But all that came out of my mouth was one word.
“You!” I said.
Anger filled my voice, a fury that sounded harsh, even to me.
The man looked slightly taken aback.
It was probably the most visible reaction I’d ever seen on him.
Maybe it was my tone of voice, or something in my face, but he seemed entirely at a loss for words as he looked at me, even more than he had on the plane. Unlike ponytail guy, he looked pretty much exactly the same as he had that morning, down to the same jacket, T-shirt and dark pants. His black hair looked damp though, like he’d gotten out of the shower pretty recently. If anything, the wetter look emphasized that angular face and those light eyes even more. His narrow mouth pursed in a frown as he looked me over.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” I said. “What do you want from me?”
He continued to stare at me, his face close to expressionless.
He didn’t let go of my arm.
“Are you looking for your pal?” I snapped. I was trying to get a reaction out of him, I guess, any reaction. “…Because he already did the creepy stalker thing tonight. Are you guys taking turns? Did he pass the mantle to you for the rest of the evening?”
The man’s eyes narrowed, growing openly wary.
I pulled away, meaning to push past him, but he tightened his hold.
“Where?” The German accent surprised me again, audible even when he spoke over the sound of the band. “Where did he go?”
I jerked back, and that time, his fingers released me.
Staring up at him, I found it was me who was at a loss for words.
Remembering what I’d just left, I clenched my jaw, closing my eyes before I averted my gaze. Looking back at him, I felt another surge of fury, that time, hotter than I could control. Without thought, I shoved at him, hitting him in the middle of the chest with my palm.
In that instant, I completely forgot he might be a SCARB agent. It never even crossed my mind how completely stupid it was to lay a hand on him.
He barely budged from my shove, but I saw his eyes widen.
He looked down at where I’d shoved him, a bewildered look on his face.
“Just leave me the hell alone, all right?” I clenched my hands, fighting the impulse to shove him again. Hell, some part of me wanted to hit him. “I didn’t do anything. I’m not religious. I’m not political. I don’t know jack shit about Third Mythers. I’m not interested in being your bait for some kind of sting operation. So whatever the hell you want, whatever bullshit game this is… leave me out of it. I have my own problems.”
His expression didn’t move. He might have blinked.
Something about my complete inability to read him infuriated me more.
I was about to walk away before I hit him again, when someone else grabbed my shoulder from behind, forcing me to turn.
That time, it was the absolute last person I wanted to see.
Jaden stood there, panting, like he’d run to catch up with me. Now he scanned my face and eyes, and for the second time, I saw fear in his expression. That fear turned rapidly to anger while I watched, maybe in self-defense.
Even seeing that, I was caught off-guard by his words.
“Trust you to walk in at just the wrong time!” he snapped.
For a moment I could only stare at him.
I swung before I’d thought, but my fist and arm were abruptly stopped, mid-arc. I turned, looking behind me, stunned to see the black-haired man with those crystal eyes holding my wrist. He’d just stopped me from hitting Jaden.
His expression didn’t move as I glared up at him.
He released my wrist after a bare instant, startling me when he spoke.
“Surveillance,” he said.
That was it. One word.
Staring at him incredulously, I fought with how to reply, how to even make sense of what he’d just done. Then I gave up, turning my back on him to glare at Jaden. Once I faced my supposed boyfriend, I couldn’t decide if I was glad I hadn’t hit him or not.
Regardless, I wasn’t up for this conversation.
I couldn’t even think coherently, not standing between these two.
“Get away from me, Jaden,” I said. “Now.”
He barely seemed to hear me.
“Did you just take a swing at me?” Jaden stared at me, incredulous, his mouth ajar. “Jesus Christ, Allie. What is the matter with you?” He glared at the man standing behind me. “And who the fuck is this guy?”
I stared at him. “Really? You’re asking me that right now? Who he is? He’s the guy who just saved you from having to go onstage with a black eye, Jaden.”
“Do you know him?” Jaden said. “Who the hell is he?”
“No… I don’t fucking know him, all right? And I can’t believe you’re asking me this right now. Are you really so desperate to make this about me?”
Jaden gave the guy behind me another openly angry look, then focused back on me.
Exhaling, he put his hands on his hips.
“Allie… look. I’m sorry, all right? But your timing really sucks, you know that? What the hell were you doing back there, anyway? Checking up on me?”
I stared at him. “You really are, aren’t you? You’re really trying to turn this around on me.”
“I’m not trying to turn anything around on you––”
“You must really think I’m an idiot. Or a complete fucking doormat––”
“Goddamn it, Allie! Do you have to be so melodramatic? All I meant was, your timing could not have been worse. What you saw, I know how it looked––”
“How it looked.” I let out a disbelieving sound. “Wow. I call you on your manipulative crap, and you just keep going. So tell me, Jaden. Just what was it about my timing that was so bad? Did I ruin the mood? I’m sure it would have been much better if I walked in ten minutes later, when her mouth was on your dick…”
“Jesus! Exaggerate much? It was one kiss! I was mad at you. It didn’t mean anything!”
