Her heart stuttered, and her blood ran cold. Her son’s eyes were brown. Anha forced her pupils wider, drawing in light in the dim cave. She fingered the pelts on their tiny heads. Was their fur black...or deep red? Were they all sired by Mattayas? Or just Missayan? Or two of the three?
They would kill her sons...whichever ones showed signs of Wul parentage. Anha tried to come to terms with that concept, but it was impossible to. They were her young, no matter what else they were. They were innocent of their parentage. They were beautiful, loving...
“Mine,” she promised.
But to keep them all alive, she had to find a way to leave unobserved. It would have to be in the harsh light of day, when few would be stirring and fewer would want to stop her.
Where will I go? It will be hard enough surviving without a nest, but both the Lyx and Wul will kill us on sight. Where can we hide?
It would have to be the cursed lands. No one would follow them there. They would be assumed dead. Only the dead lived in the cursed lands, and it was said that no one who entered ever returned.
Is it true? Will we escape death here only to be killed there?
It didn’t matter. If they stayed here, her sons would be killed, and Anha would no doubt choose to follow them.
Maybe it’s only Missayan. Maybe the other two will live. Many babies died in the first year. It wouldn’t be unusual to lose one. If she stayed, she and the other two could live on in the comfort and safety of the nest.
Maybe it’s not! Should she stay here, let them kill Missayan, then Mittayan, then Thomayan, as each showed signs of being Mattayas’s sons, dying a little at a time herself?
That was unacceptable. She had to leave.
* * * *
Anha crept along the tunnels, passing through the common nest without incident. It was high-day, and her body protested her activity level at this Luna-forsaken hour. Still, leaving now would nearly ensure her success.
The sunlight filtering into the tunnel entrance was nearly blinding in its intensity. Lyx were nocturnal hunters. Their eyes were light-gathering, and her pupils narrowed to thorn-points to cut out as much of the glare as possible.
Her heart had eased and her spirits lightened when the sound came behind her. Anha whirled, prepared to fight for her freedom and the life of her sons...and came face-to-face with Zuma.
Her sister trailed a hard look from Anha to the babies and back again. The question of what she intended wasn’t posed.
Still, answers warred in Anha’s mind and fought for escape from her suddenly-raw throat. This solved every problem save her own survival. Her sons wouldn’t be killed by her nest mates. Mattayas would leave the Lyx lands. Even if he followed her scent to the cursed lands, it was unlikely he’d follow her in, and if he did... She and her young faced death from the elements or starvation, so it was little added risk.
“Go.” Zuma’s voice was rough in emotion, and she seemed to have trouble controlling her expression.
“I must,” Anha assured her.
“I know. You’ve suffered too much. Just...go.”
Anha swallowed down a sob and turned, loping into the dense growth a few body-lengths from the nest. She turned back for one last look at Zuma, but her sister was gone. That alone almost sent Anha back, but the warmth of her sons against her chest reminded her what was at stake. With a heavy heart, she headed for the scentless boundary that marked the cursed lands.
Animal Instincts
Chapter Five
Anha paused, chewing slowly, training her ears to the forest. There was something wrong, an unnatural stillness about it. The birds didn’t call. The frogs were silent. There was even a lack of scent...more than usual for the cursed lands, as if even the lesser animals had ceased to exist.
She swallowed, placing the meat on the stone beside her, making a show of settling her sons further into their sling. Anha eased her dagger out, noting a telltale skitter of leaves to her left rear. A rustle came from the right rear. Someone was closing on her...a group of unknown enemies.
Was it her own nest mates? Mattayas? Whoever it was, Anha would fight to the death. She sobered in the realization that she’d likely have to; whoever it was wasn’t going to welcome her with open arms.
Ducking down to use the boulders as shelter and cover, Anha moved toward the heavy brush at her right.
“Very good,” a strange fem noted.
Anha sank deeper between two stones, bringing out her left claws to supplement the dagger clenched in her right hand.
“Better,” the voice continued. “You would protect your young to the death against known and unknown.”
Anha eased further away from the voice silently, certain that they wanted a reply to get a fix on her location.
“A sister spirit,” a second fem stated, this one from the direction Anha was traveling...and close.
Anha swallowed down a growl of frustration.
A third...closer and to her back. “Bring your cubs and come, fem.”
Her breathing hitched.
“Enough,” the first ordered. “Reason it, sister. There is only one thing that drives fems here.”
The stories coursed through her mind. The elders said this place was cursed, that the dead lived here. She and her sons were dead to her nest, and they would curse her for saving the cross-bred babies.
The voice drew closer. “We can scent our own, and you are upwind.”
“What do you want?” Anha asked. If they meant to kill her sons, they’d have to kill Anha first.
“You are our fem now. Your young cubs are of our nest.”
Cubs. Not kits. They know what my sons are. “Why?” Why would anyone accept them now?
“You are a strong hunter and a strong fighter, sister. We can always use another.”
“And?” Was earning their keep upon her full recovery that precious to them, or was there a trick to the having?
