by Vic Tyler
Rubbing the back of his neck, Damien smiles faintly. “Jura left that here.”
I startle. “What?”
He prods the ground with his black boot, and when he looks at me, his expression neutralizes before he nods for me to put the game console down.
When I do, he says, “His brother.”
Chills filter down my spine, and I stumble away from where we were just standing.
In a smooth glide, Damien catches me before I trip over a tree root, and he gently nudges me out of the clearing. “Let’s go.”
In a detached, brief explanation, Damien explains that Jura and his brother, Yevo, were both in the Blood Trials together but that Yevo didn’t survive. He doesn’t offer any other information, and I don’t ask for more.
I’m too shocked by everything I learned.
Everything’s starting to register. And become real.
Kids actually die in the Blood Trials, and they’re buried up here with no grave markers or anything.
I can’t feel the tips of my fingers, and even as we walk through the forest, my mind is still scouring the clearing in my memory.
How far did the dirt–trodden clearing go? It wasn’t too large, which makes sense because it was probably dug up more recently.
But it’s not like grass takes a long time to grow, and there was definitely grass on top of Yevo’s grave.
The thought makes me nauseous, and I can’t talk for fear of crying or throwing up. I don’t even realize we’re at the mansion again until Damien hops the fence and helps me over it.
We don’t speak another word, but Damien walks me to my room. He doesn’t look worried, but he watches me carefully before saying goodbye.
My large and empty room feels large and empty.
Yet it’s suffocating and too hot. Even my clothes feel like they’re glued to my skin.
So many kids like me are buried by that brook in the forest.
My fingers are trembling, and I clasp my hands together to try to make them stop. I tried to hide it as best I could from Damien, and I don’t think he noticed.
For once, I’m terrified of being here. And being alone doesn’t help.
But I don’t want everyone to keep seeing me as a little kid.
Maybe if I grow up faster, I won’t have to worry about being buried like them.
As I lie in bed, I squirm around, my feet itching helplessly.
I haven’t been able to get the brook out of my mind.
Graves all along the water and trees. Bodies. Skeletons. Rotting away.
And I was stepping on them.
My feet itch helplessly, and no matter how much I claw at them, the feeling won’t go away.
Shadows from the fireplace flicker all around the room, and faces on the walls stare back at me.
Rolling onto my side, I try to contain the shivers wracking my body.
I have to close my eyes, but I can’t.
The ghosts swirl on my eyelids, and they won’t go away.
The patterns on the rug start moving and coming alive, and I swear I see it tremor like something’s trying to come out.
The room is too dark.
Black corners everywhere, swallowed by the shadows, dead things lurking in them, waiting for me to sleep so they can escape.
My heart races, and I scramble out of bed, nearly tripping over myself as I run to the door.
My pulse is deafening, and I feel like something’s going to grab my ankles at any moment.
The door won’t open.
Fear chokes me. I want to scream for help, but no sound comes out.
Shaking the doorknob violently, it finally turns, and I throw myself out.
The hallway is still brightly lit, and it gives me a little relief.
I slam my door closed and run to the opposite wall, curling into a ball, only slightly comforted in the flood of light around me.
I’d dragged my blanket out in an attempt to shield myself from whatever was hiding in the dark. Thankfully. It’ll make the night a little more comfortable.
Wrapping the blanket tighter around me, I bury my face between my knees.
I’m not unused to sleeping on the ground, although I haven’t done it in a while. It’s fine.
“Adriana?”
I look up to find Damien walking down the hallway, frowning. “What are you doing out here?”
I shrink into my blanket as he approaches, his tall frame steadily towering over my curled pose. He kneels, looking more confused than anything.
In a quiet voice, I mumble, “I was scared.”
He studies my face. “Of what?”
I keep my eyes glued to my knees.
I don’t want to tell him it’s because of the stories he told earlier today or the field of corpses we were on.
An involuntary shudder wracks my body at the thought.
Aftera few moments of silence, he finally rises to his feet.
I’m a little embarrassed he caught me, but once he leaves, I’ll stay out here for a little longer before going back inside and trying to sleep.
I dread the thought of returning to the dark, but I don’t want other people catching me outside either.
What luck. Normally no one’s around here, but already, Damien found me. He always finds me.
“Come on. Get up.”
My face darts up. “You’re too scared to sleep alone, right?”
I slowly nod, and he jerks his head towards the other end of the hallway. “Let’s go.”
My heart pounds as I slowly rise to my feet.
Part of me feels like I should stop being a wimp and go back to my room, but part of me wants to follow him. The part of me that trusts him. I don’t know why I do, but I like Damien. He makes me feel safe.
My small bare feet pitter patter behind his long strides.
“Why are you in this part of the mansion?” I ask curiously.
“I was at the hospital wing to ask Isla a few things,” he responds. “She got distracted with some of her lab experiments, so it took a while to get the answers I needed.” He pauses. “It’s a good thing I came this way.”
I nod. “She collects finger bones.”
He laughs loudly, and it fills the dead silent hall with a strange warmth. “I’m not surprised. She’s hella creepy.”
