I shake my head. “Seriously, Dude?
Kyle laughs. “I’m just kidding. It was probably her first kiss so that makes sense.”
My heart stops for a second. “What do you mean?”
He shrugs. “Just some things she said the other day when I asked for advice on how to break-up with Mandy. She mentioned she has never been in a relationship.”
I laugh. “That doesn’t mean that she has never kissed anyone.”
“Trust me. I can sense these things. I’m right.”
“What the hell are you now? The kiss whisperer?”
I take a minute to consider this. If he’s right, this makes things a lot more difficult.
“I have a favor to ask you,” I say.
“What?”
“I want you to ask her out on a date.”
“Dude!” He shakes his head. “You’re full of surprises today. First you wanted me to stay away and now you want me to ask her out? Even if I do, she’s going to laugh in my face.”
“Maybe not flat out ask her on a date, but I don’t know… ask her to go to the party with you after the game on Friday.”
“I thought you told me she has a curfew.”
“You can still go to the party for a couple of hours.”
“I feel like I’m getting in the middle of something seriously screwed up,” he says.
“Relax.”
“Fine. But tell me to back off if you want me to step out of your way. Seriously, I don’t want our friendship to get all weird.”
“I will,” I agree.
I try to break the tension, “I’m going to play baseball for the school. Friday will be my first game.”
He almost spits his drink out. “Holy Hell! Are you serious?”
“Yep. But I’m keeping it a secret from everyone until Friday.”
“Skylar changed your mind, didn’t she?”
“Yeah. But I haven’t been able to tell her either. I was going to… last night. I’ll find a way to tell her tomorrow. I would like her to know before everyone else does.”
SKYLAR
I missed school today. I just didn’t feel like getting out of bed. Mom and Dad gave me a break, but said it’s only for a day.
Mike texts me to see if I’m okay. I text a quick reply saying yes and that I’m going back to sleep, but I can’t. My mind keeps going back to the night before. I don’t get why Alec kissed me, other than maybe that he felt sorry for me. I wish he hadn’t done that. I like being friends again, but even Mom warned me not to get close to him. Apparently, even she has heard of the no dating rule and his crazy refusal to get treatment if he gets sick again. After the night she and dad found us at Uncle J’s, she has started to worry.
I need to find a way to avoid him, or to forget him. I can’t look at him that way. And about prom… I just have to tell him that is off the table. Going as friends or not, it’s a bad idea.
Later in the day, I hear the doorbell ring. Mom and Dad are still at work so I get out of bed and go see who it is. It’s Kyle. I completely forgot we were supposed to practice.
“Have you been sleeping all day?” he asks.
I laugh. “Do I look that bad?”
“No. Your pajamas kinda gave it away.” He smiles. “Do you still want to practice?”
“Yeah. We can.”
Singing is a nice escape. It also helps that Kyle doesn’t mention yesterday, or Mandy, or Alec for that matter. We just hang out like nothing happened.
But after a while, I can see that there is something on Kyle’s mind.
I stop mid-song, after he messes up part of the lyrics.
“What?” he asks.
“You tell me. What’s going on?”
“Nothing.”
“Liar.”
“Fine. Do you want to go to the party with me on Friday after the game?”
I cock my head to the side, and for a split second I question whether I heard him right. I don’t even know how to respond to that.
“You can tell me no. I’m a big boy.”
“No. That’s not it—it’s just that—please tell me you didn’t break up with Mandy because of me.”
“Mandy and I had a lot of issues.”
“Why are you asking me?”
“Because I want to.”
“Did anyone ever tell you that you are a horrible liar?”
He bursts into laughter. “A few people.” He pauses. “Do you want me to be honest with you?”
“Hmm Yeah.”
“Alec asked me to ask you.”
I feel like the air has been knocked out of my chest.
“Wow. This is about last night, isn’t it? He told you.” I say, embarrassed, and he nods. I feel hurt that Alec is really trying to—I don’t know what he is trying to do, but it hurts.
I look down, avoiding Kyle. I wish last night had never happened.
“Look at me,” says Kyle, and I do. He looks more serious than I’ve ever seen him look before.
“Can you keep something between you and me?”
“Sure.”
“Promise?”
I sigh. “Yes”
“I should have been honest from the start. I can’t really ask you out because my boy is into you.”
“Alec?”
“Yes.”
“No, he isn’t. And I’m not into him either—and his stupid rules drive me insane.”
“You’re both liars… and worse liars than I am. Look, I can’t tell you how to feel about him, but I know Alec. Let me prove it to you. There is nothing I hate more than playing games, but come to the party with me. I bet he’ll tell me to back off once he realizes how hard headed he’s being about those stupid rules. I mean… you already got him to change his mind about one thing.”
“What do you mean?”
“Please don’t say that I told you. He was going to tell you last night… He’s playing for the school. The team doesn’t know either. They’ll find out at the game on Friday.”
For the first time since yesterday, I find myself smiling.
