by Maggie Marr
“What do you mean former?”
“You don’t think I’m going to keep him if he’s screwing you, do you? You are off-limits. Did you not know this? You are my brilliant daughter, not some plaything for Webber Conner to use and abuse and then toss aside.” He took a long gulp of his booze. “And believe me, doll, he will toss you aside, because that’s what agents do. That’s what people in this Industry do.”
“Including you,” I said, my voice low but filled with a heat I didn’t even know existed within me.
“Excuse me?”
“You, Daddy. Isn’t that what you do? The million models, the actresses, the housekeepers…” The final word tripped out of my mouth before I even realized what I’d said.
Daddy stopped just in front of me, booze on his breath, his face red with rage. Anger thrummed off him. “Did you just disrespect your mother?”
“No, Daddy,” I said my tone even and my gaze locked with his. “I think you did. For the past thirty years. I don’t think you, of all people, should have the privilege of dispensing relationship advice. Not to me. Not to anyone.”
“Where is he? Where is this man you think is so important that you’d throw away everything that I’ve given you?”
“You gave me? What are you talking about? Daddy, I gave those grades to myself. I’ve worked for years to get where I am. Your name might have opened doors for Amanda, and Sterling, and Sophia, and Rhett, but your name did not get me the scores on all my tests, or my degrees, or the fact that I am number one in my class. Don’t do this, Daddy. Don’t pretend for one minute that you gave me my success, because I gave that to myself.”
“And now you’re willing to throw it away?” His hand jerked and bourbon sloshed over the edge of his glass. “For Webber Conner? Webzie? The Webz? For fuck’s sake, Ellen. Your value, your brains, just you, why the hell would you settle for anyone in this fucked-up Industry that the rest of your family is in?”
“Because I love him, Daddy. I really do love him.”
“Love? There’s no such thing as love, aside from what you feel for your children. There is lust and there is companionship, and there is loving your kids, but for men? We’re not capable of loving one woman. Don’t you know that by now? After watching me?”
“You don’t love Mama?” I couldn’t help it, my heart hurt with his words. I’d always hoped, even believed, that Mama held a special place in his heart. That she’d managed to carve out a space untouched by his debauchery and sexual addictions.
“I adore your mother. It’s the longest-lasting relationship I’ve had in my life. I do love her, I will love her for forever, but that love that I have for your mother isn’t enough. That kind of love isn’t enough for any man. Don’t you get it, doll? We’re all a bunch of randy pricks who can’t ever be with only one woman.”
His words pounded into my chest. “Then what about Amanda and Sophia and—”
“They’re in love, they’ve made the best matches that they can, but doll—” He reached out and touched my cheek. “Doll, you are so much more than they are. Your future holds everything. You can go anywhere and do anything. With that brain of yours dancing in that head. You can take the Legend name and really make it into something special. You could change the world, save it. Your sisters aren’t ever going to do that. You, doll, can’t be saddled with a man. You need to be free for a very long time so you can concentrate on you and what you want. Your success, the Legend name’s success. Not Webber Connor and Big Boy.”
My breath hitched in my chest.
“Oh, doll, don’t think for a moment every person in town doesn’t know that Webber calls his schmeckel Big Boy and where Big Boy has been.” He sipped his drink. “And Big Boy, babe, has been nearly everywhere.”
I closed my eyes. I’d guessed as much, maybe even feared it, but Webber and I…we had something special, didn’t we? I was angry that Daddy’s words caused doubt to creep into my mind.
“Besides, after the conversation I just had with Jeff at CTA, you’re not going to want to be associated with Webber Connor, because, babe, that guy is going to be persona non grata. Once I’m done with him, he’ll be lucky if he can find a job as a cabana boy. He definitely will not be working in this town.” Daddy’s words slurred and his right eyelid hung down over his eye, a sure sign he was nearing the end of this drunk.
“You’re going to have Webber fired? For dating me?”
“Babe, I’m going to have him pulverized unless…”
“Unless what?”
