She shrugged. “Hey, I’m just the babysitter. What do I know about kids’ schedules, rigid or otherwise?”
He followed her into the great room, where Micah watched TV, apparently mesmerized. Drew went over and ruffled the boy’s hair. “Hey, kid.”
Micah glanced up but didn’t smile. “Hi.”
Drew went to the breakfast bar and pulled out the stool next to Kat’s. “I’ve been doing some reading and the books recommend a consistent routine.”
She rolled her eyes. “Annie’s getting to you, isn’t she? Next, she’ll have you working on a spreadsheet plotting out the next twenty years of Micah’s life.”
Drew smiled, but felt as if he was being disloyal. “Annie is…meticulous.”
“Well, that’s why you’ll be good for her. Get her to loosen up.”
“Is that why you’re doing this? Going out of your way to make things easier for me?”
“I’m not doing it for you. I’m doing it for her. And for him.” She nodded toward Micah. “Besides, I feel responsible for the whole predicament. I’m the one who had the bright idea to set you two up. Hence, my godson was conceived. Great kid, not so great circumstances.”
“Yeah, but I should have had more self-control. And Annie…well, she seemed…enthusiastic at the time.”
“But I pushed her to step outside her box. ‘Live a little,’ I told her. ‘Quit fixating on plans and stay in the moment for once.’”
“Hmm. Annie doesn’t seem very easily manipulated to me. Did it ever occur to you she was simply overwhelmed by her attraction to me?”
She eyed him up and down. “Don’t flatter yourself, stud. You’re attractive in a boy-next-door-meets-gymrat kind of way. But Annie didn’t describe it as love at first sight.”
He crossed his arms. Didn’t women have some sort of code about kissing and telling? “Oh, yeah? How did she describe it?”
“Uh-uh. You’ll have to ask her that yourself.”
Drew felt a kick to his shin. “Ow.”
He glanced down to see Micah glaring at him.
“What was that for?”
Micah kicked him again.
Drew picked him up, mindful not to toss him in the air. “What’s got your diaper in a twist?”
“He’s just ornery. I warned you.”
Chuckling, Drew asked, “How about if we watch a movie together?”
“Thomas.”
“Thomas?” Drew raised an eyebrow.
Kat groaned. “Thomas the Tank Engine. We’ve already watched it once today. And umpteen times yesterday. I think I may lose my mind. But at least he’s giving Bob the Builder a rest.”
“Why don’t I take the next showing?”
“You don’t have to ask me twice, Kimosabe. I’ll be on the deck if you need me.” She headed toward the sliding door. “Oh, and it should go without saying, don’t toss or shake the kid. And don’t let him go to sleep.”
“Sounds easy enough.” Drew popped in the DVD and settled on the couch next to Micah.
The toddler sighed and snuggled close.
Drew felt the beginnings of a sweet ache in his chest. He stroked Micah’s silky hair, more content than he’d ever been. He smiled as he watched his son watch the movie. Micah was enthralled. He repeated dialogue at random and seemed to know it from start to finish.
He glanced at the boy when he stopped repeating dialogue. Micah’s eyelids kept closing. His head would bob, then he’d jerk awake.
“Hey, none of that, kid. You’re not supposed to fall asleep.”
Micah responded by lying down and settling his head on Drew’s lap.
Drew stroked his hair. “Tough day, huh, buddy?”
The boy didn’t respond. His chest rose and fell with an even rhythm.
Drew didn’t have the heart to wake him. He’d just let him catch a five-minute catnap first. That certainly couldn’t hurt, could it?
Thomas the Tank Engine and Percy worked together to save the town. Good moral. But not very exciting for an adult.
Drew’s head drooped and he jerked awake.
He leaned back against the couch for just a minute….
“Drew, wake up.”
He straightened. “I’m awake. I don’t sleep on the job. Not when I’m sentry.”
Annie crossed her arms over her chest. “You most certainly did.”
He wiped his hand across his face. “The heat must’ve gotten to me today. I didn’t hear you come in, and that’s unusual.”
