by Janie Marie
She nodded as Jason came up to her side and took her hand.
“She gets nervous around other people,” Jason told David while he stared at her with a softness she wasn’t used to. Jason smiled, lifting her hand and kissing it. “She stayed home most of the time because she would get so stressed out. People were cruel to her in the past. She always tried, though.” His lips brushed against her hand again before he lowered it. “Don’t worry, babe. I’ll be right there with you, and David’s right, how can they not love you?”
Jane couldn’t stop herself from accepting Jason’s affection after desiring it for so long. She smiled and gave his hand a little squeeze to show her thanks.
“Ah,” Jason cringed, trying to pull his hand free.
Her eyes widened. “Oh, shit! I’m sorry, Jason . . . Are you all right?” She inspected his hand, noticing it was a little red.
He chuckled. “It’s fine. It just surprised me. I guess you won’t need me to open jars anymore.”
Her eyes brightened a bit. “No, I guess not.”
She heard footsteps and turned her head to see David walking away. Her chest felt like someone just clawed it out. No matter what she did, she ended up hurting one of them.
Her eyes got a little glassy, but Jason grabbed her chin and turned her face toward him before she shed a tear. “Come on. Let’s finish getting the kids ready.”
She nodded, and Jason smiled. Then he completely surprised her with a kiss on her lips.
Her eyes went wide as she froze. He didn’t seem to notice how uncomfortable she was, as he simply turned to pick up Natalie.
Jane swallowed as a flurry of chaotic emotions assaulted her. She didn’t know how she was supposed to act or feel. Jason’s last kisses to her had been when she was infected and when he was reunited with her, but before those, he usually only kissed her when he wanted sex, and she just let him . . .
She stared at the floor for a few moments as guilt and sadness pressed in around her. There shouldn’t be a problem with Jason kissing her, but there was. There had been a problem for a long time.
Her eyes burned, but she still turned to the man she felt watching her. David’s normally sapphire eyes were a frozen ocean while his face held none of the warmth she had gotten used to from him.
The urge to apologize to him overwhelmed her, but she could only hold his cold stare until he finally blinked, and those sapphire eyes of his once again warmed her entire body. David finally gave a sweet smile before he turned to speak to Gawain.
“Are you all right, Jane?” Tristan asked, resting his hand on her shoulder.
She smiled. The other knights didn’t talk to her as much as David’s team and Arthur, but she felt a connection with Tristan. His extra ability gave the two of them something in common, and she felt more accepted by him than the other knights.
“I’ll be fine, Tristan. Thank you.”
“Well, do not hesitate to come to one of us if you need something.” When he turned to leave, she noticed he still favored his leg that had been shot with a silver-nitrate bullet.
“Wait,” she said, making him turn around. “Your leg—is it healing?”
He glanced at it and shrugged. “I can feel the silver burning inside me still. I don’t think it will heal anytime soon.” He grinned. “Do not worry over me, though. I grew up receiving all sorts of wounds as a young knight. I will manage.”
Tristan went to leave again, but she grabbed his arm as she continued to stare at his leg.
“Can I try to help you?”
He smiled softly. “Sure, Jane.”
Jane sank down to her knees while she kept her focus on where she knew his wound was. It should be no different from how she fixed David, so she just had to try.
She breathed out slowly and closed her eyes as she lifted her hands over his leg. Just like before, she visualized the silver until she felt her mind connect with everything on and around him. She felt his organs, his breath, and the silver.
Her fingers brushed the fabric of his pants and with only a thought, she heard them rip under her hand. Tristan’s shocked gasp barely touched her ears, but she was already zoned in on the silver, pulling it to her hand.
It gathered in her hand, and she opened her eyes to see a small silver ball swirling in her palm.
“Jane,” Tristan breathed as they both watched his wound closing up.
“Does that feel better?” she asked as she let the connection fade.
“Yes, it feels perfect.” He twisted his leg, inspecting it. “You truly wield an incredible power, Jane. Thank you.”
“Sure,” she said sadly. Her powers came at a price, and she wasn’t sure she was the right person to hold such power.
Tristan frowned and lifted her chin with his finger. “What is it?”
She shrugged. Although she was happy to have helped him, the realization of how different she was dampened any joy that resulted from her abilities. She knew the power inside her was not her own. Something terrible was the true wielder of that power, and while Death had weakened her entity, she knew it was there. Waiting.
“Jane?” Tristan called.
She didn’t respond and listened to him sigh as he took a seat on a cot.
“You should be proud of what you can do,” he said. “You are the reason we all made it on the plane. You’re the reason David is still with us—the reason I no longer feel a fire in my leg.”
“You don’t understand,” she said. “I mean, I’m glad to have helped, and the powers are really cool.”
“Then why do you seem so upset about using them?”
“Tristan.” She hoped she wasn’t making a mistake by confiding in him. “I’m different from everyone else—no one can do what I can. I don’t even know what it is that I’m doing exactly.”
