by Gina Henning
I press end. I didn’t say good on purpose. I miss him so much. I have never experienced anything like this before. This heart-aching sadness from being apart and the reverse of being head over heels pangs in my heart with every thought of him that crosses my mind. I hope he makes good on his promise and offers an actual solution to our long-distance relationship. I’m not sure how much longer I can hold out on this.
***
With Jack’s advice in mind I decided to bring my original candidates to Javier’s office as soon as I arrived at work. I tap on his door. There is a slight worry of Elaine being in his office with him. Javier opens the door and his office is empty. Good.
“Hey Javier…good morning.”
“Good morning, how was your first day?”
“Good. I wanted to give you my candidate list.”
He waves for me to have a seat and I hand him the paper with all of my original candidates listed.
“Are these the people you and Elaine decided on?”
“No, these are the candidates, I chose. I appreciate her input, but since this is my team, I think it’s best that I choose them. After all, I’m the one who will have to work with them, not Elaine.” I’m channeling Jack and it makes me feel confident.
Javier’s face forms into a duck expression and he nods. “I’m proud of you. This is another example of you being the right person to lead this team.”
“Thanks, Javier.” I nod, pleased I’d listened to Jack’s advice.
“Okay then, go get your team up and running. I expect great things from you.” Javier turns to his computer, effectively dismissing me.
I stand up smiling and exit his office. Now that my list is chosen, I’ve got to plan out how I’m going to lead my team. I take a deep breath. It’s going to be a long week.
***
Finally it’s Friday. I’m sitting at my desk viewing my Excel spreadsheet filled with numbers that lead into more numbers. After my meeting with Javier, I took all of these digits and formulated equations to help determine the positives and negatives for each member of my team. I now have the route to go down with them and I’m hopeful that it will be a success.
I’ve also managed to avoid Elaine for a couple of days. Surprising, considering I figured I’d hear about it after she learned I hadn’t taken her suggestions, but so far so good. I glance at the clock on my screen. It’s five after five, almost time for me to leave.
Little spurs of excitement form all over my arms and legs. I cannot wait to see Jack. I’ve been anticipating this day since Sunday when I kissed him goodbye at the airport, which was a bit awkward as my entire family was there. I couldn’t help it; I wanted to kiss him one last time and we are engaged. It wasn’t a major PDA, but it was worth it. He has the most kissable lips I’ve ever seen or tasted. I close my eyes. Mmm…not long before my daydream will become a reality. My chest tightens.
My daydream is interrupted by knocking at my door. I shake my head and roll the chair back. I make my way to the door and another knock taps before I can turn the knob. Impatient much? Who could it possibly be?
I open the door.
“Hey Lauren, can we talk?” Leena asks, as she pushes the door open.
“Sure, what’s up?” I motion for her to have a seat.
“Well gosh, um how do I say this?” Leena taps her fingers over her lips.
I glance at the clock. It’s ten after five.
“What is it, Leena?”
“Why didn’t you choose me for your team?” Leena glares at me. Her normally brown eyes have a red flare to them.
I inspect her face and stare directly into her eyes. “Leena, I think you’re a great employee and I value you here at Calstone Corp. Considering this and since we have been cubicle mates for the past year, I think it would be best if you stayed on Javier’s team.”
Leena rolls her eyes. “Right. So you think I’m great, but not good enough for your team?” Leena shakes her head and stands up. “Well you’ll regret this. I’ve seen your list.” She laughs as she exits my office.
Wow. I hope she doesn’t end up on an episode of Killer Women; the anger in her eyes was beyond creepy. It’s now twenty after five—definitely time to leave. I shut my computer down and grab my purse from my drawer.
I’ve got forty minutes to make it to the airport and fall into Jack’s arms. And I’m ready to fall hard. It has been a killer week and that was before psycho-Leena walked into my office. I shake my head as I make my way to the elevator.
Elaine is striding down the aisle in my direction. Argh. Is it possible to exit the building without another confrontation? From the look on Elaine’s face, I’m going with not likely.
“Hey Lauren, I’m so glad I caught you.” Elaine grabs on to my arm.