She shook Micah’s shoulder. “Wake up, sweetie. Mommy’s home.”
Micah murmured something, but didn’t open his eyes.
“I hope he hasn’t been asleep long.”
“Um, no.” He glanced at the clock and realized with a shock they’d been out for at least forty minutes.
Kat entered the room. “I thought I heard your voice.”
“I walked in and found these two sound asleep. I’ll never get Micah to bed at eight. His schedule’s going to be all messed up, he’ll wake up cranky tomorrow and it’ll go downhill from there.”
After seeing Micah in action at the picnic, Drew had a new understanding of how much time and energy it took to single-handedly keep the child safe, let alone happy.
“I’m sorry—”
“I’m sorry, Annie,” Kat interrupted. “I forgot to tell Drew not to let him fall asleep. It’s my fault.”
Annie sighed. “Nothing to be done about it now. I was hoping for an early night, and he’ll probably be awake till at least eleven.”
Drew noticed the shadows under her eyes and felt bad. He opened his mouth, but Kat shot him a glare.
Closing his mouth, he decided he didn’t want to lose an ally by seeming ungrateful of her sacrifice.
“I’ve, um, got some reports to write for work. I better get going,” he said. “Should I come by the same time on Thursday?”
Annie hesitated. “I guess so.”
Drew was relieved. Time with his son was precious and he didn’t want to blow it.
CHAPTER SEVEN
ANNIE TRIED NOT TO GET impatient when Kat wouldn’t meet her gaze. Her best friend either had early Alzheimer’s or she was up to something. “What do you mean you can’t stay for dinner? It’s Thursday…you always—You called me not two hours ago to say you’d picked up a frozen lasagna to heat and were going to eat with us.”
She tried not to be distracted by the sight of Drew lifting Micah so the boy could sit on the table. The flex of his biceps distracted her, reminding her he was a man’s man even when he pitched in with the domestic stuff.
Or maybe he was in collusion with her best friend, who seemed extremely interested in the floor.
“Um, like I said, something came up.”
Annie gave up. Anything Kat did was with the best intentions. It was her soft heart that sometimes got her into trouble. “I hope Micah grows up to be as horrible a liar as you.”
Kat’s eyes widened. “I don’t know what you’re talking about…I popped that frozen lasagna in the oven about an hour ago, by the way. It should be ready anytime now.”
“Thanks, Kat. You’re too good to us.”
“Of course I am. Now, I need to get out of here. Dillon is pining for my presence.” She gathered her purse, keys and cell phone from the breakfast bar. On her way to the front door, she called, “It’s the party-size lasagna. I bet if you twist his arm, Drew will agree to stay. No need to waste all that food.”
Now Annie was certain she was being maneuvered. “You don’t fight fair.”
“No, I don’t. But it’s just one of my many charms.” Kat’s cell rang as she opened the door. “Hey, Dillon, I’m leaving right now.”
When the door shut, the apartment seemed quiet, intimate.
Drew raised an eyebrow. “She’s kind of like a whirlwind, huh?”
“Kat is definitely a force of nature. And she’s right—it’s one of the things I love about her.”
“Then I guess I’d better love it, too, because she se
ems to have taken pity on my starving-bachelor plight.”
The thought of Drew sharing a meal in Annie’s home seemed too…well, familylike. But there was no graceful way out. And he had been nice enough to rearrange his schedule to be here with Micah. “Please stay for dinner. As Kat said, we don’t want the food to go to waste.”
“Then I’ll accept.”
“Good.” Annie stood there, transfixed by the unexpected effect of his smile. But then again, his smile had had a similar effect the night they’d met.
And look where it had gotten her.
She forced herself to concentrate. Dinner. Food.“Would you mind watching Micah while I pull together a salad and get things served up?”
“Sure.” He handed the boy a fork. “We’re buds, aren’t we?”
Micah crowed, “Buds.”