CHAPTER THIRTY
ALEC
I feel like my world is spinning out of control and I’m going against every rule I set for myself. It was stupid to ask Kyle to take Sky to the party, but I need to let it go. I made a choice for myself and that choice also protects her. She doesn’t need to get attached to me. She already has too many bad things going on in her life.
After a whole day of not hearing from her, I decide to send her a text.
‘Hey.’
‘Hey.’
‘What are you doing?’ I ask.
‘Reading.’
I was going to ask her to meet me outside so I can tell her about the game because I don’t want to tell her by text, but I decide to wait until the next day.
‘Are you going to school tomorrow?’
‘Yes.’
‘I’ll drive you, if that’s okay.’
‘Ok.’
She meets me by the truck in the morning. I drive us to school but before she can get out of the truck, I say that I have something to tell her.
“I talked to the coach about playing baseball for the school. He said yes,” I tell her and she smiles as soon as I say it. “I’m probably not going to play much being an extra, but either way, I’m not telling anyone else until Friday. That will be my first game. I’d love for you to be there.”
“That is amazing, Alec! Of course I’ll be there,” she says with a huge smile, which makes the next thing she says that much harder.
“So — Kyle asked me to go to the party with him after the game Friday.”
Damn. I guess I didn’t think he would move so quickly.
“Yeah? What did you tell him?” I ask but I’m not sure what I’m hoping for.
“Are you fine with me going with your friend?” she asks.
I hesitate. What the hell is happening to me? I need to cut this out. “Yes. I’m okay with it.”
For a split second, she seems disappointe
d, or maybe I’m just imagining things.
“I’ll see you around, Alec.”
She gets out of the truck, and I sit here, watching her go.
I find myself doing something that I never would have imagined doing before.
I call my mom and ask if she can make an appointment for my checkup. I’m not even due for one yet, but I guess if there is something going on, I would rather know now.
That sends her into a crazy place. “Alec, honey? Are you feeling okay?”
“Yes, I’m okay, Mom.”
But that isn’t enough to calm her down.
“I’m going to call the doctor right now. I’ll call you right back.” She hangs up.
A few minutes later, she calls me back. “They can’t see you until Friday morning. Are you sure you are feeling okay?”
“Yes, Mom.” I realize I haven’t even told her about baseball yet. “I decided to play baseball again. Just for fun… I’ll probably be benched most of the time anyway because they already have a full team. I have a game Friday evening. I just wanted to make sure everything is okay.”
“Oh, honey. I feel like I can breathe again. I was getting worried. Now this makes sense.”
“Okay, Mom. I gotta get to class, okay? Love you.”
***
I try to stay busy with baseball for the rest of the week. I know Kyle and Sky have been practicing for the talent show and I try to stay out of it. At school, she seems to be spending more time with Kyle than Mike, too. Maybe that is good. I don’t know what to think.
I have to miss school Friday because of my doctor’s appointment and I’m worried because that is the day Mandy and Lizzie are supposed to be back at school. I end up asking Kyle and some of the other guys from the team to keep an eye on things.
While at the hospital, I keep worrying about things at school. Kyle texts me at lunch saying that everything is fine, other than Mike is acting weird and trying to keep Skylar away from everyone. I think maybe he wants to protect her as much as the rest of us.
The doctor tells us that everything looks good so far, but some results will take a few days and he’ll call us then. Mom then says that she’s going to see a friend who works at the hospital. I know who the friend is. She is one of the nurses who took care of me. Mom is surprised when I offer to go with her.
We go up to the oncology floor and while she talks to her friend, I find myself walking toward the playroom.
There is a group of little kids playing around. Some of them are even smiling and laughing. They seem fine, happy, but they’re so young that I wonder if they really understand what is happening to them and what could happen. It just makes me so mad seeing kids in this situation. It’s so unfair.
“Do you want to go in?” asks one of the other nurses.
I look at her and I shake my head.
She stands there on my side, quietly, just watching them play.
When I turn around, mom’s friend is gone and Mom is standing there, waiting on me.
She smiles. “Are you ready?”
“Yeah. Let’s go.”
“Do you want to tell me what you were thinking about?” she asks in the elevator.
I sigh. “I wish I was as brave as some of those kids.”
“You were, Alec. You still are. People just process things differently.” She pauses. “Now come on. We have a game to get you to.”
SKYLAR
I hate being at school today. Lizzie and Mandy are back and are acting like nothing even happened. In fact, everyone acts that way. Alec isn’t at school and Mike tries to keep me away from Mandy and Lizzie as much as possible. And so does Kyle, but he does it from a distance. He tries to get close, but I don’t think he likes Mike too much.
Mike drives me home after school. When he parks the car, he shuts the engine off.
“Do you want to tell me what is going on with you, Kyle, and Alec?” He pauses and I look at him confused. “Something seems off. Kyle keeps watching you and Alec seems to be avoiding you at times.”
Wow. Is there anything he doesn’t notice? I don’t know how much of the truth to tell him. Finally, I decide to test the waters by easing him into some of what is happening.
“Kyle asked me to go to a party with him after the game tonight.”
