Just my damn luck, I see Brady. It’s too late to hide anything. He looks in my cart.
“Okay. I’m confused. Pregnancy test and tampons? Shouldn’t it be one or the other?” he asks with a laugh. Shit. SHIT. SHIT.
“Brady, please don’t say anything. Please,” I plead panicked.
“Hey, my lips are sealed. I promise. You in trouble?” he asks. I believe him and immediately feel better.
“No, I’m good. Thanks,” I say then go to checkout and rush out of the store.
I speed down the highway. I’m so thankful that traffic is never bad here. I get to the apartment in less than five minutes. As I pull into the apartment, I slam on the breaks, jump out of the car, run up the sidewalk, and bust through the front door. I scare the shit out of Kelly. She jumps out of her seat and grabs her chest.
“Oh, my GOD! You scared the piss out of me,” Kelly says.
“Sorry, I need to go to the bathroom,” I say fumbling with the bag. I have to know right now.
“Well, don’t piss on the carpet. Go,” she says.
All of a sudden, I have a need to pee and getting my jeans unbuttoned while doing the pee dance is impossible. Can I just sit down already? After a few seconds, I finally get them down. I quickly rip open the package, remove the stick, and finally sit down to pee.
While waiting, I don’t move. I sit on the toilet and stare at the pregnancy test on the counter. It’s the longest three minutes of my life. What am I going to do? Am I mentally ready for this? I’m getting better, but I’m still unsure of a lot of things. I guess, if this says positive, which I know in my heart it will, then I will have to stay focused on all the positives. Aaron happened and the abuse happened. I can’t change it, but I can grow stronger. I will be stronger. When those three minutes are up, my whole world shifts and a new purpose is born as I read the words: pregnant.
I’m going to be a mom. Maddox is going to be a dad. Knowing Maddox and I created a life makes me emotional. I sit for a few more minutes just thinking about my life and bad decisions. Being with Maddox wasn't a bad decision. It's the best decision I've ever made. Our baby will have parents, who will show them how much they're loved. Just thinking about it, I start crying. I start snorting, trying to catch my breath. Kelly returns the favor of scaring me when she busts through the door without knocking.
“What’s wrong, Kerrigan?” Kelly asks.
I can’t say anything because I am in the middle of trying to catch my breath. I am able to point to the sink, though. I watch as Kelly’s face goes blank.
“Who’s the father?” Kelly asks once she was able to speak.
“Maddox.”
“Noah’s brother? What is it with them knocking up my friends?” she asks with a little humor.
I get up to wash my hands and wipe down the sink. I’m in a daze as I walk into the living room. How do I tell Maddox? Will he be happy? I know he said he loved me. He didn’t want to wear a condom so I guess that means he’d be happy. Should I move back?
I quickly push that out of my thoughts as soon as I remember that I had offered to help with a wedding. This is something I want to see through to the end. I won’t bail on this young couple. I just won’t make any plans until after that wedding. Shit. When is my due date? Will I still be in Kentucky when I have him? Or her? Oh, my gosh. There is a baby in my belly. I move my hand down to my stomach. Kelly interrupts my thoughts.
“You know, I was planning to drive up to Chicago next week. You should go and talk to Maddox,” Kelly says.
“Actually, that’s a good idea.”
Keeping this a secret for a week will be difficult. I want Maddox to know, now. Maddox knows my face more than anyone. So, I will limit our time Skyping.
I spend the next few days in a daze. I can hardly wrap my head around becoming a mother. My life has been cluttered with failures. I’ve pointed the finger at everyone from my parents, ex-boyfriends, and Aaron. I should’ve been pointing to myself especially after leaving home. With my ex-boyfriends, I never really got to know them before sleeping with them. I never had that feeling of love for any of them. So, the fact those relationships ended shouldn’t have hurt. With Aaron, I said yes to that first date because I wanted to move past Maddox. I stayed because he pulled at my heartstrings when he talked about his dad and how he wanted help. Then, of course, I stayed to protect Maddox.
