by Tijan
She nodded. “I know.” She beamed at me, her cheeks growing pink. “I’m very lucky.”
Then it was time. Mena and Denton went their way. There were hugs between everyone. We acted like we wouldn’t see each other in years when Denton and Mena were coming over the next night for dinner. Mena was going to spend the day with me at the hotel pool. I couldn’t swim, but I was going to tan, or at least have a few cocktails. She suggested I invite Carolina, so that was the plan. We were going to have a girls’ day and, even though they never said a word, I knew the guys were going to check on Bryce. Corrigan, Denton, and Bryce were going to have a guys’ day.
It hurt.
I wasn’t allowed to go, but I chose. I had to get used to it.
Then they went their way, and Corrigan and I went ours. When we got to the hotel and after Corrigan checked us in, he held my hand in the elevator. My dad had paid for six months. This was going to be my next home, at least for a while.
When we got there and went inside, I didn’t see the extravagance. I didn’t care. Corrigan took my hand and led me to the room, then, as he cupped my face in his hands, I crumbled.
I whispered to him, “He’s gone.”
“I know,” he whispered back.
“I can’t—I can—,”
“Sshh.” He kissed my forehead and murmured, “You can mourn him, say goodbye to that relationship. He’s coming back. I mean, we’re going to still be friends, but—”
It wasn’t going to be the same.
My eyes searched his. Was this really okay? For me to cry for another man in his arms, but Corrigan understood. He nodded, breathing out, “Yes, Sheldon. You loved him. You can take all the time you want to let him go.” Then he pulled me to his chest and smoothed a hand down the side of my face, tucking my hair behind my ear. He sheltered me there and said, “You have to do this. You can’t love me completely until you let him go. Then, when it happens, then we can be whatever we’re going to be.” He tightened his hold on me, a sense of possession to it, “And I, for one, cannot wait for that to happen.”
Me too. I held onto his arm, trying to relay my words, but I couldn’t. Me too, but first, I did as he said.
I started to let Bryce go.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Corrigan held me that night. I slept half the night and the other half was spent just lying there in his arms. It felt nice. It felt healing, but when morning came, I knew it would take a while. He knew it too. When he got up and made coffee right away, I could feel his concern, but he kept quiet. When I wasn’t looking, I could feel his eyes on me. The fact that he was biting his tongue spoke volumes. At one point, I let out a haggard sigh and leaned against the wall, bending over with my head over my knees. Then I just breathed in and out. I closed my eyes and stopped everything for a moment.
He moved into the room from the bedroom. In a gentle voice, he asked, “Sheldon?”
I didn’t open my eyes. “I’m good. I just . . .” I just need this hole in my chest to close back up, “a minute. I need a minute.” Mena would be coming soon. She had texted thirty minutes ago that they were on their way to the hotel. Carolina had messaged a few minutes later that she’d be coming in an hour. She had a sorority meeting first.
Outsiders were coming. I had to put on a game face. No one saw me vulnerable except Corrigan and Br— just Corrigan now.
A deep sense of mourning rolled through me like one giant riptide.
“Hey.” Corrigan came to stand right next to me.
I tensed. He was going to touch me, try to comfort me, and the injustice of that tore at me. It wasn’t fair. The man I loved shouldn’t have to console the woman he loves over the previous guy. And with that thought, I stuffed it down and I looked up. Straightening my back, I nodded at him. “I’m good.”
He gave me a half-grin. He had bags under his eyes, too. “Liar.”
“Let me pretend.” I grinned back, but like him, I could only form a half one. It wasn’t in me to force a full smile.
His hand lifted and touched the side of my face, his finger resting near the corner of my eye. He murmured, studying me, “You don’t have to. Not with me.”
I started to say something, but paused. We hadn’t talked about him and me, our new relationship status. I bit down on my lip. Was I ready for that conversation now? Right before Mena got here and Corrigan went to check on Bryce with Denton?