He gave her another smile. “You are special, Jane. What you can do is amazing—you’re manipulating matter. That pretty much means you can do anything. Then you can release energy and harness it enough to create a force field as big as an airfield! That’s incredible.”
“Yeah,” she said, afraid to let him know just how dark her power really was.
“Jane, I want you to tell me if you feel like you are losing control, okay?”
Jane nodded. “Sure.”
“I don’t know what it is that creates your power,” he said quietly. “There are other immortals, besides you and me, who can affect our surroundings, but I have not come across one like you. I would imagine the only one who could take you out in a fair fight would be Death.”
Jane chuckled sadly, but she wondered if it would come down to Death having to truly face her when she was finally beaten by her beast.
“It terrifies you, doesn’t it?”
“Yes.”
“Power can consume anyone.” He watched her for a moment. “It takes a strong mind to control it. I know for certain you are the right person to be given this power. And don’t forget, you have all of us to lean on while you get stronger. When it scares you, run to David. He will help you even if you are more powerful than him.”
Her heart sank. Tristan and the others didn’t understand what she and David were going through. They couldn’t lean on each other anymore. She couldn’t look at Jason or her children without fear of hurting them. Hell, she didn’t even have her pets anymore.
She nearly cried as she remembered her dogs had escaped during the fight. They’d apparently been seen running in her direction, but no one knew what happened to them. Then her cats refused to come near her. Arthur had told her they would come around, that her scent probably didn’t smell right to them, but she knew why they wouldn’t come to her. They knew there was something bad in her.
There was no one for her.
Tristan patted her leg and brought her out of her thoughts. “You’ll get through this. If you need to talk, I’m always happy to listen and offer what advice I can.”
“Thank you, Tristan.” She knew it was pointless to talk to him or anyone, because no
one could help her.
“Good, but let me know if you need anything.” Tristan eyed her for a moment, and she gave him a quick nod. “I have to go finish packing up.”
She waved him off with a smile and watched him walk away before looking over at her kids. They were all smiles as they played together on a cot. Her lip twitched with a faint smile as she watched how much they struggled to move and realized she may have gone a little overboard with all the sweaters under their hoodies.
Jason caught her eye and gestured for her to join him. Jane knew she would have to eventually, but she was too tired to pretend to be happy around him right now.
So she looked away from him, right at David.
It was ridiculous how she always sought him out, but she sighed and kept watching him. He was sitting on a cot alone, but he wasn’t just sitting there relaxing—his eyes were shifting between her and the kids, keeping an eye on them all. It comforted her that he was still trying to be there with her, but the gaping hole she felt in her chest wouldn’t go away.
She swallowed painfully to keep from letting out a cry. Jason’s stare only filled her with dread, but she managed to hide her sadness and anxiety with a fake smile before standing up to join him and her babies. All she had to do was keep her emotions hidden and the world would go on just fine. That was all that mattered. As long as no one else got hurt, she’d keep all her pain locked inside.
Jane clutched the armrest tightly as the van swerved. She stared out the window of one of the five vehicles that carried their party and tried to admire the wilderness around them. It was dark, and the surrounding forest easily blocked the moonlight above, but her enhanced eyesight allowed her to distinguish each towering spruce tree they passed.
Nature had always been something she enjoyed. In fact, she often daydreamed about living away from civilization, even from her family, deep in a forest with only the trees and animals as her company. There she wouldn’t hurt anyone. There she’d be forgotten and everyone’s lives would be better.
She breathed out and leaned her head against the glass. There were so many wonderful people around her now. Her family and the knights. David. Yet, she was terrified of what was about to happen when they reached the knights’ home.
The forest surrounded them no matter which way she looked, but she would not have her daydream of peaceful solitude because she was afraid to meet these new people. Well, vampires.
It wasn’t so much to do with them being mythical creatures that bothered her, but more that they were simply new people who would stare at her. They’d whisper and judge her, she knew already. Whether David thought they’d like her or not was irrelevant. She would always believe people thought the worst of her. The cruelty she’d endured when she was younger didn’t only apply to her youth; adults were just as quick to cast judgement before getting the facts, and Jane knew it would hurt just as much as it did when she was a kid.
The calmness she felt with the knights, and the playful way she acted with them, wasn’t the norm for her. That was why she enjoyed being around them. For the most part, they seemed to accept her into their circle. She didn’t have to worry about a woman saying nasty things or trying to fit in with a group of them who she had nothing in common with.
She didn’t know what bothered her most: feeling pathetic for being excluded, or pathetic because when she was included, it was out of pity or a cruel joke.
How was she supposed to handle meeting a group of immortal women who likely admired David? Why was it so easy for people to fit in with others and not her? Why couldn’t she just do what Jason wanted, and just get better? He was an asshole, but he fit in.
She chuckled sadly at her thoughts and continued staring out her window while she got lost in memories of all the times she was laughed at by girls, and the panic attacks she’d suffered from simply having to go out in public.
