by Leigh Hutton
‘I was hoping … ’
‘What do you expect, for me to send you with my credit card?’ Leslie snapped. Her fingers were hitting the keys harder, and it sounded like machine gun fire. ‘Can you not see that I’m busy? This is my work it pays the bills around here, and it cannot wait!’
Clover sat absolutely still. If she didn’t move, not even blink, she’d hopefully be able to keep the tears inside.
‘I’m sorry about your racing, but it’s time you got serious about school. I’ve told you before, you can’t have both. There should be a lot more to your future than riding motorbikes Bill!’ Leslie answered her phone. ‘I just sent the email … yes, I attached the PDF. You can’t open it? Well, I’m not sure what else I can do, from here, right now!’
Leslie hung up, and turned to her. Clover’s eyes shot to the rug.
‘Maybe, after Jasmine’s show on Saturday, we can all go to the mall?’ Leslie turned back to the computer. ‘Jasmine needs underwear and a new bra, we could get you some, too.’
‘Don’t worry about it!’ Clover got up and ran to her bedroom, and slammed her door behind her. She went straight to her wardrobe, tripping over a pair of discarded sweat pants and a textbook, and nearly smacking her head on the foot of her bed. She caught herself just in time. Slid open her wardrobe door, and started pulling clothes from the hangers, off the shelves, from the huge pile at the bottom. Surely, she could find a decent pair of jeans? Maybe even her bow cardigan. She could wear the boots Sera lent her. They were a bit small and made her toes go numb, but what did that matter? Anything was better than having to deal with her mother.
FOUR
Clover had passed the gravel road to the party spot known as Camp Shitty about a hundred times. It had earned its name for being a fall back venue for kids to congregate, if no one was keen to throw a house party.
Clover took the left hand turn, and smiled as the truck was swallowed by a tunnel of thick evergreens. The road was washed out and riddled with potholes that sent shudders through the truck’s suspension. Her foot crept down on the accelerator, and she sat forward in her seat, gripping the wheel. Just like a racetrack. Only now, she was just here for fun.
Sera tensed in the passenger seat, with her phone in her hand probably on Facebook. Clover let the back end of the truck slide on the loose gravel around the next corner, just to make Sera a little more nervous. She grinned. Now this was fun.
The truck’s suspension unloaded as they hit a bump on the narrowing track, sending the pair up towards the roof. Both of their large drink cups, now thankfully empty, flew from the cup holders and joined the McDonald’s bag and discarded Gatorade bottles and race paraphernalia, including one of her muddy gloves, on the floor.
‘Damn, Clove,’ Sera said, grabbing the dashboard. ‘We’re not racing for gold!’
‘Sorry,’ Clover said, without taking her eyes from the road. But she didn’t let off. ‘How much further?’ The night was black, without any stars. ‘Do you think Dee Harding, and them, will be here?’
‘Don’t worry about them’ Sera said, typing madly into her phone. ‘I’ve got your back.’
‘But they do come to most parties, don’t they?’ Clover already knew the answer. The coolest girls came to every party. That’s what made them cool. That, and their awesome clothes, perfect hair, popular boyfriends, and carefree attitudes. There was a lot to it, actually. Pretty overwhelming when you were starting from not much at all.
Sera dropped her phone in her lap and sat up in her seat. The track had widened into a meadow, sloping down to the bank of Clearview Lake. Clover stared at the dark expanse of water reflecting the lights from the homes on the other side of the lake, and at the headlights from the carloads of people passing them to park down near the bonfire, crackling up into the night.
Made it! Luckily her parents were out for dinner and wouldn’t be home until ten, according to a note she’d found on the fridge when she’d arrived home from school. She hadn’t bothered telling her parents she was going out. The week had been bliss after the incident with Leslie, she’d only seen Ernie a few times when she’d ducked into the kitchen to get some soup for dinner or make herself a pop tart.
They were a good distance from the other cars, but Clover felt safe. ‘Happy here?’ she said. ‘We shouldn’t get parked in.’
‘Are you trying to say I need the exercise?’ Sera said, flicking off her seatbelt. ‘Thanks for finding a nice way of saying I’ve got a fat ass.’
