by Anna Scott
I watched as the four of them climbed into Sam’s truck and drove away. Jimmy’s head turned to stare at me one more time before he lost sight of me. My instincts were on high alert. I didn’t know what it was about him, but I trusted my gut enough to pay attention.
Chapter 9
Hope
My meeting with Vanessa ran way over. She was terrified. It seemed that every time she left the safety of the shelter, she thought she saw her husband. We talked about her options, moving to another area, only going out in public with someone else and keeping her phone on her at all times. We also discussed the last attack and ways she could have gotten away from him.
She admitted that she’d frozen in terror and had just gone along with him, instead of screaming, fighting and trying to get away. Even if she hadn’t gotten away from him, an outburst like that would have probably caught someone’s attention and maybe she would have gotten help sooner.
There was power in fighting back, in the knowledge that you weren’t a helpless victim. Even if the outcome had been the same, she’d have felt reassured in the knowledge that she’d tried.
“Hey, I’m just leaving.” I’d promised Jake I would call when I left. I wanted to make his efforts at protecting me as easy as possible.
“You okay? I was starting to worry.” He sounded frustrated, angry even. I couldn’t get a clear read on his mood, but it definitely wasn’t jovial.
“Yeah, my meeting went long, that’s all. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you;” I rushed out, sounding extremely defensive and apologetic.
“Baby, what the fuck?”
“I’m so sorry, Jake, I didn’t mean to be so late; it’s just-”
“Baby, stop.” Jake’s voice was soft, his words a command but spoken gently. He wanted my attention. With all the drama swirling around me lately, I seemed to be falling back into these old patterns. I hated it. I didn’t want to feel like this ridiculous, weak woman anymore: I wasn’t her anymore, I wasn’t my mother. I never would be again.
“Hope, come home, okay? We’ll talk and then go to dinner. How’s that sound?” His words, still gentle, now had an underlying thread of concern mixed in.
“Okay, I’ll be there in twenty.”
“See you soon, baby.”
Pulling away from Freedom House, I turned right instead of left. As he’d requested, I drove a different way every day. Thankfully, I’d lived here my entire life, so I knew all the little side streets and could make small modifications to my route.
Turning right for the third time in a row, I ended up on another quiet residential street. The old brown Chevy truck, two cars behind me turned too. Now the truck was directly behind me. I couldn’t drive faster here, so I kept going. Turning right one more time, getting back on the path I’d been following, I watched in the rear view mirror as the truck slowed and followed. It seemed to be keeping a distance, but it had to be following me, I’d just driven in a circle.
Keeping my eyes on the road, I reached down to the center console and grabbed my phone. Once I stopped at a stop light, I clicked on the most recent call and hit the green button. It rang once when Jake’s tense voice came over the line.
“Baby, what’s wrong?” He knew, somehow, he knew that I wasn’t okay. He always knew.
“There’s a truck, I drove around a neighborhood in a complete circle and it followed.” My voice quivered with fear and I knew he could hear it. I didn’t want to be scared, but I was.
“What does it look like?”
“It’s an old brown Chevy, Silverado I think.”
“Did you get a look at the driver?”
“No, it’s stayed far enough back that I can’t see in the window. What do I do Jake?”
“Where are you?”
“University and Hardin.”
“Drive to the police department, go straight there, pick up the speed if you can, drive right into the parking lot to the front doors. I want you to pull in and angle your car so that the driver’s door is closest to the entrance. I’m going to call down there and let them know you’re coming; I’ll meet you there.”
“Okay, I’m getting ready to turn on Community now.”
“Good job, baby, you’re so brave. You’re doing great. I’ll be there in fifteen. Someone will meet you in the parking lot, I want you to go inside until I get there.”
“Okay, almost there. Thanks, Jake.” My hands shook as I made the turn, the truck was still behind me. There was enough traffic down here that it was easy for the driver to stay back. I couldn’t go faster, there were too many cars. I let out a deep breath when the PD came into sight.
Doing just as Jake had told me, I pulled into the parking lot, drove straight to the front doors, parked next to the entrance, even though there wasn’t a space available and saw an officer standing there. I hoped he was the one who was supposed to be waiting for me.
Not even introducing himself, he wrapped an arm around me before I was fully out of my car and pushed me in front of him, then guided me inside the building.
The truck had stopped at the entrance to the parking lot, holding up traffic. Horns were blaring around it and once we were safely inside, we watched through the glass doors as it sped off, driving erratically.
I stood there in stunned silence, and watched the traffic, now getting back to normal. That had been one of the strangest and possibly most terrifying experiences of my life. I’d been through a decent amount of crap, thanks to my ex, but the unknown element of the situation brought with it an entirely new level of fear.
The officer who was still standing next to me, turned to face me, extended his hand and introduced himself.
“Hope, right?” I nodded and took the offered hand. His handshake was firm and confident. Somehow, it also expressed a level of gentleness and concern, though I had no idea how someone would convey that in a handshake. “I’m Dan Dupree. Jake Thompson called, said someone was possibly following you.” I wasn’t able to verbalize my answer yet, so I just nodded again. He smiled, showing perfect white teeth.
