by Amber Kalkes
I roll my eyes and he smirks, seemingly amused by my ire. Gripping my front door’s doorknob in his hand, he sends me one last grin. I glare at him in response, making him laugh. I don’t know what to make of this relationship we have, but it makes me uneasy. Why won’t he just leave?
“Weren’t you leaving?” I ask feebly.
He winks at me, “So I was. Goodnight, wallflower.”
I grimace at the nickname, but he’s gone before I have any chance to complain about it. Walking over to the door, I lock the chain and deadbolt quickly. It’s false security. I’m sure he can break it down or find some other nefarious way to get in if he really wanted to. I feel better. Leaning back on the door, I glance over at Florence who is making her way across my bed and sigh.
“We’re in deep now, aren’t we?”
She meows and I purse my lips.
“Well, maybe not you, but I am.” I grumble as I come to sit on the edge of my bed.
Falling back against my mattress, I fling my arms over my head as I land. As I listen to her purrs in my ear, Florence starts to knead her paws against my shirt. My mind is swimming in every bit of conversation I’ve been a part of tonight, and the exhaustion finally starts to take hold. I fall asleep quickly and it’s one of the most restful ones I’ve had in a long time.
Chapter Nine
Foreboding
I get out of the shower, ruffle a towel through my hair, then wipe the steam from my bathroom mirror. I look a little better, more rested that’s for sure. I only woke up two hours ago and even managed to eat a whole bowl of ramen. It took me almost an hour to finish it. I did devour it, so that’s something.
I wrap the towel around my body and leave my bathroom with a new bandage on my hand. I shiver as the crisp air hits me and grip my towel tighter around me. Of course, I nearly have a heart attack when I see Tobias sitting at my desk again. With a sharp gasp, I grab my chest and I try to calm the beating organ hidden in there. I’m stunned momentary but eventually manage to come up with something scathing to say.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I ask breathlessly.
Not exactly the delivery I was hoping for, but the sentiment is right.
He smirks as he runs his eyes over my towel clad form, “I’ve come to collect you.”
“You said you weren’t going to break in anymore.”
His smirk only widens, “I lied and besides I’ve brought you clothing.”
“And that makes it okay for you to just barge in here?” I snap.
He’s suddenly in front of me. In my surprise, I stumble back and tighten the grip on my towel. How did he move so fast? I barely saw him move! He seems to notice my disbelief because he’s looking a bit smug. I narrow my eyes at him, but it only gives his expression a certain amount of mirth at my expense. He lifts a hand slowly, and I manage to keep still as he reaches out to tuck my damp hair behind my ear.
“Yes because you answer to me, not the other way. That’s the deal.”
“You agreed.” I argue feebly.
His eyes darken suddenly and he grabs my wrapped up hand, “And you promised not to hurt yourself anymore.”
I blush and snatch my hand back from his, “T-That’s from yesterday.”
“I didn’t notice it yesterday.”
“Well that’s when it’s from.” I snap before sighing, “I’m sure you were just distracted with my other more alarming scars.”
“I was distracted.” He admits.
I look at the chipped blue polish on my toenails and shrug, “It happens, but please, can you stop breaking into my apartment? It makes me anxious knowing you can just come in here whenever you want. I think of my house as my sanctuary and you barging in here doesn’t help my state of mind.”
My eyes flicker up to peek at him and he’s staring at me with an expression bordering on pity. I don’t like it but there’s little I can do about it. It’s better that he knows what a fucked up little pet he’s just acquired. I feel pressure lifting my head under my chin, so I have to meet his unsettling eyes. I squirm at the intensity in them. Why doesn’t he talk? All this staring has me on edge.
“That’s something we need to talk about, your state of mind.” He says tightly, “I noticed you’ve been taking anti-depressants. How long?”
“This time? A few months.”
“You’ve taken them before?”
“Yes.”
“How many times before?”
“I’ve been on three different brands.”
He purses his lips, “And none of them have worked?”
“If they did, do you think I would have asked you to kill me?”