“Ha, literally.” I eye her hand and then our eyes meet. She holds onto my arm for a second longer before she releases it.
“I haven’t seen you for a couple of days.”
“Yes, I’ve been busy organizing my new team.”
Elaine laughs. “Yes, so I’ve heard. I was talking to Javier…you know we talk every day. I mean…I think he has me on speed dial. Probably before his wife.” She laughs again.
I frown slightly. “I bet she wouldn’t appreciate that.” I stare at her.
“Huh…ah maybe not, but who cares? Listen, Javier told me you went with your original candidates and…though I appreciate the boldness…I think you’re making a decision that you will regret.” She flutters her eyelashes at me.
“Well, it is my decision, but I appreciate your concern,” I flat line my lips, wondering if this woman has ever shown any genuine concern in her life. “I’d love to chat more about this, but I’ve got an appointment.”
There is no way I’m going to mention Jack to her. I can only imagine the digging that will follow.
“An appointment, after five on a Friday? That’s odd. Who is it with?”
“Just an appointment.” I smile and press the down button on the elevator.
“Oh dear, it’s nothing medically related is it?” The false sweetness oozes from her voice.
“Nope, not medical.” I sigh as the elevator doors open. Yes. I couldn’t wait a second longer before I opted for the stairs. Which honestly I should opt for. I’ve got to figure out a way to be more active.
I step into the elevator and Elaine does as well.
“Well if it’s not medical what is it?” Elaine touches my arm. “Is it mental?”
“What?” I shake my head.
“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to pry, but if you need to talk, I’m here.” She digs into her purse and pulls out a card, pushing it into my hand. “Here, this is my guy. He’s fabulous, and tell him I sent you. Trust me, this guy can fix whatever is going on up there.” She points to my forehead.
The elevator door opens and I make a hasty exit. “Thanks, I’ve got to run. Have a great weekend.” I call over my shoulder.
“You too, sweetie. And give me a ring if you need anything.” Elaine winks at me.
What the French toast was that about?
I can’t even begin to contemplate that situation. I rush to my car and hop in. My desire to see Jack has only increased tenfold. I turn the key and back out of my parking space. I can’t get out of this garage and the same breathing space as Elaine fast enough. My heart is beating rapidly, like I just sprinted a mile or something. I pucker my lips and let out a deep breath. Calm down, Lauren, you don’t want to be frazzled when you see Jack. Mmm…Jack. My stomach flip-flops with butterflies of excitement.
The traffic is stop and go downtown and my heart is stopping at every pause to consider the reality of being with Jack in less than an hour. My office is located about twenty minutes from the airport. Getting onto the highway takes the longest amount of time, but finally I’m cruising down the 695 with the heat blasting on my seats. The leather is cold from sitting in the garage. As I’m about to exit, the seat is finally warming my legs enough to dampen the shiver.
I steer my car into the parking garage and find a spot on the fifth level. I hop out and rush to the elevator. Being in a darkened parking garage is nothing I look forward to. I tap my foot as I wait for the elevator to arrive. My phone shows its 6:00 p.m. Jack’s plane should be pulling in to the gates. I tense. It’s almost as if time has been standing still since I left him at the airport in Texas a week ago. So much has happened for me here at work, but all of it seems to be washed away as if my life doesn’t exist without him in it.
The elevator door opens and a man is standing in the back corner. Great. His baseball cap is lowered over his eyes. Even better. I push the level one button and dig in my purse for my phone. Time to play chat.
“Oh hey, yes I’m in the elevator. See you in two seconds. I know…yes. Elevator Five. Perfect.”
The door opens and I stride out. I hustle my way across the crosswalk and into Terminal A. I wouldn’t be surprised if Jack is already standing at the luggage carousel. I already checked out which one his flight would be circling. But since he is only staying a couple of nights, he might not even have packed luggage.