David watched Jane through the mirror visor in front of him. He knew sitting next to her in the van would not be a good idea, but he refused to ride separately from her. He could feel the anxiety rolling off of her in waves. It had been building to dangerous heights since they parted ways, and he was going mad with the helplessness of the situation.
He shifted his gaze over to Jason. Her husband was sitting right beside her, but he showed no reaction to the distress she was in. It wasn’t that Jason was doing that on purpose either—he just wasn’t concerned with her. It irritated David to the point that he wanted to bleed him dry. Stupid bastard doesn’t deserve her.
A throat cleared behind him. He knew it was Arthur before he even looked. David clenched his jaw but nodded as his fangs receded. He hated that there was always something keeping him from being with Jane. It didn’t make any sense to him. She needed him, and there was nothing he could do for her. He briefly wondered if he should just say, to hell with it, and take her from Jason. Obviously Death didn’t have a problem doing whatever was necessary to make her happy. Why couldn’t he do the same?
Jane’s nervous voice stopped him from answering his own question. “Arthur, where are we exactly?”
Arthur answered, “We’re in the south-east part of the Yukon Territory. It’s part of the Boreal Forest and is fairly isolated. The nearest town is Watson Lake. We go there from time to time, but otherwise, everything we need is available at home.”
“But how is it that no one knows you are vampires?”
David smiled. He knew she was probably dying to learn more about them, but she was too consumed by everything else right now.
“Well, we don’t actually mingle with the mortals too often,” Arthur said. “There are quite a few who live with us. Their families have been with us for generations—most are from my original kingdom. The newer humans have chosen to aid our cause. They handle most of our issues with mortals. Many of them are donors as well.
“As far as the population around us, most towns in this region of Canada are low. If someone were to come along, my kingdom would be mistaken for any other small town nearby. There are enough humans here to help us remain hidden.” He pointed to the trees. “We are taking the private entrance instead of driving through the village. But when you see it later, it will be easy to understand how we manage secrecy.”
Jane peered back out the window, ending the conversation.
David silently asked Arthur if he knew what was going on with her. Arthur’s only response was a quick shake of his head, but he mouthed, “Stay close to her.”
David turned his attention back to her. She was lost in her head. Not like she had been before, where she was hidden even from herself. Now she was torturing herself. Baby, don’t do this to yourself.
It tore him up to watch her inflict this suffering on herself for the sake of her shitty marriage. He refused to break them up—she had made her choice, and he had to respect her decision.
As he watched her suddenly sit up, he glanced out the window quickly, expecting a threat. When he saw there was none, he looked back, surprised to see her smiling as she continued to stare outside.
He noticed there were snow flurries falling through the trees. He smiled and returned his gaze to Jane. Her eyes were glued to the snow. It hardly measured half an inch on the ground, but she stared out in awe as the flakes swirled past her window.
“Mommy, it’s snowing!” Natalie squealed.
Jane grinned wider; it was the loveliest sight for David. She looked like a young girl without any worries.
She pulled Nathan on her lap and pointed outside. “Look, Nathan. Snow.”
Nathan touched the glass. “Snow.”
David grinned until Jason leaned closer to them. He sighed. This is how it would be from now on.
Jane was so distracted by the snow she had started to forget her troubles, but they all came back when their van drove through the tree line and out from under the canopy of towering evergreens.
Every time she ever fantasized about King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table, she envisioned Camelot. Her imagination need
ed some improvement because the fairytale castle they were driving to was far more beautiful and magical than she could have ever dreamed of.
It was all lit up in the darkness with torches. The firelight caused the snow clinging to the statues, roof tops, and the trimmed bushes, to shimmer like diamonds.
Jane smiled. I’m in Camelot.
As they drew closer, her smile faltered at the sight of the crowd standing at the bottom of the steps that led to the castle’s main doors. Of course, she knew there were thirteen knights, which meant twelve wives since David was the only one not married.
The wives were easy to pick out as they huddled together waving and smiling. Jane was happy they got to finally come home to their wives, but she couldn’t stop the grimace from crossing her face when she noticed the gorgeous gowns and floor-length designer coats they wore.
She assessed her dirty jeans and David’s jacket. Just like always, she was a pathetic little outsider. She resembled a bum. There was probably blood still stuck on her face, and more tangles in her hair than she’d ever had before.
As Jane looked back at the group awaiting them, her gaze drifted to three women who stood separate from everyone else. They looked like goddesses, and they exuded confidence Jane didn’t have. They immediately brought back memories of the popular girls teasing her.
She tried not to let herself get stuck in the past, but something about the blonde in the center filled her with dread. The woman’s wicked emerald eyes were set on their van alone. The way she looked at it hungrily made Jane swallow and look at David. He didn’t appear to have any unease. Actually, he had a small smile on his face. She tried to shake the unsettling feeling this woman instilled in her, but it only grew stronger the closer they got.
As the van slowed, Jane kept her eyes on the intimidating blonde. The possessive way she stared at the van made it seem like something inside was hers.