He lifts a brow and let’s go of my chin, “Fair enough. What else do you do? Other than the cutting and the pills? A therapist perhaps?”
I swallow thickly, how did he know?
“Yes.”
“When do you see the good doctor?” He asks with a hint of mocking in his tone.
“I have an appointment for Thursday.” I mumble.
He nods but says nothing more. I take that as the end of this conversation. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a white box sitting on my bed. It’s so clean and perfect that it makes my apartment look even more like a shit hole around it. Walking over to the bed, I kneel down and run my hands softly over the top the box. I almost don’t want to open it, afraid of what he could possibly want me to wear, but that won’t cure my curiosity.
Pushing off the lid, I let out a sigh of relief to see it’s not some bright, pink sparkly number. Instead, it’s a navy colored dress with matching navy colored lace overlay and long lace sleeves. I pinch the fabric in my fingers and feel myself soften towards Tobias for the sleeves. I would have felt so uncomfortable if I’d have to leave myself exposed like that all night and for the eyes of others.
“It’s pretty,” I whisper before looking at him over my shoulder, “Thank you.”
I can’t read his expression but it looks nearly pained as he regards me. He suddenly clears his throat and speaks, “Yes, well, perhaps you should go get ready, hmm?”
Grabbing the dress in my hand, I feel his eyes on me as I grab the right undergarments from my bins and scurry off to the bathroom. I practically slam the door closed behind me and grip my head as the room starts to spin a little. I shouldn’t have ran, that was a lot work on so few calories. Placing my clothes on the edge of the sink, I shake my head and try to focus on the task at hand.
I don’t own any makeup, I never saw the point in it. So, as a result, I’m left with a bare but clean face. There isn’t much that anyone can do to make the flat dark strands of my hair do anything but play dead, so I don’t even bother with that. All that’s left is the outfit. Pulling on some underwear, thin black tights, and a strapless bra, I look all over the dress for a zipper. When I find it down the side, I step into it and pull it up, trying really hard not to get the lace caught on anything.
I should be surprised that it fits perfectly, but I’m not. Inspecting my reflection, I don’t feel either way about it. I’m not thrilled but I’m not underwhelmed either. It’s just me, but this time in a dress. What a sight I must be.
When I walk out of the bathroom, I instantly feel Tobias’ eyes on me. They burn holes into my back as I wander back to the makeshift closet and look at my shoes. I only have two options, my sneakers, or my scuffed up motorcycle boots. Considering the snow and the lack of traction on my sneakers, I decide on my boots. Slipping them on, they fall about mid-calf. I breathe a sigh of relief that he didn’t pick my shoes. I don’t know what I’d do if he put me in heels. I’ll probably fall and snap my neck. And out of all my options, that’s not the way I want to die.
I’m so caught up in my thoughts, that I don’t hear him approach until I feel his ghost of a touch on my neck. I tense up and stand completely still, as his fingers skim the skin there. His touch is more tolerable than most, but it still puts me on edge. When his breath caresses my ear lobe, I jump a little and I can feel his smirk.
I grimace at the nickname but answer, “T-Thank you.”
He chuckles darkly. “You’re very much welcome. Ready to meet my kind of people?”
“Not particularly, but I don’t think you’re going to give me much of a choice.” I tell him dryly.
“You look delicious, I must say.” He says huskily, ignoring my tone “I don’t think I want to take you out anymore.”
I feel like cold water just got poured on me, as all my insecurities wash over me. Stepping away from him, I wrap my arms self-consciously around myself and try to make myself as small as possible. Is there something wrong with me? Would he be ashamed to be seen with me? Do I blame him if he is? No, I guess I can’t, can I? I chew on my lower lip and tear off another piece of skin, tasting some blood on my tongue. That helps.
“What’s wrong?”
“Do you not want to be seen with me?” I whisper, feeling stupid just asking.
He frowns, “No… why would you think that?”
“You just said…“
“I meant… I think someone may want to steal you from me. I don’t like to share and I like what’s mine to stay mine.”
