“No!” Adam jumped forward in panic. Ren’s words sounded too final, too absolute. “Stay, please.”
“I can’t give you what you want,” Ren said again, his eyes begging Adam to understand.
“If you can’t stay, then promise me you’ll at least come back. Please. Spend the day with me tomorrow. We can go to some of those flea market sales, hang out in the park, see a movie. Whatever you want.”
Renatus hesitated, his eyes clouded over with something Adam couldn’t identify.
“I cannot stay. Not tonight.”
Adam dropped his gaze to the floor and tried to nod. Had disappointment ever hurt this much before tonight?
“Will I see you tomorrow?”
“Yes.” The answer came without hesitation. Reassuring.
“Good, then.” He could wait a night.
Adam opened his mouth to say more, but when he looked up, the front door stood open and Ren was gone.
* * * * *
Ren set the tray on the small café table and tried to quell the butterflies in his stomach.
Adam was coming.
He set out the two breakfasts he’d purchased, fussing over turning the plates this way and that, until he sensed Adam turn the corner. Looking up, he met Adam’s gaze and the butterflies’ gentle fluttering exploded into a frenzy.
For a moment he wondered if he would be the first angel to vomit.
Then the unhappy line of tension between Adam’s brows faded, the corners of his eyes crinkled, and he smiled.
“We always seem to end up here, don’t we?” Adam asked as he approached the table.
“It seemed the logical place to meet.” Ren ducked his head and rearranged the food on the table again before taking a seat.
“What’s all this?” Adam asked, taking the seat across from Ren. His morning-rough voice made Ren’s breath catch.
“Breakfast.”
Adam didn’t make a move toward eating and Ren began to fidget. Had he done something wrong?
“If the food isn’t suitable—”
“No, I just didn’t expect it.” Adam pulled out his chair to sit, and the pressure on Ren’s chest eased.
Adam placed his napkin in his lap before cutting into a sugar-dusted waffle and taking a bite.
“Mm. This is good,” he moaned.
The sound was close to those he’d made the night before. Close enough to remind Ren of their fevered kisses and the feel of Adam’s hard cock rubbing against his.
He flushed at the memory of Adam’s mouth on his, of what it felt like to experience passion with another male. It has harder, hotter than anything he’d had with a female, human or angelic, and left him hungry for more of Adam’s kisses.
Ren looked away and began fussing with his own food before he was tempted to lick off the confectioner’s sugar which dusted Adam’s upper lip.
“These are incredible. I had no idea their breakfast menu was so good. I usually just get a coffee to go in the mornings,” Adam said, taking another bite.
“I bought coffee as well.” An eagerness he couldn’t hide or will away colored his words. Guilt reminded him of the Laws he couldn’t escape. He was a seraph. He shouldn’t be so anxious to please. Adam was human and a male. Double the sin, double the damnation.
And yet, Renatus was helpless to resist his lure. Worse still, he had no desire to resist.
He wanted Adam.
If I am to succumb to this temptation, I must do it before the Law is revealed. One time, and never again, or I’ll be banished to Hell.
“You wanted to go shopping today?”
“Shopping? More like treasure hunting,” Adam said, wiping the sugar from his face with a napkin. “Man, this stuff goes everywhere, doesn’t it?”
“So it appears.” Ren couldn’t contain his laugh. “You’ve missed some.”
“Where?” Adam brushed at his cheeks and chin.
“No, it is higher.” Ren pointed uselessly while Adam dabbed around his mouth, completely missing the lingering powder. “No, not there.”
The twinkle in Adam’s eyes gave him away. He was flirting.
Ren stopped in wonder. There wasn’t a seraph or cherub in all the Heavens who would think to play with him. Not even his best friend. Ren was known for being stoic and serious, dedicated to legal and scholarly matters. He simply wasn’t the type one would think to tease in such a manner.
And yet this human was doing just that. Flirting.
“Why don’t you help me?” Adam held out the napkin.