Daddy’s eyes were suddenly sharp and his gaze narrowed. “Unless you stop seeing him.”
My heart lurched in my chest. “What? What do you mean, stop seeing him?”
“Exactly what I just said doll. You stop seeing him and Webber gets everything he wants. He gets that book series optioned, he gets his partnership, he gets his fast track to being the hottest agent in town, he gets to keep his Mom in the best style imaginable, he even gets to keep me.” Another drink of Daddy’s booze, and then he pointed his glass at me. “But you, he doesn’t get you. And I mean it. Starting this very minute. You don’t call him. You don’t text him. You don’t see him, you definitely don’t fuck him, and the deal is closed. You’re honorable, Ellen. I trust you. You tell me right here, right now, that you’ll stop seeing Webber and he’ll get everything he ever wanted, except you.”
*
Don’t text me. Don’t call me. Don’t ever contact me again. If you ever loved me, Webber, you’ll do exactly what I ask.
Ellen
Chapter 23
Webber
“My brother, how does it feel to be the youngest partner ever at CTA? Pretty damn sweet, right? Especially since you nearly lost it all. Just wait until you get that first paycheck, man, that will cheer you up. Damn, nothing like dollars to make a man feel right with the world.” Jeff slapped me on the back.
I barely felt it. Numb. Completely and totally and utterly numb. For a week I’d done what she wanted. My gut churned. My sleep disappeared. I showered, but only because I had to go to the office. The office was the only thing that kept me from locking myself in my house, and if I locked myself in my house, who would check on Mom? So two things. There were two things pulling me along, dragging me into the world. One was the responsibility to my clients the other was the fact that I loved Mom.
And hope.
Was there hope?
Could there be?
No. He’d gotten to her. He’d threatened her. Steve-o had convinced Ellen that I wasn’t worthy of her and really there wasn’t a whole lot of convincing to be done. Even I knew that I wasn’t worthy of Ellen Legend. No one was worthy of Ellen Legend, at least no one that I knew and especially not me. Maybe some guy who fixed the environment and saved the seals from dying, but not me, an agent schlepping scripts and selling actors and making movies.
“Boss, this just came for you.” Dick Munch skirted into my office with a giant bouquet, a box of cigars, and a magnum of Veuve.
“From?” I couldn’t even get excited. Would I ever get excited again? I felt dead inside, utterly and completely dead.
“Steve,” Dick Munch said. “Want me to get him on the line?”
“Nope.”
Dick Munch’s eyebrows creased. What I really wanted to do was throw the magnum against the wall, rip up the fucking flowers, and stomp on the Cohibas.
“Okaaay.” He glanced from me to Jeff.
“Dude, you need to tell me which office you want on the partner floor. We’ve got two. Go pick out your real estate and then call Kelly so she can start decorating your digs.”
“Right,” I said. There was no joy in Mudville because the mighty Webzie had struck out. Or the fucking biggest man in the Industry had won and gotten just what he wanted, his daughter focused on school and not on a low-life agent like me.
“Okay, man, partnership meeting next week. See you there.” Jeff pointed two fingers at me like pistolas and exited my office.
“That guy is
a complete douche,” I muttered under my breath.
“That guy just multiplied your salary by ten,” Dick Munch said.
“Bullshit, okay. I did that. With my work and my client list and all this fucking bullshit that I deal with every damn day. I’ve devoted my fucking life to this place. I did this.” I slammed my hand into a pile of scripts and they slammed against the wall.
“Dude, okay. Whatever. Take a Xanax. These are high-class problems. You’ve wanted this partnership for years. What the fuck, man? You finally get what you want and now you don’t want it?” Dick Munch slammed out of my office.
Fuck yeah. Because there was someone I wanted more.
Ellen
“Dr. Kazowski has reconsidered her stance.” Dean Talbot sat behind her desk and handed me a piece of paper. My eyes skimmed the words. This was a glowing recommendation from Dr. Kazowski. My surgery rotation had ended a week before, and not on a good note, Kazowski riding my ass to the bitter end.