AS THEY SAT AT THE dining table tucked away in an alcove in the family room, Drew wondered if dinner would provide more insight into Annie, who, in her own way, was as fascinating as her alter ego, Grace.
Kat had insisted Annie liked to eat casually. The family-style serving and her choice of simple white dishes seemed to confirm it.
Drew watched as she navigated the currents of toddler eating preferences, setting a plastic plate in front of Micah. She’d precut his portion into bite-size pieces. The reason soon became apparent.
Drew picked up Micah’s fork, speared a piece of pasta and aimed for the kid’s mouth.
“Me do,” Micah insisted.
Annie laughed. “Why does that not surprise me? He wants to do everything himself, but I thought he might let you get away with feeding him.”
Micah grabbed the pasta from the fork and shoved it into his mouth, smearing sauce on his lips.
“Good for developing fine motor skills, I guess.” Drew set the fork down.
“That’s what the pediatrician says. But it’s hell on my carpeting and tile.”
Annie stood and went to the front room, returning with a newspaper. She arranged it on the floor beneath the boy’s chair.
“Okay, you do it.”
“Is he really that messy?” Drew asked.
She laughed, her eyes bright. “You have no idea.”
Ten minutes later, he had to admit she’d been right. He had no idea.
“Please tell me they learn to use forks and spoons by age two.”
“Sorry to disappoint you. Utensils frustrate him. Looks like it’ll be finger foods for a while.”
“Maybe he just needs practice. Here, guy, why don’t I help you out?” He picked up Micah’s fork again.
Micah shoved Drew’s hand away and screeched, “Me do!”
“Okay, okay.” Turning to Annie, Drew said, “He certainly has strong opinions.”
“Yes, he does. Must’ve gotten it from his father.”
“I’m not nearly as outspoken.”
The banter made him realize what he’d been missing. What Annie had kept from him. This. The cozy feeling of being almost like a real family. Being a dad to his son.
“This is nice,” he said, suddenly feeling anything but nice. He tried to swallow his bitterness as he added, “Having dinner with you two. Thanks for inviting me, even if it was under duress.”
Annie fiddled with her napkin. “I wouldn’t say duress. It’s just hard for me…letting someone new in. Someone I don’t know all that well.”
“So you haven’t dated much?” It came out more of a challenge than a question. Drew waited.
“Only once since Micah was born. It was a disaster. Micah got sick and I had to rush home, and my poor date just didn’t seem to get it. That I’d choose to be with my sick child over him. I knew then that it wouldn’t work. Maybe I’ll try again when Micah’s a little older.”
Drew exhaled slowly. “Yeah, maybe when he’s older.”
Like twenty.
He tried to tell himself it was natural to feel protective of the mother of his child. Even though she clearly didn’t want him to be the father of her child.
“Thank you for arranging your schedule to be here with Micah today.” She passed the glass salad bowl to him. “It makes things easier.”
“My boss is a family man, so he understands that I want to spend as much time with Micah as possible. Since I’ve been with the company for almost ten years—except for Iraq—he trusts I’ll get my work done.”
He heaped garden salad onto his plate and set the bowl out of Micah’s reach. He’d learned quickly.
Annie raised an eyebrow. “You told your boss about Micah?”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
She shrugged. “I guess it might be hard to admit. Some people consider it a mistake.”
“Was it hard for you when it became obvious that you were pregnant?”
“No. I switched school districts, so nobody knew me from before. The staff was very good to me when I thought…you died. I didn’t get specific about our marital status.”
It pleased him that she’d been upset when she thought he’d died. Even if she’d cheated his parents out of two years with Micah. He knew the distance wouldn’t have kept his mother from her grandson. “I wish it hadn’t been that way. If only you’d told me…”
“I can’t go back and undo what’s been done. I’m sorry, I really am. But it’s not fair to keep bringing it up.”
He fisted his napkin. He was tired of being fair. “Annie—”
“Excuse me, we need more napkins.” Abruptly she stood and went to the kitchen.