“Sheldon.” He moved to stand in front of me, and he held both sides of my face. “Stop worrying. I get it. I do. Your job is to grieve and then heal. Grieve Grace. Grieve what happened to you. Grieve Bryce. I’m not a douche bag. I get what happened. You chose. I do. I’m the guy. I got the girl, but you lost a family member. It won’t be the same. You have to mourn him. I will be here. I’ll always be here, waiting for you, picking you up, carrying you, holding you. I’m here. No matter how long it takes.”
My hands lifted and rested on top of his, holding him as he held me. I wanted to melt down and curse at the same time. “Goddamn. Why do you have to be this guy?”
He laughed, his lip lifting upward. “What guy?”
“The guy.” I gestured to him, from top to bottom. “You’re understanding. You’re considerate. You’re strong. You’re a fucking badass, too. You’re that guy.”
He pretended to groan, still grinning. “The annoying guy.”
I smirked. “Hell yes. The annoying guy because he’s so perfect. That guy.”
Laughing softly again, he leaned forward and rested his forehead on mine. Then he whispered, taking both my hands in his and holding them between us. He whispered to me then, “Don’t you know?”
“Know what?”
“I have to be that guy.” A cocky smirk came over him. “What other type of guy could handle you?”
“Oh.” I grinned and pretended to punch him in the chest. “Now you’re the smart-ass guy, huh?”
“I’ve always been the smart-ass guy,” he softened his tone and pressed his lips to mine, achingly tender. “But I’m the other guy too, the guy that loves you back.”
There it was.
We hadn’t talked about it, not really.
“That’s not fair,” I said.
“What’s not?” He lifted his head and leaned back an inch.
“That. What I said whenever I said it.”
He chuckled. “You said it quite a few times and you said it first when you woke up in the ambulance.”
“I was in an ambulance?”
He nodded. “You were. I was with you.”
“And Bryce?”
“He was, too.”
Oh . . . my chest tightened. “I wish I hadn’t said it.”
A frown flickered over his face.
“Not because I don’t mean it. I wished I hadn’t said it then, when he was there and when I can’t remember it.” Okay. Cue my girly moment. Three. Two. One . . . “I wanted to say it when all of this was dealt with. I wanted to hear it back from you. And, I know it’s really dumb of me, but I wanted to say it so I could see your face. You know, the face someone makes right after they hear those words.” I shrugged, feeling an uncomfortable lump forming in my throat. “It would’ve been the first time we said it to each other. You know?”
He let out a ragged laugh, and pressed his forehead against mine again. He was breathing hard. “Yeah. I know. I know.”
Then we heard the door’s buzzer.
The best timing in the world.
Mena’s voice called through the door, “Guys? Sheldon? It’s me.”
I couldn’t hold the disappointment in and must’ve made a sound because as I started toward the door, Corrigan grabbed my arm and swung me back to the wall. He caught my face in his hands before I could ask what he was doing and he pressed me back. His hips were against mine. His stomach rubbed against mine and his lips came down on mine.
Holy— He kissed in a rough manner. Possessive. Hot. Primal. And it took only one second before my body went up in flames.
Mena knocked o
n the door again, but the sound was distant.
Only Corrigan. His lips opened over mine, taking me over, and I answered his command back. He wanted me. I felt his need and, my god, my body wasn’t holding anything back. I couldn’t, even if I wanted to. I had no control over my body. Since that night, since he held himself back from me, I’d been starving for him. He was here. He was giving himself to me and—the phone was ringing.
Loud thuds came next from the door.
Mena shouted from the other side, “SHELDON! CORRIGAN! ARE YOU GUYS OKAY?” She paused for a moment, taking a breath and she yelled once more, “DO YOU NEED ME TO CALL THE POLICE? I WILL!”
Corrigan ripped his lips from mine, stalked to the door, opened it, and barked out, “One fucking second while I say goodbye to my girlfriend!”
Girlfriend.
Mena’s eyes blinked, and her mouth opened an inch. “Oh—”
He had called me his girlfriend.