“What? Why would she do this?” I squinted at Dean Talbot.
“She’s reached out to John’s Hopkins in Maryland. She believes that will be the best fit for you as far as a surgical residency. Of course official matches won’t take place until next year, but I do believe that once you interview and with your exemplary academic record, and my recommendation and Dr. Kazowski’s, that you should receive a match from one of the top five programs in the country.” A smile spread over her face. “Congratulations, Ellen, your hard work did pay off.”
I reread the words on the letter of recommendation. It was if Kazowski was writing about someone completely different. Not me, not after how she’d treated me and what she’d said to me and about me for the past three months.
“I…I don’t know what to say.”
“There’s nothing to say.” Dean Talbot stood from behind her desk and wrapped her arm around me. “Congratulations. You are the pride of our program. I knew you could work through the challenges that were facing you to get what you wanted. I knew it. And you did. You absolutely did.” We walked to her office door and out into the hall.
“Congratulations, you got exactly what you deserved.”
Dean Talbot’s words rang in my ears as I walked down the hall and away from my office. This victory felt hollow. Why had Kazowski changed her mind? What caused her to write this glowing letter of recommendation? To reach out to her contacts on my behalf at the premiere surgical residencies in the country? And why wasn’t I happier about this victory? Wasn’t this what I wanted? What I’d worked for my entire life? What I had sacrificed to have? All I’d ever wanted was to be a surgeon…wasn’t it?
I walked out into the brilliant sunlit Los Angeles day with a weight in my gut, a sadness in my chest. No. No this wasn’t the only thing I wanted. My desires had changed and I wanted something else…someone else. I slipped on my sunglasses and pulled my phone from my bag. No e-mails. No texts. No calls. I hit my contact list, and for the millionth time in the past two weeks, my finger hovered above the green button on my phone which would ring Webber. I closed my eyes. I couldn’t be this selfish. I wouldn’t be this selfish. I’d made a promise to Daddy and I’d made that promise because I couldn’t be the reason for Webber’s banishment from the Industry that I loathed but he loved. No. I put my phone back into my bag, my heart heavy with all that I’d attained and all that I could never have.
Webber
“What the hell is wrong with you, man?”
I looked up from my computer screen. I’d reread the last line a dozen times and still didn’t comprehend the contract for a client that I’d been trying to read before sending the document to him to sign. My mojo was lost.
“Dillon, bro, what’s going on? We meeting today?”
He walked over and gave me a manshake and a pat on the back.
“Dude, I’ve been on your call sheet for two days. That’s not like you?”
My call sheet was out of control. I had like two hundred calls to return and a couple to my top clients. Not good. Not good at all. I returned calls. I returned them fast, one of the things my clients loved was that I was always there for them. Always.
Dillon looked around my new partnership digs with the wall of windows and the plush interior.
“Nice digs, man.” He walked toward the windows and looked out at the view, then settled onto the couch. “Your mom okay?”
I nodded. “Actually, she’s doing pretty good. You heard about the slug fest?”
Dillon nodded. “No wonder you’re so tough.”
“She wasn’t ever that way before she got sick. Tough lady, yes, but never a bantamweight contender before now.” My joke fell flat. There was no feeling behind my humor anymore. No real desire to make anyone else laugh, because the laughter in my soul was dead. Gone forever, I guessed. Abandoned ship when I lost Ellen.
Dillon relaxed onto the sofa in my office. His gaze locked onto me. “So what are you going to do about the problem?”
“Problem?” My belly jolted. I stood and walked to the chair across from the couch. I sat across from Dillon. “What problem?”
“The Ellen problem.”
My jaw dropped open. Ellen and I hadn’t discussed our relationship with anyone, but of course her close circle of family and friends, which also happened to be the biggest portion of my client list, knew the dealio about us. How could they not? We thought we’d been sly, but obviously not sly enough.
“Dude…” I stopped talking. What the hell could I say? There was nothing to say. I sighed. “She made it pretty clear she doesn’t want to hear from me.”
