by Ker Dukey
“Enough!” Buzz roars, clearing the trees and pointing his gun in the direction of my head.
“Do it!” I coax, my voice shaking.
His eyes squint and his pulse ticks in his jaw.
“Fucking do it!” I scream, this time taking the steps towards him. I reach up and grasp the barrel of his gun and pin it to my forehead.
“Do it. Do it. Do it!” I roar.
He flicks his wrist, and I feel the impact of him cold clocking me and then…
…Nothing.
* * *
Pain. It’s searing and clouding my thoughts. My hand lifts to touch the thudding in my head and pain explodes where I touch. I hiss in pain and blink my eyes open, thankful that the dim firelight takes mercy on them. I ache all over and feel like I could sleep for a week.
Awareness trickles through me and the hairs raise on my arms. There’s a blanket over my body, it itches my flesh.
I jolt, sitting bolt upright. My head smarts but I ignore it and instead pull the covers away from my body. My naked body.
Panic seizes my chest and I can’t take a breath. My lungs tighten, and I panic, holding the blanket to my chest.
Warm arms come around me and pin me to a hard chest. “Breathe.”
Buzz coaxes in my ear but I tense all over and begin to shake uncontrollably.
“You were soaking, I didn’t want you to catch your death,” he assures me.
My body muscles relax, and oxygen begins to filter through to my lungs.
“I’m sorry for hurting you but you shouldn’t have run.”
“You can’t keep me forever, Buzz,” I cry. I’m exhausted, my body weak and tired. I hold the blanket to my flesh, clutching it like it’s a life raft.
“Why can’t I?” he breathes out, but I think it’s more for him. He inhales my hair and I stiffen.
I need to try a different tactic.
“Would Tats want this? Would he want you to keep me prisoner?” I ask.
His arms tense and I gulp down the fear of pushing him too far.
“Tats is dead, he can’t want anything.”
“I’m sorry, I really am. I’m sorry for what Brenner did to him but it wasn’t me. He’s not coming, it’s been too long. Please just let me go.”
“I miss him.”
My heart stammers. He sounds so vulnerable. I chance a look over my shoulder and see his eyes cast down.
“I don’t know who I am without him.”
Closing my eyes, I take in a few breaths. He’s scared, in pain and broken.
“What do you want to be?” I ask.
Silence falls around us all but the crackling of the fire, and then he says. “Not lonely.” It’s so raw, like the inner boy who lost everyone in his life has come to the surface.
A tear drops from my eye as I swallow his words down.
I turn to face him and see defeat etched on every inch of his face, lines crinkle his forehead and tears well in his eyes.
I slip my arms around him and bring him to rest his head on my shoulder. The contact makes him solidify at first but then he relaxes into me, his hands gripping around my back and holding me so tight it’s hard to breathe. But I don’t stop him. I don’t pull away. I offer him this comfort. He’s human, and he’s in pain.
“Just lay with me awhile,” he begs.
“Then can I go?”
“If you just lay with me a while.”
So, I do. I lay down. He rests his body against mine, the warmth of his skin heating mine.
He sighs, and I try to keep my eyes open, but I fail.
Sweet oblivion takes us both.
23
Slade/Frost
We stand at the entrance to the Cutters club, guns in hand just in case they decide to back out of the deal I’ve made with Brig and come out guns blazing. God knows it’s been brewing for some time now.
Giving him Lilith territory is a big price to pay, especially after everything that’s gone down over the past months. We’ve been hemorrhaging respect and rank and deals since all this shit blew up. But we’ve lost enough. I refuse to lose Rhiannon too.
Tank is going to lose his shit when he finds out I’m making deals without his consent, but we’ve wasted enough time. I’ll handle the fall out once it’s all over and Rhi is back where she belongs.
The gates open and Brig and around ten of his brothers join him.
He cocks a brow at my weapon and holds his hands up.
“Now, now, no need for that shit, is there?”
“I dunno, is there?” I ask.