Somewhere along the way, I wish I would’ve opened my eyes and seen that these other people weren’t the issue. It was me. For allowing it all to happen.
I make another promise to myself to think about things before reacting. I need to give people a chance to explain themselves before jumping to conclusions. I need to listen to my gut. I’ve ignored it for far too long.
---
It’s the night before we head to Chicago. Talking to Maddox has been difficult. He has asked a million times if I’m all right. It’s been hard not to just blurt it out. I know I want to be there with him and hold him when I tell him. I haven’t mentioned coming to Chicago yet. I’ll let him know tonight when I call.
Maddox
I just got a frantic phone call from Donna asking me to do security detail at a local socialite’s wedding. Apparently, the security firm she hired went on strike. I called a few buddies from the force, and they were excited to be working this wedding.
On my drive over, I think about Kerrigan. She has been gone a month. I’m worried about her. This week she has been so cryptic. I don’t know what’s going on, but I decide to drive down there in the middle of the week when I have a few days off. I thought she was doing better. She mentioned that she is seeing Jay more and that she is getting better. I know she needs to stay. I love hearing her on her good days; the days she goes on and on about her new friends and the places she gets to see. It makes my heart swell. I know now she is in a better place and I know my visiting won’t set her back.
My phone buzzes. It’s a text from Donna.
Where are U????? 911. - D
Pulling up now. - M
Head straight to the bridal suite. EX G making trouble with bride. - D.
I hop out of the car, and my phone rings. It’s Kerrigan calling.
Damn. I’ve been wanting to talk. I’ll have to make this quick.
“Hey, babe,” I say.
“Maddox, I wanted to tell you I’m coming home tomorrow,” Kerrigan says.
“No, you need to stay there, Kerrigan,” I say.
I look up and see Donna rushing towards me.
“Thank God, you’re here,” Donna says.
“Who is that?” Kerrigan asks.
“Donna,” I say swiftly.
“Okay, I see. Bye, Maddox,” Kerrigan sounds sad.
“I’ll call you back.”
“Don’t bother.”
Dammit. I want to talk but I can’t. I can see shit is hitting the fan as a hair weave was just pulled from the bride’s scalp.
Kerrigan
I slump to the floor and start crying. I’m trying not to jump to conclusions, but it’s hard not to. I thought he’d be thrilled I was coming back. Why would he tell me to stay? Donna was saying she was glad he was there and he sounded rushed. I don’t know what other conclusion to draw. I just rock myself back and forth. As I sit here and cry, words Jay said to me came back to me. What is the positive? This baby. That’s the biggest positive. Even if Maddox moved on, this baby is mine. I will love him and do anything I can for him. I don’t know why I think it’s a boy, but I do. I will give Maddox a chance to explain because another thing Jay tells me is that I jump to conclusions because that’s what people with low self-esteem do. All right, I will give him a chance. I won’t go up tomorrow because he told me not to. I’ll have to find another way to tell him. I start breathing, trying to calm down. Kelly walks through the front door and takes in the sight of me. She immediately comes to my side.
“What’s wrong?” she asks.
“I called Maddox to let him know I was coming tomorrow.”
�
�Okay?” she questions.
“He told me not to come. He was with a girl.”
“I’m going to tie a steak to his balls and sic a black bear on him,” she says pissed.
I start cracking up.
“Do you want me to stay tomorrow? I’m sure Molly would understand,” she says.
“No, you should go. Molly needs help.”
It’s true. Noah, being a doctor and working long hours, has to be hard on her.
Over the next couple of days, Maddox keeps trying to call. I ignore them and send him a text just letting him know I am busy. I know it’s driving him crazy. Heck, it’s driving me crazy.
I’m still upset, though. Hurt.
I want to sort through this before I drop the bomb on him. In my heart, I know there is a reasonable explanation. I know Maddox loves me but I think the issue is that I go back to the self-doubt. Tonight, I will think it over and call him tomorrow.