Then he slammed the door in her face and came right back to me. My eyes ate him up. His hair was tussled, his eyes fierce, and he had a scowl on his face.
He was gorgeous.
Then he was in front of me, and he wasted no time. His lips found mine, and he lifted me up against the wall. Stepping between my legs, he continued to kiss me, taking control and I loved it, and him. I arched my back off the wall, kissing him back as hard, as hungrily, as demanding as he was and I knew—this was the right man.
I had chosen right.
He swept a hand up my back, resting against my skin, and I drew in a gasping breath. Tingles shot through me, all the way to my toes, and he paused, lessening his hold on me. My legs wrapped around his waist, and I took over the kiss.
We weren’t done.
Mena could wait.
*
Mena did wait. We continued and lost track of time. When Corrigan finally called a stop, we were both half in our clothes and half out. Panting, he gave me a rakish smile and ran a hand through his hair. “Shit.”
Shit, indeed. I laughed hoarsely, shaking my head. “Well. If I didn’t have stitches down my side, I know what we’d be doing all day today.”
“Yeah.” His gaze was raking me up and down as I buttoned my shorts and straightened my top, pulling my bra straps back over my shoulders. “There’s more we can do tonight.”
Tonight. That felt right, too.
“What?”
I looked up. “What?”
“You sighed.”
My eyes widened. “I did?”
He nodded, a fondness settling over his features. “You okay?”
“I am.” And I was. I meant it. Corrigan narrowed his eyes, studying me again, but he saw that I did mean it and he nodded. “Okay then.” Moving forward, he pressed his lips to my forehead, that same loving gesture like always, and he whispered, “I love you, Sheldon.” A second kiss. “I’ll see you later.”
Feeling off balance from all the love and niceness, I swatted his ass as he turned for the door. He glanced back, and I gave him the middle finger. He frowned. “What’s that for?”
I lifted a shoulder up, dropping my hand at the same time. “Just . . . doing my normal thing. We’re being too nice to each other. It makes me uncomfortable.”
Before he opened the door, he flashed me a grin. “In that case, have fun today, bitch.”
“You too, dickwad.”
Barking out a laugh, he opened the door and breezed past Mena.
She started inside, but turned back to call after him, “Goodbye to you, too.”
“Yeah, yeah,” his voice faded as he went to the elevators.
Shutting the door, she rolled her eyes. “I guess saving your life didn’t change everything. He’s still a dick to me.”
I didn’t say a word. I had a feeling there was an idiotic-looking grin on my face as I thought, Yeah, but he’s my dick now. Then I said to her, “Let’s go get our cocktails on. I haven’t been able to drink for a while, and I’m going to rectify that today.”
“Aren’t you on meds?”
“Yes, and it’s called tequila. Let’s go. Poolside, here we come.”
Mena laughed, but followed me out ten minutes later. It was after we had gotten comfortable, after we ordered our first round of drinks, that she said the words that would change everything.
Nothing could’ve prepared me for what was going to happen next.
*
MENA
I wasn’t sure if Sheldon was ready to hear the truth. I wanted to tell her. It was time. She deserved to know everything that I had done for her, for us. I wanted to, but . . . as I followed her from the elevator and to the pool, I wasn’t sure. She had a brave face, but I caught the grimaces of pain.
She looked so tired.
My heart ached for her. She had been through so much. I didn’t know. Did I tell her? Or should I just keep watching over her?
An overweight woman stepped in front of her and Sheldon had to brake suddenly. As a curse spilled from her lips, she sneered at the woman before going around her, zeroing in on our chairs.
That was good. There was some of the old Sheldon. She was a fighter. That’s what Marcus always told me. Man, thinking of him now, I couldn’t help but reminisce. I missed him. We had a good friendship in school. No one knew about us. We kept it secret, but he understood. He loved Sheldon as much as I did. The only thing we didn’t agree on was Bryce and Corrigan. They were so horrible to him, like they were to me, but I understood their heart.