‘It’s not fat you know it looks hot.’ Clover glanced over Sera’s head and out the passenger window, straining to see if she recognised any of the faces around the bonfire. Sera linked arms with Clover, tiptoeing in the mud in her sky-high stilettos. Clover had settled on her best sneakers, and she’d found a decent pair of jeans and shrunk them in the dryer. She’d grown accustomed to wearing baggy jeans, as she was sure she had pear-shaped hips.
She’d borrowed a black hoodie from Sera. It was small in the arms and the body, but did well to accentuate her boobs. Sera had done her hair and gone all out with her makeup, even gave her the pink lipstick to carry in her pocket for re-application throughout the night. Clover was finally feeling cool, and it was awesome.
The girls made their way down to the bonfire, and Sera kept up her lamentation about her figure. ‘Just look at it!’ She pointed to her butt. ‘It’s that fat. Makes JLo look like an Olsen twin. Seriously, I know exactly where that five pounds went.’
‘Sera, would you please shut up,’ Clover snapped. They were among the vehicles now and could run into anyone at any minute. ‘What are you? Like a hundred pounds dripping wet? You’re gorgeous.’
‘One-eleven, actually. And, whatever, you’re, like, super fit. Once you get out of those baggy pants, everyone can see your figure. Now, just tell me! Am I do-able or not?’
Clover groaned inwardly as she looked into Sera’s sculpted face. She was so beautiful, with high cheekbones, wide, sparkling brown eyes and perfectly styled, long blonde hair. She’d just landed a football player, for goodness sake. Everyone thought she was hot, except for the most important person. Sera herself.
‘You are definitely do-able, Sera.’
‘Thank you.’ Sera wiggled her behind, and threw her head back to laugh. ‘Maybe I’ll get lucky tonight!’
‘Sera!’ Clover hushed her with a finger, and noticed her hands were shaking. Her stomach growled; the Big Mac wasn’t sitting well. She was too nervous, and excited. Tonight was going to change her life. She hoped for the better.
She tripped on a beer can, and looked down to see that the ground was already littered with cans and bottles, in and around the parked cars and trucks. Clover clutched Sera tighter for support. The girls giggled as they passed Travis the quarterback’s ‘shaggin’ wagon’: a 90’s model Chevy van, decked out with plush carpet and a mattress in the back, and the obligatory ‘If it’s rockin’ don’t bother knockin’’ sticker.
‘Wonder if he’s got Dee in there?’ Sera said.
Clover laughed nervously. She hoped Dee would be occupied for the evening, with something other than turning hers to hell.
As they walked around Travis’s van, the group of partiers and the fire came clearly into view.
‘Wow,’ Sera said. ‘There must be, like, a hundred people here. Must have seen my status update!’
‘That’s exactly why they’re all here, Sera.’
‘It is! And how perfect is this party for your debut to the scene?’
Clover laughed and swung her arm around Sera’s shoulders. She was suddenly confident, heading down towards the music, pumping from a black truck parked to the side of the fire. The voices were loud, too. A buzz hung in the atmosphere. It drifted up towards the starless sky with the sparks from the bonfire. Being at a party was even more exciting than Clover had imagined.
But in an instant, Clover’s feet had frozen in the muddy ground. The snake-like eyes of Dee Harding seared into hers.
‘What does the Loser
Canuck think she’s doing here?’ Dee flicked her hair over one shoulder.
Clover’s mouth went dry, and her chest revved up, then froze with fear. Her worst nightmare was unfolding. Maybe coming to a party was the worst idea of her life? She was going to get her ass kicked.
Dee had her besties with her, as always. The toughest girl in school stood just behind her and the head cheerleader simpered at her flank.
‘She just asked you a question!’ the tough one said.
‘You lost to that Texan bitch, again?!’ Dee asked, stepping up into her face. ‘She’s my boyfriend’s cousin, you know he said she can’t ride a bike for shit. And you keep letting her beat you!’
Dee and the other girls laughed, but jumped with fright when Travis fell out of the back of his van, followed by a very large girl, her boobs spilling out of her bra.
Dee turned her attention to Travis, ‘What’s going on?’ she shrieked. She craned her neck to identify the girl in the ‘shaggin’ wagon’.