For a long moment, Ren just stared at it. An offer, disguised as a simple paper napkin. He might be a bit obtuse when it came to human interaction, but he couldn’t mistake Adam’s invitation.
The napkin bobbed, dipped, and Adam started to withdraw.
Ren reached out to take it.
The playful light in Adam’s eyes shifted into something hotter, more intense. He put his elbows on the table and leaned close to Ren, waiting. His face dared Ren to go ahead, his eyes begged him not to run away.
No. There would be no running today. Last night Ren had been overwhelmed. Nothing in his existence had prepared him for the feel of male against male, hardness met by hardness. He’d fled. The shock of reality had barely registered through the pleasure and he’d removed himself to the sanctuary of the Heavens.
He’d returned to Adam almost as quickly, shamed by the way he’d abandoned his almost-lover. The manner in which Adam had simply accepted his fears with no anger or frustration, simply a desire to be near, had humbled Ren.
Ren brought the napkin up to Adam’s face. With a tenderness he hadn’t used in thousands of years, he brushed the confectioner’s sugar from Adam’s cheek. He stroked again, this time over Adam’s chin, ridding it of the last vestiges of sugar before moving to the other cheek. There was no sugar here, only warm skin, roughened by a night’s growth of whiskers. The napkin rasped against them as he traced the contours of Adam’s face.
A quiet sigh escaped Adam. His eyes drifted closed and his body relaxed, jaw dropping open.
Ren paused and his breath caught, caged tight in his chest. Had he done that? Had he turned this man into the very picture of sensual abandonment? If Adam were to brush his face, would he look the same?
He pushed the thought away and flicked the napkin over the dusting of white which tipped Adam’s nose.
“Hey!” Adam protested, pulling back with a tight laugh. He took the napkin back from Ren and finished brushing his nose clean.
The moment was broken and Ren could breathe once more.
* * * * *
Ren’s shoulders knotted with tension as he stepped into the store. Stopping just inside the doorway, he looked around, confused. There was no tingle of awareness signaling that something of divine nature might be within these walls. Had something divine been in this building, its power would have called to his and he would have sensed it.
The shop itself was somewhat repulsive, as well. The store was filthy and smelled of Earthly decay, little more than a cheap collection of worn garbage. Dull florescent lighting gave the store a flat, sickly-yellow cast and the avocado-green tile floors had paths of gray grime worn by decades of shoppers.
Ren wrinkled his nose in distaste. How could anything from this place be worth purchasing?
“Where do you want to start?” Adam asked.
“I believe the books are in the back corner. Isn’t that what you were interested in seeing?”
“Ah, yes. Are you coming back with me or do you want to browse a bit?” Adam’s expression was casual, but Ren could feel a low buzz of anticipation coming from him. Adam’s excitement for this treasure hunt was surprisingly endearing.
“I’ll look around first. You go on to your books and I’ll join you.”
Renatus strolled among the aisles, trying to sense if there was anything Heavenly present. He doubted Meela would point them to this store if there wasn’t, but he couldn’t feel anything of power nearby. He stopped occasionally to ex
amine an oddity but everything he found was of Earthly origin.
The scroll was not among these castoffs.
Why then had she sent them here?
He stopped in front of a display of Christmas angels, their wings tattered, their once-white robes yellowed and stained with time and neglect.
An angel damaged by fire caught his attention. Half of its face was unblemished and golden hair hung in a tangled mass over the cheek. The other side of the angel was a charred wreckage. The burned plastic was cracked and scaled and the hair had melted into blackened ropes.
“What game are you playing, Meela?” he asked it in a whisper.
“Cat and mouse, of course.”
He spun around, choking on a gasp of surprise. “What are you doing here?” The proprietor glanced up from her television to give Ren a questioning look. Only then did he realize he could see her wings.
Demon wings. The batlike appendages were too small to allow for flight. Delicate skin stretched over bone, nothing more than a shriveled remnant of the angelic wings she’d once possessed.
