by West, T J
I can see from his expression he wants to take me himself—that inner alpha again. “You going to be okay?” He asks.
“Yes, I’ll be fine,” I try to reassure myself, even though I’m a bit apprehensive about my appointment. “I’m actually going to go into the studio after my appointment. . . . catch up on what I’ve been missing. I have a lot to do.”
He cocks his head to the side. “You think it’s best you go back so soon?”
Awww, he’s just too cute. I love how protective he is of me. “I’m going a little crazy being stuck in bed. I need to get out . . . get my life back on track. I promise to take it easy.”
He gently brushes the pad of his thumb across my bottom lip and studies it, then meets my eyes again. “I can come by tonight? Cook dinner?”
I nod and smile for him. “Yeah. Sure. I’d really like that.”
He kisses me again and quickly slips his tongue inside. Mmmm, heaven. Just as quickly, he unlocks our lips. No, no, no. . . . don’t leave my lips just yet. “See you later then,” he promises.
“Bye,” I sigh.
Then he leaves. Man, I cannot wait for tonight!
My appointment went fine. I wasn’t all too thrilled to be there, but I got it out of the way and survived. The doctor told me that losing the baby had nothing to do with having sex—I wondered about that. I’m glad that wasn’t the reason. She also gave me the clear and said I was looking good, but I couldn’t have sex for four more weeks, (ugh) and I could resume back to work—just what I had intended on doing. I couldn’t wait to get away from the hospital, just being there brought back the distraught feelings from two weeks ago. Afterward, my mother dropped me off at the studio; I gave her a hug, thanked her for everything and promised we’d get together for dinner soon.
The minute I walked inside my studio I felt at home again. Damn, I missed this place. Monica greeted me and surprised me with a big box of chocolates. That girl was reading my mind! I devoured the chocolates the second my ass hit my office chair.
Holy Hell, I had a shit load of stuff that needed be done, how was I ever going to catch up? Might need to bring my work home. I picked up another piece of chocolate and got to work.
Before I knew it, it was almost 5 o’clock.
Damn, where did the time go? I text Phillip to let him know I was going to be late for dinner. He responds back with the same exact thing, and then offers to pick me up before eight. So friggin’ sweet!
A knock on my office door interrupts my little thoughts about Phillip. In comes Faith. “I shouldn’t be surprised you’re here,” she sweeps in with a big smile on her face. God, my girl is HOT. Love her new tattoo, her new colored hair, which by the way is now purple. Lucky is going to shit himself when he gets a look at her.
“You know me, nothing can keep me away,” I say as I get to my feet, and reach for Faith’s hug.
She plants her hands on her hips, looking me up and down, “You look good. Healthy,” she states.
I sit back down and fold my arms over my chest. “Thanks. I feel pretty good.”
Faith lands her butt on the edge of my desk. She suddenly frowns. “I’m sorry if I haven’t been around a lot this week.”
I wave a hand. “Faith, you have a life, I understand that. Not everything revolves around me.”
“But still—“
“Look, you have done everything for me, put your life on hold for me, so give yourself a break and just know that I love you. You’re the best and I thank you for being there for me . . . and for Phillip.”
I couldn’t have asked for a better best friend.
She shakes her head and pulls her brows together. “You’re going to be okay,” she realizes.
I slowly grin. “That I am.” I shrug, “I have to be. I have my whole life to have babies. It’s just not going to happen right now.”
Faith gets to her feet and kneels before me; her voice breaks and comes out as a whisper, “You’re amazing, you know that?”
I close my eyes, trying hard not to cry. Instead I take a deep breath and gather my bearings. “No I’m not. I’m just being realistic. I have a good life—filled with people who I love—who love me. I have a career that I am blessed with. Nothing makes me more happy than being right here. It’s a dream.”
Without my friends, family and career, my life would end up in shambles.
“And Phillip? What’s going on with you two?”