They loved Sheldon. They were protecting her. Anyone who went against them had to earn their place beside her. She was their Queen. The name fitted her, what the media had dubbed her—The Queen Bee Killer.
She had ruled over school, and she would rule everywhere else in life. I had no doubt.
Sheldon was going places. She was special.
“Move it along,” she snapped at two teenage girls. They were giggling together, and Sheldon groaned in the next instant. She said to me, “They’re ogling the lifeguard. Go figure.” The girls hadn’t heard Sheldon so she placed a hand on both their shoulders and barked, “Move. Now. Or be trampled to death.”
One girl gasped. She was all bones with a red bikini on, and I knew instantly she was the popular girl at her school. Her friend glanced nervously at her, waiting to follow whatever the first one would do.
A fond smile graced my face.
The old Sheldon would’ve been these girls’ worst nightmare. She would’ve eaten them up. That’s what she did. Anyone who tried to manipulate her, use her, control her, and Sheldon snapped back—with teeth. She had a bite to follow her bark.
“You don’t have a shot with him, honey.” Sheldon pointed at the girl’s chest. “Those are A cups, if even. Stuffing them will fool ’em for one night. Once that top goes off, poof, there they go. Yep. See.” She pointed across the pool. “That girl’s got a good C cup.” Moving past them, she threw over her shoulder before heading to a lounger, “And a couple years of experience, if you get my drift. Find a guy in your grade. They’re more worth it. Trust me.”
Both girls had moved past their shocked pretentious ways. They were glancing at the guy, considering what she had said as I moved past them.
Yes, she still had that bite.
It was something I loved about her. I was proud she had that fighting spirit in her. I wished so many times I had inherited that from my father. I hadn’t. I had inherited a different way of fighting. I did the unthinkable. I did what people feared, but secretly wished they could do. I was the stalker in the night. Sheldon would give out orders, commanding people to do what she wanted, but I was the type who pulled the strings.
People were like chess pieces. I lined them up until I knew how to strike them down. Not Sheldon, though. I never would have to strike her down. That’s why I protected her. That was my job, even if I had been doing it in secret for so long. Like last year, when I snuck in to her house. Denton’s makeup artist had helped me, even though she never realized I hadn’t been going to
a costume party.
I had gone to Sheldon’s house wearing Marcus’ face. I wanted to check on her and make sure she was fine. I remembered her scream. I hadn’t expected her to see me. No one usually did. I was always in the shadows, but in hindsight, I should’ve known. Of course, Sheldon would be the one to see me.
Dressing as Marcus had been my homage to him. I never thought about how it would’ve frightened her, and I was angry with myself. I should’ve thought ahead.
I hadn’t.
I needed to make it up to her, then I heard what Grace had done. She turned her back on Sheldon. She hurt her. She betrayed her.
She had earned her place in Sheldon’s inner circle and she performed the worst sin. She abandoned Sheldon.
When I heard everything, I knew how I could make things right for Sheldon again.
So I did what I had to do. Grace thought I had come to comfort her. She called me earlier that night and told me what she confessed. She was going to make things right with Sheldon, but it was too late.
She had stabbed her in the back. I wasn’t going to allow her to do it again so I poisoned her wine that night. When she started gasping for breath, she reached out for me. She wanted me to help, but I stood there and waited.
That’s when she realized what I had done, and she knew I was the protector.
That look in her eye, when she realized who I was, it had given me an adrenaline rush. I was important. I was necessary. I wouldn’t let her get close to Sheldon any more. Then there was peace.
Grace was home. I had helped her, too. I knew where she was; she was content. She was probably watching over Sheldon too, just like I was, but on the other side.
Yes.
As Sheldon ordered the first round, I knew it was time. I had to tell her.
“Crap. I gave him the wrong card.” She held her room card. “Shit. He has my credit card. I don’t want him to use that.”
“I’ll grab it. Hold on.”
See? Protecting her. That’s what I was doing.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
SHELDON
“Marcus and I were friends.”