Drew thought a sensitive guy would probably go after her, but he wasn’t feeling particularly sensitive tonight. Besides, leaving Micah alone with sharp objects didn’t seem like a good idea.
She returned almost immediately with a stack of napkins. And he was afraid he could see dampness behind the lenses of her glasses.
He could have kicked himself for making her feel bad. He had to let his resentment go—if only to help this woman…the mother of his child. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you. I just get into what-ifs. Things might have been so different.”
“How? Would you have rushed to my side to marry me only to leave again and almost get killed? How in the world could that have helped either of us?”
He thought about Beth and how devastated she’d been when Orion died. Somehow he doubted she’d have given up that time with her husband for someone in a safer occupation. But they’d shared thousands of nights together and all the days in between.
“I don’t know, Annie. I’m stumbling through this and not doing a very good job of winning you over.”
“You don’t have to win me over. Just be a good father to our son.”
“I’ll do my best.”
They ate in silence for a few moments. Even Micah curtailed his baby chatter, apparently sensing the tension in the room.
Drew wanted their easy conversation back. The warmth, the give and take.
“I’m glad you stayed in the Tempe area. I’ve always liked it.”
“I thought about moving to Payson to be closer to my mom, but there aren’t as many opportunities there. How about you? Were you tempted to move closer to your folks?”
“They just moved to Oregon. The rest of my family is in Michigan and they really wanted me to move back. But I needed…some space to think things out after I left Iraq. My future, what I wanted to do with my life. Being over there changed my outlook.”
“I can imagine,” she murmured, her eyes shadowed.
“There were Americans over there who I would have never met otherwise. And we ended up being closer than family. People I would give my life for.”
Annie studied him for a moment. “You really mean that, don’t you?”
“Absolutely.”
She busied herself cleaning Micah’s face. It looked like a hopeless task to Drew.
Annie apparently came to that conclusion, too. She sighed and tucked the napkin by Micah’s plate.
“Are you going back?”
“I’m not sure. That’s one of the thin
gs I have to think about. There’s so much need over there. Our people, their people.”
She leaned forward. “But what about your parents and everyone who loves you? Don’t you have a duty to stay safe for them? Have you thought about how it would destroy them?” Her voice was taut and low.
“How could I not consider my family? I’m hoping they would support me no matter what I decided.”
“Even if it meant breaking their hearts?”
Drew shifted in his seat. “This conversation is getting pretty intense. Maybe we should change the subject.”
“I didn’t mean to pry.” But her expression remained troubled as she sipped her iced tea.
Clearing his throat, he asked, “So tell me about your job. Do you work with a group of kids?”
“No, just one. We’re kind of joined at the hip during the school day. But I try to give him plenty of room to be a kid and socialize, too.”
Drew realized he’d been eating, but hadn’t tasted a bite. He consciously slowed down and focused on enjoying being here with Annie and Micah. “Yeah, it’s gotta be rough as a teen having an adult with you all day. Not much room for trouble that way, though.”
Annie smiled, but she seemed distracted. “Oh, they still try every now and then. But I’ve been extremely lucky. All my kids have been great. There’s a special bond there.”
They talked more about her job, his job and how Micah could recite numbers one through ten.
Drew leaned over and ruffled the boy’s hair. “You’re a pretty smart kid, huh?”
“Me smart.” Micah’s cheeks bulged with food. Sauce was smeared on his chin.
After a dessert of chocolate ice cream, Drew helped clear the dishes, and prepared to leave.
Annie walked him to the door, Micah on her hip.
“I’ve gotta go, buddy.”
“No go.” Micah held his arms out to him.
Drew couldn’t believe it. The boy wanted him to stay. Wanted him. He blinked several times. It shouldn’t be this way. He shouldn’t have to leave his son.
He took the toddler, fully aware of Annie’s reluctance to let him go.
“I’ve got to go home to sleep at my apartment, big guy. That’s where my bed is. And you need to sleep here.”
Micah wrapped his arms around his neck and hugged him hard.
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