I look down, grinning, like I have some sort of secret I’m hiding, but in fact it’s just thinking about him makes my heart beat faster. Talking about him is a different matter; he makes me feel things I’ve never felt with anyone. I love the way he wants to take care of me, or how he bosses me around—yet in a loving way. He’s not an asshole anymore, instead he’s a complete alpha gentleman. I seriously cannot wait to see him. “We’re. . . . we’re good. We’ve decided to start fresh. Get to know one another. In fact, he’s coming by to pick me up. He’s making me dinner.”
“I am so happy for you. I really am.” She pulls me into her arms and squeezes me tight. I squeeze back.
“So,” I clear my throat before I start to bawl. I don’t want to have red puffy eyes when Phillip comes by. “I need to tell you something.” I lead Faith over to the loveseat I have across from my desk. Faith looks at me with suspicion. I’ve been thinking a lot of about her and Lucky and his tour. It’s going to be so hard seeing her leave, however those two need to be together. “I give you permission to go on tour—right now—this week.”
Faith blinks with absolute surprise and stumbles upon her words. “June-bug, I can’t this week—“
“Uh, but you are,” I interrupt.
She scoffs and shakes her head, confused. “What are you saying?”
I pat her hand. “Here’s the thing. . . . you were only going to visit for a week, which I don’t think is long enough. . . . you should be there for the rest of the tour.” Faith is looking at me like I am crazy. Maybe I am, but the crazier the better. I continue, “Your mother could take over until you get back. Plus you have Harmony who can be a manager. It’s a win win. Just sayin’.”
She gasps, like she never thought about having her mother take over. “You really think so?”
“Hell yes!” I laugh. “You know you want your mother to stay here permanently, now is the time to settle it. Besides, I already called her and told her.” Faith gasps again. I laugh, “Go talk with her. Now!” I grab her hand, leading her off the couch and usher her toward my office door. I don’t let her get a word in and continue my lecture. I place both hands on her shoulders, biting my lip to keep my emotions in tact. “You need to go be with Lucky. Don’t hold off any longer,” I pause and choke on my last words. “I’ll miss you of course, but it’s the right thing to do.” A tear escapes both our eyes as we pull each other in for a hug. I know it’s only for a few months, but the thought of not having Faith close by is going to be torture. I love her and think of her as the sister I never had.
“You’re the best,” Faith whispers in my ear.
“Lady, that is no news to me,” I jokingly laugh. I suck in my tears and push her out the door. “Now get!”
“I love you!” She shouts as she races out of the studio.
I shout back, “I love you more!”
As soon as Faith exits my studio I go back inside my office and break down. Fucking hormones!
I HAVEN’T GOTTEN BACK TO normal since the night I fucked myself up with booze. If it weren’t for Faith getting me upstairs to a suite I’m not sure what would have happened. I definitely felt like shit the next morning; I couldn’t go back to June’s looking and feeling the way I did. I had to get my head on straight before I saw her again. I took a couple days to regroup; I apologized to Harmony, for yelling at her when I was at my lowest. I hadn’t realized it was her trying to help, until Faith brought it to my attention. Damn, I was such an ass. I hated myself. I hated feeling and treating people like crap. I just wanted things to go back to normal before we lost th
e baby.
Two weeks of hell really was taking a toll on me. I barely slept, hadn’t eaten—forget about working out, I’ve stopped taking care of myself, letting myself go. When I look into the mirror all I see is an overtired, pathetic, and depressed 30 year old man. I needed to get my life back on track.
Virginia kept me up to date on June for the last two days. She said she’s looking great and that I needed to go see her before June started to ask why I wasn’t calling or coming by. I agreed with her. I got my balls intact and did my best to put myself back together.