‘Back off, bitch!’ the boob-girl screamed, throwing a beer bottle. Dee was after her in a flash.
Clover grabbed Sera and dragged her all the way back to her truck.
‘What the hell are you doing?’ Sera asked as she grabbed Clover’s hand off the gear stick. ‘Are you kidding?’ Clover said, tears rolling down her cheeks.
‘We can avoid them!’ Sera said, her eyes wide, pleading. ‘Please, Clover. You can’t leave now! If you do, you’ve let them win. Let’s go back. It’s the only way.’ She placed a hand on Clover’s arm. ‘Trust me.’
Clover forced herself to take a breath. She knew, deep down, that Sera was right. She’d been running from Dee long enough.
‘Come on, Clover.’ Sera said. Clover sniffed, and wiped at her eyes with her sleeve.
‘Hey!’ Sera said. ‘Don’t you go wrecking my hoodie!’ She whipped mascara and foundation out of her handbag, and got to work, fixing Clover’s tear-stained face. ‘My best friend gave me that sweater and I’d do anything for her.’ She sat back to admire her handiwork. ‘Perfect! Now get your undies out of your ass, and let’s go have some fun.’
They paused at the edge of the partiers, and sat on a log, overlooking the fire and the lake. Around them people were smiling, laughing, and swilling back drinks. A few guys wrestled off to the side of the bonfire. A guy and girl, who looked much too young, were making out in the mud.
She was sure she could see Dallas Cash, one of the hottest guys in school, standing next to the truck that was pumping tunes. Clover took in his wide shoulders, strong legs and perfect face. He looked as confident and self-assured as a soldier.
Dallas flashed his piercing green eyes in her direction, and she promptly looked away.
Someone sat down next to her, and she nearly jumped out of her skin.
‘It’s okay,’ Sera said, holding her down on the log. ‘This is Sydney. She’s just moved here, from Denver. She’s starting school next week.’
Clover’s face went hot. She stole a look at the girl, and was instantly more relaxed. Sydney was taller, like her, with kind blue eyes behind stylish, black-rimmed glasses. Clover totally felt like she’d found another friend. It was an incredible feeling, like the day Sera had first talked to her, in her sophomore math class.
Sera had tapped her on the shoulder, and quietly asked for the answer to a question, but Clover was just as stumped as she was. The girls managed to cheat off the smart guy next to them, and they both passed the test. They’d been best friends ever since.
‘Hi, Clover!’ Sydney said, giving her a hug. The girl was so warm, Clover wanted to stay in her arms forever. ‘I’ve been dying to meet you!’
‘Wow,’ Clover said. She was feeling a bit wobbly, and she hadn’t even had a drink.
‘Sorry,’ Sera said, ‘I did tell you we were meeting Sydney here, didn’t I?’
‘Can’t blame you if you forgot,’ Sydney said, smiling. ‘With a boy like Chris on your mind!’ She turned to Clover. ‘I hear it’s our mission to find you a boyfriend. Let’s have a look, hmmm …’ She scanned the bodies, and Clover’s eyes followed. The log was up a little rise, so they could see everyone around them. A good vantage to watch out for Dee. An even better spot to check out guys.
‘Do you have a boyfriend?’ Clover asked. She couldn’t believe how comfortable she was with Sydney, even though they’d met only minutes before. Sydney smiled. ‘Spencer goes to uni in Denver.’
‘Uni, wow.’
‘Sera mentioned you wanted to get your hair done. Call me next week and we’ll set something up.’
Clover stared, wide eyed.
‘Her mom’s a hairdresser!’ Sera said.
‘I’m doing an apprenticeship,’ Sydney said. ‘I’d love to do your hair.’
‘That’s unreal!’ Clover threw an arm around Sydney it was the happiest she’d felt since leaving Canada. All it took was forgetting about racing, and partying!
Chris appeared behind Sera, and thrust a pink, frosty beverage into each of their hands.
‘He’s a keeper,’ Sydney said, twisting the top off hers.
Clover’s mouth started to water at the sharp, fruity aroma.
Chris bent down to kiss Sera. They were such a hot couple. She’d heard rumours about Chris, but most of the popular guys were called ‘players’, so she didn’t take much notice.
The music from the black truck pumped up and she recognised the song.