If they were visible to him, that could only mean she was invisible to the humans.
She’d come just to torment him.
He turned back to the shabby display with a scowl.
Meela materialized in front of him, perched on the edge of the table, before he could so much as blink.
“Now you didn’t really think I was going to lead him right to it, did you, Ren? Where’s the fun in that? I want to give you plenty of time.” She flashed him a calculating smile.
“Time for what?” Knowing the demoness, he wouldn’t be able to avoid her machinations. He needed to figure out what she had planned before she had him trapped.
“Time to Fall, of course.”
“You speak as if it is a foregone conclusion. This will not happen, Meela. I will not Fall.”
“Of course. The mighty Renatus is above temptation. You cannot be tempted because you know nothing of love. You never did.”
Her words held a hint of a ring, a faint resonance of truth that chilled him. “I have loved. I do love,” he denied.
“Do you? Tell me, angel, when was the last time you visited the welkin?”
The welkin. He was enveloped by a pain so acute he couldn’t breathe. He’d never set wing inside the Heavenly Vault, never once visited a single soul, not even his own daughter’s. How could he? She’d been such a vibrant child. To see her as nothing more than an essence was unconscionable.
No. His child was dead. Gone. The past could not be undone. He could not allow this demon to use Michani to taunt him.
“Your words are half-truths at best. I will not Fall, Meela.”
“You will. Time is ticking away and soon you’ll have to make the choice. Will you go back to Heaven and spend eternity alone? I don’t think so.”
She leaned over the table and cocked her head to one side, her expression knowing. “The flesh holds too much appeal. But the soft, sweet cherubim don’t look as attractive anymore, do they? All sighs and coy giggles. So feminine. So different from Adam. Look at him, Renatus. Just look.”
Ren’s eyes were drawn to Adam. He’d found a treasure of some sort and stood at the counter, paying for his purchase.
Adam turned to him and smiled, blissfully unaware of the demon standing at Ren’s shoulder.
An unforeseen consequence of this trip to Earth hit him, and Ren’s chest clenched in fear. Heaven help him, what had he done? He’d led Meela right to Adam. Ren’s mouth felt dry, his tongue thick as he listened to Meela’s taunts.
“He’s a handsome human, isn’t he? How did it feel last night? His hard, male body against yours, his lips kissing, his hands touching. Did he put his mouth on you or did you suck him off? Did you bend over and let him ram his cock in your tight little angel ass?”
“You have a vile tongue, Philomela.”
The fallen angel recoiled at the sound of her Heavenly name and Ren hesitated. Names held meaning and truth, the essence of what one was. Could she no longer bear to hear the truth of her own name, to be reminded of who she had once been?
She was a friend once, long ago, before Lucifer had seduced her and many others. Before the rift tore the Realms apart and Hell was created. So many good souls, lost forever to damnation. The thought tempered Ren’s anger with sorrow.
“Why do you bedevil me? Surely there are other things which could occupy your time.”
“But nothing so amusing as you, Ren.” The words held a dull resonance. She lied.
“Be gone, Meela.”
“You have no claim to this place. You cannot banish me.”
“No, I cannot. But I can send you from my presence. Leave me now.”
Her face contorted with anger. A sheen of inky scales spread over her skin and her hair darkened, tawny curls giving way to gnarled black ropes. The false beauty of her disguise melted away until only the demon was visible. Then she vanished with a hiss and a flick of her forked tongue.
The damaged plastic angel in his hand wriggled. He looked down to find its features replaced by the demoness’s.
“You can send me away, but I’m not the one you have to watch,” it warned, pointing a clawed finger at him. “The sin within you will be your downfall, and when you give in to it, I’ll be at the gates of Hell to welcome you.”
Chapter Five
The third shop they visited was just across the street from the little café where they’d met. The bistro seating area was full of people taking advantage of the unusually pleasant fall day, just like they had the day before. Had that really just been yesterday? Adam shook his head. More than a little amazed to realize he’d only known the man beside him for a day.