Officer Dupree was an extremely handsome man, tall, dark brown hair and eyes the color of milk chocolate. If I wasn’t in the middle of this personal drama, I would have paid closer attention to the obvious strength of his wide shoulders and thick biceps. The easy smile showed an inherent sweetness which I found so attractive.
The double doors opened a few seconds later and Gavin strode in. Gavin was a sheriff’s deputy for Collin County, he and Trent worked together. I didn’t know Gavin very well, he was quiet, seemed shy, like I was.
“Hope!” Gavin exclaimed as he stopped short, right in front of me. He grabbed my shoulders and wrapped me in his strong arms. My arms went around him automatically, surprised by this unusual show of emotion, but appreciating it all the same. “Are you okay, girl?”
Finally, able to speak, I responded; “Yeah, I’m fine, just a bit freaked out, I guess.”
“I heard the call go out, Trent’s on it, helping to locate the truck. I ran over, I didn’t want you to be alone.”
I was completely taken aback by his concern. Once he released me, I stepped back, now positioned between the two men. I thought that his reaction was over the top. I’d barely had a conversation with him, so this was strange, though appreciated. It was nice to have someone here, that I knew.
“Well, I think I can probably leave, unless you need something from me?” I said to the officer beside me. I wasn’t sure that I could offer any help, wasn’t even sure if there was anything to do. Jake had mentioned though that he’d seen a truck like that near my house a few times, so I realized the possibility of the two being the same was probably high.
“No, Jake wants you to stay here until he gets here. Then, we’ll need to have you give a statement. Would you like to sit down and wait for him?”
“I should move my car to a proper parking place, at least.” I told him, indicating my car, still running, parked haphazardly in the lot.
“I’ll take c
are of it.” Gavin said, reaching out to squeeze my shoulder.
“Thanks,” I muttered, not really sure what to do with myself. I just wanted to leave, to go home and relax. Of course, I couldn’t go home. It was nice to stay at Jake’s house, he’d been so generous and protective, but it was a trying situation. If this was Tim causing this mess, I couldn’t understand why he’d bother me now. What had changed in the past two years?
I watched through the glass doors as Gavin walked out, folded his body into my little Acura and parked it in a nearby spot. The sight of him driving such a small car was so funny to me; I started laughing. It was such an inappropriate time to laugh and I sensed Officer Dupree’s unease ratchet up, but that didn’t stop me.
Once Gavin joined us again, my laughter had settled, but I didn’t miss the concerned look the two men exchanged. Jake came in shortly after my hysteria had subsided. He moved straight to me, took me into his arms and held me so tight, I could hardly breathe.
He dipped his head and pressed his cheek to the top of my head. He didn’t let go for so long. I didn’t care what kind of spectacle we were making, didn’t care what anyone around us thought, I was exactly where I needed to be. My body relaxed in his arms, in a way I hadn’t been able to before. He felt it, as soon as I melted into him, he moved his head, found my lips and kissed me long and deep.
I heard Gavin chuckle behind me just as Officer Dupree cleared his throat. I tried to pull away, but Jake pulled me closer, slowed the kiss, pulled back and stared into my eyes. He leaned in one more time, kissed my lips quickly, and then let me go.
With one arm firmly around my shoulders, Jake and I followed the officer to the back and sat in a conference room.
It was brightly lit, a long dark wood table surrounded completely by padded blue chairs. Jake pulled one out for me, then sat next to me, never releasing me from his hold. If his arm wasn’t around me, he held my hand.
We started in, another officer joining us, and both took copious notes. The second officer was a petite woman with light brown hair, pulled back into a tight bun at the base of her head. She was pretty in an uncomplicated way. She was self-assured and completely confident. I envied her that, right now. Everything in my life was in such turmoil, I could hardly remember a time I’d been as strong. I had been once; I just couldn’t find that in myself now.
I noticed a peculiar look she shot Jake’s way, but he either didn’t notice it or ignored it. The gaze was fleeting, but I thought I’d seen longing, though I couldn’t be sure.
As I described the truck and explained every detail about what had happened today, I felt Jake’s anger radiating off him. When I turned my head in his direction, I saw that his jaw was clenched, his expression - hard.
“I’m so sorry,” I said quietly, so only he could hear. I didn’t know how to diffuse the situation. This ridiculous nonsense had been too much. I was taking too much of his time, causing too much trouble. He didn’t need this from me. We were dating, but that didn’t mean that he needed to wade in and take care of everything for me.
“What?” he asked sharply. His angry glare now directed right at me. I felt my body shrink away. He felt it too. Jake stood abruptly, grabbed my hand and pulled me up with him. “Dan, can we have a minute?”
“Of course, the room next door is empty.” Dan’s tone was surprised, maybe concerned, but he schooled his features and didn’t share what he thought about the strange request.
Jake nodded and pulled me behind him. I was so nervous, I couldn’t imagine what he wanted to say, was he going to lay into me for this? Again, I was falling back on old patterns, I knew it, somewhere I did, just had no idea how to turn off that reaction.
Inside the much smaller room, Jake closed the door and flipped on the lights. He didn’t yell though, he pulled me into him and wrapped his arms around me again.