Maddox
I don’t know what the hell is wrong with Kerrigan but I’m going to find out. I plan on driving down to Kentucky tomorrow. Tonight, Molly made dinner since her friend Kelly is in town. She invited everyone over. It’s the usual group. I have to admit it’ll be nice to see everyone. Still, I should be on the road.
When I walk in the door, Molly rushes over to give me a hug and to introduce me to the greatest friend she’s ever had. I already know I like Kelly because Molly has said so many great things about her.
“Maddox, this is my best friend in the whole wide world, Kelly.”
I smile at Molly’s excitement. I extend my hand to shake hers.
“Hi, Kelly,” I say.
She just rolls her eyes and storms off. Uh, okay. What is going on? I look at Molly, who looks equally confused.
I try to let it go. I know I haven’t done anything to offend her, so I start talking with Brayden and Evan. I guess I found my group for the night. Just like every other night. Men with women problems.
Molly calls us over, and we go sit down next to each other at dinner. People are talking, but I am still trying to figure out Kelly’s reaction to me. Did something happen with Kerrigan? Did I do something to Kerrigan that got Kelly this upset? I decide to try one more time to get Kelly to talk to me.
“So, Kelly, what are your plans while you’re here?” I ask but she completely ignores me. She doesn’t make eye contact. Nothing. Something is wrong. I can see the Kelly that Molly loves because she is talking easily to everyone else. Molly, thankfully, decides to talk. Everyone at the table is staring at both Kelly and me.
“Kelly? What’s wrong?” Molly asks.
“Nothing. My momma told me if you can’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all,” Kelly responds.
Evan and Noah both look at me, and I shrug my shoulders. I have no fucking idea, but I don’t like her attitude.
“You have nothing bad to say about me. I’ve not done shit to you,” I say pissed.
“Oh, you’re right. But, you sure as shit hurt Kerrigan,” Kelly says equally pissed.
Would someone please fill me in? I’m so confused. How did I hurt Kerrigan?
Running over the past couple days and how she has been ignoring me, I look around the table again and now Lani looks pissed at me.
“I swear. I haven’t done anything to hurt Kerrigan,” I say, as way of explanation.
“Oh, yes. He did. Kerrigan called to tell him that she was pregnant and that she was coming home. He told her to stay, and he was with a girl.”
What? I hear several forks drop on plates. My heart starts pounding. My girl is pregnant with my baby? Oh, my god. That’s why she had been cryptic. That’s why she called the night of the wedding. Kerrigan thinks I don’t want her or our baby? I feel a piece of bread hit the side of my head. I look up to a pissed Lani.
“I swear I didn’t know Lani, I didn't.”
“Oh, I believe my best friend. Not you, Maddox. You had me fooled,” Lani says.
I can’t find the words to form them. I’m going to be a dad.
“Maddox, you better start talking if you don’t want to meet your maker,” Evan spouts off.
Yes, each girl at the table is giving me a murderous glare.
I must admit that I am a little scared for my safety. I smile.
“Kerrigan called the other night, but I couldn’t talk. Donna had asked me to do security detail at the Gordon wedding. When she called, Donna was freaking out because an ex-girlfriend of the groom was causing trouble. I told Kerrigan I would call her back,” I explain.
I can see the girls are starting to calm down.
“Then, why would you tell her not to come?” Noah asks.
“I only said that because I had planned on going down there tomorrow. I see and hear the change in Kerrigan. I know she is where she needs to be for the moment but, now, she needs to be with me,” I say.
“Oh, my God. I’m sorry for being such a bitch,” Kelly says.
“Nah, don’t sweat it. And, thank you for defending her that way. Kelly, did you happen to bring the keys to your apartment?” I ask and she smiles.
She gets up and runs to the bedroom. She rushes back to me and places the keys in my hand.
“Leave, right now,” she says.
“I am,” I say getting up.
Before I get out the door, I look back. I see smiles and hear laughing. Today is the first day of my forever.