“She’s nice,” I protest.
“But creepy,” he insists with a grin.
“And she’s smart,” I argue.
“Still creepy.”
I huff, and he laughs again, filling me with a tingly feeling.
Some of the fear and nerves stringing my body taut releases, and I feel like I can breathe more easily.
“She’s not that bad,” he relents. “Can we agree on ‘weird’?”
I nod, and he smiles, making me smile too.
To my surprise, we head towards the west wing. After entering the double doors, he leads me down a long hallway I’ve never gone down before. He explains this is the quarters where the Twelve live and sleep.
He said that some of them live outside the complex in their own houses, but a lot of them choose to live here since they don’t have to worry about bills and food.
He chuckles again, and I almost wonder if something’s wrong with him because he’s been laughing so much today. Maybe he’s still drunk.
I blink when Damien knocks on one of the doors and Kitty answers, dressed in a silky negligee that makes my heart jump in scandalized surprise.
Damien scowls. “Put some clothes on.”
Kitty tilts her head, studying me curiously. “Why?”
He glances at me before looking at her again. “Can you let her sleep with you tonight? I got her spooked earlier, and I found her trying to sleep in the hallway.”
My face flushes. This is too embarrassing. They probably already think I’m being a big baby.
“It’s okay,” I mumble. “I’ll go back to my room.”
Before I can turn, Damien’s hands rest lightly on my shoulders.
&nbs
p; “Come on,” he urges. “It’s better than having nightmares.”
Kitty’s lips curl into a smile, and she leans against the doorway with her arms crossed. Her boobs push up and jiggle. “How come you don’t sleep over more often then, Damien?”
His touch stiffens, and when I try to look back, his hand comes down and ruffles my hair, mussing it into a tangled curtain in front of my face.
Without missing a beat, Damien says to me lightly, “If you don’t like her, we can go find Hilda.”
Kitty snorts. “That woman snores loud enough to wake the whole damn house.”
Staring at my feet, I shuffle awkwardly.
I don’t want to impose on Kitty. As much as I like her, the thought of sleeping next to her kind of scares me. Not to mention, she’s dressed in almost nothing.
“How about if Damien sleeps with us?” Kitty purrs.
Even without looking, I know Damien’s scowling.
But the idea puts me at ease a little bit. I wouldn’t want to sleep with him alone or with Kitty alone, but if it’s with him and Kitty…
I nod, and something vaguely threatening radiates into my back.
Kitty tilts her head and pouts. “Not going to help poor Adriana out, Damien?” She sighs. “I guess you can risk putting her next to Hilda, but I doubt she’ll get any sleep.”
“Fine,” he grits. Then, he sighs wearily. “Let me get changed, and I’ll be back.”
He disappears into another room a few doors down.
Kitty motions for me to come in. Her room is large with a four–poster bed, just like mine.
Expensive clothes and shoes are strewn all over the floor, and every surface is cluttered with makeup or jewelry or a million other shiny things. Some of which are guns and knives too, I’m pretty sure.
I’m busy staring in awe at all the things to notice that Damien returned. He’s dressed in a t–shirt and shorts, and he makes Kitty change into something else too.
Now, she’s wearing a tight tee that emphasizes her boobs even more and really short shorts.
I blush when I see her nipples, but she doesn’t seem to notice they’re showing. I roll my eyes when I see Damien staring at them.
Kitty jumps into bed, and Damien ushers me first before following.
“Aww, aren’t you going to sleep next to me?” Kitty purrs.
He glares at her. “I don’t trust you to keep your hands to yourself.”
She laughs, and it’s the prettiest laugh I’ve ever heard. High, light, and tinkly. “I don’t need my hands.”
“Exactly,” Damien mutters, pulling the covers up.
I shrink into the pillows, feeling stiff between these two.
“Are you sure you don’t want to sleep next to your girlfriend?” I ask quietly.
He stares incredulously at me, and Kitty laughs. Her slender arm suddenly wraps around my waist as her body curls up against my back. She nuzzles her face into my hair.
“Little girls are so cute,” she exclaims. “They’re so small.”
I blink, feeling the skin around my eyes stretch widely as I freak out.
Damien shakes his head. “She’s not my girlfriend.”
Kitty purrs, and her breath is soft and smells minty. “How would you describe our relationship?”
He scowls. “There are lots of other names for it.”
“But when two people like each other, they become boyfriend and girlfriend.” My anxiety creeps up on me as I look at them. “They kiss and hug and spend time with each other because they like each other, right? That’s what mama and papa told me.”
I learned about sex by myself, and even though it’s so naked and intimate, I know firsthand that you don’t have to be someone’s girlfriend or boyfriend to do that.
But I’ve never slept next to any of the men that had me and never held their hands. And when they kissed me, I’m sure it didn’t look like how Damien and Kitty kiss. Because I know for sure I never smiled or laughed.
They do it because they like each other, not because they’re paying for something they shouldn’t have.