I stalk over to the suitcases circling on the metal machine. I scan the group of passengers to see if I can find Jack. And I can’t find him. I make my way through the crowd and loop the entire group. He isn’t here. I swallow. My chest tightens. I glance up at the flight number on the board. It’s his flight. This is the right spot. I bite my lip and circle the carousel once more. There is absolutely no sign of him. My heart begins to flutter as panic starts to set in. Shiat. Did he not make the flight?
I can’t believe it. The last time I came to pick him up from the airport he was a no-show. Followed by a long time with no word.
Please tell me this is not happening again.
Why? I don’t understand. I stumble towards a column and lean up against it. Take a deep breath, Lauren. It’s possible he’s in the bathroom or maybe I missed him during my circles? I seriously doubt it. But maybe I did. I let out a long deep breath. My cell phone vibrates in my purse.
Another deep breath passes from my lips. I’m almost afraid to check my phone. What if it’s a text message from Jack like last time, where he said “something came up” and he couldn’t make it. I let out another deep breath and swipe my phone.
“I’m sorry, Lauren, something came up. I couldn’t—”
I don’t even finish reading the message. I throw my phone back into my purse. I cannot believe this. Are you freaking kidding me? Is this a joke? If so it’s a sick one. I fight back my tears as I charge to the exit doors.
My flight is halted as two big strong arms wrap themselves around me.
“Lauren, I’m here.” Jack breathes into my ear.
I twist my body around to stare at him. My sorrow has turned to rage. I shove him. He doesn’t even budge.
“Jack, that is so so so not cool.” I swipe back a tear.
“Oh, Lauren, I thought you would think it was funny. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.” Jack pulls me in close to him and kisses my head. He wipes underneath my eyes. “Dammit, I had no idea you would take me seriously.” He kisses my head again. “I thought for sure you would know it was a joke.”
I shake my head. “Why would I think it’s a joke? The last time I was here to pick you up from the airport I got the same message.” I eye the ground. I want to fall into a hole and not be here in this moment. I feel like a fool. I shouldn’t have overreacted.
“I know and I’m sorry, truly.” Jack pulls my chin up. “Lauren, I promise I will never stand you up again.” He kisses me deeply. His hands are in my hair and I let my arms wrap around his body. His amazing scent of sandalwood and apples invades my senses. I’m immediately at ease. I’m dancing in the air. Jack is here. I’m in his arms. His big muscular arms. Arms that wrap me up and make everything better.
I pull back from his mouth. “Let’s get out of here. Did you check any bags?” I eye his book bag.
“I travel light.” Jack picks me up in his arms. “You’re the only thing I need.”
I laugh. “Jack, put me down.” I’m aware of the other passengers who are ogling us. But it is quite a thrill to be in the air and in his arms. Especially since my last trip to the airport had left me empty-handed and depressed.
Jack sets me on the ground, but I still keep walking on air. He grabs my hand and our fingers link together as we exit the airport terminal and enter the cold air.
I’m anything but chilled. Jack has warmed me all over with a kiss from his lips and now the grasp of his hand. We hustle to the car and I beep my key fob to unlock the door. Jack opens the driver door.
“Do you want me to drive?” He stares down into my eyes.
I crinkle my eyebrows. “You don’t know where we’re going.”
“Lauren, I’ve been to your house before.”
“Right, but I seriously doubt you would be able to remember how to get there.” I toss my hair over my shoulder.
“That’s why I have a co-pilot.” Jack taps my nose.
I hold up my keys. “If you want to drive, you have to do it blind.” I raise an eyebrow at him. “As in no GPS and no Lauren.”
“No Lauren—sweetheart, you know I’d never leave you alone in a dark parking garage.” He grabs the keys from my hand and leads me to the passenger side. Jack opens the door and slides me into the seat. He leans in really close to me. “I’ll take your challenge.”
The door shuts and I roll my eyes. He is so arrogant. I almost hope he gets lost. Not that I want to be lost. But just so he can be knocked off his pompous ass.
Jack turns on the keys and backs out of the parking spot.
“So how was your flight?” I purse my lips to the side. I’m going to talk the entire trip even if it’s nonsense. I’m convinced the added jibber jabber will distract him enough to hinder his success in making it home.