His jaw drops. “So, the things that Mandy was accusing you of—”
“Still not true and it still didn’t give her the right to hit me.”
“I didn’t mean it like that, Skylar. It’s just that—first Alec, and now Kyle. I don’t know what is going on with you, but you don’t belong in that group.”
“I know they are both out of my league, Mike. And Alec is just a friend. He doesn’t even date.”
“I didn’t say that they’re out of your league,” he snaps.
“Mike, how is telling me that I don’t belong any different than Mandy or Lizzie telling me that?”
“Jesus, Skylar.” He starts the car back up. “I should go.”
“Ugh. I’m sorry, Mike. I’m just annoyed at some things and I’m taking it out on you.”
“You don’t say!” he says sarcastically. “So, are you going with Kyle to this party?”
I shrug. “I think so. Do you want to go with me?”
“Hell no.” he says. “But if you need a ride home, you can call me.”
“Jeez. Thanks.” I pause. “Can you go to their baseball game with me?” I ask.
“Skylar. I don’t know…”
“Please,” I beg.
“I guess. But I’m going home after.” He pauses. “Where is this party he’s taking you to anyway?”
“Grayson’s farm.”
He shakes his head.
I try to change topics. “Do you want to grab something to eat before we go to the game?”
“Sure.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
When we get to the game, Alec’s mom spots me and calls me over to sit with her. Mike sits on my other side.
“How was his appointment today?” I ask. I was surprised he went to the doctor to begin with.
“It went well. We’re still waiting on some tests, but everything seems good.” She smiles. “I can’t believe he joined the team again. I actually had mixed feelings about him playing before, but getting to see him this excited about playing again… ” She stands up and waves at someone. I look over and see that it’s Alec’s dad.
For the first time since I got here, I look over at the guys on the team. I scan through them, looking for Alec.
“Where is he?” I ask her.
“Hiding,” she laughs. He wants to surprise the team.
The coach gets all of the players in the middle of the field, facing him, and Alec’s mom sends someone a text message. A few seconds later, I see Alec coming toward the field. The guys’ backs are to him, and he is smiling from ear to ear. He is wearing his full uniform too and he looks like—”
“Skylar!” Mike gets my attention. “Drooling much?”
“Shut up, Mike. I’m just not used to seeing him like that.”
“Are we ready to win this or what?” says Alec and all the guys look behind them. They all look confused, except for Kyle.
“Welcome Alec to the team, guys,” says the coach and all the guys start high fiving, woohooing and all that guy stuff.
The guys start to break and go to the dugout while the other team takes their positions. Alec is about to go sit down with some of the guys when the coach stops him.
Alec turns around to face the coach.
“You're starting, buddy.”
My heart starts racing. I look over at his mom and there are tears running down her face. I hold my breath in until he hits the first ball… and it goes far. He takes off running and everyone is cheering and yelling his name. It’s a homerun and people cheer even louder. He is amazing. I can’t believe he was throwing all of this away.
Mike leans in, “Are you sure you’re going to that party with Kyle? Because more and more I get the feeling you’re d
oing something stupid, and you’re going to end up getting hurt.”
“I’m just happy for Alec, Mike. He is a friend.”
Mike rolls his eyes and we go back to watching the game.
Alec ends up playing a lot more than he told me he would. After the game, his mom calls him over and tells him how proud she is. Alec looks over at Mike and me.
“You did amazing,” I say.
He’s still smiling from ear to ear.
Then Kyle comes up behind him and throws his arm around Alec’s shoulders.
“It’s good to have you back, Bro.”
“Thanks, man.”
“I’m going to hit the showers before we head to Grayson’s. Skylar, you’re still going, right?” Kyle looks over at me and I nod.
He smiles. “I’ll be right out.”
Alec looks over at me. “I guess I’ll see you later then.” He smiles but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes this time.
Alec and Kyle go towards the locker room and his parents say their goodbyes. “Make sure they behave,” says his mom, and I laugh.
Mike is just staring at me. “What?” I roll my eyes at him.
“You’re playing with fire. That’s what.”
I don’t say anything. Maybe I am, and I decide not to tell Mike why Kyle and I agreed to go together. I’m saddened by the realization that I used to be able to tell Mike everything, but now, things are weird. I feel like anything I share with him will lead to a lecture.
“Are you sure you don’t want to come to the party? I ask.
“Seriously, Skylar. You’re the only person in this school that I talk to and you’re going to be there with Kyle. I’m not in the mood to be a third wheel… But you can still call me if you need a ride back.”
He keeps saying that like he knows this won’t end well and it’s annoying me to the point where I let it go. It’s best if he doesn’t go anyway.
After a few minutes, Alec and Kyle come toward us. They look like they coordinated what they are wearing. It’s funny in a way. They’re both wearing jeans and black shirts.
I laugh and shake my head.
“What?” Kyle asks.
“Nice matching outfits. Do you guys usually shop together too?”
Kyle and Alec both smile.
“Ready?” says Kyle.
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