“Please don’t let her know I’m coming,” I say as I step into the elevator.
Chapter 20
Maddox
I drove all night, and it’s now six in the morning. I let myself into the apartment but decide not to wake her. I didn’t want to scare her by having her wake up with a man in her bed. It’s killing me though. I’ve texted her a couple of times, but she hasn’t responded. I think she’s still ignoring me, so I decide to text her 911. It isn’t but a few seconds later that she responds.
What’s wrong?-- K
Can you check really quick and see if Kelly left her inhaler on the coffee table?-- M
K-- K
As she rounds the corner, she jumps back, startled at the sight of a stranger. It only takes her a second to realize it’s me. Kerrigan is beautiful, of course. Seeing her with bed hair and wearing flannel shorts and a barely-there tank top, is the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.
“What are you doing here?” Kerrigan asks.
“I wanted to introduce myself,” I say.
“To whom?” She asks, looking at me like I’m crazy. I walk over to her and place my hand on her belly.
“To my baby,” I say, as Kerrigan’s eyes grow wide.
“I’m going to kill Kelly,” she mutters.
“Why?” I ask.
“Because that’s something I wanted to tell you, and because I was still trying to sort through how we would work out custody. I wanted to be calm when we spoke.”
What the hell? Custody arrangements?
“What do you mean, work out custody?” I ask.
“I live here, Maddox.”
“That is about to change. You’re having my baby. We’re starting a family.”
“Maddox, you told me not to come. I heard Donna on the phone. I’m upset, and I don’t know what happened, but it hurt to hear you tell me not to come.”
“Kerrigan, Donna is an event planner. I was working security for her. I told you not to come because I was planning on coming here. My baby will be raised with all of us under one roof. Either you’re moving back, or I am moving here.” I’m pissed, and right now, I am not even worried about hurting her feelings.
Kerrigan
Maddox is here. He is excited about this baby. When Maddox hurt me the first time, I was done with him and didn’t speak to him for over a year. This time I didn’t let myself fully believe he did anything wrong. Maddox fought too long and too hard to be with me, and with that in mind, I realize now how much I’ve grown. I can’t move back to Chicago right now because I have commitments, and I don’t want the added stress of t
he trial and all the news coverage of it.
“Maddox, I will move back to Chicago but it won’t be for several months,” I say. “I don’t know if you know this or not, but I love decorating and designing. I’m helping a young couple with their wedding. And Jay is so backed up at the church on filing and sending out invoices for the missionaries from the church. I can’t just up and leave. I will move back, though.”
“Alright, then I’ll move here,” he says, as if it was no big deal.
“Maddox, you have a job, a career. Stay in Chicago. We can work something out to see each other more.”
“That doesn’t matter. I’m not going to let my girl go through her pregnancy on her own. I want to be there for every moment. I want to see your belly grow. I want to feel my baby kick and listen to its heartbeat.”
“Maddox, I know, and I want those things too. You can’t up and quit, it’ll only be harder when we return. We will both be out of a job with a new baby. I can make the exciting appointments far in advance so you can request the time off and be here. That way, you’ll get to hear the first heartbeat when we find out what we’re having.”
“I don’t like that idea, Kerrigan,” he says, though, I can tell he understands.
“Me neither. Come here,” I say. He walks over, and I place his hand on my belly. “That’s your baby in there, Maddox, our baby. We will do what’s right for him. I love you.”
“Him?” Maddox smirks.
“Yes, him.” I say.
Maddox drops down onto his knees and brings my shorts down with them. Uh, this is totally gross. I just woke up. I go to pull him up, but he is a man on a mission.
“I’ve missed your taste, Kerrigan,” he says, his voice is gruff. I watch as his tongue goes to my clit and his fingers slide inside me. Right away, I start moaning. It feels so good, so right. I’m shocked when he actually sticks his tongue inside me. No one has ever done that.
Rebuilding Stone (The Stone Brother Series Book 2) Page 14