He grins and gestures with his fingers to someone by their club back entrance to come forward.
Two bothers come into view with a limp body carried between them, his feet dragging behind over the asphalt. His feet are bare and so is his chest. Cuts, red and risen on his torso, show they’ve used their little time with him well.
“He breathing?” I growl.
Brig shrugs. “Just. You said you wanted him alive, not in good health.”
Motherfucker.
I nod for Scorch and Owl to go ahead and take him off their hands.
Brenner’s head lifts and his eyes clash with mine. One of them is swollen shut.
Scorch drags him over to the truck and puts him inside.
Brig spits on his hand and offers it to me.
“A deal is a deal.”
I want to ask him how he could look his daughter in the eye, seeing everything she’s been put through by this fucker’s hands and hand him over for territory.
I just want to get this motherfucker out of here and get Rhiannon back, so I can kill Buzz and then take my time with Brenner.
I spit on my palm and grasp his, shaking. Then I leave without another word.
I stare at a battered Brenner in the back of the truck through the windshield. Scorch is seething and jittery in the passenger seat and Owl has climbed into the back with Brenner.
I open my door and climb in.
This is testing every ounce of my self-restraint.
“You know,” Brenner spits. Blood dribbles from his mouth and he’s breathing is ragged. “Brig hits like a girl.” He’s wheezing, no doubt due to a few cracked ribs. My girl had cracked ribs too.
“Shut up!” I growl.
“Damn, even Avery’s punches were stronger than his,” he bates me.
‘Don’t kill him, don’t kill him,’ I chant over and over in my head.
“Gag that motherfucker!” Scorch barks.
“With what?” Owl asks. Fucking idiot.
“How is she by the way?” Brenner continues.
My head is swimming, the prison of my mind assaulting me with her image, and of that fucking place he took her too.
“Shut your fucking mouth!” I growl as my hands start to shake.
“Ohh, someone’s angry,” he mocks. “You know the man who angers you, conquers you.” He chuckles and winces at the same time.
My eyes are finding it hard to concentrate on the road ahead. My gaze surrenders and keeps drawing to him through the rearview mirror. All the ways I could keep him alive while taking him apart. I thought I’d waiver and just want to end it quickly, but I don’t feel like I’m looking at my brother. It’s like looking at a monster that’s been living under the bed for eighteen years waiting to pounce.
Scorch rips at his shirt and leans over the seat, stuffing the material into Brenner’s mouth.
“You’re a piece of shit, and once we have Rhiannon back, you’ll pay for your betrayal,” Scorch bites out.
Brenner is staring at him like he spoke Chinese. He reaches up and tugs the gag from his mouth. “Fat fuck, did you not tie his fucking hands?” I bark to Owl. Unbelievable.
He looks at me with a stupid fucking expression on his face. I’m surprised Brenner hasn’t already made a move, fucking strangled me over the seat.
“What do you mean get Rhi back?” Brenner asks.
Scorch scoffs, shaking his head. “Your fucking carnage has consequences and
like usual you ain’t the one paying for them. Buzz took her.”
Brenner’s shoulders collapse, and he sits back in the seat.
“How long?” he growls. “How long has he had her?”
“Too - fucking - long. He wants you. So, guess what? He’s getting you,” Scorch warns.
“So that Axel piece of shit never had her?”
“No!” We all bark in unison.
Brenner tuts his tongue. “Can’t believe I wasted time getting his whore for him.”
My gun is out before I even realize I’m doing it. Scorch grabs my wrist. “Don’t let him off that easy, Brother.”
I relax my hand.
Scorch turns, leaning over the seats, and clocks Brenner with a closed fist, knocking the cunt clean out.
Silence.
We pull up at our clubhouse after I sped the entire way here, and unload Brenner. Tank comes barreling out of his office, then his feet falter when he sees who’s with us.
“Hey, Dad.” Brenner greets him with a bloody gap in his teeth from where Scorch punched him. His feet waver as the effects of his beating from Brig take effect.