“Don’t.” I stared at him, my voice cold. “Don’t you dare pretend I’m just some girl you’ve been dating a few months who’s overreacting… like this kind of thing has ever been okay for either of us. You’re the one who said if you ever caught me out like that, it was over for us. You made it crystal clear what the rules were. For me, at least.”
He looked about to say something, then didn’t, shutting his mouth.
“Fine,” he said, shoving his hands in his pockets. “But it still didn’t mean anything. I’m sorry I did it, and I’m sorry you saw it, but it was nothing. I'm sorry, okay?”
I bit my lip hard enough to taste blood. “Well. I guess we’re cool, then.”
When I tried to walk away, he stopped me, grabbing my shoulder.
“Allie!” The anger leached out of his voice. “I’m sorry! I really am. But it was nothing. You just walked in at a really bad time… that’s all it was.”
“Sure. Okay,” I said. “No problem, Jay.”
I tried to pull away, but he wouldn’t let go of my arm. When he tightened his grip more, I yanked my elbow back, hard… hard enough that I staggered a little, nearly falling into the tall man with the black hair standing behind me.
I looked up at him in surprise. I’d pretty much forgotten he was there.
Now I kind of wondered why he hadn’t walked away.
He was looking between Jaden and me, his face expressionless, eyes narrow. I wondered if he’d stayed to make sure I didn’t try to punch Jaden a second time.
His gaze rested on mine a beat longer, and I saw some kind of feeling skate over the surface of those glass-like eyes. It wasn’t bewilderment, or that flat, emotionless thing he normally projected––but it wasn't exactly empathy, either. I had no idea what the expression meant. Maybe he was just thinking that I was drunk. Or pathetic. Or both.
At that point, I didn’t care.
That heat of anger still coiled in my chest.
F
rom the denser wave I’d felt backstage, it had grown into a duller pain, throbbing a low note in my chest. I couldn’t think straight. I felt sick, embarrassed, angry.
I was also still drunk enough that using this guy to make a point almost seemed like a good idea.
Leaning up, I caught hold of his black hair in my fingers. I pulled his mouth down to mine without thought, the same way I’d hit him a few minutes earlier.
The kiss probably surprised him more than my shoving him did.
He didn’t act surprised, though.
He followed the tug of my fingers easily enough.
His warm lips found mine, startling me more for how yielding they were, how easily they parted. His tongue slid into my mouth without prompting, and he fell into the kiss easier still, almost like he’d been waiting for it.
I’d barely gotten my brain around what I was doing when his arm curled around my back, pulling me tight against him. His fingers wrapped around my bare side below the cropped lace top and he kissed me harder, right about when I might have been thinking about letting him go.
That time, he slowed as he went; I could almost feel him consciously controlling things, forcing me to move with him.
The kiss turned sensual, deeper.
He gripped me tighter in his hands, using more tongue, inhaling me with every breath, coaxing me to mirror what he did. His mouth had a kind of smoky, honey taste, but he didn’t taste like cigarettes exactly.
By the time he was done with that second kiss, I’d pretty much forgotten why I'd started this.
My body was starting to hurt.
It was the strangest sensation. It wasn’t like the anger-pain I’d felt, but something about it meshed with that, amplified it maybe. I found myself thinking that pain was coming from him, but it didn't make me want to pull away.
I realized in the next breath it was turning me on.
He gasped against my mouth, pausing long enough to look at me.
“Fuck,” he muttered.
He kissed me a third time, and by the end of that one, I was leaning into him, my arm sliding around his waist under the black coat he wore. When my fingers gripped the back of his belt, he let out a low sound, his hands tightening until I could barely breathe.
The pain coming off him worsened. That time, it was me who gasped.
He kissed me again, his hand and fingers stroking my spine.
When I finally ended it, it took me a few seconds to disentangle myself. Then I was resting back on my feet, standing a yard or so away from where he stood.
For a few breaths, I could only stare at him.
The black-haired man’s expression hadn’t changed.
I could see him breathing a little harder under the coat. I saw his eyes flicker to my mouth. I got a fleeting impression that he hadn’t wanted to stop, that he might even be thinking about kissing me again.
Tearing my eyes off that pale, catlike gaze, I found Jaden staring at me, his expression a dark mask. I don’t think I’d ever seen him so shocked, or so angry.
Both things turned into a colder fury as I watched.
“Don’t know him, huh?” he said, his voice harsh. “Go fuck yourself, Alyson.”
Before I could pull my head together enough to answer, he turned around, and pushed his way violently back through the crowd, heading towards the left side of the stage. I knew where he was going. Back to wherever his band was getting ready for the show, and likely back to where pouty lips was waiting for him.
I let him go.
I didn’t even have it in me to feel bad about it.
When I finally turned around, looking for the black-haired man, he was gone.
17
CHANGE OF PLANS
“ALLIE!” JON FOUGHT to grab my arm as I walked past.
When I didn’t slow down, he lunged off the stool, and caught hold of me again, bringing me back to his seat before he lost it.
“Allie! What the hell was that? Who was that guy?”
“Jon, seriously.” I shook my head, trying to disentangle my arm. “Not now, okay?”