Damien looks to me, then Kitty, and back to me before he sighs and faces the ceiling.
“Sure, you can call her that.” He grumbles and turns over. “Now go to sleep.”
I snuggle back, feeling incredibly warm and secure. Kitty’s body is wrapped around me under the blanket.
No matter what, I know Damien will keep me safe. He’s the one who’s always been there for me. Finding me, even when I didn’t want to be found, and saving me, helping me, rescuing me, no matter how much I didn’t want it.
He grumbles and complains, but I know he’ll never let anything bad happen.
And in a weird moment before I drift off to sleep, I drowsily think that I’d always like to be here right next to him.
Forever.
chapter sixteen
Kitty and I stay awake as Adriana’s breathing evens out.
She finally looks at ease in Kitty’s arms, not curled up into herself or peering out of terrified eyes.
Seeing her like that in the hall gave me an image of what she must’ve looked like when she lived on the streets all by herself, alone and frightened.
It was such a natural reaction for her that it scared me too. And nothing really scares me nowadays.
I shouldn’t have led her out to the mass graves. I don’t know what I was thinking.
Of course, most people would find the whole thing fucking horrifying, but it’s simply reminiscent for me.
Most of the Blood Trial survivors visit the graves at least once after we ‘graduate.’
Why? I’m not sure.
For me, it’s a reminder that my body could’ve been there. That I spent hours shoveling those plots, not knowing if I was literally digging my own grave.
It’s nostalgic more than sentimental since that’s where I spent a lot of my time before becoming a deviant.
For people like Jura, of course it’s sentimental.
Going through the Blood Trials with your twin brother, not really understanding that eventually one or both of you will die, is an endeavor of the naive and foolish.
But they were kids. Of course they were naive and foolish.
I still remember seeing the both of them when I first joined. It was the last year that Jura was there before becoming a full–fledged deviant.
Everyone thought that stronger, sturdier, and more commanding Yevo would survive out of the two.
Jura was the odd one out of the group, always. He liked sticking by his gadgets and electronics.
But they were glued together at the hips. Yevo was the one who stuck up for Jura when everyone else picked on him. ‘Bullying’ is the nice way of referring to what happened.
But no matter Jura’s skill set and technological talent, a durable body and unmatched fighting capability are necessary to advance in the organization.
All he ever beat his brother at was his speed. He always was good at running away.
That’s also why he survived.
Most people figured they’d be pitted against each other sooner or later. After all, having any sort of attachment isn’t allowed in the organization, and the twins were too close for anyone’s comfort.
But they were bypassed for a long time since they were twins. Identical ones. Clones in appearance but opposite extremes in temperament and talent, although they were both equally capable in what they were good at.
Maybe it’s an innate biological thing where people just realize there’s something inseparable about twins, especially ones as close as Jura and Yevo.
But it wouldn’t have been long until one might’ve killed the other. Even if they both survived, their relationship wouldn’t have.
No one suspected that things would end the way they did.
“What’cha thinkin’ ‘bout?” Kitty purrs.
Staring up at the ceiling, I slowly fade back into the present from my deep reverie.
I normally don’t think this hard abou
t things, but being with Adriana always makes me question what my life’s become.
“The mass grave by the brook.”
“Oh. Boring.” Kitty sighs in disappointment, her long finger twirling a lock of Adriana’s dark brown hair. She peers curiously at the sleeping girl. “Is that why she’s here?”
I don’t answer, and Kitty grins. “Oh, so you took her. Did you tell her how it’s a haven for missing child cases?”
I scowl. “No, but I said enough, and her imagination went with it.” Shifting my arm under my head, I adjust myself. “She probably thinks it’s worse than it is.”
It’s likely the other way around. I’m sure there are things she can’t possibly even imagine happening to those kids, and the truth would make her run away screaming.
Maybe Jura was right. Maybe we should just tell her the truth and let her run.
But I can’t bear the thought of giving her any more scars, even if they’re ones I can’t see. She’s been through enough hardships, lived thoroughly through her own horrors. She doesn’t need to deal with any more pain.
“Uh huh.” Kitty doesn’t believe me, obviously. She’s seen it all firsthand. Experienced it herself. Makes me wonder who I’m trying to convince by saying all these lies aloud. “And is that what’s got you so down?”
I know she’s teasing, but it still sours my mood.
The implication is there. That the reason is the little person lying between us.
Seriously, why the hell am I even here?
I’ve slept in the same bed as Kitty only a handful of times. Usually when we’re short on accommodations while we’re out on an assignment or if we’ve fucked ourselves into an exhaustive oblivion.
For one thing, I don’t want anyone to deal with my nightmares, and honestly, I have trouble controlling myself when I’m asleep.
Even for someone as capable as Kitty, she had a hard time waking me up the one time she witnessed it. After that, I stopped sleeping around other people when I could help it.
It’s gotten better over the years, but I still don’t trust myself.
Besides, Kitty and I are good about keeping boundaries. Usually.
Yet, here I am.
Lying in bed with her and a kid.
Jesus, this is too domestic for my taste.