“I’m no father of yours, you little cunt!” Prez growls. He appears to grow like a phantom beast, spreading out and commanding every inch of space.
Feigning insult, Brenner slaps a hand to his chest. “Words hurt, Dad.”
“I should have drowned you at birth,” Prez sneers.
“You think I give a fuck what you think? We all knew who your golden boy was.”
Damn, how fucking pathetic is he? It shows his youth, which only makes the whole situation worse. Darkness like his usually develops over a lifetime but he was born with it inside him.
“You little cunt, your sister has been subjected to God knows what and you have the balls to stand there acting like you’ve had a tough life and won this war you created.”
“He won’t touch her,” Brenner growls. There’s a conviction in his words that I don’t feel. He’s lost the plot. He knows what Buzz is capable of, and that was before his brother was murdered.
“You’re a coward, you should have given yourself over to him!” Prez roars.
Brenner shrugs Owl’s hand off his shoulder and takes a step forward. Everyone’s gun hand twitches but Prez holds his hand up to stop anyone unloading a barrel of carnage into him.
“You think I wouldn’t if I had fucking known? I’ll always protect her. She’s the only thing in this goddamn world I care about. I didn’t let Mom take her and I won’t let Buzz,” he sneers.
Prez blanches, his eyes narrowing into slits.
It takes a few seconds for what he said to sink in. It hits me like a loaded gun being fired from a poison tongue.
“What the fuck does that mean?” I sneer.
Brenner spits more blood to the floor and looks over at our old man. “Should you tell him, or shall I?” He smirks, his eyes dancing with hate and mischief.
“What the fuck is he going on about?”
The atmosphere thickens and almost chokes me.
“Nothing,” my dad rumbles out. “He’s a stirring little shit that better shut his mouth before I cut his tongue from it.”
“Mom was leaving,” Brenner states as he shrugs, casual as if he’s talking about the weather.
“Shut up!” Prez roars, landing a closed fist to Brenner’s jaw and knocking him to the floor.
Scorch grabs hold of Prez, keeping him back so he doesn’t end up killing Brenner and losing Rhi all in one go.
Broken laughter splutters from Brenner, he rubs at his jaw. “Now that’s a punch.”
“What the fuck were you saying about Mom?” I demand.
He takes his time getting to his feet and then faces me. He looks like shit, his skin blossoming with new bruises as every second ticks past.
“She was leaving us. Wanted to take Rhiannon with her.”
What? No, she didn’t.
“You’re lying.” I snort. He’s fucking lying, she wouldn’t leave us and take Rhiannon. She was depressed. She killed herself.
“She killed herself,” I say. The words are out my mouth and witnessed by all. I don’t even recognize my own voice. It’s tortured, the pain palpable.
“Slade,” Prez says my name like he’s approaching a wounded animal.
“No!” I hold up my hand to stop him talking. “I want Brenner to tell me what the fuck he’s talking about.”
“I couldn’t let her take Rhi away from me, she’s part of me,” Brenner tells me straight faced with no emotion.
“You were a kid, you were seven years old.” I shake my head, confusion and images from that day fighting for clarity.
“It doesn’t take much to pull a trigger, age has nothing to do with it,” he mocks.
No. No. He’s just fucking with me. He was seven years fucking old.
“Tell him,” I tell our Prez, our fucking father.
No wonder Brenner’s so fucked up if he’s delusional about her death and thinks he killed her.
“Tank, tell him!” I demand.
Silence.
“Prez!” I growl. “Tell him he’s confused. She killed herself.”
Silence.
All eyes are on me. Pity weighing me down and my legs almost buckle.
“Dad?” I plead.
His eyes are downcast.
Nothing makes sense.
“He took the gun from my desk before I even realized what was happening.” The words are defeated, soft and painful.
“No.”
“You should have seen her face, Slade, eyes wide, it was so quick, so easy,” Brenner taunts.
And I lose my grip on reality.