“As cursed, should we do to you what was done to us? Should we cast you out? Try to kill you? Take the cubs you’ve come to love from you?”
Anha’s heart raced faster as she sighted movement. “You were also a fem mounted by a Wul tom?” she asked.
Laughter seemed to come from every direction, making Anha sick in realization. She’d already lost, if it came to a battle.
“Will you come?” the leader asked.
“It seems I have no choice.”
The face of a kindly fem elder appeared above her. “Of course, you do. You could continue to live feral, but winter comes hard and fast in the cursed lands. We have food. We have shelter. You could recover...then hunt.”
Anha hesitated, certain it was too good to be true. “I will...consider your offer.”
A hand extended down to her, bringing the distinct scent of both Wul and Lyx. “Consider it within the warmth of our walls?”
She nodded, forced to the decision by the promise of warmth for her sons.
* * * *
Anha was overwhelmed by the comforts Siya’s nest afforded. The rock walls seemed to radiate warmth, and a stream ran just beneath the caverns, alternately hiding behind the rock and pooling in corners of individual nests. It offered cool, sweet water in the common areas and cleansing water in the sister-nests. Everywhere she looked, there was stored food from successful hunts, and there was an excess of clothing and blankets.
“How do you live so comfortably?” Anha asked. “Is it the peace? The lack of competition for prey?”
Siya laughed heartily. “The humans.”
Anha’s heart pounded in the memory of the human tales she’d been raised on. They were weak in many ways, but they were dangerous animals. They killed for sport and took prizes of live young to cage and pelts. She shied, seeking the shadows, her arm wrapping around the sling protectively.
“They don’t come here,” Siya assured her. “On the rare occasion that they do, they signal and come in to right their...equipment while we are gone from the nest.”
“E...equip... What is that
?”
Siya motioned uncertainly. “The...the things that make the walls warm when the weather is cold and cool when the weather is hot. The things that make our water clean and plentiful. The glass bits that let them see how we live.”
Anha growled, her fur standing on end and growing thick over her fisted hands. “Why would you let them stalk you?” she hissed out a sibilant s.
“In exchange, they provide well for us...much better than they provide for the Wul and Lyx who do not accommodate their interest in our ways.”
“Provide?” she challenged. “Humans do not—”
“Have you found the packs? The ones abandoned in the forest or washed downstream?”
Anha hesitated to answer that, unease stealing over her. “I assumed the humans lost them. They’ve lost them before.” But, her stomach squirmed in the surety that it wasn’t so.
“What humans?” Siya asked calmly. “Have you seen them? Have you ever scented a human, save on their packs?”
Anha shook her head, at a loss to explain it.
Siya nodded. “We are on protected lands...the Wul, the Lyx, and our people. No human is allowed to set foot here, save the ones that learn from watching us. They haven’t been permitted here for three generations.”
“Why did the humans leave? Why would they?”
Siya shook her head, seemingly considering her answer. “Humans are complicated creatures. I’ve never fully understood their reasons, but the stories passed down from the queen’s-queen three before me, the one who made the agreement with the humans, say the humans were changing us, changing how we live, harming us in the process.”
“But...giving us the packs is interfering in how we live. Isn’t it?” None of this made sense.
“That damage was done, before they withdrew. We’d come to depend on the comforts stolen from human interlopers into our territory. Not even the oldest stories I know can tell me what we wore before we wore human clothing. Perhaps the pelts of prey? I cannot say with confidence.”
“Perhaps we spent more of our time in animal form,” Anha suggested. “The tales speak of a time when we could all change at will.”
Siya seemed to consider that. “And there are tales of human cubs and kits conceived much as your own cubs were conceived with a Wul sire.”
“Do you believe that may have made us unable to shift at will?”
“Who but Luna can say?” Siya smiled then turned and led the way down the corridor.
Anha spied a dark glass circle in the wall, hissed at it in warning, and moved on. Siya may trust the humans, but Anha didn’t.
Siya continued, as if Anha hadn’t made a sound. “For now, I will show you to the nest that will be yours.”
Anha considered that. “A private nest?” Was she unwelcome, after all? She’d had a private nest when her sons were born, mainly because she had no proof that they were Lyx. The older queens were hesitant to let the other young bond with what might ultimately prove to be half-Wul young.
“Most choose sisters or mates eventually, and this nest becomes empty, in wait for a new outcast to find us. Until you forge such a bond...” She pulled back the cloth door and waved Anha inside. “There is food and water, for your comfort. I know you won’t want to leave your cubs to seek it soon.”
Anha stepped inside, her heart pounding, but it was a simple nest, with a wide family bed and the promised supplies. “My thanks,” she forced out, but Siya was already gone, the cloth swinging in her wake.
* * * *
“Anha?” Siya called out from the other side of the door.
“Come in,” she grumbled in return, rubbing a hand over her eyes.
She’d slept poorly, almost worse than she had in the forest. It was no fault of Siya’s. It was a new place with new sounds, new scents...a disconcerting mix of Lyx, Wul, and cross-breed, until Anha was no longer certain which she found most threatening.
