by Steve Cole
He hasn’t changed at all. I’ve heard so many stories about him, over the years: his hundreds of faces and forms; the men and women and animals who have taken that name. And yet, the one who comes to me is so familiar. This one is mine.
I say, ‘Doctor.’
And that funny, skinny man sits beside me. My old friend.
He looks around, at the moonlit pavilions stretching away into the distance. ‘Well, this is a bit of a fuss, isn’t it? What’s wrong? Is someone ill?’
And we both laugh.
‘Where are you now?’ I ask him. ‘Where in your life?’
‘Oh. I’m on something of a final journey myself. Got a little bit poisoned. Like you do. And everything’s about to change, so… I’m just saying goodbye.’ He smiles. A vast sadness in his eyes.
My secret must be told. But before that, I have happier things to say. ‘A wonderful thing happened, Doctor. My mother and father. They found me. They were so old, but so kind, and they came to New Earth, looking for forgiveness, I said there’s nothing to forgive, and we hugged, and…’
I realise he’s nodding. Rather too politely. And then I realise it all.
‘You found them. You sent them to me.’
He says, ‘I might have given them a little nudge.’
I thank him. And hold his hand. The two gold coins in my paw become his.
I ask him, ‘Was he right? The Face of Boe? He said, when last we met, he said, you are not alone. Was that true?’
‘Oh yes!’ said the Doctor, with a grin. ‘And that was just the start! Blimey, I’ve had some times since I last saw you. The things that happened! Where do I begin?’
He draws close, and tells me tales of men and monsters, of scarecrows and statues, of distant drums and ancient floods. He spins yarns and legends all through the night, until I see the first streaks of dawn at the horizon.
But this new day is not for me. I thank the Doctor for his stories, for helping my final hours to pass.
He says, ‘If I’ve done anything good with my life, maybe it’s that. The stories I leave behind.’ Then he asks me, quietly, ‘And what does your religion say, Novice Hame? What happens next? Where does your story go?’
I say, ‘The Great Cat Kingdom.’
He says, ‘D’you believe it exists?’
I tell him, ‘I wonder. That’s all I can do. I wonder.’
And then I grip his hand, tight. Because the moment has come. And the secret must be told.
‘Did you never think, Doctor? How strange it is, that New Earth exists? By what coincidence, it has exactly the same diameter and air and orbit as the original Earth? Because it drew us here, across the stars, every man and woman and cat and dog and bird and beast and spider-kind. The planet called us home. And we thought it a blessing. But as the years passed, I began to think: what if this happened by design? And that thought led to another. What if this world is not a home? What if it’s a trap? A long, slow, careful trap of infinite complexity. So I began to investigate. I looked beneath the surface of this world, and do you know what I found, Doctor? Do you know what I discovered?’
The Doctor says, ‘I think she’s gone.’
He is placing two gold coins upon my eyes.
I say, ‘Doctor? Can you hear me?’
But he’s looking up and beyond me, to my attendant, who steps out of the shadows. I hear them, as though from far away. My attendant asks if I had any last words.
‘I wonder,’ says the Doctor. ‘That’s what she said. Good for her. It’s a fine way to live and a fine way to die, always wondering, right to the end.’
And this is my final realisation. That the secret will have to wait. For other times, other cats, other Doctors.
Because these things are drifting away from me now. All these lords and creatures and apple-grass seem so delicate, and so precious, and so faint. They fall away, these earthly concerns, all that weight and doubt and sensation, falling, and lifting, and dispersing on the breeze.
Dawn floods the world with orange and yellow and white, and I’m a thought now, I’m a whisper, I’m an instinct. I’m hope.
Ending. Or beginning. I don’t know.
I rise towards the sky, and I wonder.
I wonder.
THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING
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First published by BBC Books in 2020
Doctor Who is a BBC Wales production for BBC One.
Executive producers: Chris Chibnall and Matt Strevens
BBC, DOCTOR WHO and TARDIS (word marks, logos and devices) are trademarks of the British Broadcasting Corporation and are used under licence.
BBC Children in Need and Pudsey Bear are trademarks of the BBC and are used under licence.
A Message from the Doctor © Chris Chibnall
Things She Thought While Falling © Chris Chibnall 2020
The Terror of the Umpty Ums © Steven Moffat 2020
Doctor Who and the Time War © Russell T Davies 2020
Revenge of the Nestene © Russell T Davies 2020
Rory’s Story © Neil Gaiman 2020
One Virtue, and a Thousand Crimes © Neil Gaiman 2020
The Simple Things © Joy Wilkinson 2020
The Tourist © Vinay Patel 2020
Fellow Traveller © Mark Gatiss 2020
The Shadow Passes © Paul Cornell 2020
Shadow of a Doubt © Paul Cornell 2020
A Shadow in the Mirror © Paul Cornell 2020
Press Play © Pete McTighe 2020
Listen © Steven Moffat 2020
The Secret of Novice Hame © Russell T Davies 2020
The moral right of the author has been asserted
Cover illustration © Sophie Cowdrey
Cover design by Two Associates
Doctor Who logo and WHO
insigniaTM and © BBC 2018.
Licensed by BBC Studios.
Publishing Director: Albert DePetrillo
Project Editor: Steve Cole
Text design: Richard Atkinson
Production: Sian Pratley
ISBN: 978-1-473-53282-3
This ebook is copyright material and must not be copied, reproduced, transferred, distributed, leased, licensed or publicly performed or used in any way except as specifically permitted in writing by the publishers, as allowed under the terms and conditions under which it was purchased or as strictly permitted by applicable copyright law. Any unauthorized distribution or use of this text may be a direct infringement of the author’s and publisher’s rights and those responsible may be liable in law accordingly.