24
Scorch
“You should have seen her face, Slade, eyes wide, it was so quick, so easy.”
I see the snap, the threads that were straining to hold his sanity in place fragmenting. Ping, ping, ping.
Frost leaps forward, hands out, wrapping around Brenner’s neck. They crash backwards, hitting a table and going straight through it.
I release Prez, not even realizing I was still holding his arm and we all rush to pry Frost off his brother.
He’s in a rage, darkness clouding every rational cell in his brain.
He’s a loose cannon, ready to fire and incinerate everything in its path.
Brenner’s took too much from him, and he’s losing it.
His body thrashes and fights with us all to get back to killing his brother. I catch an elbow to the ribs and a fist to the jaw, and it’s okay. I’d take everything he has to give if it would give him some relief.
A couple of prospects take a boot to their guts and hell has broken loose. He’s the hellhound raining down his fury.
“I’m going to fucking kill you!” he hollers.
Everything falls silent when Prez hits Frost in the back of the head with the butt of his gun. Frost goes limp, and I catch him before he falls to the floor.
“Put him in his room!” Prez orders Slim and Copper before he turns to Brenner and points a finger at him. “You say one more thing and I’ll lock you in that room with him and let him take you apart limb by limb.”
“He can try.” Brenner coughs, holding his ribs.
“Don’t push me!” Prez warns. “I will end you right here.”
“Then we’d never get Rhiannon back,” Brenner retorts.
“Get him out of my sight,” Prez barks, “and let’s get Dice on setting up the trade. Take him to the cage and get a photo for proof of life.”
All other attempts of communication with Buzz have fallen on deaf ears, even trying to lie that we had Brenner by using Brenner’s cell. He wanted proof it was him and we didn’t have any. Now we do though, and I can almost smell Rhi’s perfume.
I grab Brenner’s arm and lead him down the corridor to the room we call the cage. It has no windows and is used as a prison cell of sorts when one of the brothers get out of hand and need a breather instead of a bullet.
“I’d alway
s trade my life for hers,” Brenner tells me as if that gives him any sort of redemption.
“Let’s hope we still can. I’ve searched every inch of this damn planet for places he could be. No one knows where the fuck he has her.”
“I do,” Brenner says.
I stop in my tracks and pin him against the wall, my forearm crushing his windpipe. I ain’t planning games with this motherfucker. “Don’t play games with me,” I warn.
He stares at me, eyes dead. It’s like looking into the very pit of hell and seeing the devil himself looking back at you.
I release him and carry on walking.
“I know where he will have her. Let’s go get her, you and me.” His words are sloppy and his movements sluggish.
“You think I’m seriously going to fall for this shit?” I snort.
Does he think I was born yesterday? I’ve known this little runt far too long to believe anything he says. He’s a trickster.
“Scorch. I’m not lying, I know where he will be. Who knows how long it’s going to take them dipshits to make contact. She could be dead by then. If he thinks it’s a setup, he will just take his revenge out on her. “
“What are you doing?” Darby asks, coming up the corridor. She’s wearing leather from head to toe and looks like the black widow from the Marvel films. Every brother in this place can’t keep his eyes off her but she’s no bitch to be messed with. She has balls and has proved herself more than useful. We may never have gotten Brenner back in one piece if not for her.
“I need you to come with me,” I tell her.
She folds her arms and studies me, her eyes boring right into me and making me squirm. “What’s he told you?” she asks.
“No questions. Yes or no?”
“Are you taking this piece of shit with you?” she asks.
“Who the fuck are you?” Brenner sneers at her.
She’s quick. Pulling her knife and grabbing him by the jaw, she forces his head back with a thud against the wall. Her body crushes his, her knife at his throat. She’s smaller than him but, by fuck, is she tough. Brenner is breathing heavily but entirely under her control.
“I’m another piece of the wreckage you left in your wake when you decided to go rogue,” she spits. Then, low and deadly, she snarls, “You took something of mine from me.”