“It was really great, Lauren.” He cocks his head to the side and nods with too much emphasis.
“Oh cool, that’s good to hear. And the food, did you have dinner?” I flutter my eyelashes at him.
“No, unfortunately they didn’t feed us.” Jack feasts his eyes on me. “But it’s okay, they wouldn’t have served anything to my interest.” He winks at me.
I roll my eyes. “Oh why is that, no Chinese?” I laugh.
“Yeah, I doubt they serve Moo Gai Lauren on the plane.” He smirks at me.
I roll my lips. “I haven’t eaten yet either,” falls from my mouth.
“Do you want to pick up some takeout or would you rather be served?” Jack gazes at me. His icy blues are digging in deep to my brain and wandering down my body, tugging at my heated zones.
I blink my eyes. “I wouldn’t mind going out for something to eat.” I raise an eyebrow at him.
“All right, I’ll take you out. How about Indian?”
I jerk my head back. “Mmm curry. Yes.”
Jack clicks on the blinker and we exit the highway. Does he even know where he’s going? This is only the second time he’s visited me and the last time was a pretty limited weekend. We picked up Chinese and went to breakfast, but that’s it for dining spots.
I cannot believe it. The car slows and Jack is pulling up in front of Mantras. One of my favorite Indian restaurants.
“How did you know about this place?” I scrutinize his face and stare directly at him. I want to pull the answers from his mind. How could he know?
“Good question, Lauren. I’m going to let you in on a secret, but you have to promise to keep it between the two of us.” He inspects me, waiting for a response.
This is silly. But I oblige. “Yes, I’ll keep it a secret.”
Jack leans in to my ear and whispers, “Google.”
My shoulders slump and I groan. I can’t roll my eyes back far enough. “Haha. Fine.”
I unbuckle my seat belt but before I can lift the handle on the door Jack is pulling it open.
“Come on, let’s experience an array of flavors.” Jack pulls me in
close to him and kisses my lips. I almost melt. But it’s cold and though I’m heated, I’m not a puddle. Jack leads me to the restaurant and we enter through the dark door.
***
We’re back at my house and after my third glass of wine I run my eyes over Jack’s face. His eyes are full of worry. He looks exhausted.
“I don’t understand. Why you don’t hire a manager to replace Sherry?” I sip my wine.
Jack runs a hand through his blond hair. He takes a gulp of his wine and places it on my coffee table. “Lauren, would you consider coming back to Texas and helping me run Vintage Estates?”
I blink several times. After Sherry took off with all the money from Vintage Estates, and then some, I had helped Jack get things somewhat settled over Christmas. His Aunt Minnie had transferred a large sum of money to help get Vintage Estates sorted financially and I’d helped organize all of the accounts and bills. He had asked then if I would stay, but I told him I couldn’t because of my promotion and that was before he asked me to marry him.
“Jack…I can’t. I just started my new position. It would jeopardize everything I’ve been working towards to leave it.” I wipe a hair off my face.
He shakes his head. “I know, I’m sorry for asking. I just…it would make things so much easier if you were at my side.” Jack pulls me into his lap.
I bite my lip. Shiat. This is so difficult. My heart is screaming at me, telling me to say yes and rush off to help Jack and Vintage Estates. But my brain has thrown a big foot down and blared veto power music in my mind. Leaving my job right now would be career suicide. I can’t and won’t do it. It’s just not right. I owe my business-self more than just to rush off with some guy. Argh…but he isn’t just some guy…he’s Jack and we’re supposed to be getting married.
One of us will have to budge. One of us will have to move. Why shouldn’t it be me? I swallow. But why shouldn’t it be him?
“Listen, I really want to…but it just doesn’t make sense businesswise for me.” I bite the inside of my cheek. That was a really callous thing to say. “I mean…it would be suicide for my career.”
Jack leans forward and pours more wine into our glasses. He takes a long sip. “You’re right and I’m proud of you for not buckling. It might be the easiest option but it doesn’t mean it’s the right one. I’ll figure something out.” He puts his wineglass down on my coffee table and places his hand on the back of my head.