The cloth slid aside, and the queen entered, setting something heavy next to the bed.
Anha forced her eyes open a slit, staring at the deep green canvas bag without comprehension. “What is it?”
“The humans know we have new young among us.”
Her heart rate sped, pounding hard in her ears. Humans took young in cages. She slid to her hands and knees, shielding her sons, her fangs extending...then her claws. Her nose flattened, her face reshaped, fur sprouted and spiked in warning.
“They mean no harm, Anha.” Siya kept her distance, showing respect and caution in the face of a queen protecting her young.
Anha hissed at the dark circle in the wall. If the humans could see her, they would be suitably warned.
“It seems to be a pack ritual for humans. When new young are born here or arrive from outside the cursed lands, a bag arrives. They do not approach but rather leave the bag at the boundaries of our sentries.”
She growled, arching her back, her fur bristling on end.
“The humans don’t interfere, Anha...even when our young die, and they have the ability to save them.”
That made no sense, which seemed to be typical of humans. Anha slid back into human form, exhausted by her efforts. It was difficult to force herself so close to full Lyx form at mid-moon, but her sons were worth the effort.
“What is it?” Anha’s voice was still rough, and she maintained her crouch over her young.
Siya shrugged. “Most likely clothing for you and your sons, blankets...perhaps bowls and a basin for washing. I will leave you to your investigation.” She left without further comment.
Anha held her ground for a few moments, her muscles tensed. Finally, she scrambled to the bag and dragged it back to the bed. The clasp at the top stuck then slid free. She pulled out item after item, her heart pounding in disbelief. It was just as Siya had foretold...and it was more than she’d ever owned in her life.
* * * *
Anha let her eyes drift shut but kept her senses primed, not quite sleeping but close enough to settle her mind. On some level, she wished she could sleep in this new nest. On another, she didn’t dare dream of such a thing. Not now. Not while she was still without insight into their motives and means.
Siya and the others had shown no sign of aggression, and the scent of Wul and Lyx mixed should have put her at ease, but it didn’t. She’d promised herself to wander out into the common nest the following day, with her sons in their sling. The only way she’d assure herself that there wasn’t a threat was to expose herself to the possibility of it.
She’d been something of a coward so far. The two nights beneath warm blankets and with plentiful food she didn’t have to run herself ragged to catch had made her shamefully cautious when she should be assessing dangers and making the decisions that would rule the rest of their lives.
Cowardice could only stretch so far. No matter what Anha chose to do, it would have to be soon. If she and her sons were to leave this nest, she would need adequate time to provide a nest of her own for them, as daunting as that sounded.
One of her sons latching on snapped her awake, and Anha grimaced at the fact that she’d fallen asleep. True, she was a nursing queen with new young. By Luna’s design, she should be sleeping ten times what she was allowing herself. Still, it seemed she was neglecting her duty as sole protector to her sons when she indulged in her need to do so.
Torn, Anha focused on the young tom, startled to see that Thomayan had opened his eyes and joined his elder brothers in the world of the sighted. Her heart stuttered then soared at the sight of green irises.
He was Thoman’s son. She had one kit that was pure Lyx, praise Luna.
Her smile disappeared, a laugh dying in her throat. Her gaze strayed to the other two young, Mattayas’s young.
A single pure Lyx kit didn’t change her situation. She’d left her nest to save one, two, or all of her young from being killed. What was she thinking? That she could choose to lose Missayan and Mittayan? That she could leave them for this nest to raise and return to her own without them? It was as
inconceivable as letting them die.
“Never. We all stay, Thomayan,” she managed. If her nest couldn’t accept them all, returning there wasn’t an option.
She looked at the cloth that separated her, by her wish, from the rest of this new nest. They would accept Thomayan as a pure Lyx kit, as they’d accepted Anha as a pure Lyx mother of mixed-breed young. In the morning, she would test their responses.
Exhaustion weighed on her. For now, I have to sleep. Without sleep, she wouldn’t be capable of fighting off any threat. Like it or not, drifting rest wasn’t enough.
Animal Instincts
Chapter Six
Mattayas stopped abruptly, burying his nose in the pine needles and leaves, his heart racing at the scent he’d missed for so long. He wasn’t certain why he still came here, why he still searched for her. It wasn’t as if she was his mate. This attraction should have faded long ago.
Of course, he knew why he was coming more often. If her young were Lyx, they would have been born long ago. If they were Wul, she would whelp them soon.
It was a useless endeavor, he was sure. He hadn’t scented more than a waft of her essence since the day he’d marked over her scent in claim.
Worse, if she was denning with new young, she wouldn’t risk emerging for half a moon or more after the young had whelped.
But that will answer my question, he argued silently. If she emerges now, scented of young and milk, I will know the young cannot possibly be mine, because she should be denning in earnest.
To his chagrin, Mattayas admitted that he’d want her, no matter whose young she’d carried. Would this madness never end?
As if in answer, he caught scent of her...a strong scent...new...not more than a quarter sun-journey old. He growled at the sweet odor of milk. She’d carried for the Lyx buck, after all.
Animal Instincts Page 3