“What the hell were you doing? It looked like the two of you…” Jon paused, flushing a little. “Jesus, Al. Are you having an affair?”
When I only bit my lip, shaking my head, I saw him staring at my face. Seeing the scrutiny in his eyes, I started to push past him again, but he held onto my arm.
I found myself wishing I’d just gone out the back alley, through the kitchen.
“Jon,” I said. “I’m not having an affair, okay?”
“What’s wrong?” he said, loud over the sound of the overhead music. “Did Jaden do something?”
I glanced at the stage, realizing for the first time that the opening band had finished playing, which was why they were piping in one of the indie music feeds. They had a screen set up on the back wall showing liquid visuals in three-dimensional holograms for the sound.
Eye of Morris would be going on in a few minutes. I really didn’t want to be there when Jaden walked out on that stage.
Frowning at Jon, I tried to pull my head together enough to answer him. I didn’t have the energy to come up with some story, so I just told him the truth.
“I saw Jaden with that groupie,” I said, leaning closer so I wouldn’t have to shout it at him. “Kissing her. You know––Tina. The one who sat with him on the plane.”
“Aw, shit, Al. I’m sorry.”
I shrugged. “Not like you and Cass didn’t already think it was happening.” I gave him a humorless smile. “You should have a good year or two of ‘I told you so’s’ you can fling my way now. So. Silver lining.”
He winced. “Al, we never meant it like that. You know we didn’t.”
I shook my head, dismissing my own words. “Forget it. That was supposed to be a joke. I can’t pull off the humor thing right now.”
Jon hesitated, looking out over the dance floor, maybe for Cass.
He looked back at me a second later.
“Who was that you kissed?”
I frowned again, shaking my head. “Does it matter? That was just me being pathetic. Trying to even the score, like we’re all in high school again.” I sighed, combing my fingers through my hair as I leaned on the bar. “I wanted to hurt Jaden. I didn’t much care how.”
Jon frowned, glancing back in the direction from which I’d come, as if seeing the whole thing all over again in his head.
“It didn’t look like that, Al,” he said finally. “It looked like…” His lips pursed. “Well, it looked like you two were about to go at it right there. I don’t blame Jaden for being freaked. It looked like you knew that guy… like you’d kissed him before.”
He paused, as if waiting for me to provide additional information.
When I didn’t, he prompted,
“You sure you don’t?” he said. “…Know that guy, Allie?”
I made a disgusted sound. “No more than you do.” At Jon’s puzzled look, I shook my head, shifting so that my belly rested on the bar. “I’m surprised you didn’t recognize him. It was Simon. Our friend from SCARB. My ‘white knight,’ as you and Cass call him.”
Jon’s eyes widened in alarm. “What? What the hell is he doing here?”
I shrugged. “I have no idea. I yelled at him, hit him… then kissed him. I’m pretty sure he decided I was batshit crazy after that, and left.”
“You’re sure it was him?”
I gave him a flat look. “Is that a serious question?”
“You hit him?” Jon still seemed to be catching up with everything I’d said. “Jesus, Al. I get that he’s cute, but why the hell would you kiss him? Are you nuts?”
I shrugged. “He was there. I didn’t really expect him to go along with it like that.”
Hesitating, I thought about telling him I’d seen Ponytail earlier, too, then decided that would only freak Jon out more.
Biting my lip, I forced a sigh.
“Look, just forget it,” I said. “You and Cass stay, watch the show.
I know Cass wants to see the headliners. I’m thinking I might just leave. I’m worried about going to the hotel after all the crap today, so I thought I’d grab a robo-taxi to the airport. I’ll grab the first flight out, even if it means some credit debt. Or I’ll get another hotel, if I can’t do that.”
“Alone?” Jon said. The alarm on his face grew more pronounced. “Allie, no. Cass and I will go with you.”
I shook my head. “That’s really not necessary––”
“The hell it’s not!”
“Jon.” I gave him a level look. “I don’t want to be with anyone else right now. I know you mean well, but I really think you and Cass should stay. I feel like I’ve overstayed my New York welcome.” I muttered, “I never should have come here.”
Jon was already shaking his head.
“Allie, you don’t have the luxury to be alone right now. Not with those notes, and not with what happened today. Not with some obsessed SCARB agent following you around.” His expression grew uncomfortable. “…A SCARB agent who really seems to want to take you home with him, Al. What if he follows you to the airport? What if he follows you on the plane again?”
Hearing the overprotective tone creeping into his voice, I shook my head.
“I really don’t think he will, Jon. He came here for those guys, not me.”
“How the hell would you know that?” Thinking, Jon frowned, shaking his head. “No, that doesn’t make any sense. If he’s following those guys and not you, what the hell is he doing here? Tonight? You’re not going to tell me that’s a coincidence, him being at this club? Now? Even apart from what he just did…”
Again, Jon trailed, as if trying to decide how to describe what it was the SCARB agent had just done.
I exhaled, biting my lip.
Shaking my head, I sighed again. “So what do you want me to do? Call the cops? Get a police escort to the airport?” I looked at him. “If SCARB wants me, there isn’t a lot I can do about it, Jon. There’s no where I can go to get away from them.”
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