melted. Onda approved of her and the memory of her voice told me I shouldn't fight it so hard.
Leaning down, I placed a soft kiss on the tip of her nose. Then I moved lower and kissed her lips, gently, hesitantly. She touched my face and she kissed me back. Before, we'd been in a haze and it all seemed so surreal. But this time, I was very much in the moment and enjoying the feel of her mouth pressed to mine.
As she touched me, I smiled at her and asked, “You sure you're feeling up to it?”
Raising an eyebrow, she teased, “Are you?”
Her hand moved lower, rubbing against the erection in my jeans and I groaned softly.
“I guess I have my answer,” she whispered, rolling over so she was now straddling me. With her hips pressing down into me, she stared into my eyes. “And to answer your question, yes. I'm very much up for it.”
I slipped her shirt off, this time paying attention to her body. Her breasts were round and full – they overflowed in my hands. She was so different from Onda, yet she was so beautiful. So sexy. It felt like the first time with her, and I wanted to savor every moment.
As I teased her nipple with my fingertips, Vanessa threw her head back and let out a soft moan as she ground herself against me. She moved her body up and down on top of me, getting hotter and wetter until neither of us could take it anymore. I slipped her pants down and she helped me get them off of her as she removed my belt, reaching her hand into my pants and grabbing hold of me. I moaned as she took me in her hand and squeezed me tight. Her small, soft hands moved up and down my shaft as she stared into my eyes.
“I can't explain it, Glyn,” she said, biting her lip, “but I feel so drawn to you, so close to you. I feel like we have a connection – have had a connection for a while, actually.”
“I feel the same way, Vanessa.”
I knew Onda had a role in how we were both feeling, but I wasn't complaining. Vanessa lowered her body and took me inside of her, making my eyes roll back in my head as she slid all the way down until I was fully sheathed inside of her. She was so tight, so hot, and so wet, that when she started to move, I almost lost control right then and there. I quickly managed to regain control of myself and pulled myself back off that ledge. I wanted to take time to savor and enjoy every moment with her.
“Jesus Christ,” I muttered, grabbing onto her hips once our bodies had been joined.
“I didn't think you were a religious man,” Vanessa said and winked at me.
“I guess I wasn't until I met you.”
Slowly, she started rocking back and forth on top of me, taking me deeper and deeper inside of her. From the position I was in, I was able to play with her breasts and suck on those perfect nipples.
“Yes, yes, yes,” she muttered, her movements getting faster and more deliberate. “Oh God, yes!”
I felt her whole body tense up, but her muscles down below tightened around me, squeezed me tight. I knew that she was on the precipice of an orgasm, so I thrust my hips upward, driving myself deeper inside of her, and she absolutely exploded.
She cried out loudly as she came, her head flying forward, landing on my chest as she moaned in pure ecstasy. Her body still trembling, she put her hands on my chest and started to move herself up and down on me, harder and faster. There was a look of absolute desire and determination in her eyes. She'd gotten off and wanted to make sure I did as well.
I grabbed hold of her hips and guided her, up and down, on me – slamming myself deeper and harder into her. She moaned and cried out, calling my name as
she continued to ride me, continued to take me deep inside of her. I felt the pressure building up inside of me and knew that I wasn't going to last much longer. She simply felt too good.
The sounds coming from her mouth – combined with the tightening of her muscles so she was gripping me – were enough to finally send me over the top as well. My entire body tensed up and I threw my head back, moaning loud enough that my neighbors probably heard me. And then the sensation got to be too intense and as she came down hard on me, taking me even deeper inside of her, I let go and shot my seed deep inside of her – which seemed to touch off another explosive orgasm inside of her.
She cried out again, louder than ever before, and I pulled her down harder on to me. I was still pumping hot seed into her as she started to thrash wildly, her orgasm gripping her tight. We both cried out, moaning and thrashing, our bodies writhing in mutual pleasure as we rode out our orgasms together.
She stayed there, on top of me, for a while. It had been an intense – and intensely pleasurable – experience and it felt nice to just lay there, curled up with her. I felt myself growing soft inside of her until she rolled over beside me. Once she did, I curled up next to her and took her in my arms.
This time, I wasn't wracked with guilt after being with her. It was still strange, and it was still hard being with someone else so soon, but I had Onda's blessing.
Like she said, I deserved to be happy.
EPILOGUE
A Few Months Later
Vanessa
“That was a sick kill,” Glyn said as the two of us walked back to my apartment.
We would have gone to his, but mine closer after our latest mission. Thick, black blood covered the front of me – a parting gift from another Xar Queen who'd tried to move into LA to fill the void of power the last Queen had left.
Well, that was the new Queen's mistake because I was going to take her head, the same way the guys had taken the old Queen's head.
“Thanks,” I said. “I couldn't have done it without Onda.”
Yes, some might think it was weird to refer to his ex-girlfriend in casual conversation like that. But in our own little way, it was how we honored her. She was literally part of me for a few days and I felt like I knew her better than anyone – anybody except for Glyn, of course. He'd known her for a lot longer than I had, but I had gotten to see inside her head. I'd gotten to know her in ways no one else could.
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