Adam’s heart swelled with something he didn’t want to name as Ren moved to the window. Was he looking for their table? Not the one they’d used yesterday, when the shop was crowded with men and every pair-up was observed and noted. No, that wasn’t the table that mattered. Their table was the one they used last night, when the darkness had given them privacy and kept their secrets. That was the table where he knew he’d fallen.
Renatus already held part of his soul.
The thought that should have warmed him chilled instead. He’d waited so long to find a man with whom everything felt so easy, so natural. A soul mate. Now it had happened. Adam finally felt that heart-deep bond. He should have been happy.
But Ren wasn’t staying.
Tom would call him every kind of idiot if he knew just how hard and fast Adam had fallen in love.
Adam tried to swallow the lump that threatened to suffocate him.
“Are you going to help me look this time?”
Ren turned from the window with a tight smile. “You make it sound as if I didn’t help you look in the other stores.”
“You didn’t. You wandered and joined me when you were done.” His teasing tone seemed to soothe that line of tension between Ren’s eyes. What was he thinking that had him so worried?
“And you found one spot to study and never saw the rest of the stores’ treasures.”
“Ah, but that just gives me a chance to come back and look some more.”
“Do you need an excuse?” Ren asked as he moved away from the window.
“Sometimes we need a reason. What we want and what we will allow ourselves are not always the same.” What excuse did Ren need? If Adam knew, he’d give it to him, then they could move past Ren’s resistance.
“I suppose you are right. Humans rationalize.”
That pensive look was back, marring Ren’s beautiful face. That wouldn’t do at all. Time to offer a distraction.
“Come on. Let’s go see what we can find.” Adam started down an aisle. The back corner looked particularly appealing today. Ren’s hand on his arm stopped him.
“No, not there.” The expression on Ren’s face was strange, almost scared. “Come walk through the store with me instead.”
Adam glanced back at the corner, struck by a strange ce
rtainty that something wonderful awaited him there.
Another look at his companion assured him something wonderful awaited him there as well.
He turned and followed Ren.
“So, what treasures have you found while wandering the other stores?” he asked, picking his way through the crowded displays.
“Angels,” Ren answered, stopping to examine some archaic bit of kitchen equipment.
“Do you collect them?”
“You could say I have an interest. What is this thing?” The item Ren held had a large wooden knob, with long grooves leading the way to a point on one end and a sturdy-looking handle on the other. Adam’s mind was flooded with pornographic images that had him snickering like a twelve-year-old.
“There’s a tag,” he said, fighting back the laughter. “Does it say anything?”
Ren caught the slip of paper between his elegant fingers. “This is apparently a juicer.”
“Oh, yes. That’s one of the best juicers you can buy.”
They turned to face the sturdily built shopkeeper picking her way through the clutter toward them. She moved between the men and took the tool from Ren. Adam did his best to stifle his amusement.
“A juicer? I’ve, ah, never seen one quite like this before.” Adam rubbed a hand over his face to cover his grin.
“Oh, they don’t make them like this anymore, but I promise you, nothing reams out a fruit like this baby.” She brandished it like a sword, thrusting it in front of her and giving it a savage twist.
Adam choked.
“Are you okay, sir?” The shopkeeper stared at him, wide-eyed behind her thick glasses. Behind her Ren bore a similar puzzled expression.
“F-Fine,” he sputtered. He forced a cough and tried to clear his throat.
“If you need anything just let me know.” She placed the juicer on a table and wandered toward the front of the store, throwing a glance over her shoulder as she went.
“I know your mind was not on orange juice, but I think I’ve missed the joke.” Ren picked up the tool once more and examined it with much more speculation in his eyes.
“Maybe I’ll explain later. When we’re alone.” He took the juicer from Ren and they moved on to the next booth, one done up with a Christmas theme. Complete with a decorated tree. The Victorian angel on top caught Ren’s attention and he moved around the tree, craning his head for a better look at it.
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