I feel slightly relieved but scowl at him, “I don’t belong to you.”
His eyes narrow, “For the next two months you do.”
I sigh deeply in frustration but nod. I can’t really argue with that logic, now can I?
He smiles charmingly and offers me his hand, “Fantastic. Now, let’s go.”
* * *
I can feel the vibrations from the thumping music through my shoes, as Tobias and I walk towards the club. It’s a predictably cold night, but luckily it’s stopped snowing. Though, that doesn’t stop me from nearly eating gravel plenty of times. Again, I have to be thankful Tobias didn’t insists on heels though, the dress choice was most likely not the wisest. I’m freaking freezing!
Tobias’s hand is on my lower back most of the time until we draw closer to the club. It doesn’t bother me due to the layer of fabric between his hand and my back so I don’t comment on it. Every time I almost slip though, he has the nasty habit of wrapping his hand around my waist to catch me. I don’t mind the catching. The too familiar hold and length of time of said hold, I do mind.
That being said, I’m surprised to note that every time he brings me against him, I swear I can hear a heartbeat. I think it’s a heartbeat and if it is, how confusing is that? It completely negates all my previous notions about vampires and that’s unsettling. I mean, aren’t vampires supposed to be dead?
I peek up at Tobias and secretly hope he doesn’t sparkle. Admittedly, he does have the stalking, and breaking and, entering thing down pretty good.
As the music gets louder, my attention is drawn to the fast approaching club. It’s all black brick to create the atmosphere, at least this is my guess. It’s like I’m entering another world. People are lined up outside dressed like their either going to a red carpet event or a BDSM club. I, on the other hand, feel like I look like I’m going to homecoming. I feel my anxiety start to build.
Above the red doors that everyone is dying to get into, is the red neon sign telling me the name of the club. ‘The Den’ and if I’m honest with myself, it’s intimidating. It feels like a place Tobias would go. This place is even more overwhelming than the club I went to with Melanie and a little bit scarier. Just a bit.
Tobias guides me past the line of people waiting outside, and I can feel their eyes on me. At least I think they’re staring at me. They could be staring at Tobias but it feels like their staring at me. Unable to fight the urge to fidget any longer, I start to pull down the hem of my dress a little. Tobias’s hand on my back moves to wrap around my waist, making me freeze mid-motion.
“They’re jealous.” Tobias whispers into my ear, making me shiver.
I frown up at him, “Who?”
He nods towards the line and I spot several women outright glaring at me. I’m completely confused. Why would they be jealous? They all look like beautiful amazon women graced with self-assurance. I purse my lips and shake my head, he must be crazy.
“You don’t believe me, do you?”
“Nope. I mean come on. Why would they be jealous?”
Tobias shrugs, tightening his grip around my waist. “Because you're with me, Buttercup. You’re a very lucky girl, did you know that?”
I roll my eyes. He is so arrogant, I can barely believe it. Glancing at him again, I shake that thought out. Of course I can believe it. If there’s anything I’ve learned about Tobias in my few encounters with him, it’s that he possesses complete confidence. I assume he can back it up, but I also hope never to find out.
I’m yanked back when we reach the front and fall back against Tobias’s chest. As I try to find my equilibrium, I notice the man controlling the entry. He is a man I would not want to meet in a darkened alley. In fact, he’s a man I wouldn’t want to meet, ever, if I had a choice that is.
He’s a large bald headed man with an intricate snake tattoo that slithers around the shape of his skull. It’s a head of the snake landing just in front of his right ear, with its tongue extended. He’s wearing sunglasses, despite being nighttime and he’s dressed in an all-black, very expensive looking suit. In his left ear is a small black earpiece. Even though he’s wearing sunglasses, I can feel his eyes on me as Tobias stands behind me, still holding me against him.
“Hello Lucian.” Tobias greets smoothly.
I nearly snort. Great, another cheesy name to add to the list.
The man responds in a deep baritone that seems to resound deep in his chest, “Van Garrett, who is your little morsel?”