Virginia was right, June looked wonderful. If only I looked that good. June noticed right off how shitty I appeared. She could see right through me; she questioned if I was being taken care of, she was worried. I told her exactly what was on my mind. Yeah, this whole losing the baby thing was fucking not fair. It devastated me—for both of us. I’d become depressed, and couldn’t deal with the pain. This affected me so much because I finally looked forward to something in my life; a child who would have a part of me inside of him/her. I wanted the baby. So, losing it. . . . there are just no words. Unfortunately it happened and it was time to move forward. I promised her we would have plenty of time to have another baby, but for right now we could get to know one another better. Do normal things—date. I see a future with her, I want to have babies with her . . . I realized through all of this . . . I’m in love with June. I want to be with her and never let her go. Who’d have thought two opposites would attract? In the end, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I want to make June happy tonight. I want to see her smile light up the darkness, and to hear her laughter fill the sad spaces that are lingering inside my heart. It’s been hard losing the baby, but knowing I will be with June I know everything will be okay.
I had an overwhelmingly busy day at the office, so picking up June tonight lightened my mood. One look at her and I almost combusted inside my pants. She had on a small black skirt, red tube top and killer black heels; her once black strands in her hair were now pink—hell, she’s a knockout, I wanted to take her on her office desk, devour her lips, and body. The smell of her was intoxicating and it almost took me over the edge. I had to get her out of the studio. I needed to show her how much I cared for her, loved her. Unfortunately she informed me she couldn’t have sex for another few weeks. Damn, that was going to be torture for me. Yet there are other things we can do to help that department. Hell, I’m ready to do whatever it takes to pleasure her.
I take June back to my place. I already went and got all the necessary groceries needed for dinner. I plan on knocking her socks off; I love to cook, and I love to eat. . . . as I prepare roasted chicken, a white wine sauce and fresh greens I can see she is impressed. Her mouth is almost drooling and I can tell she wants a taste as I stir the sauce. I’ll be nice and let her have a sample.
As I feed her the sauce, her eyes close and she sighs. “Oh. My. God! I think I just had an orgasm.” Holy, fuck me. It’s going to be so hard to enjoy this night without having sex with her.
I jokingly laugh, “You don’t like it?”
She slaps me on the chest as I continue to laugh. “I need to eat, now! That was insanely good, mister!”
Dinner is finally served. Watching June eat, my appetite suddenly comes back. The dark spaces are coming back to life. She makes everything better for me. I can do this. I can get back to living my life, get back to being healthy, and making her happy. I’ll do anything to make June happy.
Throughout dinner we talk about our families, sports—which she hates, dammit. Maybe I can convince her to like ice hockey? I grew up playing hockey; I was on my High School hockey team and we killed the other schools teams, we were that good. If I didn’t love architecture so much I would have been a professional hockey player. I seriously love the sport.
I learned that June used to be a cheerleader—a little hot one I bet. Her parents own a big motorcycle company. They have several of their companies worldwide and her brothers manage a few of them around the states. Also she used to ride with her dad many times growing up.
The more she talks about herself the more I am loving her. I could listen to her talk all night and never get bored; she’s funny as hell, made me laugh and relax during dinner. God, she’s incredible. What the hell was I thinking, not being attracted to her? I must have ruptured a nut back then, because seriously, this woman sitting in front of me is the perfect woman for me. She’s what I need in my life and I want to be everything to her like she is to me.
We finish up dinner and I am completely stuffed.
Holding up her wine glass, finishing off the remains, June asks, “Do you always cook like this? If you do, then you’re spoiling me, because I cook like crap.”
I chuckle. “Yes, I cook like this almost on a daily basis.” I intently focus on her lips, drinking down that wine. Damn, they are plump, red and composing my dick to twitch. “Plus I’m happy to spoil you any day, every day, and every hour.”
“And every minute and second, right? Can’t leave those two out,” she ends on a snort, which I find extremely adorable.
I grin at her comment. “No, you’re right, I can’t.” I retrieve the wine bottle. “More wine?”
“Yes, please,” she accepts, raising her glass so I can pour the wine in. “So what do you have planned for dessert?”
I start to laugh as I pour more wine for myself. “Already? You just stuffed your face with dinner.”