“Baby, what’s going on in that head of yours?” His question surprised me, I had no idea how to answer him.
“What?”
“Stop this, I’m not upset with you. I’m upset with the situation.” There he was, in my head again. He knew, he always knew exactly what I was thinking.
“I’m sorry, Jake, I hate that you’re in this mess, you’re spending so much time dealing with my stuff. It probably wasn’t anything, maybe just some guy with road rage or something.” Okay, I was full of it, I knew the driver was following me. What I didn’t know was, if Tim had been driving it, or even if it had been his truck.
Giving me a quick squeeze, he moved his hand up, and pulled my chin so I was looking into his eyes. He was studying me, looking deep within.
“Baby, I’m not upset with you. Hear me, I’m not angry with you. I’m angry that some asshole is stalking your house, stalking you and following you. I’m angry that someone is scaring you, and taking you back into this place in your mind, where you feel the need to apologize to me for every little thing.” He held my gaze, his face was serious, but gentle. “This isn’t even your fault. I’m frustrated that your ex, wasn’t ever found and dealt with. I’m not angry with you. Do you get me?”
His words were given softly, but his meaning was firm. I took a minute and let that all penetrate. He was right. I was going back into that defensive place, trying to ward off impending danger. Jake wasn’t dangerous, not to me. He was fiercely loyal, he was bossy and protective, but he wasn’t dangerous.
Nodding my head, I gave him a little smile and relished the feel when he leaned down and kissed the tip of my nose. It was such a simple action, but spoke volumes to me. Even in bed, he could be rough with me, but always made sure he didn’t hurt me. I loved it, loved the way he made me feel.
These reactions were a product of my time with Tim and even before that, my time with my father. Though, my father never beat us, not really, he spanked us a lot. No, his abuse had been verbal; constant put downs, constant reprimands for the slightest infraction, constant berating words when we disagreed with him - constant.
Neither of those men were anything like Jake. He was a man, a strong man. He wasn’t strong or manly because he belittled and abused those weaker than himself. He protected them.
I did recall the time he’d yelled at Aurora though, that hadn’t been pretty, and it seemed so out of character for him. Now that I’d spent time with him, I couldn’t imagine him doing something like that, I wondered how he’d gotten to that point, what had pushed him that far and if something even worse – something like this could push him even further.
After settling me down, Jake led me back into the conference room. Trent had joined the group, they were all talking quietly, but as soon as we walked into the room, they quieted and looked to us. I’d pulled myself together, found the strength I needed, thanks to Jake, and took my seat once more.
I finished, giving them all the information I had. Then, Jake had me go over what I knew about Tim, which wasn’t much. I gave them the basics about the story, knowing that they could pull the report if they wanted all the details. I didn’t talk about that anymore, hadn’t for a couple of years. There was no need to go into the specific details, explaining that I’d been in an abusive relationship was generally enough.
Once my part was done, the four of them began to discuss strategy and Jake gave all the information he had on the truck. I found out he’d gotten the license plate number, but he hadn’t seen the driver either, had just seen a shadow inside the truck once, indicating that someone was inside. Once they ran the plates, they came back to a James Stone, no one I knew. I wasn’t aware of anyone in the neighborhood with that name either, so I was at a total loss.
Officer Christine Gates stood from her chair, and quietly asked me if I would speak to her outside. Of course, I agreed, though Jake didn’t look too happy about it, and I followed her.
She led me back into the smaller room next door, closed the door behind me and took a seat. I sat perpendicular to her and waited.
“May I call you Hope?” She asked, professionally, but with obvious care.
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“Of course.”
“Thank you.” She smiled a small smile and continued. “I asked to meet with you privately because sometimes, it can be easier for women to speak one-on-one to another woman. In your line of work, I assume you know that.” I nodded and she went on: “Is there more; more to what your ex-boyfriend did that you haven’t shared?”
I looked at her, confused. There was, but I didn’t see how it was relevant.
“Well, yes and no. Yes, I didn’t give details, obviously, but no, there’s no other evidence that he’s been stalking me, not for the past two years.”
She nodded in understanding, pressed her lips together and thought for a moment. “When you say, he was abusive, can you tell me what you mean?”
I blinked, not sure how to answer. I thought that in this situation, that should be enough. “Well, he hit me, he spoke down to me, I’m not sure what you’re looking for.” I hoped that would be enough information, but just knew it wouldn’t be.
“What was your breaking point?” She asked, what I thought was a very strange question. My breaking point.
“Well, when we started dating, I was away from home, in college. He was very sweet, solicitous. Over time, his behavior began to change. Eventually, he slapped me or pushed me around. Not a lot, but once in a while, when we argued.” I paused to consider my next words. I hadn’t answered her actual question yet, and I didn’t know why I was telling her all this, but there was something about this kind woman that encouraged me to continue.
“That went on for a couple of years, but finally, the night I left things got bad. He was angry with me, we got into a fight and he went too far, way too far. After he left, I called a taxi and went to the ER.” I finished, spine straight, voice calm and unwavering. I’d done it, I told her without breaking down or allowing my head to spiral out of control.