“Right.” Dillon eased back against the cushions of the couch. “And that’s enough for you?”
“Dillon, man, not everyone gets the fairy-tale happy ending like you and Lane.”
“Do you know why she sent you that text?”
“I have my suspicions.”
“And they are?”
“Daddy-o got to her. Threatened to take away her life, shut her out. Hasn’t he pulled that stunt with all his kids?”
Dillon nodded. “I think so. Did it with every one of them. Ellen was the last. Jeez, hope I’m never that big of an asshole of a father.”
“Well, you’re not sporting two families at once, so pretty good so far.”
Dillon smiled at my comment. I didn’t have a smile to give back to him.
“Wasn’t just about her,” Dillon said. “That text, from what I know, was also about saving you.”
My heart jolted. “What the hell?”
“He was going to pulverize you. Make an example. You know, her promise got you these swank digs.”
I closed my eyes. Of course. I’d guessed that Ellen had caved to Steve’s pressure for her own benefit but hadn’t figured out that not only had she saved herself but she’d negotiated on my behalf.
“That doesn’t work for me.”
“I knew it wouldn’t,” Dillon said. “Don’t get me wrong, I love the guy. He’s been good to me, good to my career, but dude, I’m not down with blackmail.” He shook his head and a grin covered his face. “Especially where true love is concerned.”
The old Webzie would have raked Dillon over the coals for such a sad-sap comment. But I wouldn’t, not now, not ever again, because I knew for a fact that while it might be a man’s world, my world wasn’t anything without a certain woman in it.
I jumped from the chair. “I gotta go.”
Dillon nodded. “Godspeed, my brother. This won’t be good.”
“Nope,” I said. “But it will definitely be worth it.” I grabbed my jacket and my keys and hustled to the door.
“Yo, Webz.”
I turned to my client and my friend. “Dude, I’ve talked to the guys—Trick, and Ryan—and no matter what Steve thinks he can do to you? We’re not leaving. Got it? We’re with you, no matter what Steve Legend decides.”
Damn. Dillon couldn’t have changed my mind even if he’d told me he was leaving my ass and signing with a new agent, but these words,
this loyalty, bolstered me. Made me feel gladiator strong.
“Thanks, Dillon.”
“Dude, us female-whipped fellas got to stand strong, because there isn’t anything sweeter than true love.”
*
I found Steve lounging poolside. He was reading scripts, old school, paper and printed words. I kept on my sunglasses and sat down on the chair across from him.
“Webber.” His voice was cool. His gaze met mine. “Congratulations on your promotion. I hear you’re the newest partner at CTA.”
“I am.” I pulled at the knot of my tie and leaned back in the chair. “For now.”
Steve’s eyebrow bounced up and his eyes narrowed.
“Not certain what will go down after we talk.”
“Then let’s not talk,” Steve said, his voice cool with a warning tone.
“Oh, we’re going to talk. In fact, Steve, we should have talked weeks ago. Actually, it was seventeen days, sixteen hours, and thirty-three minutes ago that we should have talked.”
The color drained from Steve’s face. Oh yeah. Booyah. I was on a roll and I was going to get through this conversation with Steve and then find my love.
“Webber, you are treading in dangerous territory.”
“Am I? I am. You’re right. Because when love is involved, it’s always dangerous. At least I know that now.” I leaned forward and clasped my hands together. “Here’s the thing, Steve. I love Ellen and she loves me.”
“Ha! Really, Webber? You think my daughter would fall in love with someone like you? My Ellen? She’s a bit too smart for that.”
“She is smart, Steve. Smarter than you or I or any of us in the biz will ever be, but she does love me, and I love her and I intend to marry her. Soon. Now. Today if she’d let me.”
His face flamed red, and I could feel that a roar was building in his chest. I braced myself for the onslaught of words, the temper, the rage. Hell, the guy might actually beat the living shit out of me. He was a cardiac patient, so I guessed I could run faster than him…which seriously in about thirty seconds I might have to do.