“Doesn’t matter,” she shrugs and takes a sip of her wine. Again, with those lips. She has no idea what she’s doing to me right now, sitting there across from me with her body turned, legs crossed and her arm resting on the back of her chair, all the while holding onto her goblet like it’s some delicate treasure. I imagine that delicate treasure could very shortly be my dick in her hands. “Come on, what do you have for me, boss?” The sexy look in her icy blue eyes when she calls me boss—it screams “Fuck Me!”
I better get myself back in the conversation before I forget about dessert. She seems to love her sweets, and I sure do love a woman who can eat. “Homemade ice cream?” I answer.
“Get out!” she slams her hand on the table. “Seriously? Doesn’t it have to sit in the freezer for awhile after you churn it or something?”
I place my elbows on the table and take another sip. “The way I make it, no,” I grin.
She cocks her head to the side with a disappointed pout on her full lips. “Oh no, is it a healthy dessert?”
I burst out into laughter. “Yes, and you’ll love it anyways.”
She twists her lips to the side and comments, “But I like unhealthy desserts.” She’s so fucking cute.
“Trust me, you’ll die for this ice cream.”
As I am gathering the ingredients for the ice cream, June turns on the iPod. Coming back into the kitchen June is swaying her hips, snapping her fingers and is looking incredibly hot. I almost drop everything onto the ground, I want her so bad.
“Can’t make dessert without music,” she explains while she twirls around.
If she doesn’t stop that I am going to forget the dessert, instead I’ll arrange her to be the dessert.
I shake my head and resume with my main focus. I immediately recognize the music. “Is that JINKS?”
Nodding her head, dancing she says, “The one and only. They’re incredible.” I guess they’re alright. The night of JINKS’ party I was partially lying to Lucky about not liking their sound. I was being a total ass because I knew he was still in love with Faith and I had just seen them fucking upstairs. I hate reliving that memory, because it still stings. I knew in that moment it was the end of us. On the other hand, it seems like a lifetime ago, and it was the best thing that could ever happened to me. If it weren’t for Faith and Lucky, there would not have been a June and Phillip. June stops dancing and notices my grin. “Oh, you don’t like this type of music do you?”
I don’t care what music you’re playing, as long as you keep on dancing. Sex
y as fuck.
I shrug, pouring my ingredients in the blender, I placed on the counter. “I have to admit it’s been growing on me.”
“Good, cuz I am not turning it off,” she retorts back.
“Smartass,” I chuckle. She’s so funny.
She hops her ass onto my counter and swings her legs up and down like a young kid. How innocent she looks right now, yet how devilish she really is. “What music do you like?” She takes a strawberry from my stash of ingredients and starts sucking on it. Crap, did she really have to do that?
I clear my throat and proceed with the ice cream. “Jazz, Opera -” I cut myself off when I see a look of horror in her expression. I immediately drop what I’m doing and go directly in front of her. She notices that she’s in big trouble when I spread apart her legs and pull her close to my chest. I slip my hands up her skirt, inside her panties and pinch that phenomenal ass of hers. She gasps and squeals from the pinch. This woman loves a good pinch. “You are going to get spanked for doing that,” I huskily promise. This time. . . . .she’s going to get that spanking.
She hasn’t taken a bite of the strawberry; she keeps a hold on it between her fingers and seductively replies, “Another spanking threat huh? You like making them just for the thrill, don’t you?”
I reach for the strawberry with my mouth and take a bite. “No threat beautiful, no threat at all.” I chew on the strawberry while we intently look into each others eyes. She copies my movements and slowly takes a bite off the berry. My tongue urgently licks off the juice coming down from her lips. Tastes so much better on her skin, I could lick her all day. I squeeze her ass as I move my tongue down until I reach her neck, to the base of her throat. I can feel her heart racing against my tongue and hear the soft moans coming from within. She moves her hand into my hair, pulling on the strands as I continue to lavish her delicate, amazing neck. I want to take her to my bed right this instant.
In a high, breathy pitch, June comments, “Opera? Really? Couldn’t you have liked Country instead?”