And the drink kept calling her, ‘Be brave, drink me! Have fun!’
The first few gulps went down like heaven.
In no time at all, Clover forgot all about Dee and pulled Sydney out into the throng of the coolest kids from Silvertown to have a dance.
FIVE
Light. Arggh!
‘Turn it off!’ Clover mumbled. ‘Jasmine!’ She shouted and then regretted it.
No more noise. Head, pain. Sick. Stomach, sick.
Clover groaned and rolled over, putting a hand to her mouth. She fell and hit the floor with a smack. At this point, the pent up mass in her gut broke free and splattered against the wall. Sweaty and trembling, she raised herself to a shaky all fours and saw in front of her a red feature wall. Not her room. This was bad. Clover hadn’t asked to stay out last night.
She swiped at her mouth.
‘What’s that smell? Holy shit, Clover. What the hell?’
‘Don’t yell!’ Clover whispered.
‘Couldn’t you have gotten to the bathroom? Man, it stinks!’
Clover blinked. ‘Sera?’ Her skull threatened to crack.
‘Yes it’s me! Get your ass up so you can clean my freakin’ room! Oh great, and you’re wearing my cheerleading skirt, too. Good one. Suppose I’ll have to get it sanitized now.’
Clover tried to get her shaky legs to lift her weight, but the room spun as she got to her feet. ‘What happened last night?’ she croaked, losing her balance to collapse once more on the bed.
Sera looked amused and pissed off at the same time. It was a look Clover had seen way too often and always found annoying. ‘Other than you being a cheap drunk and not being able to hold your liquor, not bloody much.’
Clover squeezed her eyes. A hazy image of strip dancing and truck beds was skirting around the edges of her mind.
‘Thank God for Dallas, hey, or we never would’ve got you home.’
‘Shit!’ Clover said, trying to sit up.
Sera put her hands on her chest and gently pressed her back down on the bed. ‘Don’t freak out. I messaged your dad off your phone and told him you were here, watching a movie with me.’
‘Wait you said, Dallas?’
‘Yep, you screwed him on the hood of his truck.’
Clover’s skin froze to her bones.
But Sera was laughing. ‘Got-cha! Man, you should see your face. No, Dallas was a perfect gentleman, much to my surprise. He took us home.’
‘Sorry about that.’ Clover sat up slowly and as she did, some dancers appeared through the haze of her memory, gyratin
g semi-naked in the back of a truck. ‘Did I, er, dance anywhere last night?’
‘Did you ever!’ Sera said. ‘If Sydney and I hadn’t jumped up there with you, it woulda’ been a one-woman show, too. Crazy funny.’
Clover groaned. ‘Now I know why my parents have always said that getting wasted is B-A-D. I can’t believe I did that. And for the love of God, close your bloody blinds!’
Clover crept into her house through the downstairs entry. Both her parents’ vehicles were in the driveway. For once everyone was home. Shitty timing.
The smell of vomit still radiated off her, even after scrubbing hard in the shower and washing her hair. Sera had lent her some clean clothes, thank goodness.
She tiptoed down the hallway, heard voices out on the patio, and quickened her step.
‘Have fun at your sleep over, Clover?’ Ernie’s voice rang out. She heard the high-pitched trill of her sister’s laugh, and bile rose up in her throat. There they were, the happy family, without her around.
‘Yep!’ she replied.
‘What you up to?’
‘Gotta … um, head to the library!’
‘Be home by this afternoon. I want to talk to you about next season.’
Clover chucked the plastic bag that contained her dirty clothes and ruined sneakers into the bottom of her wardrobe. Another shower, her cleanest track pants, a glass of water and brushed teeth and Clover was feeling like an exhausted, but fairly normal, version of herself. She settled on her bed with her phone, ready to message Sydney and Sera about meeting up.
She stared with disbelief at her phone. THREE messages. All new. All for her. It had certainly been the best night of her life.
The first, from Sera: How’d u go with rents, dude? Haha.
Second, from Sydney: Hi buddy hope you’re all good with your folks. Awesome to party with u. C u on mday xx
Her hand started to shake when she realised who the third message was from. Her mouth dropped open in surprise.
Dallas! She read the message a second time, suddenly feeling very hot. How’d he get my number?