I feel Tobias tense against me but his voice is even as he responds, “This is Shoshanna. Say hello, Darling.”
“Hello.” I say automatically in a quiet voice.
Lucian sighs wistfully. “Wonderful. Head inside, Viktor is waiting for you at the usual table but I must warn you he has company.”
“Company?”
“Yes.” Lucian says with a smile, a truly unsettling smile, “Enjoy your night.”
He lifts the black velvet rope and gestures for us to go in. I should run in the opposite direction right now but Tobias has me in a pretty tight hold. So, essentially, I’m trapped like a rat. Taking a few deep breathes, I’m trying to mentally assure myself that no one will touch me and to be honest, that’s about my only fear. Dying or being snacked on by a vampire is kind of why I agreed to this mess in the first place.
Haphephobia, that’s what Dr. Reynolds calls it. It means fear of being touched. He described it as an acute exaggeration of the normal tendency to protect one’s personal space. It’s a fear of contamination or invasion, and it often extends to people who the person even knows, like with me. If I initiate the touch, I’m fine and I’m in control. But when someone else touches me without warning or permission, it scares the shit out of me. Only Dr. Reynolds and I know where it comes from, and it’s not something I readily discuss with anyone, not even my parents.
“Shoshanna.” Tobias says quietly in my ear, bringing me back into the present, “You need to stay near me at all times, don’t wander off and don’t speak unless spoken to, understand?”
“So, just be arm candy?” I ask dryly.
“See,” He grins roguishly, “I knew you were a smart one.”
I roll my eyes, but my annoyance is swiftly taken over by sheer horror. This is obviously not a normal night club. At least, I don’t think it is. I’ve only ever been to one, but if this is what’s normal, I’m not sure nightclubbing is for me. There are servers without tops, just pasties covering their modesty. There are also half naked women in cages, dancing and thumping, and house music filling the air. I think the music could actually be the worst part.
“Come on!” Tobias yells in my ear and I glance up to see him looking far too amused.
Walking further into the club, Tobias is stopped by another guardian of the velvet rop
e. This one has less bulk than Lucian, but he’s no less intimidating. His unsettling light blue eyes are enough to raise all the hair on my body. As we pass by this checkpoint, Tobias walks behind me and starts helping me out of my coat. I shiver as the chill seeps through the lace of my dress.
Tobias’s arm on my back has me jolting forward. I turn back to scowl at him but he only grins back, flashing me his fangs before turning his attention forward. In here, there is less house music and more industrial, which is a relief.
Actually, I can’t help but prefer the private section than the main part of the club in general. It’s not as loud back here and doesn’t smell of various body odors. But, the best part is the low population. Out there I felt like honey to the club goers. They just kept bumping into me. I feel myself relax as I continue to take in the scene. This is infinitely better.
“Remember what I told you?” Tobias asks lowly in my ear, awaiting for my nod, before he continues, “Good. Then for your own well-being and for no wasted effort on my part, try to behave. My kind aren’t always the most civilized when it comes to keeping our hands to ourselves.”
I swallow thickly and croak, “Noted.”
Suddenly, our pace slows down and my heart rate jacks as we go towards a set of red leather couches. A man is sitting on one, his back is facing me but I can see his dark skinned, shaved head. I clench my hands at my sides into fists and my stomach rolls as my anxiety takes hold. The reality of this is really setting in for me now.
As we approach, the man turns his head and does a double take when he sees me on Tobias’s arm. His eyes stun me for a minute. They aren’t red like Tobias’s but more like a liquid mercury. Tobias literally has to keep pushing towards the opposite couch because I’m so caught up in the man’s hypnotizing gaze.
“Don’t look him in the eye.” Tobias orders in my ear before guiding me to sit on the couch opposite to the man.
Following Tobias’ advice, I look away but I can’t stop staring. Something about him is very captivating. His skin is a lovely dark ebony and his head is bald. Around his mouth is perfectly groomed, midnight-black facial hair framing a full set of ebony lips. Those lips turn up and show off a pair of blindingly white teeth, with two fangs where his canines should be.